I wanted to start this because, well......sometimes we just need a little humor in our lives. Feel free to add your own cartoons or humorous anticdotes. Enjoy
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/mp14.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/unemploymentgm8.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/poster74496920.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/diplomacy.jpg)
http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/bbb2da13e8.jpg (http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/bbb2da13e8.jpg)
If that last one is too harsh for language I will delete it. Sorry, that is how it came but still funny.
NOTE: The last one has the f-bomb in it. If you want to see it, just click the link. - Rob
(http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/5/pyzamnocookies.jpg)
(http://hiscrivener.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/exorcist-funny.jpg)
(http://1percent.files.wordpress.com/2006/03/batman.jpg)
sorry if that last one is to dirty
Remember folks, NO POLITICS and NO RELIGION. NO EXCEPTIONS! IF you're in doubt, best to leave it out.
Thank you Wolf man, I've never seen those Star Wars pics before! And yes, I DID need some humor this morning!
Funny stuff people!
Interesting how times change. That Joker comic is one of a kind.
No problem Charp, I love humor threads myself. Who wouldn't rather laugh than read some of the real news of current events. Plus, Universal always makes us cry so a few laughs are a good way to start our day.
Thanks for fixing that one funny with a clickable link. Sorry, I should have thought of that myself. Good way to fix it. People can still pull it up if they want to.
You have to wonder - was it as innocent as we think, or were the boys at DC pulling a fast one on the comics code?
Did you really just say "pulling" a fast one?
(http://img191.imageshack.us/img191/1586/4032664319063d1c2124880.jpg)
(http://img535.imageshack.us/img535/5708/cmsh.jpg)
(http://img821.imageshack.us/img821/3643/mpyodat.jpg)
This is great, bad stuff, y'all. It's light hearted fun that is so bad it's good...
OMG Creeper, that is hilarious. My wife is a big collector of Yoda figures so I have to send her that pic. She is going to roll. I have never seen the one before.
Quote from: Wolf Man on June 20, 2010, 09:35:50 PM
OMG Creeper, that is hilarious. My wife is a big collector of Yoda figures so I have to send her that pic. She is going to roll. I have never seen the one before.
I am a big fan of Yoda too! I loved the one that you posted! I had never seen it before.
Well, while we're on a Star Wars/Yoda theme, Here goes:
Hunka Hunka Burning Stormtrooper.
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4060/4719520381_baed18d290.jpg)
"The plank you be walking!"
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4064/4720170964_c74ba76cfa.jpg)
And I don't know why, but this one made me laugh . . .
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4017/4720170918_d89526d9d1.jpg)
I love the Viking one. Since I am a Viking reenactor I have loads of hilarious Viking funnies. Friends always find good ones of Hagar the Horrible and say Yup, this is Erik the Bear. (Thats me)
Seen Elvis trooper in person too, as well as Jack Sparrow trooper, Burger King trooper, Peace trooper, Sith Vixen hot lady trooper in bare midrift armor and many more. Good shot of all the Cinnamon Bunn Leia's too.
(http://cdn.mos.totalfilm.com/images/9/9-greatest-muppet-movie-parodies-190-75.jpg)
(http://postworthy.com/contributorimages/funny-animals-1.jpg)
(http://api.ning.com/files/V-nA93Yq3Kq63inaPRC-42usCXpSqXf-cRbysVjAghs_/AnimalFunny0004.jpg)
(http://smallgrouppastors.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/funny-animal-pic.jpg)
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/03/27/article-1165406-041C4D40000005DC-54_634x858.jpg)
Well.....since you brought animals into this my friend, how about these:
BATH DAY:
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/acat.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/Kitty-bath-on-FunFollcom-animal-cut.jpg)
AND FOR THAT BIG AAAAWWWWW MOMENT:
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/no-description-funny-animals-dog-fu.jpg)
(http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t1/MegaZeo/Motivational%20Posters/1180603421623.jpg)
(http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p280/zerglin/Motivational%20Posters/motivationalposter87.jpg)
(http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t1/MegaZeo/Motivational%20Posters/1206235771990.jpg)
(http://i118.photobucket.com/albums/o85/Rodekillz/Motivational%20Posters/image004.jpg)
I LOVE Z Movies!!!! Too funny!
Quote from: Wolf Man on June 21, 2010, 08:01:54 AM
Sith Vixen hot lady trooper in bare midrift armor and many more. Good shot of all the Cinnamon Bunn Leia's too.
Do share!!!!!!!!!!!
(http://funnyhot.net/pics/funny-animals/funny-animals3.jpg)
(http://www.thehumorblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/voices_in_my_head.jpg)
(http://www.thehumorblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/yoda_lookalike.jpg)
(http://img412.imageshack.us/img412/386/jawskitten2.jpg)
(http://img411.imageshack.us/img411/947/mariojawsbymostlymade56.jpg)
Jaws humor is always #1 in my book!
(http://tekniklr.com/wpblog/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/jaws-poster-copy.jpg)
(http://peelslowlynsee.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/jaws-mad-cover.jpg)
(http://outhouserag.typepad.com/outhouserag/images/Jaws.jpg)
(http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs51/f/2009/314/6/b/Anti_Twilight_Humor_by_terranada.jpg)
(http://www.zombiereportingcenter.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/zfp.jpg)
(http://somegosoftly.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/zombie_warn.jpg)
A Jaws Parody in Family Guy.
Family Guy - Jaws (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rS4IW0mFuQk#)
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1254/4729675770_896deff2c8_b.jpg)
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1088/4729029395_1e1b80cf5c.jpg)
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1008/4729675704_8db6ca1acc_b.jpg)
AWESOME!!!!!! Keep em' coming!!! I actually need a LOT of humor :) The zombie stuff is priceless! I really don't have any zombie toys or products at my house, but for some reason my grandson keeps bringing up the subject. I'm gonna show him that food pyramid next time he comes over.He'll crack up!
(http://passtheammo.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/zombie-repellent-shirt.jpg)
(http://zombiesandtoys.com/_wizardimages/zombie-manual-wallpaper.jpg)
(http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2411/2193614078_177552e675.jpg)
(http://goodbadandugly2.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/zombies.jpg)
(http://www.morehorror.com/images/zombie-survival-manual.jpg)
(http://www.keyourcars.com/wp-content/uploads/zombie_horde_poster_by_shinigamiblitz.jpg)
A little more Star Wars related:
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1358/4734374123_cff78b571f.jpg)
My Favorite Triple Feature ;D
(http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2676/3786300941_ef592106c5_o.jpg)
You gotta know what the client wants :P
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1409/4735027542_819381f888.jpg)
This one is a little wrong, but I still love it!
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4079/4734389055_dfd034d477.jpg)
A little wrong?! That is hilarious.
OK, I just could not resist - - -
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4138/4734492161_b29b065f86.jpg)
I like Dan Piraro's Bizarro comic strip...
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/bzLARRY06-18-10.jpg)
Mike
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/UnknownName.jpg)
Mike
I went through all the comics, but I'm still laughing at the Joker!
Wish I owned this shirt!!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/35_1.jpg)
Mike
I'll see your barber and raise you a psychiatrist:
;D
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4102/4737529798_b8abd2590a.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on June 26, 2010, 09:55:29 PM
I'll see your barber and raise you a psychiatrist:
;D
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4102/4737529798_b8abd2590a.jpg)
Available only in Japan.
Quote from: Fester on June 26, 2010, 01:53:32 AM
OK, I just could not resist - - -
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4138/4734492161_b29b065f86.jpg)
I just read the bottom of that, that is hilarious, it is a beer add? When I first looked at it I thought it was just a funny thing showing the monsters using the facilities.
Pink Floyd!! ha ha ha ha ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
That was a Heineken Beer ad from a couple of years ago. I must say, I perfer Elvira's beer promotions.
(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/129060702563381384.jpg) Not really humor, but the truth.
(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/celebrity-pictures-bela-lugosi-vampires-sparkle.jpg)
(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/celebrity-pictures-boris-karloff-science-projects.jpg)
(http://pix.motivatedphotos.com/2009/6/28/633817815008501135-BorisKarloff.jpg)
(http://pix.motivatedphotos.com/2009/7/8/633826561542043370-LonChaneyJr.jpg)
Love these pics, good find.
Love these SG!
(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/celebrity-pictures-thundercats-movie.jpg)
(http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/128865198225387238.jpg)
(http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/funny-pictures-cat-is-scared-of-his-reflection.jpg)
(http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/4/7/128835955849294002.jpg)
(http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/3/23/128823228959100642.jpg)
(http://img2.moonbuggy.org/imgstore/will-fight-giant-monsters-for-food.jpg)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIvJ0xCfDT0
Wow, that was disturbing. I may have a nightmare tonight where everyone has an extra large baby head. Aaahhhhh
Aw man, I needed a good laugh today! Love it all, but especially the manatee and Vincent Price!
Quote from: Illoman on June 26, 2010, 03:24:28 PM
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/UnknownName.jpg)
Mike
Now THAT"S FUNNY!!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Wife.jpg)
(http://pictures.streakr.com/images/motivational3/15.jpg)
On a slightly less gross note:
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4115/4825450531_35251966ed_b.jpg)
(http://0.tqn.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/P/C/rainforestman.jpg)
(http://pophangover.com/images/popmovies-2.jpg)
(http://www.starryhope.com/i/articles/insp_expendability.jpg)
Got this from a colleague. Steven Wright....obtuse humour and funny!
If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he is the famous erudite scientist who once said:
"I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."
His mind sees things differently than most of us do, to our amazement and amusement.
Here are some of his gems:
01 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
02 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
03 - Half the people you know are below average.
04 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
05 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
06 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
07 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
08 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
09 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend . . . but she left me before we met.
12 - Okay, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever . . . so far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
And
34 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
(http://imgfave.lg1x8z.simplecdn.net/image_cache/1263389806810215.jpeg)
Quote from: Most Horrible on July 28, 2010, 07:05:22 PM
(http://imgfave.lg1x8z.simplecdn.net/image_cache/1263389806810215.jpeg)
I like 8)
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4110/4840251270_39157c00f8_b.jpg)
Steven Wright is funny. I love his deadpan almost depressed delivery.
I was always partial to Emo Phillips.
Here are some of his better quotes:
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.
I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.' So we had a seance and Jack Ruby says, 'Hello!'
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.
I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming. They don't know I'm only using blanks.
I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them.
I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.
I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
People always ask me, "Where were you when Kennedy was shot?" Well, I don't have an alibi.
Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day.
Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.
Well, my brother says Hello. So, hooray for speech therapy.
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas.
Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Always remember the last words of my grandfather, who said: "A truck!"
People come up to me... concerned... that I'll reproduce.
When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!"
One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun..
I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.
I ran three miles today... finally I said, "Lady, take your purse.
When I was ten, my family moved to Downer's Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them.
People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?"
Great stuff, Fester! Thanks for sharing!!
(http://lolsnaps.com/upload_images/real/507.jpg)
That's *hilarious*!!!!
Mike
Scatter...you the man..er primate. :D
(http://www.hilarious-pictures.com/files/picture/50394045.jpg)
lol I love this pic!
(http://i592.photobucket.com/albums/tt2/jmvolina/those-were-the-droids-i-was-looking-for.jpg)
Quote from: BlackLagoon on July 30, 2010, 08:35:44 PM
lol I love this pic!
(http://i592.photobucket.com/albums/tt2/jmvolina/those-were-the-droids-i-was-looking-for.jpg)
lol
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4133/4848573002_70a0f5d51b.jpg)
(http://pics.livejournal.com/hipsterdad/pic/00246056)
Fester- I love that Dentist comic so much-I wanted to send it to my daughter, so I right clicked and it said save as picture. Hopefully, I can print it out or figure a way to send it to her. I have zero computer skills!
This just in: Charlotte figured out how to send funny comic to daughter! I saved it and found it and uploaded it on her Facebook as a message. Victory!!! Keep the comics coming everyone!
Its whats for supper:
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4095/4851691937_93ea2f20a8_b.jpg)
Those comics are great! I wonder how many people will get the jole about the Dagwood sandwiches.
Fester, my man! You're an oldie but goodie just like me!
Quote from: ChattyLMS on August 02, 2010, 11:10:31 AM
Those comics are great! I wonder how many people will get the jole about the Dagwood sandwiches.
Fester, my man! You're an oldie but goodie just like me!
When Mom is right, she's right!
used to love to down some Dagwood sandwiches.....and Mom would say, enjoy it while you can, that will all catch up to ya one day.
Who Knew?! Mom was right!
Quote from: ChattyLMS on August 02, 2010, 11:10:31 AM
You're an oldie but goodie just like me!
I'm pretty sure I've got a few more miles on the odometer than you. But we do seem to have similar points of reference.
Speaking about age:
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4100/4854533658_7a7cae663f_b.jpg)
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4140/4853914867_cc84e1ba9a.jpg)
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/Truth.jpg)
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/mp-rock-bottom.jpg)
This one is way too true!
(http://a.imageshack.us/img192/4496/largeimagerl100802.gif)
Fester..so true. Also, they should make one that says- "End of Summer? It was just Memorial Day a few minutes ago". I hate this time flying by business!
QuoteI'm pretty sure I've got a few more miles on the odometer than you. But we do seem to have similar points of reference
Yes we do have similar points of reference. That's because my odometer is really not that far behind yours.
(http://xmb.stuffucanuse.com/xmb/image.php?&aid=1896&penguins.jpg)
(http://xmb.stuffucanuse.com/xmb/image.php?&aid=2164&farting-in-wetsuit.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w280/sakura-li/funny%20pics/funny.jpg)
(http://www.celebrityodor.com/)
Thanks, Scatter! I just came in from doing yard work, so I thought nothing could be funny......but I was wrong! Here at the House of Charp, all fart jokes are funny!
Not sure I'd order the baby back ribs, though.
(http://a.imageshack.us/img19/717/e9496b4a036942ccb94addb.jpg)
That's a great idea for a sign- I'm gonna use it over my Halloween graveyard area!
Hey Scatter, Pen-gu-ins is prac-a-tlc-ally chickens.
Quote from: Scatter on August 08, 2010, 07:45:41 AM
(http://xmb.stuffucanuse.com/xmb/image.php?&aid=2164&farting-in-wetsuit.jpg)
I showed this one to Kat my wife and she almost peed herself. FUN-NEE! This will be floating around her work on Monday.
(http://a.imageshack.us/img822/3212/mgg1101.gif)
Hey, according to the little counter on the top by my name, I have been logged in a total of ten days. Time flies. Good thing it was not all at once.
(//) (http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/144/draculaeatspez.jpg)
(http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/144/draculaeatspez.jpg)
Love that Pez dispenser- creeper! Fester- you're my hero! I sent that vampire dentist comic to my daughter, and she's using it as her Facebook profile picture and I ended up looking cool! Eventually I'll have to reveal UMA as my source, but it feels good to be a "cool Mom" for the first time in my life :)
charp13:
You can remain closeted at the UMA for some time to come.
Just credit the source of the cartoon to its creator, Mike Peters, who draws Mother Goose and Grimm
http://www.grimmy.com/index.htm (http://www.grimmy.com/index.htm)
Just look around on his site. Plenty of good stuff.
Thanks Fester, I'll comment on her FB and tell her to check out Mike Peters' work! Maybe he has more dentist humor she can laugh about :)
I can relate. I have the same problem.
(http://a.imageshack.us/img132/1883/largeimagecrspe100811.gif)
The wife emailed this one to me
Darth Vader Thriller (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrPEr3UOZOY&feature=email#)
Quote from: Scatter on August 08, 2010, 07:44:21 AM
(http://xmb.stuffucanuse.com/xmb/image.php?&aid=1896&penguins.jpg)
Yes, I realize that this is just a joke item, but penguins are from the southern polar region and polar bears are from the northern polar region. Except in a zoo, they never meet. Just providing some education services in case anyone has a kid working on school project in the coming year.
Professor Rob
Quote from: Opera Ghost on August 12, 2010, 12:52:41 PM
The wife emailed this one to me
Darth Vader Thriller (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrPEr3UOZOY&feature=email#)
HA!! That's pretty cool!!
Quote from: monsterphile on August 12, 2010, 02:37:58 PM
Yes, I realize that this is just a joke item, but penguins are from the southern polar region and polar bears are from the northern polar region. Except in a zoo, they never meet. Just providing some education services in case anyone has a kid working on school project in the coming year.
Professor Rob
Unless they are in a zoo.
Contrarian Scatter
;)
# Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
Do not walk beside me, either; just #$!(*at*)! off and leave me alone.
# The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire.
# It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
# Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
# No one is listening until you make a mistake.
# Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
# Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
# It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
# It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
# If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
# Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
# If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
# Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat & drink beer all day.
# If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
# If you drink, don't park; accidents cause people.
# Some days you are the bug, some days you are the windshield.
# The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
# Duct tape is like the force; it has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
(http://a.imageshack.us/img408/9205/largeimage6dc8b6ab92dce.gif)
maybe a little more dental humor. . . .
(http://a.imageshack.us/img842/9333/greatestever.jpg)
For some reason, Aunt Louise decided she was not fond of the Lutefisk-Habanero-Curry hot dish I brought to the family reunion picnic.
(http://izismile.com/img/img3/20100813/640/daily_picdump_M1HQX_640_55.jpg)
(http://izismile.com/img/img3/20100813/640/daily_picdump_5pgWd_640_79.jpg)
QuoteYes, I realize that this is just a joke item, but penguins are from the southern polar region and polar bears are from the northern polar region. Except in a zoo, they never meet. Just providing some education services in case anyone has a kid working on school project in the coming year.
Pen gu wins is prac tic ally chickens
An old man goes to see his physician, and the doctor asks the man how he's been doing. The man replies he's been fine, and, in fact, the good Lord has been looking out for him, even turning on the light in the bathroom when he goes into pee early in the morning. The doctor thinks about this for a minute, excuses himself, and goes into the waiting room to speak to his wife....after explaining the situation to his wife, she replies "Well, I wouldn't worry about it....on the other hand, it DOES explain who's been peeing in the refrigerator".....
bada bing, badda boom....
Bizarro Jeff
(http://a.imageshack.us/img826/3900/mgg0829.gif)
Doggie Obedience School Graduate....
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/dogobedienceschoolgrad.jpg)
Quote from: Illoman on August 29, 2010, 04:06:49 PM
Doggie Obedience School Graduate....
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/dogobedienceschoolgrad.jpg)
If only ONE of my dogs would be so inclined...
(http://kecute.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/headless-horseman.jpg)
Quote from: Dr.Teufel Geist on September 04, 2010, 03:44:09 AM
(http://kecute.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/headless-horseman.jpg)
HOLY CRAP! I need one of those for my useless dog!!
Those are hilarious! I gues the dog will certainly learn not to poop in his neighbor's yard!
(http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/3193/funnypicturesyourchildw.jpg)
Quote from: The Creeper on September 06, 2010, 02:06:05 PM
(http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/3193/funnypicturesyourchildw.jpg)
ROTFLMAO!
This one cracks me up! The look on his face! ;D
(http://img838.imageshack.us/img838/6681/nipples.jpg)
Quote from: The Creeper on September 08, 2010, 03:19:48 PM
This one cracks me up! The look on his face! ;D
(http://img838.imageshack.us/img838/6681/nipples.jpg)
Poor Rowan!
Divorce is seldom a laughing matter, but courtesy of my self-proclaimed Red-neck Cousin, Donna in NC, these are hilarious expressions to celebrate the end of a marriage
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/Cake1.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake2.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake3.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake4.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake5.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake6.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake7.jpg)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/cake8.jpg)
Scatter and UP......
...can you hear me now?
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/kongcell.jpg)
Sorry for the sloppy photo
(http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/5516/mgg1226.gif)
Quote from: Opera Ghost on December 27, 2010, 07:42:02 PM
Scatter and UP......
...can you hear me now?
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/kongcell.jpg)
Sorry for the sloppy photo
HA!! ;D
OG! Those pictures are hilarious!! When is the reception?
(http://img443.imageshack.us/img443/9215/largeimagetas101223.gif)
Here is a cleaner copy . . .
(http://img812.imageshack.us/img812/7424/largeimagecrspe101216.gif)
Thanks Fester! I love this subject :) I've already saved the dentist comic and I'm gonna email it to my creepy dentist-daughter! Via- Facebook :)
Quote from: Fester on December 28, 2010, 01:16:06 AM
(http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/5516/mgg1226.gif)
Ummm--what is Martian Manhunter supposed to wear his shorts inside
of?
I'm not so sure I want to know :) maybe they're stick on shorts or a decal haha! My grandson will get a good laugh out of that comic!
Dentist cartoon coming right up!
(http://img269.imageshack.us/img269/9064/largeimagecrstr101223.gif)
I dunno, for some reason, this one hit me just right . . .
(http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/9585/mgg1230.gif)
Niiiice! Fester, thanks for the caveman comic! My daughter has never seen any of these, so they are sure to delight her. :)
(http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/3931/largeimageadb311fddd63c.gif)
Charpie!
Did your daughter like the comic?
Does she put lots of novacaine in your gums so you slobber for several hours?
Oh yeah! She loves that stuff because she's never seen any of it before! We never got the newspaper when she was young, I only bought comic books for my kids so they would read SOMETHING! I told them I didn't care what they read as long as they read for pleasure. :) But the newspaper was a downer, so we missed all the comic pages. Strangely enough, now that my daughter is a grown up, she subscribes to the Sunday paper. Weird! They always do the opposite of their parents-kids these days...... And no, she does not provide me with novocaine-EEK! She mostly does implants and veneers at the fancy place she works at. They are all into asthetic stuff over there. I fear one day she will get a good look at me in the daylight and start suggesting botox or new choppers! haha
Do you get a discount?
The veneer thing worries me . . . all I can imagine is mahogany or curly maple.
Probably because Dad taught wood shop for so many years!
Hahaha! :) I let her clean my teeth once when she was in dental school and it was a BLOODBATH!! She was just learning to use those old-timey xrays, and she kept poking the inside of my mouth. I was just pretending that it bothered me and I kept saying that my socks were fiiling up with blood- haha! She got so mad at me, but she's over it now (hopefully)! I'm sure if I ever want fancy teeth she'll gimme some! But she's a real laid back kid (lady) so she puts up with me. I really never thought about the veneer jokes I could use>>>>>> I'm getting some great material from you! Let's see- there's the varnish/polyurethane jokes, sanding jokes, etc! Thanks Fester!
(http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/9665/largeimage4f9a7a48b2af4.gif)
Fester- You are the master!!! That one made me choke on some water I was sipping daintily (I was gulping)! I have actually seen toenails like that on my black bathroom rugs! A certain person of the spousal persuasion, that lives in the same house as I do, leaves giant plastic looking toenail clippings scattered around like bread crumbs! And then I scream in horror......and he picks them up. Wow......I know TMI! But I had to let you know how funny it is when the toenails are somewhere else, other than my floor. :)
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/jack.jpg)
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/cursedmummy.jpg)
Recent disaster:
Low flying aircraft hits four houses!
Oh! The Humanity!
(http://img859.imageshack.us/img859/4779/crashh.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on March 13, 2011, 01:39:58 PM
Recent disaster:
Low flying aircraft hits four houses!
Oh! The Humanity!
(http://img859.imageshack.us/img859/4779/crashh.jpg)
Classic!!
Puns for Educated Minds
1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'
13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
17. A backward poet writes inverse.
18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine .
21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'
23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'
26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
A man is sitting at home on the verandah with his wife and he says, "I love you."
She asks, "Is that you or the beer talking?"
He replies, "It's me............. talking to the beer."
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, they fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes The Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabi, look towards sky, what you see?"
The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute, then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?
Tonto is silent for a moment, then says, "Kemo Sabi,
you dumb ass. It tell me someone stolen tent."
(http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/3/27/128826882389632386.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/My%20Collection/IMG_6401.jpg)
TV Good!!!!
The things you see in public these days!
(http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/725/largeimagetas110319.gif)
Hunting on the Jersey Shore . . .
(http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/5087/bridgeandtunneltrap.jpg)
One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.
The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!"
Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly,
"Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.
"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.
The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.
The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...
"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"
In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that plastic
bags weren't good for the environment. The woman apologized to her and
explained, "We didn't have the green thing back in my day."
That's right, they didn't have the green thing in her day. Back then,
they returned their milk bottles, Coke bottles and beer bottles to the
store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized
and refilled, using the same bottles over and over. So they really were
recycled. But they didn't have the green thing back her day.
In her day, they walked up stairs, because they didn't have an escalator
in every store and office building. They walked to the grocery store and
didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time they had to go two
blocks. But she's right. They didn't have the green thing in her day.
Back then, they washed the baby's diapers because they didn't have the
throw-away kind. They dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling
machine burning up 220 volts "wind and solar power" really did dry the
clothes. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters,
not always brand-new clothing. But that old lady is right, they didn't
have the green thing back in her day.
Back then, they had one TV, or radio, in the house not a TV in every
room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a pizza dish, not a
screen the size of the state of Montana . In the kitchen, they blended
and stirred by hand because they didn't have electric machines to do
everything for you. When they packaged a fragile item to send in the
mail, they used wadded up newspaper to cushion it, not styrofoam or
plastic bubble wrap.
Back then, they didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut
the lawn. They used a push mower that ran on human power. They exercised
by working so they didn't need to go to a health club to run on
treadmills that operate on electricity. But she's right, they didn't
have the green thing back then.
They drank from a fountain when they were thirsty, instead of using a
cup or a plastic bottle every time they had a drink of water. They
refilled pens with ink, instead of buying a new pen, and they replaced
the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor
just because the blade got dull. But they didn't have the green thing back then.
Back then, people took the streetcar and kids rode their bikes to school
or rode the school bus, instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour
taxi service. They had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire
bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And they didn't need a computerized
gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in
space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.
But that old lady is right. They didn't have the green thing back in her
day.
;)
^^^ ;D
I rec'd this in my email today ....
The following is a customer complaint to the Irish Railway Company.
Gentlemen,
I have been riding your trains daily for the last two years,
and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every
day. I am tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a
14 mile trip. I think the transportation system is worse
than that enjoyed by people 2,000 years ago.
Yours truly,
Patrick Finnegan
Dear Mr. Finnegan,
We received your letter with reference to the shortcomings
of our service and believe you are somewhat confused in your
history. The only mode of transportation 2,000 years ago was
by foot.
Sincerely,
Irish Railway Company
Gentlemen,
I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are the ones
who are confused in your history. If you will refer to the
Bible and the Book of David, 9th Chapter, you will find that
Balaam rode to town on his ass.
That, gentlemen, is something I have not been able to do on
your train in the last two years!
Yours truly,
Patrick Finnegan.
A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, 'What is this Father?'
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is.'
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number... and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.
The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son.....'Go get your Mother, boy.'
;D
(http://www.savesamoa.org/assets/images/Skunks_with_cat.jpg)
If Scary Movies Were Real! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxMHWP7I8os#ws)
OUTER LIMITS MEETS BARNEY FIFE
! Video not found (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZVJoFl0LL8&feature=feed#)
:)
That was a great mash-up!
This is only 30 seconds long, but it cracks me up!
Robert De Niro's Frankenstein - by Caliendo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSIFqGJD5ow#)
If I ran the mint:
(http://img683.imageshack.us/img683/9136/b6ab7f328fac4240ba2481c.jpg)
(http://img848.imageshack.us/img848/9811/largeimagecrspe110427.jpg)
HA!
Okay this thread has done my cynical blackened heart good. Hilarious!
(http://img405.imageshack.us/img405/8046/largeimagea665187a9c062.gif)
(http://img703.imageshack.us/img703/1416/largeimagecrstr110402.gif)
(http://funpics.classicfun.ws/var/resizes/Funpics/Evil_Bono.jpg?m=1257600164)
HA! Love it!!
Fester!!! I love it!! I just recently explained "the filter" to my grandson in great detail!! So this really had me laughing!!! The Filter Rules!!!! I even told him that you can use it in medical situations, like when you're getting stitches in your toe and you're curious but don't want to full-on look at it! Use the filter!! :)
Scatter- I didn't know where that story was going, until the last line! Super Funny!
The filter has served me well over the years.
It helped me survive Sleepless in Seattle and every Hugh Grant romance movie my wife has dragged home.
Teasing the Dawg . . .
Ultimate Dog Tease (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw#)
Fester, that was *awesome*!!! I love dogs!
Quote from: Scatter on May 01, 2011, 06:44:10 PM
(http://funpics.classicfun.ws/var/resizes/Funpics/Evil_Bono.jpg?m=1257600164)
I love it too!
;D
Quote from: Fester on May 02, 2011, 05:05:06 PMTeasing the Dawg . . .
Just have to say that's one of the funniest things I've seen in years. Found it on Youtube and sent it to a bunch of friends. Thanks for sharing that with us. :)
I posted a bunch of these on my facebook page. Especially the Twilight ones. My cousin likes Twilight and it's my sworn duty to annoy her whenever I can.
Ten Reasons To Go To Work Naked
1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!"
2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan.
3. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."
4. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.
5. You want to see if it's like the dream.
6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.
7. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.
8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.
9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.
10. No one steals your chair.
Politicians and diapers need to be changed often.
Quote from: Fester on May 10, 2011, 01:15:29 AM
Ten Reasons To Go To Work Naked
1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!"
2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan.
3. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."
4. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.
5. You want to see if it's like the dream.
6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.
7. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.
8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.
9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.
10. No one steals your chair.
Classic!!
Quote from: CreepysFan on May 11, 2011, 03:33:35 PM
Politicians and diapers need to be changed often.
And for the same reason.
I've always been confused why the word service is used with these agencies :
Customer Service
Civil Service
U.S. Postal Service
Telephone Service
Cable TV Service
Internal Revenue Service
That is not what I thought service meant.
Today I overheard two farmers talking about how one of them hired a bull to SERVICE his cows
NOW I understand what all these agencies are doing to us.
Quote from: CreepysFan on May 11, 2011, 03:44:12 PM
I've always been confused why the word service is used with these agencies :
Customer Service
Civil Service
U.S. Postal Service
Telephone Service
Cable TV Service
Internal Revenue Service
That is not what I thought service meant.
Today I overheard two farmers talking about how one of them hired a bull to SERVICE his cows
NOW I understand what all these agencies are doing to us.
DING DING DING DING!!!!
Oh hell yes! especially the post office. I still have a plush Spuds Mackenzie dog, one just like the one I had and loved as a kid, in post office limbo. I ordered the dog several years ago. It is clearly lost and despite scouring the net I have yet to see another like it. Now if I order something I'll pay extra to make sure it is NOT sent by the post office.
A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home.
On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home.
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?' The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.' The old lady suggested, 'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket.
Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?' 'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time. The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, 'I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?' The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?' The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens.
The recession has hit everybody really hard...
My neighbour got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of
pennies while she danced.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call
them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America .
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their
children's names.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico ..
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!
The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by
the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs,
my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the
Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
;D
Quote from: Illoman on May 11, 2011, 05:54:44 PM
A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home.
On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home.
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?' The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.' The old lady suggested, 'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket.
Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?' 'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time. The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, 'I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?' The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?' The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens.
Good one!
;D
This is neat:
Ultimate Dog Tease (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw#)
8)
Quote from: Hepcat on May 12, 2011, 12:01:35 PM
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
This definitely belongs on a monster board. So close to the truth it's scary.
(http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/8205/xmuppetsbyrahzzahd3gih9.jpg)
I'd watch that! 8)
(http://img805.imageshack.us/img805/9505/tumblrljwfbqaezo1qh5ts3.jpg)
This is why you never see a light saber in one of Shakespeare's plays.
Quote from: Fester on May 24, 2011, 12:51:39 AM
(http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/8205/xmuppetsbyrahzzahd3gih9.jpg)
X-MUPPETS
They so need to do this.
Oh man, that Muppet stuff is KILLER LOL!!!
Inspirational!!!
Kid Gives Speech After Learning To Ride A Bike (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6ybwW8jqjs#ws)
Moonshadow! That's hilarious! My daughter just showed me this video last night! Too funny!!!
That's great! And I could use this today!
This is one reason I stay away from facebook.
(Ever so slightly NSFW)
Grandma Got a Facebook (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pb19JwNhfGo#ws)
You've heard this music in dozens of movies. Especially anything remotely Medieval . . .
Ever wonder what they were singing?
Wonder no More:
Oh Four Tuna (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scCTty3KDLk#)
http://www.noob.us/humor/you-will-never-guess-what-this-ad-is-about/ (http://www.noob.us/humor/you-will-never-guess-what-this-ad-is-about/)
Watch/discus among yourselves....
Bizarro Jeff
Buy, Buy American Pie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vq8wbXAR4ZQ#ws)
(http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/6952/122810.jpg)
(http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/5576/tumblrldi36ofjue1qzab0n.gif)
Good ones, Dave! ;D
Fester, you are the best! I love the Zombie Twister comic! If only playing Twister were that easy......no pulled groin muscles. :)
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/popeye.jpg)
Quote from: CreepysFan on June 22, 2011, 04:03:42 PM
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/popeye.jpg)
AWESOME!!
And POPEYE brand canned Spinach is still available at your local grocery stores.
At least, it is here in Spokanistan! ;)
Quote from: Fester on June 23, 2011, 12:28:59 AM
And POPEYE brand canned Spinach is still available at your local grocery stores.
At least, it is here in Spokanistan! ;)
Tell me you're not pulling my leg Dave.
QuoteTell me you're not pulling my leg Dave.
It's available here in West Kentucky and Tennessee...I see it all the time.
Quote from: Wolf Man on June 19, 2010, 05:30:33 AM
I wanted to start this because, well......sometimes we just need a little humor in our lives. Feel free to add your own cartoons or humorous anticdotes. Enjoy
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/mp14.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/unemploymentgm8.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/poster74496920.jpg)
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/diplomacy.jpg)
http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/bbb2da13e8.jpg (http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/bbb2da13e8.jpg)
If that last one is too harsh for language I will delete it. Sorry, that is how it came but still funny.
NOTE: The last one has the f-bomb in it. If you want to see it, just click the link. - Rob
Mary Had A Little Lamb, This Lamb Was Black As Soot, And Every Where This Little Lamb Went, Itssootyfootheput.
Quote from: RICKH on June 24, 2011, 08:43:07 PM
It's available here in West Kentucky and Tennessee...I see it all the time.
OUTSTANDING!! I gotta get me one of those!
Quote from: Bizarro Jeff on June 06, 2011, 04:52:50 PM
http://www.noob.us/humor/you-will-never-guess-what-this-ad-is-about/ (http://www.noob.us/humor/you-will-never-guess-what-this-ad-is-about/)
Watch/discus among yourselves....
Bizarro Jeff
Always Wondered, Now I Know.
Quote from: Scatter on June 24, 2011, 06:14:22 PM
Tell me you're not pulling my leg Dave.
It is real.
Want a can?
You don't have it in Florida ? Popeye's the only brand of Spinach we buy.
Nope, no Popeye's spinch in Florida. At least not here. Appreciate the offer Dave, but is it's everywhere it's not really more than a can of spinach. But still pretty cool!
True Love.....
This guy was sitting at home alone when he hears a knock at the door.
There were two sheriffs there.
He asked them "Is there a problem?"
One of the sheriffs asked if he was married and the man says "yes."
The sheriff asks if he could see a picture of his wife.
The guy says "sure" and shows him a picture of his wife.
The sheriff says, "I'm sorry sir, but it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
The guy says, "I know, but she has a great personality, and she's a good cook too."
A young, blond girl, in her late teens, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy woman" and she started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of a lovely house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint the porch" he said. "How much will you charge me?"
Delighted, the girl quickly responded, "How about $50?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and brushes and everything she would need were in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes ALL the way around the house?"
"That's a bit cynical, isn't it?" he responded.
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb-blonde jokes."
A few hours later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already??" the startled husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I even had paint left over, so I gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her along with a $10 tip.
"Thank you," the blonde said, "...and, by the way...it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus."
Mike - both of those were hysterical!
Thanks, UP!! I hardly ever get humor that's worth passing along. Both those arrived in my inbox the same day!
My husband just about fell out of his chair when I read him the "porch" joke! Good stuff Mike! ;D
(http://img88.imageshack.us/img88/9392/061011.jpg)
(http://img580.imageshack.us/img580/73/bizarro20110609small.gif)
Mike and Dave, those are all classics!!
Hey - those are my SOCKS!
An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Pop, Don't dig up that garden. That's where the bodies are buried.
Love, Vinnie
At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.
That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Pop, Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you, Vinnie
(http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/2339/07d101b08583012ee3c4001.gif)
Amen, Nelson!
(http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/1282/063011.jpg)
So wrong So funny
(http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/543/07d101b08583012ee3c4001.gif/)
Funny Heineken Beer Monster Commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBGlMQJ7Xjk#)
That's one clever Creatu -I mean, monster.
That comercial is the bomb!
That was too good. Thanks for posting that. ;D
That has to be one of the GREATEST commercials ever. FANTASTIC.
(http://img847.imageshack.us/img847/733/demotivationalposterszo.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/847/demotivationalposterszo.jpg/)
(http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20110713.gif)
http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=2305 (http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=2305)
SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it
What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.
What do lawyers use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
20 kgs.
What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
What's the difference between a porcupine and a police car?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.
What's the difference between an Australian zoo and an English zoo?
An Australian zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with - a recipe.
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell "BINGO"!
What's the difference between a northern USA fairytale and a southern USA fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time...." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this crap...."
Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides.
:D
Golfing with Unknown Primate?
This guy takes a gorilla out golfing. At the first tee the gorilla says, "So what am I supposed to do?" The guy says, "You see that green area about 400 yards from here? You're supposed to hit the ball onto that." So the gorilla takes a club and whacks the ball and it soars up into the sky and drops down neatly on the green. The guy tees off and makes about 150 yards, so he hits an iron shot and then another iron shot and finally they arrive at the green. The gorilla says, "What do I do now?" The guy says, "Now you hit it into that cup." The gorilla says, "Why didn't you tell me that back there?"
(http://img703.imageshack.us/img703/466/tumblrlngj1afgk11qloemm.jpg)
HAGAR RULES!
I'm amazed that nobody has made a Hagar movie. Back when they did the Flintstones I would have bet money that Hagar would be next.
Quote from: Gillfan on July 25, 2011, 03:45:28 PM
I'm amazed that nobody has made a Hagar movie. Back when they did the Flintstones I would have bet money that Hagar would be next.
I think if Hagar had been an animated series, someone might have tried. But being a daily newspaper strip might have made it a harder sell.
Either live action like the
Flintstones or CG like
Over the Hedge would be fine--as long as there is a good story.
No comment . . .
(http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/6894/tas110801.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/718/tas110801.gif/)
Fester, that's *great*!!!
Fester- You are the best! I am sharing that comic with my whole family :)
(http://img42.imageshack.us/img42/8369/tas110807.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/42/tas110807.gif/)
Could have been worse.
Could have been the Mariners . . .
http://www.videobash.com/video_show/hot-girls-with-lightsabers-799?utm_source=2leep&utm_medium=PT&utm_campaign=2leep (http://www.videobash.com/video_show/hot-girls-with-lightsabers-799?utm_source=2leep&utm_medium=PT&utm_campaign=2leep)
isn't this every thinking man's fantasy?
Bizarro Jeff
(http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/5812/tas110818.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/853/tas110818.gif/)
Wash day for The Mummy - ;D!!
I've been messing around with some ideas for a crypto/monster book of cartoons. Here's one of them...
(http://i363.photobucket.com/albums/oo79/TheUnknownPrimate/MONSTER%20ART/img138.jpg)
That is fantastic UP, humorous and slightly twisted. ;D
Great Cartoon UP!
(http://img710.imageshack.us/img710/3664/crstr110906.gif)
(http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/4441/850230608.jpg)
(http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/110/103110.jpg)
Fester- You have the most active funny bone ever!! I love all your comic- finds :) And I've sent so many of them to my family members, so I thank you!
UP- How did I miss your comic??? It is fantastic, Mark!!! I really need to know what is going to happen next! Agghhhhhhhhh!! I can't wait! Cliffhangers kill me......not literally :)
Quote from: Unknown Primate on September 07, 2011, 12:18:14 AM
I've been messing around with some ideas for a crypto/monster book of cartoons. Here's one of them...
(http://i363.photobucket.com/albums/oo79/TheUnknownPrimate/MONSTER%20ART/img138.jpg)
Oh man!! I love that!! LOLOLOL!!!
Quote from: Scatter on September 09, 2011, 05:10:41 PM
Oh man!! I love that!! LOLOLOL!!!
Me, too! The artwork is great!!
UP that comic is great! Fester, those comics had me snickering-great stuff.
here's why I never let Franky pick the DVD to watch. "Jayne GOOD!"
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/My%20Collection/IMG_6401.jpg)
Quote from: Unknown Primate on September 07, 2011, 12:18:14 AM
I've been messing around with some ideas for a crypto/monster book of cartoons. Here's one of them...
(http://i363.photobucket.com/albums/oo79/TheUnknownPrimate/MONSTER%20ART/img138.jpg)
More! MORE!!!!
(http://www.4funnies.com/img/funny_pictures/evel_knievel_roller_coster.jpg)
HA! Evel was the GREATEST!
(http://img11.hostingpics.net/pics/703000Roomwithaview.jpg)
(http://img851.imageshack.us/img851/2377/20090826ccxericviking.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/851/20090826ccxericviking.png/)
Freakin' hilarious, Dave!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Books.jpg)
My daughter sent me this one....
;D ;D ;D
Quote from: Illoman on September 22, 2011, 02:20:20 PM
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Books.jpg)
My daughter sent me this one....
Holy crap Mike, I never watched that abomination before last night. ITunes had a free video of the "best of" Jersey Whores, and I have to say that if that steaming pile of excrement is the "best of" ANYTHING, our culture is in its death throes.
When did superficiality, ignorance, gutter morality, and walking sexual petri dishes become entertainment? :P
Quote from: Scatter on September 22, 2011, 05:35:24 PM
Holy crap Mike, I never watched that abomination before last night. ITunes had a free video of the "best of" Jersey Whores, and I have to say that if that steaming pile of excrement is the "best of" ANYTHING, our culture is in its death throes.
When did superficiality, ignorance, gutter morality, and walking sexual petri dishes become entertainment? :P
Scatter, you are going to force me onto my soapbox! My kids and I argue endlessly about today's "celebrities". Back in the day, you had to actually *do* something to be considered a celebrity. You had to have some kind of talent, whether it be in acting, sports, music, art, whatever. Nowadays you have to just be drunk and offensive, get on teevee and *bam*, you're a celebrity!! The fact that someone like Snookie, granted I know little about her, except that she is on an MTV reality show and is usually a foul mouthed, drunken buffoon, and somehow she's entitled to get 30 grand for giving a speech!! What the hell could someone like her have to say that's worth 30 grand? What insights could she give us to better society, besides "Don't be like me"?
You are right, society is in it's death throes, and if this is a glimpse into the future, you can have it. Back in the day, Jimmy Stewart, Clark Gable and other "stars" had their asses in airplanes, dropping bombs on our enemies. Today, Jane Fonda and Sean Penn coddle up to the enemy!!! It really makes me sick! Why is Kim Kardasian a celebrity? Why is Paris Hilton a celebrity? Good Lord save us from ourselves!!!
Sorry, but Scatter made me do it.... ;)
My brother just sent me this which had me crying. Oprah is another of today's culture folks I really can't take:
http://www.break.com/index/yelling-oprah-vs-yelling-goat-2129911 (http://www.break.com/index/yelling-oprah-vs-yelling-goat-2129911)
Quote from: Illoman on September 22, 2011, 06:29:16 PM
Scatter, you are going to force me onto my soapbox! My kids and I argue endlessly about today's "celebrities". Back in the day, you had to actually *do* something to be considered a celebrity. You had to have some kind of talent, whether it be in acting, sports, music, art, whatever. Nowadays you have to just be drunk and offensive, get on teevee and *bam*, you're a celebrity!! The fact that someone like Snookie, granted I know little about her, except that she is on an MTV reality show and is usually a foul mouthed, drunken buffoon, and somehow she's entitled to get 30 grand for giving a speech!! What the hell could someone like her have to say that's worth 30 grand? What insights could she give us to better society, besides "Don't be like me"?
You are right, society is in it's death throes, and if this is a glimpse into the future, you can have it. Back in the day, Jimmy Stewart, Clark Gable and other "stars" had their asses in airplanes, dropping bombs on our enemies. Today, Jane Fonda and Sean Penn coddle up to the enemy!!! It really makes me sick! Why is Kim Kardasian a celebrity? Why is Paris Hilton a celebrity? Good Lord save us from ourselves!!!
Sorry, but Scatter made me do it.... ;)
Yup I made you do it. And I agree 100%. That's why we stick to OLD Hollywood at Castle Scatter!!
Quote from: Illoman on September 22, 2011, 06:33:24 PM
My brother just sent me this which had me crying. Oprah is another of today's culture folks I really can't take:
http://www.break.com/index/yelling-oprah-vs-yelling-goat-2129911 (http://www.break.com/index/yelling-oprah-vs-yelling-goat-2129911)
LMAO!! I can't STAND The Oprah.
Quote from: Scatter on September 22, 2011, 06:35:08 PM
LMAO!! I can't STAND The Oprah.
I completely lost all respect for the woman, when she had the parents of that 16 year old boy who had been kidnapped by a neighbor and held hostage for a period of time. Oprah looked them straight in the face and said "Okay, I'm going to go there. Was he sexually abused?" Most reporters had the decency to *not* ask the parents this. Not the Oprah. And the sad thing was, the folks told what happened. It's none of Oprah's or our damn business. Do you think that boy wants America to know he was molested? Those parents need some serious help if they don't care for that boy more than that. Oprah should be ashamed....
Speaking of JERSEY SHORE, I was at the gym the other day, and these three young dudes were going on & on about the "buff" guys on JERSEY SHORE and their workouts and how awesome they were. They talked about the chicks, too, but I kept thinking how "gym talk" has changed over the years. Used to be about pro footballers, powerlifters and hot barbarian babes. Now, it's about something or somebody called "The Situation"? What the heck?
You're really better off NOT asking, UP...If we all ignore it maybe it will go away!
Quote from: Gasport on September 22, 2011, 11:35:58 PM
You're really better off NOT asking, UP...If we all ignore it maybe it will go away!
AMEN!!!!!
Quote from: Illoman on September 22, 2011, 06:29:16 PM
Scatter, you are going to force me onto my soapbox! My kids and I argue endlessly about today's "celebrities". Back in the day, you had to actually *do* something to be considered a celebrity. You had to have some kind of talent, whether it be in acting, sports, music, art, whatever. Nowadays you have to just be drunk and offensive, get on teevee and *bam*, you're a celebrity!! The fact that someone like Snookie, granted I know little about her, except that she is on an MTV reality show and is usually a foul mouthed, drunken buffoon, and somehow she's entitled to get 30 grand for giving a speech!! What the hell could someone like her have to say that's worth 30 grand? What insights could she give us to better society, besides "Don't be like me"?
You are right, society is in it's death throes, and if this is a glimpse into the future, you can have it. Back in the day, Jimmy Stewart, Clark Gable and other "stars" had their asses in airplanes, dropping bombs on our enemies. Today, Jane Fonda and Sean Penn coddle up to the enemy!!! It really makes me sick! Why is Kim Kardasian a celebrity? Why is Paris Hilton a celebrity? Good Lord save us from ourselves!!!
Sorry, but Scatter made me do it.... ;)
Man, Mike, you pegged it! You have to wonder about a society that elevates skanks and morons to celebrity status. I'll take the dubious celebrities of my youth, like just about everyone on Match Game, over these losers!!
I really appreciate the comments of the folks who replied to my rant. Nice to know there's some modicum of sane folks left!
Quote from: Illoman on September 23, 2011, 07:45:08 PM
I really appreciate the comments of the folks who replied to my rant. Nice to know there's some modicum of sane folks left!
However, you came dangerously close to getting political.
There were plenty of "celebrities" that were pretty much jerks "back in the day." Lindbergh got a medal from the Nazis and tried to keep the US out of the war. John Wayne never served in the military and Ronald Reagan did--but never left Hollywood. Granted, Jimmy Stewart and Clark Gable did fly combat in the USAAF. General Stewart actively served his country until his retirement from the USAF in 1959. But he never made a big deal of it. Clark Gable only flew 5 combat missions. He spent most of the war way behind the lines. For my money, one of the greatest heroes "back in the day" was Douglas Fairbanks, Jr. Check out his war record.:
http://www.history.navy.mil/bios/fairbanks_douge.htm (http://www.history.navy.mil/bios/fairbanks_douge.htm)
As regards Jane Fonda: The "Hanoi Jane" issue is almost 40 years old. She is 73, isn't it time to get over it? Sean Penn has made quite a few people uncomfortable by his questioning the actions and policies of his country. Guess what? They are living in America, and have a perfect right to free speech. Both actors have impressive resumes and they should be famous for their acting in films and on stage. You disagree with their politics? Too bad. I admire John Voight's movies. He has some truly brilliant performances. However, I dislike the man John Voight intensely for his extreme political stances. He deserves recognition for his work--not his personality.
Now, if you were ranting only about how some Guidos and Bimbos from Jersey got famous, or why any of us should give a rats patoot about someone named Kardassian, I could agree.
Dave, I fully understand that a lot of Hollywood's A-list from the classic era were as debauched as some of today's "celebrities". Bob Hope's infidelities, the folks you mentioned, etc. for example. I guess for me the difference is back then if one was going to act immoral they tried to hide it. Due to today's decline in general morality it's paraded in front of the camera, and applauded by the masses. *That* is the deeper issue the way I see it. No one is perfect, and we all screw up. But to put it out there as entertainment goes beyond the pale for me.
I was explaining to my daughter how years ago an unmarried pregnancy was a societal taboo. Some girls were sent away to be away from their neighbors as it was seen as shameful. Nowadays it's a show on MTV!!!
Thanks for commenting.
(http://brandonbird.com/lunchboxes_1000.jpg)
Not monster related, but still funny.
http://brandonbird.com/lunchboxes.html?utm_source=BrandonBird.com&utm_campaign=214fbb7118-Lunchboxes9_6_2011&utm_medium=email (http://brandonbird.com/lunchboxes.html?utm_source=BrandonBird.com&utm_campaign=214fbb7118-Lunchboxes9_6_2011&utm_medium=email)
Love the Grand Torino one!
I'd buy it! ;D
If you don't subscribe to the comic strip "Lio" you are missing one of the best monster-themed strips around. Today's is a PERFECT example of what I mean:
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/lio110925.gif)
GO LIO!!!!!
Quote from: Illoman on September 25, 2011, 08:20:26 AM
If you don't subscribe to the comic strip "Lio" you are missing one of the best monster-themed strips around. Today's is a PERFECT example of what I mean:
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/lio110925.gif)
GO LIO!!!!!
That's just beautiful on a multitude of levels.
Nice!!
I sent this to a ton of people because I think it's my favorite Lio strip so far. You would not believe how many times I had to explain it!!! People who don't know the strip think he was running away from Dracula. I said, no he *embraces* monsters! LOL!!!
People who "don't get it" aren't Monster Kids, I guess! Lio did what I'd be tempted to do! You GO, LIO!!
(http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/9488/tumblrlrryvtcgdu1qfv5af.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/37/tumblrlrryvtcgdu1qfv5af.jpg/)
Ah Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!!! I had an Uncle who would tell me the funniest jokes while standing 5 feet from a casket!
(http://img855.imageshack.us/img855/1139/20031022cxprobe.jpg)
(http://img820.imageshack.us/img820/7713/bizarro.gif)
Old Fart Football
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'
His wife rolls over and says, 'What in the world was that?'
The old man replied, 'its fart football.'
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says,'Touchdown, tie score...'
After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says,
'Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7.'
Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says,
'Touchdown, tie score.'
Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says,
'Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.' Now the pressure is on the old man.
He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard.
Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally craps in the bed.
The wife says, 'What the hell was that?'
The old man says, 'Half time, switch sides!"
Awesome, Scatter!!! :laugh:
Boobs and Willies
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?'
The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, a woman goes through three phases.
In her 20s, a woman's boobs are like melons, round and firm.
In Her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After 50, they are like onions'.
'Onions?'
'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.'
This infuriated his wife and daughter, so the daughter said, 'Mom, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?'
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man goes through
Three phases also.
In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and Hard.
In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.
After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree'.
'A Christmas tree?'
'Yes --- dead from the roots up and the balls are just for decoration.
LMAO John!!!
Here's one my brother sent me today...
(http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss74/FRANKENSTIEN53/299916_10150332217379759_763759758_7833974_1627278750_n.jpg)
Mcdee
Subject: Have a Happy Life
Tony and Yvonne were 85 years old and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they carefully watched their pennies.
Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to Yvonne's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.
One day, their good health didn't help when they went on yet another holiday vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.
They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.'
Tony asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. 'Why, nothing,' Peter replied, 'remember, this is your reward in Heaven.'
Tony looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth..
'What are the greens fees?,' grumbled Tony..
'This is heaven,' St. Peter replied. 'You can play for free, every day.'
Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch.
'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter to Tony. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.'
Tony looked around and nervously asked Yvonne, 'Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods and the decaffeinated tea?'
'That's the best part,' St. Peter replied. 'You can eat and drink as much as you like and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!'
'No gym to work out at?' said Tony
'Not unless you want to,' was the answer.
'No testing my sugar or blood pressure or...'
'Never again'
Tony glared at Yvonne and said, 'You and your Bran Flakes. We could have been here ten years ago!'
This cracked me up....
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/297086_155885307837209_151286198297120_288355_1386386893_n.jpg)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Cereal.png)
Quote from: Illoman on October 07, 2011, 06:22:46 PM
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Cereal.png)
I want this on my wall!!
Here's a Gorilla joke I heard a long time ago - it's really better as a visual... I'll try not to drag it out.
This guy is at the zoo and stops in front of the gorilla cage, inhabited by a 500 pound silverback. The guy gets an itch on his nose and scratches it. He notices that the gorilla mimics his actions, so he spends a few minutes making hand movements & whatnot with the big ape, who does everything the guy does. Suddenly, a gust of wind blows some dust into the guy's eye and he wipes at it with his index finger. The gorilla goes ape-s*** and reaches out through the bars, grabs the guy and starts slamming him over & over against the steel cage! The zookeepers rush to his aid and wrest the battered man from the gorilla's grip. The guy is busted up, bleeding and black & blue. The zookeepers ask him what he did and he tells them the whole interaction thing. When he tells them about wiping the dust out of his eye, they explain, " Well, that's it - in gorilla lanquage, pulling down the lower eyelid means, 'kiss my ass'! You're lucky he didn't kill you! " The guy gets treated at the medical center, then goes home.
The more he thinks about it, the more steamed he gets. He decides to get revenge on the gorilla. A few weeks later, he's back at the zoo in front of the gorilla cage. Their eyes meet, but the gorilla obviously doesn't recognize him. The guy pulls out 2 huge butcher knives and hands one to the ape. The guys swings his knife around, cutting at the air, and once again, the gorilla makes the same exact moves with his knife that the guy does. Suddenly, the guy pulls out a big salami, holds it out near his groin and slices it in half!
The gorilla stops & looks directly at the guy - then he takes his index finger and pulls down on his lower eyelid.
UP that's hilarious!!!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/298918_10150312573137271_590152270_8223781_1487704813_n.jpg)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/download.jpg)
A teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class.
She came to the part of the story where first pig was trying to gather
the building materials for his home.
She read. 'And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow
full of straw and said: 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that
straw to build my house?'
The teacher paused then asked the class: 'And what do you think
the man said?'
One little boy raised his hand and said very matter-of-factly...
'I think the man would have said - 'I'll be a son of a bitch!! A talking pig!'
The teacher had to leave the room.
Quote from: Illoman on October 08, 2011, 02:56:15 PM
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/298918_10150312573137271_590152270_8223781_1487704813_n.jpg)
Great! Now I have that song running through my head! ;D
New book club . . .
Oprah's Book Club is gonna get its butt kicked.
(http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/4917/jayneaustenbookandgun.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/853/jayneaustenbookandgun.jpg/)
Quote from: Mcdee on October 02, 2011, 09:02:59 PM
LMAO John!!!
Here's one my brother sent me today...
(http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss74/FRANKENSTIEN53/299916_10150332217379759_763759758_7833974_1627278750_n.jpg)
Mcdee
I love this one!!
This one is exceptionally timely. Wife recently bought a Beta fish, and two acquatic Frogs for my son, and they live in a small tank in the kitchen
OG
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/Creechpix.gif)
O.G.- I WISH I would find that scene in a Beta Bowl!! I love it! :)
Guess things are tough all over . . .
(http://img225.imageshack.us/img225/7294/crstr111013.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/225/crstr111013.gif/)
This is where we really miss Unknown Primate, he always comes up with some very funny zingers. At least Fester is keeping pace.
Vern works hard at the Phone Company but spends two nights each week bowling, and plays golf every Saturday.
His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, 'Hey, Vern! How ya doin?'
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
'Oh no,' says Vern. 'He's in my bowling league.
When they are seated, a waitress asks Vern if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, 'How did she know that you drink Budweiser?'
'I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club.
I always have a Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey.'
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Vern, starts to rub herself all over him and says,
'Hi Vern. Want your usual table dance, big boy?'
Vern's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Vern follows and spots her getting into a cab.
Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
Vern tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book..
The cabby turns around and says,
'Geez Vern, you picked up a real bitch this time'
VERN'S FUNERAL WILL BE HELD THIS COMING FRIDAY.
HA!!! ;D ;D ;D
A man traveling through rural North Carolina got lost, and stopped by a farmhouse to ask directions. His eye was caught by a pig with a wooden leg. So he said to the farmer "I don't think I've ever seen a pig with a wooden leg. What happened to it?"
"Well," said the farmer, "this is a truly remarkable animal. A few years back, it was rooting around under the oak trees near the house and discovered truffles. This new crop has brought us a tidy income, I can assure you."
"Fascinating," said the visitor. "I never heard of truffles in North Carolina. But -- why does it have a wooden leg?"
"Well," said the farmer, "just last year, on the north forty, the pig discovered oil, and the proceeds from that oil well are going to make us set for life, including even being able to send all our kids to college."
"A truly incredible animal," said the guy. "I am sure that you are the envy of all your neighbors. But why does he have a wooden leg?"
"About six months ago, the farmhouse caught on fire," said the farmer, "and this pig saved our lives. He rushed upstairs, woke us all up, carried my baby daughter down the stairs by the hair, and made sure we were all safe outside."
"Wow," said the visitor. "You are very fortunate, indeed. But I'm still curious about the wooden leg."
"Oh," said the farmer, "if you have a pig that valuable, you don't eat it all at once."
:) Good one, Fester. :)
Yep, Its a real place.
(http://img192.imageshack.us/img192/2297/donnerpicnicarea.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/192/donnerpicnicarea.jpg/)
Don't know why, exactly, but this one hit my funny bone.
(http://img339.imageshack.us/img339/5387/4c330b60d356012e2f92001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/339/4c330b60d356012e2f92001.gif/)
In that vein...
35 Unfortunately Named Dead People:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/unfortunately-named-dead-people/ (http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/unfortunately-named-dead-people/)
Those headstones are great! I actually have a relative who's name was Iona P. Hole! Keep planning to take a pic of her tombstone.
Remember this, anyone? Still freakin' funny!
THE COPPER CLAPPER CAPER - 3.30.wmv (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2W5UxoMikHc#)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on October 27, 2011, 01:37:56 AM
In that vein...
35 Unfortunately Named Dead People:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/unfortunately-named-dead-people/ (http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/unfortunately-named-dead-people/)
I had tears rolling down my face as I read those!! Thanks for posting that!!
Quote from: Unknown Primate on October 27, 2011, 04:11:47 PM
Remember this, anyone? Still freakin' funny!
THE COPPER CLAPPER CAPER - 3.30.wmv (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2W5UxoMikHc#)
Oh, yeah, UP!!! Freaking hilarious!!!
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/Jeeves.gif)
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/creech2.gif)
The Great Flydini<object style="height: 390px; width: 640px"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/alD_tukE77Q?version=3&feature=player_detailpage"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/alD_tukE77Q?version=3&feature=player_detailpage" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="360"></object>
NASA Satellite Falls On Car (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgTyiaDmytw#ws)
That NASA satellite gag is priceless!
The NASA one's funny but looks staged. It can't be that easy to remove a hood from a car.
(http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss74/FRANKENSTIEN53/314921_228657700532017_150665568331231_671113_1274743143_n.jpg)
....just sayin' ...
Mcdee
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/photo.jpg)
(http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a73/walkie20/vampirechart.jpg)
(link to the print: http://society6.com/bendouglass/Vampires_Print (http://society6.com/bendouglass/Vampires_Print))
Moonshadow- That is so cool!! The one that didn't get interviewed is hilarious! I HAVE to share this with my kids. They'll love it :)
The sign SAID "Donkey Rides 10 Cents".
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
(http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6040/6313402603_20bb627064_b.jpg)
I WANT MY MONEY BACK!!!
It took me a moment to realize Blade was moving in to kill Edward. HA!
Quote from: Moonshadow on October 31, 2011, 09:57:48 PM
(http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a73/walkie20/vampirechart.jpg)
(link to the print: http://society6.com/bendouglass/Vampires_Print (http://society6.com/bendouglass/Vampires_Print))
The Agony of Hearing Loss...
After Daylight Savings Time ended I stopped in to visit my hearing impaired friend.
He was busy painting his penis with a black marker.
I said to him, "You idiot! You're supposed to turn your clock back!" :)
Why am I so ashamed of myself for laughing out loud at that John?? ;D ;D
(http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/attachment/007/)
(http://www.holytaco.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/007.jpg)
http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/ (http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/)
(http://img197.imageshack.us/img197/3428/dwarffelloff400.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/197/dwarffelloff400.jpg/)
Quote from: Gillfan on November 16, 2011, 05:05:10 PM
(http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/attachment/007/)
(http://www.holytaco.com/http://www.universalmonsterarmy.com/forum/Smileys/default/grin.gifwp-content/uploads/2011/11/007.jpg)
http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/ (http://www.holytaco.com/oh-man-someones-gonna-be-pissed/)
That's my sense of humor right there ;D
(http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/7392/crspe111117.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/64/crspe111117.gif/)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/photo-1.jpg)
That Goldfinger...what a sadist!
That is Evil Mr Goldfinger, just plain evil!!!
(http://img835.imageshack.us/img835/2048/nonsequitirviking500.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/835/nonsequitirviking500.jpg/)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/photo-2.jpg)
LOVE that Superman one!!
(http://img403.imageshack.us/img403/8048/crspe111209.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/403/crspe111209.gif/)
I'll just quietly close down, don't bother yourself . . . .
Fester, that's hilarious!! Makes me think of Pink Floyd's song Mother! LOL!!!
(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/alternative_energy_revolution.jpg)
Just to clarify, I am not against alternative energy, I just found this amusing.
Gillfan,
An XKCD classic if there ever was one!
Windmill farms are still rare enough that they do look creepy.
I see it more of an update on Cervantes ;D
We have those creepy-ass windmill fields just a few miles from here! If I had a horse, I'd go all quixotic on them, too!
Quote from: Unknown Primate on December 11, 2011, 01:09:34 PM
We have those creepy-ass windmill fields just a few miles from here! If I had a horse, I'd go all quixotic on them, too!
Doesn't a man with a cane tilt at windmills whether he wants to or not?
Quote from: Scatter on December 11, 2011, 06:41:18 PM
Doesn't a man with a cane tilt at windmills whether he wants to or not?
It kind of depends on which hand is holding the cane. He could be tilting away.
Quote from: Unknown Primate on December 11, 2011, 01:09:34 PM
We have those creepy-ass windmill fields just a few miles from here! If I had a horse, I'd go all quixotic on them, too!
I think you'd need a Clydesdale.
That would be a great painting!
Drinking and Driving...
As the Christmas spirit will be flowing over the festivities I thought I would share this experience about drinking and driving.
As you well know, some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years.
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends and had a few too many beers and some shots. Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before - I took a bus home. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise, as I have never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got this one.
:)
Quote from: FACTO2 on December 16, 2011, 01:26:34 PM
Drinking and Driving...
As the Christmas spirit will be flowing over the festivities I thought I would share this experience about drinking and driving.
As you well know, some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years.
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends and had a few too many beers and some shots. Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before - I took a bus home. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise, as I have never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got this one.
:)
Why didn't you just ask one of the screaming elementary school kids in the back?
Padarump!
Quote from: Scatter on December 11, 2011, 06:41:18 PM
Doesn't a man with a cane tilt at windmills whether he wants to or not?
Quote from: Fester on December 11, 2011, 08:10:23 PM
It kind of depends on which hand is holding the cane. He could be tilting away.
Quote from: Gillfan on December 11, 2011, 08:42:28 PM
I think you'd need a Clydesdale.
That would be a great painting!
Mike, I was in a male stripper group called "The Clydesdales"!
Dave & Gary - you guys are hilarious - at least you didn't say I should change my name to Eileene!
All this talk about Cervantes' hero brought this to mind -
Gordon Lightfoot - Don Quixote (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZySoo0TIT4#)
BTW,
FACTO - That was classic!!!
Wait...what??? All this talk about clydesdales and bus-jacking! You guys keep my spirits high! :) Thanks for the laughs...even though some of it goes right over my head!
Quote from: FACTO2 on December 16, 2011, 01:26:34 PM
Drinking and Driving...
As the Christmas spirit will be flowing over the festivities I thought I would share this experience about drinking and driving.
As you well know, some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years.
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends and had a few too many beers and some shots. Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before - I took a bus home. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise, as I have never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got this one.
:)
HA!
Jenny...
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him on the head with a frying pan.
'What was that for?' the man asked.
The wife replied, 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'.
The man then said 'When I was at the races last week, Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on.'
The wife apologized and went on with the housework.
Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious.
Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit him again.
Wife replied. 'Your horse called.' :)
HAAAAAAAAA!
Two guys walk into a bar - the third one ducks.
Two necrophiliacs are out taking a walk, when they see a mortuary. One of them says to the other, "Wanna stop in and have a cold one?"
Check out the fence, it's tore up! They really went out of their way to make this look real. A unique Christmas yard decoration. How's this for a Christmas yard decoration? The site is near the Oak Creek Bridge on the St. Michael's Road [MD 33]. The folks who own the property always have eye-catching displays celebrating various 'holidays' through the year... this year for Yuletide they have certainly outdone themselves!
Merry Christmas
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00009.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00007.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00004.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00008.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00005.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00002.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/image002.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/ATT00006.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/image0011.jpg)
They have an F-104 as a yard ornament?!?!?
How cool is that! ;D
A priest, a nun and a rabbi walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "What is this? A joke?"
(http://img88.imageshack.us/img88/9527/crspe120104.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/88/crspe120104.gif/)
(http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/3894/fb4f0520191e012f2fc6001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/692/fb4f0520191e012f2fc6001.gif/)
Quote from: Unknown Primate on December 21, 2011, 09:03:06 PM
Two necrophiliacs are out taking a walk, when they see a mortuary. One of them says to the other, "Wanna stop in and have a cold one?"
HA!!!!!!
Quote from: Gillfan on December 21, 2011, 09:33:26 PM
Check out the fence, it's tore up! They really went out of their way to make this look real. A unique Christmas yard decoration. How's this for a Christmas yard decoration? The site is near the Oak Creek Bridge on the St. Michael's Road [MD 33]. The folks who own the property always have eye-catching displays celebrating various 'holidays' through the year... this year for Yuletide they have certainly outdone themselves!
Merry Christmas
Freaking LOVE that!!
Quote from: Fester on January 14, 2012, 02:27:09 AM
(http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/3894/fb4f0520191e012f2fc6001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/692/fb4f0520191e012f2fc6001.gif/)
Oh MAN that's funny!! Thanks Dave!! ;D ;D
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/donna.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/sci-fi-fantasy-the-typical-persons-reaction-when-seeing-the-new-twilight-movie.jpg)
Keyboard for old retired guys. :)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/oldkeyboard1.jpg)
HA HA! ;D
laughing...I know where the porn sites are, but where are the sites for pirating music now that P2P are gone?
lol
Quote from: Bizarro Jeff on January 20, 2012, 03:36:15 PM
laughing...I know where the porn sites are, but where are the sites for pirating music now that P2P are gone?
lol
You can rip MP3s right off the YouTube videos for almost any song you can think of. At least until Obama's Storm Troopers shut 'er down.
I haven't downloaded any groovy tunes since Limewire was shut down - I need to find another site like that!
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/honesty.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/sci-fi-fantasy-watch-and-learn-cullen-watch-and-learn.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/sci-fi-fantasy-a-red-shirt-but-im-under-contract.jpg)
A MAN BOUGHT HIS WIFE A CEMETERY PLOT FOR CHRISTMAS.
THE NEXT YEAR HE BOUGHT HER NOTHING.
HEY!
COMPLAINED THE ANGRY WIFE,
HOW COME YOU DIDN'T BUY ME A CHRISTMAS PRESENT THIS YEAR?
YOU DIDN'T USE THE PRESENT I GOT YOU LAST YEAR,
SAID THE HUSBAND
;D
ALL THE MALE FROGS WERE SITTING AROUND ON THEIR LILY PADS, TRILLING IN THE POND, HOPING TO ATTRACT FEMALE FROGS.
YOU COULD HEAR THE FROG TRILLING FOR MILES AROUND.
HEY, SAID ONE FROG TO ANOTHER, THERE'S HARRY AND MARTHA. HOW COME HARRY'S SO QUIET?
WELL, HARRY AND MARTHA HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR TWENTY-THREE YEARS NOW, SAID THE SECOND FROG.
YEAH, SAID THE FIRST FROG, I GUESS THE TRILL IS GONE...
:) Ha!!! I didn't see that one coming, Fester! Best Frog Joke Ever!
I am so thankful for this topic! :) Keep em' coming!
Charp13
This is the only other frog joke I Know:
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."
Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The frog says $30,000.
The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral. The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall. Bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says: "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant "I mean, what is this?"
So the bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
(http://www.flickr.com/photos/17472397(*at*)N07/6752142167/in/photostream)
Is this an Invisible Man joke? :)
I don't see the humor in this... :D
Drawing a blank here. . .
A frail little guy walked into a bar and asked out loud, "Who owns that huge rottweiler tied up outside?" A big, burly biker-type looks around and says, "I do - he's 180 lbs. of canine fury! Why you wanna know?" The little guy replies, "Well, I'm sorry to say, my dog just killed your dog." The big man can't believe it and asks, "What the hell kinda dog you have, anyway?" The little man tells him that his dog is a chihuahua. The big dude really can't believe it now and asks, "How did a little pip-squeak like that KILL my dog?!" The little man replied... "Your dog choked to death on my dog!"
A MILD-MANNERED, TIMID-LOOKING MAN SAT AT A TABLE IN A LOCAL BAR. HE SAT STARING INTENTLY AT HIS DRINK. HE KEPT TIMIDLY STARING AT IT.
FINALLY, A LOCAL BAR ROOM BRAWLER CAME OVER TO HIS TABLE AND SAT HIMSELF DOWN. THE BULLY PUSHED THE LITTLE MAN ASIDE AND GUZZLED DOWN THE DRINK HIMSELF. THE BRAWLER LAUGHED OUT LOUD AND WIPED HIS MOUTH ON HIS SLEEVE.
THE NERDY LITTLE MAN WAS VERY SURPRISED AND STARTED CRYING.
DAMN!, SAID THE BULLY, I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D TAKE IT SO HARD, LITTLE FELLA.
THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE, SAID THE LITTLE MAN, FIRST, I'M LATE FOR WORK AND MY BOSS FIRES ME. THEN, I GO TO LEAVE AND I FIND MY CAR WAS STOLEN. THEN, I TAKE A TAXI HOME AND I LEAVE MY WALLET IN THE CAB. THEN, I ARRIVE HOME AND I FIND MY WIFE IN BED WITH THE POOL BOY.
WELL, I GUESS THIS JUST AIN'T YOUR DAY, CHUCKLED THE BULLY, TOO BAD!
YES, SAID THE MILD-MANNERED MAN, AND AFTER ALL THAT, YOU SHOW UP AND DRINK ALL MY POISON.
Applause!! I love the frog and dog jokes! :)
(http://img401.imageshack.us/img401/9338/largeimagecrspe101006.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/401/largeimagecrspe101006.gif/)
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/2179/mgg20120121.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/841/mgg20120121.gif/)
(http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/9583/mgg20120119.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/268/mgg20120119.gif/)
No, was trying to post a cartoon, and am having problems......
its not posting...
Bizarro Jeff
Two from my brother....
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started...
******************************************
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""
Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...
Hey, Unknown Primate. This one's for you.
."`".
.---./ _=_ \.---.
{ (,(oYo),) }
{ {| " |} }
{ { \(---)/ } }
{ {}'-=-'{} }
{ {}._:_.{} }
{ {} -:- {} }
{_{_}`===` {_}_}
((((((\) (/))))))
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
That is cool as hell, General - thanks, bruddah!
(http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/rmc/lowres/rmcn283l.jpg)
hmmmm got URL to a pic but its not showing up sorry
Earl and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing,
chewing tobacco and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says,
"I think I'm gonna divorce my wife - she ain't spoke to
me in over 2 months."
Earl spits, sips his beer and says, "Better think it over...
women like that are hard to find."
LOL. :)
Quote from: Fester on January 23, 2012, 10:59:51 PM
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/2179/mgg20120121.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/841/mgg20120121.gif/)
I'm impressed-that is the actual way to spell Mothra in Japanese!
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/sci-fi-fantasy-twilight-harry-potter-you-promise.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/sci-fi-fantasy-super-glue-on-the-rail-not-funny-mr-data.jpg)
CALORIES BURNED DURING SEX
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent.................................12 Calories
Without her consent...........................2,187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................. 8 Calories
With one hand....................................12 Calories
With your teeth.................................485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection..................................6 Calories
Without an erection...........................3,315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary...................................12 Calories
69 lying down...............................78 Calories
69 standing up..............................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow................................216 Calories
Doggy Style..................................326 Calories
Italian Chandelier..........................2,912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real........................................112 Calories
Fake..........................................1,315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.............................18 Calories
Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately...816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
18-29 years......................................36 Calories
30-39 years......................................80 Calories
40-49 years.....................................124 Calories
50-59 years...................................1,972 Calories
60-69 years...................................7,916 Calories *****
70 and over........................Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS
Calmly..........................................32 Calories
In a hurry.......................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..........5,218 Calories
With her husband knocking at the door......8,775 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories
Results may vary.
Pink Panther The Inspector Transylvania Mania (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iz1E0drNoL0#)
I really need to get myself one of these...
(http://rlv.zcache.com/stupid_college_teachers_students_school_cup_class_mug-p168388490523555971z89we_400.jpg)
Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
Quote from: Bizarro Jeff on January 30, 2012, 06:35:03 AM
Pink Panther The Inspector Transylvania Mania (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iz1E0drNoL0#)
Sweet!!
Happy Groundhog Day!
(http://img837.imageshack.us/img837/5401/nq120202.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/837/nq120202.gif/)
Since more and more seniors citizens are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for senior discounts, these are the codes for you:
ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing...Can't Get Up
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WTP: Where's The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/work%20order.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on February 02, 2012, 04:23:44 PM
Happy Groundhog Day!
(http://img837.imageshack.us/img837/5401/nq120202.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/837/nq120202.gif/)
HA!!! ;D ;D
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/273ff74030cc012f2fd000163e41dd5b.gif)
Anybody read Scary Gary? Great stuff!!
My wife told me to go to the doctors and get some of those tablets that 'help' get an erection.
You should have seen her face when I came back and tossed her some diet pills!
I'm still looking for a place to live.
You know....the comic strips and cartoons- I immediately understand- and I laugh and/or giggle. But some of these that I have to read....take me a few minutes( or days) to get.
Illoman- I actually laughed within seconds of that one! :)
Fester- Those STCs are way too hard for me to remember :) I guess I'll just have to ignore my Senior-itis!
Quote from: charp13 on February 09, 2012, 06:05:34 PM
You know....the comic strips and cartoons- I immediately understand- and I laugh and/or giggle. But some of these that I have to read....take me a few minutes( or days) to get.
Illoman- I actually laughed within seconds of that one! :)
Fester- Those STCs are way too hard for me to remember :) I guess I'll just have to ignore my Senior-itis!
Charpie, almost *no one* in my immediate family ever gets the Lio strip, let alone thinks it funny. I *love* Lio, and have a desktop calendar, and I subscribe to it so i get a daily double dose of Lio. The author of Lio told me about Scary Gary.
(http://i371.photobucket.com/albums/oo156/CreepysFan/holly.jpg)
QuoteThe author of Lio told me about Scary Gary.
Lio is great! Now I'm gonna get into Scary Gary! Buddy
(http://img267.imageshack.us/img267/498/paraabdlowevamphunt.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/267/paraabdlowevamphunt.jpg/)
This is also one of the great comics I've seen online.
http://www.paraabnormalthecomic.com/ (http://www.paraabnormalthecomic.com/)
CreepysFan- I'm going to have to send that one to everyone in my family! :) PERFECT!
Fester- That made my day!! I was getting my hair weedwacked off my head today, and I had to hear people talk about "the glitter movie's" midnight release....for over an hour! :)
Quote from: charp13 on February 10, 2012, 03:45:05 PM
CreepysFan- I'm going to have to send that one to everyone in my family! :) PERFECT!
Fester- That made my day!! I was getting my hair weedwacked off my head today, and I had to hear people talk about "the glitter movie's" midnight release....for over an hour! :)
You have my deepest sympathy. That discussion should be banned as a violation of the Geneva Convention! ;D
Warning, Blonde joke ahead. :)
One winter morning a husband and wife in Rhode Island were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through."
So the good wife went out and moved her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.
"The good wife went out and moved her car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park....." Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?"
With the love and understanding in his voice, that all men who are married to BLONDE WOMEN exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
Several days ago as I left a meeting at the bar;I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.
Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically,I headed for the parking lot. My wife has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen.As I burst through the door,I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.
I immediately called the police. I gave them my location,confessed that I had left my keys in the car,and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all,"Honey,"I stammered;I always call her "honey" in times like these. "I left my keys in the car,and it has been stolen."
There was a period of silence.I thought the call had been dropped,but then I heard her voice. "Idiot", she barked,"I dropped you off!"
Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed,I said,"Well,come and get me."
She retorted,"I will,as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car."
Yep it's the golden years.
(http://img808.imageshack.us/img808/6170/5c3f2ce03345012f2fd0001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/808/5c3f2ce03345012f2fd0001.gif/)
http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/nstv/2012/03/swarm-of-robot-helicopters-performs-james-bond-tune.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news (http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/nstv/2012/03/swarm-of-robot-helicopters-performs-james-bond-tune.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news)
Sure, it's cute now, but it's just the first step in robot Armageddon.
Oh my...
The George Takei Happy Dance (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSjO-rWMuJo#ws)
Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked,
'How old was your husband?'
'98,' she replied..'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented..
She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it? ;D
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/walkdeadcartoon.jpg)
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.
But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over. ::)
What an image, Dave!
A man who suffered from elephantitis of the testicles went to his doctor and asked him what he could do about it. The doctor told him he should be committed to a mental institution. The man asked, "Why?"
The doctor replied...
"Hell, you're half nuts!"
A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'
The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?'
'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?' and he smiles.
OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass - . Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'
The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.'
To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know $hit? :)
A WARNING TO US ALL!
I NEVER KNEW THIS!
Shampoo Warning :
I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner! I use shampoo in the shower!
When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body, and
printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning:
"FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY."
No wonder I have been gaining weight!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start showering with Dawn dish soap instead.
Its label reads :
"DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE."
Problem solved!
::)
I was in my back yard trying to launch a kite.
I threw the kite up in the air, the wind would catch it for a few
seconds, then it would come crashing back down to earth.
I tried this a few more times with no success.
All the while, my wife is watching from the kitchen window,
Muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything.
She opens the window and yelled to me,
'You need a piece of tail.'
I turned with a confused look on my face and yelled back,
'Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite.' ;)
Sunday's Bizarro:
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Bizarro-03-18-12-WEB.jpg)
Love it! Piraro is always riffing on pop culture.
Look for it... :)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/dork.jpg)
You all are in the zone! I had some mucho needed laughs! :)
I now fully understand the new Burton film, as well :)
(http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/6218/crspe120224.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/833/crspe120224.gif/)
(http://img714.imageshack.us/img714/7497/tas120319.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/714/tas120319.gif/)
Dave - those are GREAT!!
Sports headline of the day:
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/Tiger.jpg)
;)
This a real ad from an old magazine:
(http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6113/7022989283_41e251a654_b.jpg)
Rob
Must've been using john Wayne toilet paper before.
ROUGH TOUGH AND DON'T TAKE crap OFF OF NOBODY!
Quote from: monsterphile on March 28, 2012, 01:16:15 AM
This a real ad from an old magazine:
(http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6113/7022989283_41e251a654_b.jpg)
Rob
I think I've located your problem:
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7128/6877156390_7043ab8cf9_z.jpg)
OUCH!!
I've always said, a man is only as strong as his a******. :D
Quote from: FACTO2 on March 11, 2012, 04:03:51 PM
Oh my...
The George Takei Happy Dance (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSjO-rWMuJo#ws)
Ironically enough, after seeing this I now support the internment of at least one Japanese American.
Quote from: Fester on March 19, 2012, 01:47:28 AM
A WARNING TO US ALL!
I NEVER KNEW THIS!
Shampoo Warning :
I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner! I use shampoo in the shower!
When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body, and
printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning:
"FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY."
No wonder I have been gaining weight!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start showering with Dawn dish soap instead.
Its label reads :
"DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE."
Problem solved!
::)
God bless you for this miraculous discovery Dave!! Now, there's a rack of ribs with my name on it out there somewhere.
I feel so bad for Jimmy. Let's just say...I couldn't get along with other children from 1972-1979.
Quote from: Scatter on March 28, 2012, 05:43:35 PM
Ironically enough, after seeing this I now support the internment of at least one Japanese American.
Interestingly, he actually spent time in a camp. A rather shameful period for the US.
(http://img528.imageshack.us/img528/8231/14yxf8st7.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/528/14yxf8st7.jpg/)
Good one, Dave!! :laugh:
(http://www.badideatshirts.com/Assets/ProductImages/PS_1085W_ZOMBIES_TRIPPING.jpg)
(http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/305938_10150779310736147_242660316146_12097376_402706103_n.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/F1x7V.jpg)
Good one, Mike!! LOL!
Quote from: Gillfan on March 28, 2012, 09:46:42 PM
Interestingly, he actually spent time in a camp. A rather shameful period for the US.
Yup. But he should still be forbidden to repeat that dance anywhere, anytime. If that takes additional internment, I'm still for it.
Quote from: Scatter on April 15, 2012, 05:15:23 PM
Yup. But he should still be forbidden to repeat that dance anywhere, anytime. If that takes additional internment, I'm still for it.
The internment of 140,000 American citizens and/or residents solely because of their race was an unnecessary and dark chapter of our history.
That being said, given George's happy dance, I would support legislation to ban it (as well as the designated hitter rule; astroturf in baseball, and spandex in
any size larger than medium.
On to more serious matters:
(http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/7564/crspe120309.gif)
(http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/6649/crspe120307.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/831/crspe120307.gif/)
True story:
So here I sit in a new deployment on a little Island in the South Pacific, still with a Fire Department of course. So we get this emergency call to the High School on Island. We have a report of a smoke detector going off. All our trucks arrive and stage in their perspective areas. I enter with my crew. What do we find? Our next generation of geniuses had placed the smoke machine they were using for their laser tag game underneath the smoke detector. What is our world coming to. Real Einsteins.
Wolf Man- Buddy, you sure do get around :) Nice to hear a story from you, old monster buddy! I will alert any kid I know about mixing smoke effects and smoke detectors. It's sad, but sometimes they just don't know.... hahahaha!!
Quote from: Wolf Man on April 23, 2012, 01:04:49 AM
True story:
So here I sit in a new deployment on a little Island in the South Pacific, still with a Fire Department of course. So we get this emergency call to the High School on Island. We have a report of a smoke detector going off. All our trucks arrive and stage in their perspective areas. I enter with my crew. What do we find? Our next generation of geniuses had placed the smoke machine they were using for their laser tag game underneath the smoke detector. What is our world coming to. Real Einsteins.
I'd be more concerned if they did it more than once.
(http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/8240/crspe120410.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/210/crspe120410.gif/)
Two old guys, one 80 and one 87, were sitting on their usual park bench one morning. The 87 year old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath. The 80 year old was amazed at his friend's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy.
The 87 year old said, "Well, I eat rye bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies."
So, on the way home, the 80 year old stops at the bakery. As he was looking around, the lady asked if he needed any help. He said, "Do you have any rye bread?"
She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?"
He said, "I want 5 loaves.
She said, "My goodness, 5 loaves.. by the time you get to the 5th loaf, it'll be hard."
He replied , "I can't believe it, everybody in the world knows about this crap but me!"
(http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/641/tas120417.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/204/tas120417.gif/)
(http://img442.imageshack.us/img442/108/0a8896006acd012f2fdc001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/442/0a8896006acd012f2fdc001.gif/)
15 Signs you are living too fast.
You Know life is getting too fast when...
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list
All of the above, Dave! ;D
Speaking of BIGFOOT on the Finding Bigfoot thread :) - Two bigfoot hunters came across some giant footprints in the snow. In between the prints was a long, deep trench, which prompted the hunters to observe, " I think we're calling him by the wrong name! " ;)
Quote from: Unknown Primate on April 27, 2012, 04:37:03 PM
All of the above, Dave! ;D
Speaking of BIGFOOT on the Finding Bigfoot thread :) - Two bigfoot hunters came across some giant footprints in the snow. In between the prints was a long, deep trench, which prompted the hunters to observe, " I think we're calling him by the wrong name! " ;)
Like Biggus Dickus?? Sorry. Watched Monty Python's "The Life Of Brian" yesterday.
Oh Gary, you card!
Just trust me and watch it...
Walt Disney's Taxi Driver on Vimeo (http://vimeo.com/37154658)
That was *hysterical*!!! Thanks!!
Thanks to Mombie for this one!!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Bela.jpg)
Bisleri Mountain Water Commercial - 'Bissi' - 60 Sec. Eng. - 2011 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMNB4ZuKOEw#ws)
(http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/1066/tas120502.gif)
Quote from: Illoman on April 29, 2012, 04:33:27 PM
Thanks to Mombie for this one!!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Bela.jpg)
Genius!
Quote from: FACTO2 on April 28, 2012, 05:26:54 PM
Just trust me and watch it...
Walt Disney's Taxi Driver on Vimeo (http://vimeo.com/37154658)
Man, when he started the classic "You talkin' to ME?" with those Mickey ears on, I almost lost it!! ;D ;D
Quote from: Fester on May 02, 2012, 10:00:21 PM
(http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/1066/tas120502.gif)
HA!!! ;D
(http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/8205/draculag.jpg)
(http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/6561/crspe120507.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/694/crspe120507.gif/)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/monsterstrike.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/funny.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/morgue-shooting-spree.jpg)
Quote from: Zackuth on May 06, 2012, 09:20:19 PM
(http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/8205/draculag.jpg)
Now THAT is funny!
Great stuff, missdead13! 17 REMAIN DEAD! ;D
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/iChatImage3as.jpg)
HA! ;D
lol Love it!
Great stuff!!
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/fridaythe12th.gif)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/glock-holsters.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/wow.jpg)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/318121_388717574503540_150556221653011_1037133_1069545027_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on May 11, 2012, 07:49:04 AM
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/318121_388717574503540_150556221653011_1037133_1069545027_n.jpg)
how romantic ;D
Indeed! Parents of a friend of mine renewed their wedding vows last year and included something like that in them. It was great. lol
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/544685_381061985279282_248340515218097_1063227_1320170623_n.jpg)
These things are hilarious. They're fake email responses to ads in the paper (language warning):
Don't Even Reply (http://dontevenreply.com/top.php)
;D
Quote from: Hepcat on May 11, 2012, 02:45:48 PM
These things are hilarious. They're fake email responses to ads in the paper:
Don't Even Reply (http://dontevenreply.com/top.php)
;D
I really liked THIS one: http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=110 (http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=110)
Quote from: Gillfan on May 09, 2012, 07:00:27 AM
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/iChatImage3as.jpg)
HAHAHAHAHA!!! ;D
Quote from: Hepcat on May 11, 2012, 02:45:48 PM
These things are hilarious. They're fake email responses to ads in the paper (language warning):
Don't Even Reply (http://dontevenreply.com/top.php)
;D
Oh man, When I showed these to Nancy a while back she said they sounded exactly like something I would do ;D
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on May 11, 2012, 03:01:22 PM
I really liked THIS one: http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=110 (http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=110)
That guy's messing with his karma for sure, but still, those were funny as heck.
(http://www.flashglamtrash.com/gallery/p-1-5934.png)
missdead...you crack me up! lol!!!
Quote from: Moonshadow on May 11, 2012, 07:15:54 PM
That guy's messing with his karma for sure, but still, those were funny as heck.
He should have done "Kittens for My Python" instead of "Kittens for My Tiger". It would have been more believable that way. A lot of people keep snakes.
:-\
(http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/7930/c3e0eb8075cc012f2fdd001.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/27/c3e0eb8075cc012f2fdd001.gif/)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Gods_Creatures.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/prep.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Errormessage.gif)
I'd like to add "Rip the computer out of the wall and crush it to pieces."
Quote from: Wolf Man on June 21, 2010, 08:01:54 AM
I love the Viking one. Since I am a Viking reenactor I have loads of hilarious Viking funnies. Friends always find good ones of Hagar the Horrible and say Yup, this is Erik the Bear. (Thats me)
Seen Elvis trooper in person too, as well as Jack Sparrow trooper, Burger King trooper, Peace trooper, Sith Vixen hot lady trooper in bare midrift armor and many more. Good shot of all the Cinnamon Bunn Leia's too.
I was re-enacting a viking last night at Renfaire. Pics to come later.
Quote from: missdead13 on May 12, 2012, 03:17:23 PM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Gods_Creatures.jpg)
Giggle!
;D
(http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/2715/funnyheadline5261x300.jpg)
(http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/6769/tas120512.gif)
Helpful and considerate!
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/Tramp.jpg)
;)
(http://www.bizarrocomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/bz-panel-05-10-12.jpg)
(http://bizarrocomic.blogspot.com/2011/01/pooh-talk.html)
(http://www.gocomics.com/speedbump/2012/03/18#mutable_761181)
Hepcat, that is freaking h i l a r i o u s! Took me a minute to get it but when I did, laughed out loud.
Hepcat - do you happen to have Kelly's phone number?
How is it that you know Kelly's name?
???
::)
(http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/3949/tumblrm3u1b2eizn1qzvsel.jpg)
There has to be some interesting back story to this one . . .
(http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/3426/legacyofbph.jpg)
(http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/6320/tas120521.gif)
(http://img850.imageshack.us/img850/5695/tumblrm3o4n7bu381qdwsy9.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/850/tumblrm3o4n7bu381qdwsy9.png/)
Slides are hardcore.
(http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/8229/53261610100261508463732.jpg)
Some beer jokes to make you smile.......
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7086/7266553544_18100e1af4.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266553544/)
why-beer-is-better (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266553544/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7233/7266551916_9c9aeb0c7b.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266551916/)
Friends-Beer-Girls-Wife-Funny (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266551916/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8028/7266552040_751611f264.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266552040/)
beer-funny-8 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266552040/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7211/7266552002_fa73bfe6ec.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266552002/)
because-beer-is-heavy (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266552002/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7088/7266551960_e7609e260a.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266551960/)
alcohol_research (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7266551960/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
Quote from: Fester on May 20, 2012, 08:48:35 PM
(http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/3949/tumblrm3u1b2eizn1qzvsel.jpg)
There has to be some interesting back story to this one . . .
(http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/3426/legacyofbph.jpg)
;D ;D
Quote from: Fester on May 20, 2012, 08:48:35 PM
(http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/3949/tumblrm3u1b2eizn1qzvsel.jpg)
There has to be some interesting back story to this one . . .
(http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/3426/legacyofbph.jpg)
Great..........now you've given Nancy ideas.
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8157/7270824456_953680a8a3_b.jpg)
Good one Adam ;D
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/s320x320/579760_387046957997644_130940650274944_937554_1934616849_n.jpg)
One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in the small New England town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and idly chatting about their lives, their families, etc., when suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Everyone quickly evacuated the Church, except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving... seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.
Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Do you not know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you afraid of me?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 31 years."
No, I'm married to his sister.....
Bizarro Jeff
You always have such good jokes Fester.
(http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTLOwZPRd0VHZMSohj2kybfmp3u9XXzSc1MKQzDMNXmUDo5FpMjohejwld5Mg)
(*at*) Fester. Now that was funny!!! :)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/hearsepostcard.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/sin.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Dreams.jpg)
Quote from: missdead13 on May 28, 2012, 03:50:58 AM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/hearsepostcard.jpg)
LOL nice!!!
(http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/9070/safetyfirstcopy.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/259/safetyfirstcopy.jpg/)
Quote from: Howler on May 28, 2012, 09:21:33 AM
LOL nice!!!
i know.. this is SOOOO me... lol
story of my life..me and my " stuff" . ( reminds me of that George Carlin bit he does about " stuff " )
Quote from: missdead13 on May 28, 2012, 04:12:55 PM
i know.. this is SOOOO me... lol
story of my life..me and my " stuff" . ( reminds me of that George Carlin bit he does about " stuff " )
If it was me I'd want the hearse as well. They would have to dig a huge hole and then just drive down there and leave it there. lol ;D
Quote from: missdead13 on May 28, 2012, 03:53:11 AM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Dreams.jpg)
That's one wise woman.
Weirdest Public Toilet:
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7219/7270817248_14987b10ec_b.jpg)
What I want to know is... What happens at night when the inside light comes on?
Quote from: missdead13 on May 28, 2012, 03:50:58 AM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/hearsepostcard.jpg)
"Think we're gonna need a bigger boat."
LITTLE JOHNNY TELLS A STORY
Little Johnny sees his father's car passing the playground and go
into the woods. Curious, he follows the car and sees his father and his aunt Jane "hugging" in the parked vehicle.
Johnny finds this very exciting and can barely contain himself so he runs home and starts to tell his mother,
"I was at the playground and I saw daddy's car go into the woods with aunt Jane. I went to look for them and I saw daddy giving aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then aunt Jane helped daddy take his pants off, then aunt Jane lay down on the seat, then daddy..."
At this point, Johnny's mother cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story. Suppose you save the rest of it for suppertime. I want to see the look on daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Johnny's mother asks him to tell his story, so Johnny starts to talk, describing the car into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat, and...
"...then daddy and aunt Jane did that same thing mommy and uncle Richard used to do when daddy was in the army."
Oh my! BigShadow, I didn't know where that story was going.... but it cracked me up big time- when it got there!! Very funny! :)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/look.jpg)
Suspicions confirmed.
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7231/7270788174_d0556a436f.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/fixodent.jpg)
(*at*) Missdead. Love it!!!
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7072/7302976030_8a6e798edf_z.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302976030/)
comicsasquatch1 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302976030/#) by The Golden Gorilla (http://www.flickr.com/people/67809938(*at*)N03/), on Flickr
This unfortunately named lady, may or may not be related to me. My grandfather's name was Jacob Hole. My family claimed they didn't know if she was a relative or not. I suspect she was. We took this pic a few days ago.
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8167/7302975942_429ba75eec_z.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302975942/)
(http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302975942/#) by The Golden Gorilla (http://www.flickr.com/people/67809938(*at*)N03/), on Flickr
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7089/7302975776_d4474e02d4.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302975776/)
(http://www.flickr.com/photos/67809938(*at*)N03/7302975776/#) by The Golden Gorilla (http://www.flickr.com/people/67809938(*at*)N03/), on Flickr
By the way, I also have an Uncle Harold "Bud" Hole, who is still living. His pals sometimes called him "Harry". His real pals called him "Harry Bud Hole!
UP- I felt like it was wrong to laugh, but I couldn't help myself! I am VERY immature, so anything having to do with "holes", "butts", etc.- is the funniest thing ever! :)
I just hope none of the Holes are offended by my amusement.
A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle.
He goes to a gun shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.
The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill."
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.
"I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house," the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house.
Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off."
The man takes another look through the scope, and says, "You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!"
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7212/7312579334_2cc1457649.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7312579334/)
demotivational-poster-3843 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/7312579334/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
Quote from: charp13 on May 30, 2012, 09:58:31 PM
UP- I felt like it was wrong to laugh, but I couldn't help myself! I am VERY immature, so anything having to do with "holes", "butts", etc.- is the funniest thing ever! :)
I just hope none of the Holes are offended by my amusement.
We all laugh (in shame ;D) when her name is mentioned. Even the rest of the Holes. Jacob was married to my sweet Irish Catholic Grandmother, Anna. They had 12 kids, who in turn, had an average of 4 kids each!. My cousin, who was also my tag-team partner, was named Roy
A. Hole - "A" HOLE! I used to bust his chops all the time, may he rest in peace.
I'm surprised Iona hasn't haunted me, yet!
Quote from: Unknown Primate on June 01, 2012, 12:43:23 AM
We all laugh (in shame ;D) when her name is mentioned. Even the rest of the Holes. Jacob was married to my sweet Irish Catholic Grandmother, Anna. They had 12 kids, who in turn, had an average of 4 kids each!. My cousin, who was also my tag-team partner, was named Roy A. Hole - "A" HOLE! I used to bust his chops all the time, may he rest in peace.
I'm surprised Iona hasn't haunted me, yet!
At least his first name wasn't Harold.
:laugh: Oh man! All this time and I didn't think of that!!
(http://www.patricksofpratt.com/Alice.jpg)
That's hilarious! Think how many folks will see that and not get it!
Darn, so does that mean we are old if we "get it"? Hilarious
Scatter - that is one of the funniest things I've ever seen!!!
I might have posted this before, but it just cracks me up everytime!
Robert De Niro's Frankenstein - by Caliendo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSIFqGJD5ow#)
(http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/1567/aa1e96c07b4e012f2fe0001.gif)
(http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/1445/tas120604.gif)
(https://fbcdn_sphotos_e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/185198_10150264704795945_5961327_n.jpg)
YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7082/7270817256_a76e994f35.jpg)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8003/7270824444_3c5747e8bd.jpg)
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7227/7270824454_bef9db970e.jpg)
LMAO, thanks, I needed that today.
Saw this magnet today in a Spencers Gifts in BelAir MD
WARNING SUGGESTIVE MATERIAL
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/Necro-1.jpg)
Great stuff guys. 8)
Amazing what you can do in the editing room...
http://www.vulture.com/2012/06/mrs-doubtfire-recut-as-a-horror-film.html (http://www.vulture.com/2012/06/mrs-doubtfire-recut-as-a-horror-film.html)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/179329_432167876803562_2137063188_n.jpg)
Not even close! Scatter's Alice Kramden on the moon has won this thread...lol that is faaaaaaaaaaaantastic!
Quote from: BlackLagoon on June 08, 2012, 11:09:37 PM
Not even close! Scatter's Alice Kramden on the moon has won this thread...lol that is faaaaaaaaaaaantastic!
TO THE MOON!
(http://img846.imageshack.us/img846/4458/nq120608.gif)
(http://img854.imageshack.us/img854/5766/crspe120608.gif)
HA! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Got to love those Sash - squatch jokes. Hey UP, do you have a UP costume that you wear for Halloween? Just curious? Your avatar looks like a cool statue or figure.
(http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii167/Kyrel-Dak/bowiespoon1.jpg)
Man, I miss the Far Side. And Calvin and Hobbes...
Quote from: Howler on June 08, 2012, 10:54:11 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/179329_432167876803562_2137063188_n.jpg)
lmfao.... omgoshhhhh.. thats fantastic
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/Mock_Altoids_Ad_by_asunder.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/maryjesushooters.jpg)
WARNING..... Sorry if this offends anyone...
but i find it hilarious...
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/1206.jpg)
Quote from: Opera Ghost on June 07, 2012, 09:02:14 PM
Saw this magnet today in a Spencers Gifts in BelAir MD
WARNING SUGGESTIVE MATERIAL
omgosh.. thats greattt... ;D ;D
(http://i882.photobucket.com/albums/ac27/rtezai/UMA%20database/Necro-1.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/cbl_0314.gif)
From this week's issue of The New Yorker:
(http://img818.imageshack.us/img818/8097/120604cartoon050a16599p.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/818/120604cartoon050a16599p.gif/)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/be_green_like_ed_gein_tshirt-p235368250216615706envm8_400.jpg)
Quote from: missdead13 on June 11, 2012, 12:30:34 AM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/be_green_like_ed_gein_tshirt-p235368250216615706envm8_400.jpg)
lol nice.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/564325_310472005709622_315625477_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/229822_311099998980156_1621618335_n.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/601014_311340582289431_219175836_n.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/75252_10151580785505377_2073626351_n.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/ad.jpg)
(http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/2756/tumblrm4ra5c0kol1qk91lx.jpg)
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/1817/scififantasylordoftheri.jpg)
And this is why I don't live near the ocean . . .
(http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/9194/of120605.gif)
Quote from: Fester on June 11, 2012, 11:10:31 PM
(http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/2756/tumblrm4ra5c0kol1qk91lx.jpg)
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/1817/scififantasylordoftheri.jpg)
And this is why I don't live near the ocean . . .
(http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/9194/of120605.gif)
OH MY GOSHHHHH... the "Multipass" thing is something Ive been sayin for years, {{whenever random situations arise & i say it.. lmao}}
this made me smile. thank you :)
You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... when the pastor says,
"I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," five guys and two
women stand up.
Quote from: Howler on June 11, 2012, 02:55:13 AM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/601014_311340582289431_219175836_n.jpg)
my daughters thought this was hilarious and stole it , to send to their friends .. lol
lol That's great MissD. ;D
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/537735_384642044926733_295422260_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/c67.0.403.403/p403x403/252645_10151032098150871_526496239_n.jpg)
It's how i see it at least. >:D
(http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/9729/partyfailsgettingouttat.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/17/partyfailsgettingouttat.jpg/)
Quote from: Howler on June 12, 2012, 06:17:39 PM
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/c67.0.403.403/p403x403/252645_10151032098150871_526496239_n.jpg)
It's how i see it at least. >:D
;D love it!!
Quote from: Fester on June 12, 2012, 09:54:36 PM
(http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/9729/partyfailsgettingouttat.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/17/partyfailsgettingouttat.jpg/)
lol..ive seen friends like that actually... eek. scary..
(http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/6585/nq120603.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/152/nq120603.jpg/)
You know Fester my friend, I have to copy and paste all your funnies and send them to my wife. She finds them h i l a r i o u s. You always come up with such great ones. Wish I could just get her to come on here and read them all but we won't go into that.
Quote from: Wolf Man on June 13, 2012, 12:49:52 AM
You know Fester my friend, I have to copy and paste all your funnies and send them to my wife. She finds them h i l a r i o u s. You always come up with such great ones. Wish I could just get her to come on here and read them all but we won't go into that.
i know you said " we wont go into that " re: your wife.. but that just seems sooo crazy
to me, as I cant stay away from this place. lol... some ppl are addicted to facebook. or online gaming, whatever.
this is what i do " online ".. ( well and Ebay sometimes :laugh:)
guess diff. strokes for diff. folks . shrugs. .
We have some really great people on this forum, some incredibly selfless generous ones at that and it can be a lot of fun but there are some who find fault with everything, always have the negative contrary view and think that every comment should be negative laced with sarcastic one liners and jabs. These are self absorbed, self important, self righteous miserable people who believe their opinion to be the only one that counts. What miserable people they are to be around with little respect for others. My wife is a very positive upbeat person and while there are many like that here she can't stand to read a single word from those others I mentioned so she stays away. Often makes me wonder how many other good people we loose because of a handful of bad apples who can't seem to say anything positive about much of anything. Nothing is ever said or done to curb that behavior either. That is all it is.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/389754_398658706838153_992595029_n.jpg)
Wow, it took me a minute to realize those are Segway's. So, I don't have to have the fastest Segway, mine just has to be faster than yours eh?
Wolf Man- You can tell the Mrs. that we have already seen her in her beautiful Victorian finery, and we would love for her to join in the fun :)
(http://www.halfthedeck.com/images/Paranoia.gif)
Christmas Songs for Shrinks
Schizophrenia: Do You Hear What I Hear?
Multiple Personality: We Three Queens Disoriented Are.
Narcissism: Hark! The Herald Angels Sing About Me!
Dementia: I Think I'll Be Home for Christmas.
Paranoia: Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me.
Mania: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town.
Depression: Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All is Flat, All is Lonely.
Personality Disorder: You Better Watch Out, I'm Going to Cry, I'm Going to Pout, then maybe I'll tell you why!
Obsessive Compulsive: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Swing, Jingle Bell Swing, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Swing, Jingle Bell Swing, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell Rock
Suicidal: Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
Passive Aggressive: On the First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me (then took away).
Sean -
LOVE the mental health cartoons.
maybe it helps if you have a background in mental health...lol.
Bizarro Jeff
Quote from: Bizarro Jeff on June 15, 2012, 05:45:50 AM
Sean -
LOVE the mental health cartoons.
maybe it helps if you have a background in mental health...lol.
Bizarro Jeff
That makes 2 of us, Jeff. ;D
(http://www.glasbergen.com/wp-content/gallery/mental/toon_115.gif)
A certain paranoid/psychiatric/delusional tone has invaded the thread Sean. ;) ;D
Quote from: Scatter on June 15, 2012, 09:24:49 PM
A certain paranoid/psychiatric/delusional tone has invaded the thread Sean. ;) ;D
WILL YOU GUYS STOP TALKING ABOUT ME?!?!?!?!?
(http://xaxor.com/images/other/11451/star_wars_demotivators_640_20.jpg)
Quote from: Scatter on June 15, 2012, 09:24:49 PM
A certain paranoid/psychiatric/delusional tone has invaded the thread Sean. ;) ;D
Dammit. I was going for something more subtle, like 'CREPT INTO'...
Are you watching me? You're WATCHING me!! ;)
Quote from: Scatter on June 15, 2012, 09:32:23 PM
(http://xaxor.com/images/other/11451/star_wars_demotivators_640_20.jpg)
I laughed at first, then I thought: 'Ohhh... they ruined a REALLY GOOD Darth Vader costume!!!' :'(
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/927/tas120613.gif)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/stalking_vs_real_life.png)
Quote from: missdead13 on June 16, 2012, 11:47:56 AM
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/stalking_vs_real_life.png)
That's really funny. Gotta wonder (and I know it happens) why would 'Sarah' put pictures of her pool party out there for public consumption? Yet, 'Sarah' does. *shaking head*
(http://img845.imageshack.us/img845/699/mgg20120606.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/845/mgg20120606.gif/)
(http://www.2dayblog.com/images/2011/october/550x-Werewolf.jpg)
Quote from: Sean on June 16, 2012, 02:30:28 PM
That's really funny. Gotta wonder (and I know it happens) why would 'Sarah' put pictures of her pool party out there for public consumption? Yet, 'Sarah' does. *shaking head*
Paraphilias .... Voyeurism , Exhibitionism , things like that. . THAT's why.. :laugh: :laugh:
Quote from: Sean on June 16, 2012, 09:05:24 PM
(http://www.2dayblog.com/images/2011/october/550x-Werewolf.jpg)
You can almost hear Abbott and Costello in there . . . :laugh:
Meanwhile, back in Metropolis:
(http://img839.imageshack.us/img839/4816/mgg20120612.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/839/mgg20120612.gif/)
LOL.........that is a great Superman strip....Kind of reminds me when they do him on Robot Chicken
Robot Chicken: Superman vs. Aquaman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tE46dXpAWY#)
Robot Chicken: I Got Suped (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xl0ETS7iaAA#ws)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/599217_10151108648030499_1656868676_n.jpg)
(http://img171.imageshack.us/img171/1056/realitycheck20120617.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/171/realitycheck20120617.jpg/)
Quote from: Howler on June 17, 2012, 06:49:48 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/599217_10151108648030499_1656868676_n.jpg)
;D ive never seen that before.. love it :laugh:
Two brothers, a 7 year old and a 4 year old, were lying on their beds waiting to fall asleep. The 7 year old, deeply contemplative, said to his brother, "You know, I think it's time we started swearing too. Mom and Dad do it, we see it on TV and the movies, all our friends do it. It must be OK."
The 4 year old agrees, and they decide that on the morrow they will unveil their new, more colorful vocabulary.
After awakening and seating themselves in their usual spots at the breakfast table, Mom asks the oldest, "What would you like for breakfast this morning dear?"
The little boy thinks for a moment, then responds "Aww s#!t mom, Corn Pops sounds good I guess." With the speed and ferocity of a rattler, Mom's hand lashes out and sends the boy sprawling across the kitchen floor where he lies in a sobbing mass.
Mom turns to the 4 year old, her eyes flashing, and says, "Do YOU have a special request for breakfast this morning too, young man?!"
The boy responds, "I'm not sure WHAT I want, but it sure the f#&k won't be Corn Pops."
Ok i was having the worst day today and was feeling in a grim mood but then i seen this and couldn't help but to laugh out loud. ;D
Get outa my way, you black bastard! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FjjwWVPWm70#)
Quote from: missdead13 on June 10, 2012, 06:18:29 PM
WARNING..... Sorry if this offends anyone...
but i find it hilarious...
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/1206.jpg)
Ha! Ha! Ha!
Snagged this off Facebook:
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Bob.jpg)
One of the comments was "Okay, lets paint some blood on the happy axe!"
I love Bob Ross and I love Frazetta. This thing rocks!!
(http://img809.imageshack.us/img809/1260/frankernest20120620.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/809/frankernest20120620.gif/)
Try to say that three times!
A lady with a prize-winning schnauzer figured that he was going deaf. He wouldn't come when she called. When she took him out for a walk he wouldn't heel like he had been taught to do. As a matter of fact, when the dog wasn't looking and she called him, he acted like he didn't hear her at all. So she took him to the vet.
The vet looked the dog over and gave him a complete physical. He told the lady, "There's nothing wrong with your dog at all. Look here. He has excessive hair growing in his ears, which led you to believe that he is deaf. He can't hear you, but he isn't deaf. You can treat this with a depilatory. I haven't got any in stock, but you can get some 'Neet' or 'Nair' at your local pharmacy. This will work just as well as the doggy brand will."
So the lady went to the nearest store and picked up a small bottle of Nair and looked over the instructions. There was nothing on the carton that related to her dog so she took it to the druggist and asked his advice.
"How do I apply this product," she asked. "Do I put it on right out of the bottle or do I dilute it or what?"
The druggist said, "For your legs, put it on straight. Right out of the bottle. For your underarms, I recommend that you dilute it 50-50 with water."
She said, "I don't think that you understand. It's for my schnauzer."
"Oh," said the druggist. "In that case, I suggest that you dilute it 3 to 1 with water. And by the way, you might want to wear cotton underwear for a few days."
Robot Chicken: Who is Booberry?! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i0OBpW1YwBE#)
Walking into the bar, Harvey said to the bartender, "Pour me a stiff one, Eddie. I just had another fight with the little woman."
"Oh yeah," said Eddie. "And how did this one end?"
"When it was over," Harvey replied, "she came to me on her hands and knees."
"Really? Now that's a switch! What did she say"?
"She said, 'Come out from under that bed, you gutless weasel!'" ::)
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?"
A guy with a huge orange head goes in to see a doctor.
The doctor says, "How did you get such a huge orange head?"
The guy says, "Well, one day I was walking down the beach when I tripped over an old lantern. A genie came out and said, I'll grant you three wishes, whatever you desire...what is your first wish?'
I said, I'd like all the money I could ever spend.' The genie went Poof!', and there it was, all the money I could ever spend.
Then he said, What is your second wish?' I said, I'd like a beautiful woman to love me, someone I could enjoy this money with.' The genie went Poof!', and there she was, a gorgeous girl who immediately loved me.
Then the genie said, "And what is your third wish?" ...and I think this is where I went wrong... I said, "I'd like a huge orange head."
Quote from: Fester on June 23, 2012, 12:39:53 AM
Walking into the bar, Harvey said to the bartender, "Pour me a stiff one, Eddie. I just had another fight with the little woman."
"Oh yeah," said Eddie. "And how did this one end?"
"When it was over," Harvey replied, "she came to me on her hands and knees."
"Really? Now that's a switch! What did she say"?
"She said, 'Come out from under that bed, you gutless weasel!'" ::)
lol ;D
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/179190_10151704875684897_1572048337_n.jpg)
(http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/5664/tas120622.gif)
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 15 miles per hour. He thinks to himself, "this driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"
So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies - two in the front seats and three in the back - wide eyed and white as ghosts.
The driver, obviously confused, says to him "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"
"Ma'am," the officer replies, "you weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Fifteen miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly.
The Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that 15 was the highway number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.
"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't made a peep this whole time," the officer asks.
"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Highway 101.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/s480x480/543237_391055030950694_229309798_n.jpg)
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7230/7270788168_f38198ffbd_b.jpg)
this dude cracks me up.
Dear John Witherspoon: "Hoochies" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX7-wAO4qGs#ws)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/394608_2925970567856_83683728_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on June 27, 2012, 07:13:47 PM
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/394608_2925970567856_83683728_n.jpg)
I
LOVE this!
"...please won't you be my victim."
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on June 27, 2012, 07:17:47 PM
I LOVE this!
"...please won't you be my victim."
Mr. Krueger's Neighborhood!!!!!!
Hi neighbor, you're looking kind of sleepy. Why don't you lay down for a little nap. I'd love to visit you in your dreams. Won't that be fun? Well, for me at least.
Little Johnny is taking a shower with his mother and says, "Mom, what are those things on your chest!?" Unsure of how to reply, she tells Johnny to ask his dad at breakfast tomorrow, quite certain the matter would be forgotten.
Johnny didn't forget. The following morning he asked his father the same question. His father, always quick with the answers, says, "Why Johnny, those are balloons. When your mommy dies, we can blow them up and she'll float to heaven." Johnny thinks that's neat and asks no more questions.
A few weeks later, Johnnys' dad comes home from work a few hours early. Johnny runs out of the house crying hysterically, "Daddy! Daddy! Mommy's dying!!" His father says, "Calm down son! Why do you think Mommy's dying?" "Uncle Harry is blowing up Mommys' balloons and she's screaming, "Oh God, I'm coming!"
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/529015_10151072659419042_547947706_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/206088_10151075386959042_731175102_n.jpg)
Those pictures are freaking awesome! I love to see original behind the scenes clowning around photos. I saw one once of Chaney as the Mummy with his head laying in a fridge trying to cool off.
I just love those.
Wolf Man:
Here are a couple for you. Enjoy!
(http://img823.imageshack.us/img823/3020/4369f8c759c44947b2aa2eb.jpg)
(http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/1046/benchapman.jpg)
And Now for Something Completely Different:
The Glasgow Repertory Theater presents its new production of The Seven Year Itch
(http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/9664/tumblrm5e958pqtx1r4sx6t.jpg)
Those are awesome Fester! How ironic, I just purchased the Gozilla collection and will get to watch in on my next day off, day after tomorrow. Now I won't be able to watch it without that image in my head and I will be laughing all the way through a serious horror film. Thanks! ;D
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/481908_10151070318812604_1115952838_n.jpg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lavzlakY4v1qbrdf3o1_500.jpg)
(http://www.moviediva.com/MD_root/MDimages/Copy_of_bridef6.jpg)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldqsssb6Oe1qaun7do1_500.jpg)
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/558663_10150841554155945_800919748_n.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/adedd.jpg)
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/frankensteinpancakes.gif)
I love this pic... I like how he's got a pic. of his girl in his truck. . and I imagine that
he's sayin on the CB " Love dead. . Hate Traffic "
(http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366/missdead1313/monstertrucker.jpg)
lol Great pics MissD. :D
That Godzilla picture is amazing! XD
Quote from: Howler on July 05, 2012, 10:27:19 AM
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/481908_10151070318812604_1115952838_n.jpg)
I want this on my freaking wall NOW!!!!
A late night discussion with a friend of mine led to me photoshopping these for her :P
(http://img84.imageshack.us/img84/5862/img07211s.jpg)
(http://img820.imageshack.us/img820/5198/img07201z.jpg)
(http://img577.imageshack.us/img577/254/img07221.jpg)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8428/7521467596_edab9c80f9_z.jpg)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on July 07, 2012, 12:06:54 PM
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8428/7521467596_edab9c80f9_z.jpg)
:laugh: :laugh:
A doctor vacationing on the Riviera met an old lawyer friend and asked him what he was doing there.
The lawyer replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I bought? Well, it caught fire, so here I am with the fire insurance proceeds. What are you doing here?"
The doctor replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I had in Mississippi? Well, the river overflowed, and here I am with the flood insurance proceeds."
The lawyer looked puzzled. "Gee," he asked, "how did you start the flood?"
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.
The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
What do you call skydiving lawyers?
Skeet!
How do you get a one armed blonde down out of a tree?
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
Wave!
Three blondes were walking through the woods they came across some tracks. The first blonde said "these are deer tracks". The second blonde said "no, these are moose tracks". The third blonde said "no, you're both wrong, these are horse tracks". While they were arguing over what kind of tracks they were, the train hit them.
A blonde, brunette and redhead were walking along the beach, when a seagull flies over and craps all over the blonde. The brunette says in a disgusted voice "hang on, the bathroom is just up the hill, I'll go get some toilet paper."
After she leaves the blonde begins to laugh. The redhead asks "what's so funny ?"
The blonde says "well, blondes are suppose to be so dumb and look at her, by the time she gets back with the toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!"
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on July 07, 2012, 12:06:54 PM
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8428/7521467596_edab9c80f9_z.jpg)
Soon as I seen this I almost spit my coffe out laughing, LOL.....
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on July 07, 2012, 03:45:12 PM
A blonde, brunette and redhead were walking along the beach, when a seagull flies over and craps all over the blonde. The brunette says in a disgusted voice "hang on, the bathroom is just up the hill, I'll go get some toilet paper."
After she leaves the blonde begins to laugh. The redhead asks "what's so funny ?"
The blonde says "well, blondes are suppose to be so dumb and look at her, by the time she gets back with the toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!"
That just happened to my aunt. I need to share this joke with her XD
A redneck was standing in the middle of the road yelling, "57! 57!" A blonde saw him doing this so she ran to the middle of the road and started yelling, "57! 57!".
A tractor trailer was coming down the road towards them at about 60 miles per hour, so the redneck jumped to the side of the road. The blonde, however, got hit by the truck and got smeared all over the road.
Then the redneck jumped back on the road and started yelling, "58! 58!"
Count Dracula walks into a local bar and says" Bartender, may I have a glass of water please?" The bartender, being very curious, gives the count a glass of water and asks the count, "What do you need with a glass of water? " The Count whips out a Blood covered, well used Tampon from under his coat and proceeds to drop it in the Glass of water...then he looks up at the Bartender and says..." I Thought I would make me a glass of Ice Tea this time...!!!"
(http://live.drjays.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/higg-boson-joke.jpg)
Thanks for the laughs, folks, I needed that today.
After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limo, (and he doesn't travel light), the driver notices the Pope still standing on the curb.
"Excuse me, Your Holiness," says the driver," Would you please take your seat so we can leave?"
"Well, to tell you the truth," says the Pope, "they never let me drive at the Vatican when I was a cardinal, and now that I'm Pope, I'd really like to drive today."
"I'm sorry, Your Holiness, but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! And what if something should happen?" protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.
"Who's going to tell?" says the Pope.
Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.
"Please slow down, Your Holiness!" pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens. "Oh, Dear, I'm gonna lose my license -- and my job!" moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio. "I need to talk to the Chief," he says to the dispatcher.
The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five.
"So bust him," says the Chief.
"I don't think we want to do that, he's really big," said the cop.
The Chief exclaimed," All the more reason!"
"No, I mean really important," said the cop with a bit of persistence.
The Chief then asked, "Who ya got there, the Mayor?"
Cop: "Bigger."
Chief: " The Governor?"
Cop: "Bigger."
Chief: "The President?"
Cop: "Bigger."
"Well," said the Chief, "Who is bigger than the President?"
Cop: "I'm not sure, but He's got the Pope as a chauffeur."
A pretty, young Kentucky girl told her Pa that she was pregnant by a guy named Clarence, who lived in Ohio. Pa loaded his pick-up with all his sons & nephews and headed for Ohio to "get that boy and whup his ass!".
Halfway there, he went under an overpass. Suddenly, he slammed on his brakes, skidded on the road and did a U-turn and started racing back towards Kentucky. The good ol' boys yelled, "What are you going back for?"
Pa replied, "To get your cousins - that sign said, CLARENCE: 14 feet 8 inches!!!
An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day, he went out in a bit of a hurry, and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun."
The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods, and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied, "No."
The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!"
"That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear."
"That's kind of what I'm getting at," replied the doctor.
:laugh:
Three men were discussing aging on the steps of the nursing home.
"Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old. "You always feel like you have to pee. And most of the time, you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out!"
"Ah, that's nothin'," said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you can't take a crap anymore. You take laxatives, eat bran, you sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"
"Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."
"Do you have trouble peeing too?" asked the 60-year-old.
"No...not really. I pee every morning at 6:00 am. I piss like a race horse; no problem at all."
"Do you have trouble taking a crap?" asked the 70-year-old.
"Well, not really. I have a great bowel movement every morning at 6:30 am."
With great exasperation, the 60-year-old said, "Let me get this straight. You pee every morning at 6:00 am and take a crap every morning at 6:30. What's so tough about being 80?"
To which the 80-year-old replied, "I don't wake up until 10:00 am."
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/528077_10151078802645266_288011526_n.jpg)
HA! Good one, H!
Quote from: Howler on July 08, 2012, 08:23:29 PM
(https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/528077_10151078802645266_288011526_n.jpg)
Funny but wish they would have used leather face
Quote from: horror1o1 on July 08, 2012, 11:51:04 PM
Funny but wish they would have used leather face
I was thinking the same thing :P Would've made a lot more sense. Or Ed Gein :P
Quote from: Dr. Blasko on July 08, 2012, 11:59:47 PM
I was thinking the same thing :P Would've made a lot more sense. Or Ed Gein :P
Ya i thought about him too. Still funny though.
another Ed Gein fan!
That would work if it were the Headless Horseman. But nobody thinks of him anymore... 8j68j68ju
Inappropriate Folgers Commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcs8d4OlJl4#)
Full Metal Skeletor (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFuw8u5xngo#)
(http://img535.imageshack.us/img535/5643/nursingposttextingworld.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/535/nursingposttextingworld.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on July 12, 2012, 01:01:22 AM
(http://img535.imageshack.us/img535/5643/nursingposttextingworld.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/535/nursingposttextingworld.jpg/)
I always picture this scenario & have talked to people about it, but
instead of the texting thing, I imagine it would be a ton of old old people
with a buncha tattoos ( alot of them sleeved even) , and lots of odd scars ,
holes and stretched out ear lobes. .
a realistic expectation I believe . :laugh:
give it . . 30 more years maybe ? if that?? ! lol
Yeah, like when gravity takes over and the bra size goes from 36-D to a 38-Long; and at the checkup, the doctor comments on the hideous bat tattoo. . . .which 30 years ago was a fairy. ::)
(http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/9808/of120712.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/29/of120712.gif/)
Quote from: Fester on July 12, 2012, 11:34:00 PM
Yeah, like when gravity takes over and the bra size goes from 36-D to a 38-Long; and at the checkup, the doctor comments on the hideous bat tattoo. . . .which 30 years ago was a fairy. ::)
(http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/9808/of120712.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/29/of120712.gif/)
And what will be the music piped into the dayrooms? Hip Hop? ::)
Quote from: Fester on July 12, 2012, 11:34:00 PM
Yeah, like when gravity takes over and the bra size goes from 36-D to a 38-Long; and at the checkup, the doctor comments on the hideous bat tattoo. . . .which 30 years ago was a fairy. ::)
(http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/9808/of120712.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/29/of120712.gif/)
Fester, you kill me. Luv you man! You keep me in stitches.
Glad you like 'em Wolf Man!
Sally goes to work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss, concerned for his employee, walks over to her and asks sympathetically, "What's the matter?" The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call that my mother had passed away."
The boss, feeling very sorry at this point suggests to the young girl, "Why don't you go home for the day...we aren't terribly busy. Just take the day off and go relax."
Sally very calmly states, "No I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind busy and I have the best chance of doing that here."
The boss agrees and allows her to work as usual. "If you need anything just let me know" says the boss.
A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on Sally. He looks out his office and sees her crying hysterically.
He rushes over an asks, "What's the matter now? Are you going to be ok?"
Sally breaks down in tears. "I just received a horrible call from my sister. She said that her mom died too!!"
One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BAS**RD!!!!"
As someone of Irish heritage... that last one is very true XD
Okay, I got one: an Irishman walks out of a bar-- no, really, it COULD happen!
(http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/9392/crspe120711.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/152/crspe120711.gif/)
Considering the species and talents of many of our members, I find that to be the most appropriate post ever made in this thread.
Handmade... ;)
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/test_159.png)
HA! Love the shadow rabbit!
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/bear.jpg)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/typewriter.jpg)
(http://img109.imageshack.us/img109/4763/of120716.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/109/of120716.gif/)
I like the teddy bear one.
God bless our teddy bears!!
I don't have a teddy bear on my bed to protect me.
But I do have Dracula, Frankenstein, His Bride, Gill-Man, Wolf Man, and the Mummy :laugh: No BAD monsters want to face them!
Good Ol' Days! ;D
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/tilt.jpg)
Quote from: Caveman on July 17, 2012, 01:13:13 PM
Good Ol' Days! ;D
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/tilt.jpg)
To the parent: PUT THE CAMERA DOWN!
Quote from: Caveman on July 17, 2012, 01:13:13 PM
Good Ol' Days! ;D
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/tilt.jpg)
reminds me of george carlins bit about this exact topic :D
Cheers! ;)
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/test_163.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on July 16, 2012, 02:14:57 AM
(http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/9392/crspe120711.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/152/crspe120711.gif/)
If I had a nickel for every time I've said THAT...........
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/552478_10151121126329042_262109187_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/555655_467941899906252_1474327561_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 19, 2012, 07:13:45 AM
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/555655_467941899906252_1474327561_n.jpg)
:laugh: love it .
Feels about right . . .
(http://img196.imageshack.us/img196/7580/nq120719.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/196/nq120719.gif/)
Man I love language humor XD
(http://www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Rob/stds.png)
Quote from: Dr. Blasko on July 19, 2012, 12:22:19 PM
Man I love language humor XD
(http://www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Rob/stds.png)
HAHAHA! I love that one. It cracked me up
I'm such a huge fan of C&H. Sometimes highly offensive, but usually always clever.
This is excerpted from an actual news article published 7-16-2012:
ONE DAY AT THE AIRPORT
Turns out it's legal to have a weapon of mass conception at the airport.
Jonah Falcon was stopped and frisked by the TSA at the San Francisco International Airport on July 9 because of a bulging package hidden in his pants. But the 41-year-old New Yorker wasn't packing a dirty bomb, drugs or a Costco-sized tube of toothpaste.
Falcon said he knew that his interview was about to get a lot more personal when he was led through one of the X-ray body scanners and passed a metal detector.
"Another guard stopped me and asked me if I had some sort of growth," Falcon said, laughing.
Indeed he did have a growth.
The New Yorker has the world's largest recorded penis.
"I had my 'stuff' strapped to the left. I wasn't erect at the time," said Falcon, whose penis is 9 inches flaccid, 13.5 inches erect. "One of the guards asked if my pockets were empty and I said, 'Yes.'"
By the age of 18, Falcon knew he had something special when his manhood reached a whopping 12 inches. His family jewel was hailed as the world's largest on record after an HBO documentary featured him in 1999.
The Guinness Book of World Records does not record such feats.
I should have such problems.
I can honestly say that has never happened to me... yet.
TO THE LAB!
Quote from: Fester on July 19, 2012, 12:10:46 PM
Feels about right . . .
(http://img196.imageshack.us/img196/7580/nq120719.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/196/nq120719.gif/)
which is why i stay home and watch OLD movies .
all hail TCM. ;D
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on July 19, 2012, 03:20:11 PM
This is excerpted from an actual news article published 7-16-2012:
ONE DAY AT THE AIRPORT
Turns out it's legal to have a weapon of mass conception at the airport.
Jonah Falcon was stopped and frisked by the TSA at the San Francisco International Airport on July 9 because of a bulging package hidden in his pants. But the 41-year-old New Yorker wasn't packing a dirty bomb, drugs or a Costco-sized tube of toothpaste.
Falcon said he knew that his interview was about to get a lot more personal when he was led through one of the X-ray body scanners and passed a metal detector.
"Another guard stopped me and asked me if I had some sort of growth," Falcon said, laughing.
Indeed he did have a growth.
The New Yorker has the world's largest recorded penis.
"I had my 'stuff' strapped to the left. I wasn't erect at the time," said Falcon, whose penis is 9 inches flaccid, 13.5 inches erect. "One of the guards asked if my pockets were empty and I said, 'Yes.'"
By the age of 18, Falcon knew he had something special when his manhood reached a whopping 12 inches. His family jewel was hailed as the world's largest on record after an HBO documentary featured him in 1999.
The Guinness Book of World Records does not record such feats.
I should have such problems.
oh geez.. hahahaa ::)
Quote from: missdead13 on July 19, 2012, 06:10:56 PM
oh geez.. hahahaa ::)
So I take it that's never happened to you? ;D
Quote from: Dr. Blasko on July 19, 2012, 06:32:46 PM
So I take it that's never happened to you? ;D
Probably not.
I'm pretty sure Missdead is a girl. ::)
Quote from: Fester on July 19, 2012, 11:19:24 PM
Probably not.
I'm pretty sure Missdead is a girl. ::)
That's the joke :P
Quote from: missdead13 on July 19, 2012, 06:10:02 PM
which is why i stay home and watch OLD movies .
all hail TCM. ;D
exactly!
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/s480x480/255200_463495833668115_1518780212_n.jpg)
(http://img36.imageshack.us/img36/5743/050812.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 21, 2012, 09:19:01 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/s480x480/255200_463495833668115_1518780212_n.jpg)
:laugh: :laugh: amen!!
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/jokes.jpg)
Richard ;)
That is a good one, we could all use a good laugh for today.
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/545443_425009160875902_466001745_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 24, 2012, 06:19:33 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/545443_425009160875902_466001745_n.jpg)
Where did you find that? Is there a higher res scan? That is great!!
Quote from: Howler on July 24, 2012, 06:19:33 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/545443_425009160875902_466001745_n.jpg)
WHOA!!!! LOVE THAT!!
That would look great framed on a wall.
Quote from: Illoman on July 24, 2012, 06:52:48 PM
Where did you find that? Is there a higher res scan? That is great!!
I took it from a page on Facebook called I love Monsters. When I did a search on Google the same picture came up. No luck with a higher res.
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/482109_404425806280283_2126006708_n.jpg)
Lets just combine two of the best things ever...
(http://poorlydressed.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/fashion-fail-i-wouldnt-fool-you-youre-my-favorite-deputy.jpg)
This character at Disneyland
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/DSC02226.jpg)
Inspired me to do this.
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/TwighlightMickey1.jpg)
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/TwighlightMickey2.jpg)
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/TwighlightMickey3.jpg)
Quote from: Haunted hearse on July 25, 2012, 02:37:23 PM
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/DSC02226.jpg)
I Mickey packing a gat - Or, is he just happy to see you?
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/530242_10150983705440765_1155009216_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/399532_10151145335764042_2084802821_n.jpg)
(http://img99.imageshack.us/img99/7485/070212.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/99/070212.jpg/)
The three finalists in the Women's Olympic swim meet were all novices to international competition. However, all had excelled during the early going, and after several heats the score was tied; the first match employing the breast stroke would decide the winner. The gun sounded, and the three young women dove into the water. Nancy finished first, crossing the pool in five seconds flat; Jean finished less than half a second later. Bringing up the rear was Mary, a blonde, who finished a full ten seconds after the others. As she completed the lap and climbed from the pool, she sputtered, "I protest! The other women were using their arms!"
So often I find true news items so much funnier than any gag made up by a comedy writer.
Adding Insult:
http://now.msn.com/man-charged-with-illegally-feeding-gator-that-bit-off-his-hand (http://now.msn.com/man-charged-with-illegally-feeding-gator-that-bit-off-his-hand)
T shirts for plumbers....
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/download-1.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 29, 2012, 05:35:12 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/399532_10151145335764042_2084802821_n.jpg)
Man, those bring back some serious memories!! I've got a set of those around here somewhere........gotta dig those up!
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on July 30, 2012, 07:54:19 PM
So often I find true news items so much funnier than any gag made up by a comedy writer.
Adding Insult:
http://now.msn.com/man-charged-with-illegally-feeding-gator-that-bit-off-his-hand (http://now.msn.com/man-charged-with-illegally-feeding-gator-that-bit-off-his-hand)
I say we all give Wallace Weatherholt a big hand for surviving the attack!
I hate Star Trek, but this is funny. lol
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/283784_363946080341304_320795216_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/428934_362197960520919_550491927_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 31, 2012, 05:52:06 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/428934_362197960520919_550491927_n.jpg)
That's so adorably hilarious!
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/s480x480/561701_10151325944234988_954798908_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/483896_432752130103082_1740564150_n.jpg)
Quote from: Howler on July 31, 2012, 08:32:22 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/483896_432752130103082_1740564150_n.jpg)
Shouldn't that be cinnamon-flavored "Cinna-Bites"?
Quote from: Howler on July 31, 2012, 05:27:56 PM
I hate Star Trek, but this is funny. lol
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/283784_363946080341304_320795216_n.jpg)
Hate.........Star.........Trek? Surely you mean "Hate Star
WARS"?
I hate the fans of both, myself XD
Even if you love Star Trek, that poster was funny.
Quote from: Scatter on July 31, 2012, 10:22:00 PM
Hate.........Star.........Trek? Surely you mean "Hate Star WARS"?
No, I said it right the first time.
(http://img842.imageshack.us/img842/7825/nq120801.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/842/nq120801.gif/)
Quote from: Howler on August 01, 2012, 07:12:29 AM
No, I said it right the first time.
Don't tell me you
LIKE Star Wars?? UGH!! ;D BTW, that poster is hilarious!!
Quote from: Scatter on August 01, 2012, 05:16:07 PM
Don't tell me you LIKE Star Wars?? UGH!! ;D BTW, that poster is hilarious!!
Love Star Wars.......The original trilogy that is.....non special editions.
Speaking of Star Wars...
(http://i279.photobucket.com/albums/kk155/bewarethecreeper4/315299_3334364050335_108579358_n.jpg)
(http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/926/parabdlowebigfootvolley.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/69/parabdlowebigfootvolley.jpg/)
If you don't follow Parabnormal you're missing some great stuff!
http://www.paraabnormalthecomic.com/ (http://www.paraabnormalthecomic.com/)
(http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/6334/synchronizedtweetingoly.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/19/synchronizedtweetingoly.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on August 02, 2012, 11:01:06 PM
(http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/6334/synchronizedtweetingoly.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/19/synchronizedtweetingoly.jpg/)
This made me wonder who does tweet the most. Apparently it's Indonesia :P
http://mashable.com/2012/01/09/tweets-by-country/ (http://mashable.com/2012/01/09/tweets-by-country/)
(http://img502.imageshack.us/img502/6779/of120803.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/502/of120803.gif/)
Dave - these are great! Nice to have some late-night laughs!
Awesome posts, everyone! Admiral Snackbar hit me just riiiight! I couldn't stop my laughter :) And the proctologist sign......I can only imagine its beauty.
A fellow went into a pharmacy and asked for a vial of Cyanide.
The pharmacist, trying to keep a professional posture, asked what he wanted it for.
He answered, "I want to kill my wife."
"I'm sorry Sir," the pharmacist replied, "but you will have to understand that under such circumstances, I can't sell you any Cyanide."
The guy reaches into his wallet and produces a photo of his wife.
The pharmacist blushes and replies, "I am sorry, sir, I didn't realize you had a prescription."
;)
A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, 'If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.'
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, 'Stop ! Stand still ! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.'
The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.. The man asked. 'Who are you?'
'I am your guardian angel,' the voice answered.
'Oh, yeah?' the man said 'And where the hell were you when I got married?
::)
A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale '. He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.
'You talk?' he asks.
'Yep,' the Lab replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'
he Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA.
In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'
'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.
But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger, so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.'
'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
'Ten dollars,' the guy says.
'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'
'Because he's a liar. He's never been out of the yard'
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/406251_504721506223974_1055866473_n.jpg)
(http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/9646/committingsuicidethefun.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/39/committingsuicidethefun.jpg/)
(http://4.asset.soup.io/asset/3550/1108_fe63_450.jpeg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8boa4zjeP1qhh6s8o1_400.jpg)
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/08/07/article-0-146D6741000005DC-76_634x568.jpg)
(http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j7/GoneFission/MarsfirstpictureCurosity.jpg)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/marvin-sign.jpg)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/alien-sign.jpg)
(http://shewalkssoftly.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/tumblr_m06j6chutr1qa7kygo1_500.png?w=450)
Someone call Ben Stein! That dude needs that Clear Eyes stuff!!
(http://api.ning.com/files/Krh3O7t4Efb*q8pvR-S-NLIZ-Ng2O9fU7BR1QV2LHrZ6suyjvT3YDf-hggIE3YB0i933PGuYYnr0JqDc4kLf3b0ZLy7Qg-5d/bdaycard.png?width=425&height=600)
I found this hilarous.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ePlXn7CQorQ#at=13 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ePlXn7CQorQ#at=13)
Truth In Adverstising:
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8424/7798176794_6996220935_b.jpg)
Phun Phacts:
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
One human hair can support 6.6 pounds.
The average man's penis is two times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as their brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women will be finished reading this by now.
Men are still busy checking their thumbs.
I'm just hitchhiking - honest!
They have been playing 24/7 tracks on the Elvis Radio channel on SIRIUS Radio - He was awesome, I always liked his 1970s stuff the most
Drugstore Diagnosis
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."
So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the drugstore. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.
Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Pain Management
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.
Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mothers pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. they were both very much in favor of it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10%, for starters, explaning that even 10% was probably more pain the father had ever experienced before. However, as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and "kick it up a notch."
The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husbands blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing at this point, they decided to try for 50%. the husband continued to feel quite well.
Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby boy with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home, they found the mail man dead on the porch.
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/540400_10150998927076301_1779011676_n.jpg)
A little surprise:
(http://vista-wallpaper.org/wp-content/gallery/funny-pictures/funniest-picture.jpg)
A BIG surprise:
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8444/7805864368_4b0cc9484c_z.jpg)
(http://img201.imageshack.us/img201/4891/crspe120815.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/201/crspe120815.gif/)
These are real book covers.
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/17.jpg)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/15.jpg)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/photo-3.jpg)
(http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/4016/072012.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/526/072012.jpg/)
(http://img191.imageshack.us/img191/7829/13455743820.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/191/13455743820.jpg/)
(http://cdn1.lostateminor.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Bar-stool.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/a_560x0.jpg)
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/the_simpsons_x_breaking_bad_by_adn_z-d56kosi.jpg)
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/574541_10151046133893019_387434232_n.jpg)
Just Discovered!
Executors of Thomas Kinkade's Estate have discovered a couple more original works by The Painter of Light!
And just think how great they will look over the sofa!
(http://img844.imageshack.us/img844/7199/cthulhuvsthomaskinkade.jpg)
(http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/4741/13455361670.jpg)
With all the electrical equipmetn in Dr. Frankenstein's lab, think what Kincaid could have done painting that!
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/7006/crspe120827.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/841/crspe120827.gif/)
Quote from: Fester on August 27, 2012, 05:26:01 PM
Just Discovered!
Executors of Thomas Kinkade's Estate have discovered a couple more original works by The Painter of Light!
And just think how great they will look over the sofa!
(http://img844.imageshack.us/img844/7199/cthulhuvsthomaskinkade.jpg)
(http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/4741/13455361670.jpg)
These would look awesome over my couch!
(http://cache2.allpostersimages.com/p/LRG/60/6003/OOBB100Z/prints/gahan-wilson-i-ll-check-and-see-if-he-s-available-new-yorker-cartoon.jpg)
MAN, you guys are getting some good stuff!!
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8299/7884063054_cb930896c5_z.jpg)
O Fortuna Misheard Lyrics (Animated) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIwrgAnx6Q8#)
One of my favorites....ENJOY!
The Three Stooges: Moe larry curly "Swinging the Alphabet" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pP3VAtGLQms#)
(http://img211.imageshack.us/img211/396/13466028920.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/211/13466028920.jpg/)
Posted by George Takei on his Facebook page, with the comment, "I'm sure parents everywhere are on borg with this."
It was the first day of Third Grade in a new town for Little Johnny. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn't get past 20. Johnny, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes.
He was so excited that he ran home and told his Dad how well he had done. His Dad nodded and told him, "That's because you are from Alabama, Son."
The next day, in language class, the teacher asked the students to recite the alphabet. It's Grade Three, so most could make it half way through without much trouble. Some made it to S or T, but Little Johnny rattled off the alphabet perfectly right to the end.
That evening, Johnny once again bragged to his Dad about his prowess in his new school. His Dad, knowingly, explained to him, "That's because you are from Alabama, Son."
The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking showers. Johnny noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly "well-endowed".
This confused him. That night he told his dad, "Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because I'm from Alabama?" he asked.
"No, Son," explained his Dad, "That's because you're 18."
>:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Booooooooooooo :P
Bit of a read, but worth it!! ;D
HOW TO START A FIGHT
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift...
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.....
______________________________
My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'
'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started...
________________________________
I took my wife to a restaurant.
The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"
"Nah, she can order for herself."
And that's when the fight started.....
________________________________
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she
kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed,
"He's my old boyfriend.... I understand he took to drinking right after we
split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
And then the fight started...
________________________________
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer.. Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
________________________________
My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Dust."
And then the fight started...
________________________________
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and
slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and
proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
And that's how the fight started...
________________________________
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds."
I bought her a bathroom scale.
And then the fight started......
________________________________
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application..
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office...
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
And then the fight started...
________________________________
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect!
And then the fight started...
great stuff mike i am still laughing :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/539034_10151413084784988_1231277088_n.jpg)
Wow. Jason's almost as versatile as Keanu Reeves. ;D
Quote from: FACTO2 on September 07, 2012, 03:00:06 AM
Wow. Jason's almost as versatile as Keanu Reeves. ;D
Bad comparison, Jason can act.
(http://img854.imageshack.us/img854/3888/of120911.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/854/of120911.gif/)
I don't know what I would do without this topic! Fester, sadly I have seen that battle take place in my own closet.....it was over 15 years ago, but it seems like yesterday. I lost a great sweater that day. The moth entered a pocket on my defenseless cardigan, and the results were horrible. But your comic helped me get the closure I needed......thank you
http://s257.photobucket.com/albums/hh225/Jeff_McIntosh/?action=view¤t=cl120906.gif (http://s257.photobucket.com/albums/hh225/Jeff_McIntosh/?action=view¤t=cl120906.gif)
Zombies!
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/304634_10151427564139988_397797048_n.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img42/4268/tumblrm2lrotkpnf1qbrubl.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/42/tumblrm2lrotkpnf1qbrubl.jpg/)
Two great white sharks swimming in the ocean spied survivors of a shipwreck.
"Follow me son," the older shark said to the younger one and they swam to the mass of people.
"First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing."
And they did.
"Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few times with all of our fins showing."
And they did.
"Now we eat everybody."
And they did.
When they were both gorged, the younger shark asked, "Why didn't we just eat them all at first? Why did we swim around and around them?"
The elder shark replied, "Because they taste better when there is no poop inside!"
Redneck LOTTO winner:
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8445/7997221027_0fa75e03b5.jpg)
14 Moronic Comments You Shouldn't Make at a Funeral
by: Drew Weisholtz
The dearly departed is supposed to be the star of the show when you go to a funeral, so common sense dictates you keep quiet and not do anything to stand out.
If you want to make sure you blend in as seamlessly as a tissue and a black outfit, we've come up with a handy dandy list of things you should avoid uttering. You can thank us later.
1. "Can you keep the crying down? I'm trying to hear the eulogy."
2. "This day just got even worse. I just found out the hearse doesn't have a stocked mini bar."
3. "Does anyone know if they validate parking?"
4. "I don't know why everyone is so sad. It's not like this was a surprise, considering how much he smoked."
5. "I didn't realize I was supposed to wear a suit."
6. "Ooh, I've got to take this call."
7. "Rest in peace, my butt."
8. "I don't know why they buried him in a suit. He's going to be pretty warm in that where he's going."
9. "Does anybody else wanna order a pizza?"
10. "Enough of these people talking, already. Let's get on with the reading of the will."
11. "I'd be honored to be a pallbearer. How much does that pay?"
12. "I'm starting a petition to cancel the wake and replace it with a toga party."
13. "Black is so cliche. That's why I'm wearing glow in the dark neon red-and-green polka dots."
14. "You think 'The Voice' is better than 'American Idol?' Let's go outside and settle this like men."
;D "I'm not sure, but I think I saw the body move!"
I also found out it is considered poor taste to have your dog "play dead" at the graveside service.
Long story . . . ::)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/12/9/12/rz8MBjBSj0qk5o9FvLu-BQ2.gif)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8299/8005326755_f1a6d556c6.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/8005326755/)
Funny-Cartoon-Posters-11-XB0SLQRQH8 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/8005326755/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/Circus2.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img22/296/tas121002.gif)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img404/6199/crspe121005.gif)
YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8313/8059059950_e51841d9a7_b.jpg)
Honey... The City installed that street light you've been bugging them about!
This might be too political. If so, mods please delete. But I found it funny as hell...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi595aKnLUk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi595aKnLUk)
Quote from: FACTO2 on October 07, 2012, 01:21:07 AM
This might be too political. If so, mods please delete. But I found it funny as hell...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi595aKnLUk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi595aKnLUk)
My light pole picture is political - just not aimed at anyone in particular.
This seems way too specific for the UMA. (For the record, I am for the
other guy, I just don't want us going down that path.)
At the risk of getting political . . .
This is the only party that has my full support:
(http://imageshack.us/a/img15/9920/campaignposter500.png)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img405/7141/andycorn.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/405/andycorn.jpg/)
LOL. :)
Halloween treat for my UMA family
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/lucyb.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img248/8928/of121010.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/248/of121010.gif/)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img692/469/of121011ew.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/692/of121011ew.gif/)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/9779.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/countmotivator.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/blade-blade-twilight-demotivational-poster-1248499527.jpg)
This one cracks me up!
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/424149_370751839609901_309110829107336_1338724_1288946977_n.jpg)
Here is the reason Wolverine was not in the Avengers
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/tumblr_m3zicxcxp11qldtw8o1_500.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/tumblr_lgokv6IBQY1qcle87o1_500-1.jpg)
LOL! Good ones, Mike!
The reason for Godzilla's years of rage finally revealed!
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/tumblr_l5f8yp67NS1qb30iko1_500.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/jet-jaguars-thumbs-jet-jaguar-thumbs-megalon-demotivational-posters-1346389960-1.jpg)
Jason and Michael on a day off (notice the hand in the bait bucket)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/tumblr_m3664cYKFj1qldtw8o1_1280-1.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/pokerscan-1.jpg)
Overture Curtain Lights!
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/tumblr_lnlke8pu561qlq12ko1_1280-1.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/kirk-haiku-kirk-star-trek-kahn-demotivational-poster-1252528010-1.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img33/1750/tas121012.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/33/tas121012.gif/)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img706/7068/13503769980.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/706/13503769980.jpg/)
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/304348_10152041731668475_1235550975_n.jpg)
(http://media.parentsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/92245124.jpg)
The look on that baby's face says it all!
Quote from: Gillfan on November 04, 2012, 03:24:44 PM
(http://media.parentsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/92245124.jpg)
That poor kid........and yet I can't stop laughing. lol
(http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/photoshop/3/8/4/143384_v1.jpg)
LOL
Yeah. Liked that one too. :)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/374451_438062076256511_1018959029_n.jpg)
That is awesome, Howler!
Check out this video - it's a scream! Some bad words abound, so beware! This is funny, though!
Halloween Cinema Scares '10 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFQJh-7Yr-E#ws)
Pity the poor janitor who had to clean up the foyer after the show.
Yeah, really! Plus, the movie goers paid for those concession snacks!
(http://imageshack.us/a/img651/3945/tas121117.gif)
Quote from: Unknown Primate on December 02, 2012, 08:26:58 PM
That is awesome, Howler!
Check out this video - it's a scream! Some bad words abound, so beware! This is funny, though!
Halloween Cinema Scares '10 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFQJh-7Yr-E#ws)
LOL!!! That was great! 8j68j68ju
(http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/1967/candycanesnake.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/515/candycanesnake.jpg/)
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/General%20Album%202/Faceless.jpg)
;D
Quote from: Fester on December 05, 2012, 02:41:04 AM
(http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/1967/candycanesnake.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/515/candycanesnake.jpg/)
Haaaaaaa!!!!!
Bored?
Try a couple of these time wasters:
http://now.msn.com/time-on-their-hands-leads-to-some-crazy-projects (http://now.msn.com/time-on-their-hands-leads-to-some-crazy-projects)
(http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/398318_459769147412615_2059521682_n.jpg)
A Swiss man, on holiday in Dublin, needed directions. He was standing outside Davy Byrne's pub when he saw two youths walking by so he stops them and asks, 'Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?'
The two lads look at each other blankly and stare back at him.
'Excusez-moi, parlez vous Français?' He tries.
The two continue to stare.
'Parlare Italiano?' Still absolutely no response from the two lads.
'Hablan ustedes Espanol?' The Dublin lads remain totally silent.
The Swiss guy walks off extremely disappointed and downhearted that he had not been understood. One of the boys turns to the second and says, 'Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language!'
'Why?' says the youth, 'That guy knew four languages, and it didn't do him any good!'
Superfriends meets Friends (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khGUPEdY-Fk#)
I can't believe I only recently found this thread....Fester: Your jokes are fantastic! I recently started a thread on the UMA entitled "Monster Jokes". For those of you that can tell a good joke with a horror or monster theme, please stop by and tell one.
For now, I will leave you with a non monster/horror joke (just a plain horrible joke).
What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public??
A private tutor!
Quote from: CreepysFan on December 14, 2012, 05:17:28 PM
Superfriends meets Friends (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khGUPEdY-Fk#)
WOW!
How many Goth kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all sit in the dark and like to cry.
Ole is sitting on the front porch of his house in the country, when he sees a cloud of dust up the road. He watches a farmer approaching, with a wagon. "Good afternoon!" hollers out Ole. "Afternoon," says Sven. "Vhere you headed?" asks Ole. "Home to my farm." "Vhat do you have in da wagon?" Ole continued."Manure," said Sven. "Manure, eh? What do you do wit it?" "I spread it over my strawberries," Sven says matter-of-factly. "Vell," says Ole, "ya should come over here for lunch someday. Ve use whipped cream."
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/reindeer_zps32d82028.jpg)
Quote from: CreepysFan on December 14, 2012, 05:17:28 PM
Superfriends meets Friends (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khGUPEdY-Fk#)
lol Too funny! ;D
A group of seniors were sitting around talking about all their ailments.
"My arms have gotten so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one.
"Yes, I know," said another. "My cataracts are so bad; I can't even see my coffee."
"I couldn't even mark an "X" at election time, my hands are so crippled," volunteered a third.
"What? Speak up! What? I can't hear you!
"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck," said a fourth, to which several nodded weakly in agreement.
"My blood pressure pills make me so dizzy!" exclaimed another.
"I forget where I am, and where I'm going," said another.
"I guess that's the price we pay for getting old," winced an old man as he slowly shook his head.
The others nodded in agreement.
"Well, count your Blessings," said a woman cheerfully - - "thank God we can all still drive"
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/17744_451718981555574_1118680006_n.jpg)
Ole is sitting at home alone when he hears a knock on the front door.
There are two sheriff's deputies there.
He asks if there is a problem.
One of the deputies asks if he is married, and if so, can he see a picture of his wife.
Ole says "sure" and shows him a picture of his wife, Lena.
The sheriff says, "I'm sorry sir, but it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
Ole says, " I know, but she has a great personality and is an excellent cook. "
Ole had been slipping in and
out of a coma for several months.
Yet Lena had stayed by his bedside every single day.
One day, when he came to,
he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he whispered,
eyes full of tears, 'You know vat?
You have been vith me all tru da bad times.
Ven I got fired, you vere dare to support me.
Ven my business failed, you vere dare.
Ven I got shot, you vere by my side.
Ven we lost da house, you stayed right here.
Ven my health started failing, you vere still by my side...
You know vhat Lena?'
'What dear?' she gently asked,
smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
'I'm beginning to tink you're bad luck....'
(http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/photoshop/5/6/2/45562_slide.jpg?v=1)
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal,they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip.
When leaving, the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses on the table, and she didn't miss them until they had been driving about forty minutes. By then, to add to the aggravation, they had to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around, in order to return to the restaurant to retrieve her glasses.
All the way back, the elderly husband became the classic grouchy old man. He fussed and complained, and scolded his wife relentlessly during the entire return drive. The more he chided her, the more agitated he became. He just wouldn't let up one minute. To her relief, they finally arrived at the restaurant.
As the woman got out of the car, and hurried inside to retrieve her glasses, the old geezer yelled to her, 'While you're in there, you might as well get my hat and the credit card.'
From the pages of the current issue of MAD magazine....Happy Holidays everyone!
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b352/Gasport2000/MADmagBrideofFrankycartonn12-12_zps70a538d9.jpg)
For those of you returning to work today:
HUMOR IN THE WORKPLACE
Eerie
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8215/8311253582_1de6b9d0f8_b.jpg)
Subtle
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8356/8311253654_26243b2aaa_b.jpg)
Noisy
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8504/8311226744_fd1bce7dc9_z.jpg)
Here is the complete slide show:
http://now.msn.com/funny-office-prank-ideas (http://now.msn.com/funny-office-prank-ideas)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/15924_439195822812526_702954438_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/148944_393922474026299_1201701543_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gasport on December 24, 2012, 09:49:00 PM
From the pages of the current issue of MAD magazine....Happy Holidays everyone!
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b352/Gasport2000/MADmagBrideofFrankycartonn12-12_zps70a538d9.jpg)
HA!!
That's great! LOVE it!
I still have the 45 of this record! Cracks me up everytime. The wife? Well, she gives me "the look" when I sing it throughout the house (which I do a few times a week ;)).
Mark IV - I Got A Wife (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-GGia_Jui0#)
Natural Blonde
Blonde girl's 1st "Trust Fall":
http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=9&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/61ef99ec-7d6b-4d1a-8380-2e013d971cfc (http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=9&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/61ef99ec-7d6b-4d1a-8380-2e013d971cfc)
Drive Thru Invisible Driver Prank (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVrJ8DxECbg#ws)
HAD TO PLAY UP's SONG LINK WHERE THE WIFE COULD HEAR
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/dhome_zps56c00f02.jpg)
Quote from: BigShadow on January 10, 2013, 11:08:17 PM
Drive Thru Invisible Driver Prank (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVrJ8DxECbg#ws)
lol Nice!
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Poe.jpg)
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/image-1.jpg)
;D ;D
(http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/9682/of130114.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/853/of130114.gif/)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/181114_469967919729627_762160425_n.jpg)
This will either make you laugh or horrify you - or both:
http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/25fd3de9-620d-cdb6-7ba3-689dd7b56a6c (http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/25fd3de9-620d-cdb6-7ba3-689dd7b56a6c)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on January 24, 2013, 08:09:56 PM
This will eaither make you laugh or horrify you - or both:
http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/25fd3de9-620d-cdb6-7ba3-689dd7b56a6c (http://entertainment.msn.com/videopreview/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod&form=msnrll#/video/25fd3de9-620d-cdb6-7ba3-689dd7b56a6c)
That kid drives the loader better than some of the adult drivers I encounter on the road.
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/530772_465197833529798_1835232112_n.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-152426413jpg.jpg)
HELP!!!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/tumblr_maw2avrGFf1ru4yb7o1_500.jpg)
RICK GRIMES MEETS ANN COULTER!
Queen Elizabeth was visiting sick children in a Scottish hospital, and after performing her planned duties, she wandered off to other parts of the hospital. Walking into an unidentified ward, she went up to a patient in bed and asked him how he was doing. He replied:
"O, my luve is like a red, red rose,
That's newly sprung in June.
O, my luve is like the melodie,
That's sweetly played in tune....."
Finding the response somewhat inappropriate she wished him good day and moved down the ward to a room where another man was sitting quietly. In response to her inquiry, he began singing:
"Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to min' ?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days o' lang syne ?"
Somewhat baffled by this sequence of events she found a third room, where her greeting was met with:
"Wee, sleekit, cowrin', tim'rous beastie,
O, what a panic's in thy breastie ...."
She gave up, and left the ward. On her way out, she encountered the head nurse. "Is this the psychiatric ward?" she asked.
"No, your majesty," the nurse replied. "It's......the Burns unit."
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/photo-4.jpg)
William Shatner
William Shatner - Major Tom (Coming Home) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1moHWpLv-w#ws)
(http://ohmypictures.browntechnolimit.netdna-cdn.com/pictures/8f7d807e1f53eff5f9efbe5cb81090fb.jpg)
:)
(http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/5412/disneyonice500.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/195/disneyonice500.jpg/)
These are ALL Great! Thanks for the laughs, gang!
Quote from: Fester on February 07, 2013, 12:21:43 PM
(http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/5412/disneyonice500.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/195/disneyonice500.jpg/)
Oh my... As horrible as it is, it's terribly funny considering all those silly rumors flying about.
"Disney on Ice", reminds me of a long running show they had in the former "Soviet Union"; "Lenin on Ice". by the way, the version of the show where Lenin was joined by Stalin, was relatively short lived.
(http://img842.imageshack.us/img842/1079/fz39yaust7.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/842/fz39yaust7.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on February 09, 2013, 11:51:29 PM
(http://img842.imageshack.us/img842/1079/fz39yaust7.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/842/fz39yaust7.jpg/)
Nice!
(http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/413/bbs130206.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/713/bbs130206.jpg/)
;D ;D ;D
Sometimes the Vikings lost...
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8102/8464846120_0ec8e3b2cd_b.jpg)
(http://img835.imageshack.us/img835/517/ymcainchinese1280.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/835/ymcainchinese1280.jpg/)
:)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!%20-%20!%20astroids.jpg)
(http://img13.imageshack.us/img13/3029/c5rmkaust7.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/13/c5rmkaust7.jpg/)
If Animals Would Eat at McDonalds (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F99faLJYpo8#ws)
Cutethulhu (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SP-33XI4frs#noexternalembed)
Two little girls completely missing the point of Lovecraft.
Quote from: Fester on January 14, 2013, 05:06:11 PM
(http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/9682/of130114.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/853/of130114.gif/)
HA!! Now THAT'S funny!! ;D
I love this one!
(http://i530.photobucket.com/albums/dd344/bigbud3/001_zpse6945002.jpg)
CLASSIC!! ;D ;D
I cut this one out of the paper long ago cause it satisfies my sometimes different sense of humor....ha!
(http://i530.photobucket.com/albums/dd344/bigbud3/002_zpsb87d827d.jpg)
I'd like to see this movie . . .
(http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/779/kennydurkinmuppets2.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/5/kennydurkinmuppets2.jpg/)
Kenny Durkin on Deviant art
http://durkinworks.deviantart.com/ (http://durkinworks.deviantart.com/)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1261555960jpg_zps9a5f2e6f.jpg)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8239/8535538733_d8983a3326_b.jpg)
(http://img547.imageshack.us/img547/8958/sorrymybad500.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/547/sorrymybad500.png/)
I saw other sci fi related posts here...thus... 8)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/losttech_zps527d1633.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/ipsp_zpse385130f.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/Rik_zpsc2bddd42.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/trrock_zps101d2d1f.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/SPpar_zps203c9c06.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/TrandRik_zps1ffd3c75.jpg)
WTF is going on here?
(http://www.retronaut.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/768.jpg)
I dunno, but I like it!
Gillfan, that is one of a series of 1970s Japanese card set depictiung monsters attacking various places around the world. Most of the monsters are based on existing monsters from Godzilla or Ultraman and even Creech as shown here. Most of them are painted onto actual photos.
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1504459756jpg_zps77e2e2d9.png)
Quote from: RedKing on March 10, 2013, 04:15:31 PM
Gillfan, that is one of a series of 1970s Japanese card set depictiung monsters attacking various places around the world. Most of the monsters are based on existing monsters from Godzilla or Ultraman and even Creech as shown here. Most of them are painted onto actual photos.
Very cool. I never would have guessed trading cards. Couldn't figure out the Creech/ Holland connection.
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1715285454jpg_zpsdc5f64a3.jpg)
This would be so much cooler if they hadn't misspelled "happened." I mean, really? How do you not notice that?
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1612585703jpg_zps0abc6291.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on March 10, 2013, 07:47:05 PM
Very cool. I never would have guessed trading cards. Couldn't figure out the Creech/ Holland connection.
Maybe he used to hang out with dykes? ::)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on March 10, 2013, 11:10:23 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1715285454jpg_zpsdc5f64a3.jpg)
This would be so much cooler if they hadn't misspelled "happened." I mean, really? How do you not notice that?
You think THAT is bad...
http://now.msn.com/nyc-subway-typo-costs-250000-dollars-to-fix (http://now.msn.com/nyc-subway-typo-costs-250000-dollars-to-fix)
Sheesh.
Quote from: Fester on March 11, 2013, 01:07:58 AM
Maybe he used to hang out with dykes? ::)
Not everybody has a problem hanging with dykes. In fact there was a little Dutch boy who got famous for sticking his finger in a dyke.
Quote from: Haunted hearse on March 12, 2013, 06:52:05 PM
Not everybody has a problem hanging with dykes. In fact there was a little Dutch boy who got famous for sticking his finger in a dyke.
And she gave me such a slap . . .
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_122468086jpg_zps4121c811.jpg)
"Planet of the Cats"?
Well, I guess they are gonna be able to pull those tab tops open on the Fancy Feast cans! I will no longer be "special" to my cat :)
That and turning on the faucet, is pretty much all he needs me for. Hahahaha! Cool paws!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/notanywhere_zps62c0f22e.jpg)
8)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_58249jpg_zps71741e2b.jpg)
Walking Dead season finale spoiler...
(http://img585.imageshack.us/img585/8114/1363452872289.gif)
(http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/5609/empirestrikesback1500.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/138/empirestrikesback1500.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on March 12, 2013, 11:21:48 PM
And she gave me such a slap . . .
BA DUM TSSSSSSSHHHHHHH
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/483881_10151566002730530_516091907_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/480474_10151835000299988_1114861347_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on March 18, 2013, 10:31:33 PM
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/480474_10151835000299988_1114861347_n.jpg)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8112/8570071009_058454f08f_c.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_231242336jpg_zpsf6ad23f0.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/66675_553607981340266_1591727014_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on March 20, 2013, 09:26:36 PM
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/66675_553607981340266_1591727014_n.jpg)
Hey, that's a cool-looking Grave Walker. Who is he? What year was he produced/sold?
Sadly, I have no info on the grave walker.
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1833520087jpg_zps55546404.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on March 22, 2013, 07:23:30 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1833520087jpg_zps55546404.jpg)
'Nice find!
I JUST CAN'T TAKE YOU ANYWHERE!
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/anywhpart2_zps780cbbf4.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-568444590jpg_zps8d8ef873.jpg)
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/funny_26.jpg)
I think i might have hurt myself from laughing at this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=w-0CS-T1HUQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=w-0CS-T1HUQ)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/562616_10151855272979988_1177691232_n.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1178770968jpg_zps8f147882.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1424620205jpg_zps8b20ff79.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hefyell.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/Batbunnies.jpg)
(http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2011/109/f/e/easter_egg___animation_by_lr70-d3edzuh.gif)
Happy Easter. :)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/526846_507456029310901_1201439696_n.jpg)
Quote from: FACTO2 on March 30, 2013, 07:03:34 PM
Happy Easter. :)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/526846_507456029310901_1201439696_n.jpg)
8)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-406742058-1jpg_zps1e092ef9.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_222776184-1jpg_zps4e9c5007.jpg)
Happy Easter!
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8106/8602179049_f8444dddd6_c.jpg)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20AAA.jpg)
Creepy Easter Bunnies Gallery.
Some of these are just bizarrrrrrrrre:
http://now.msn.com/scary-easter-bunnies-a-photo-gallery (http://now.msn.com/scary-easter-bunnies-a-photo-gallery)
Love the Elvira pic. Hard to believe she's 61 and as hot as she ever was. Gotta love her "eggs." :)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/gz_zps96826379.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on March 31, 2013, 12:16:52 AM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_222776184-1jpg_zps4e9c5007.jpg)
GREAT FIND! I love seeing Elvira photos that I've never seen before! 8)
Quote from: The Batman on March 31, 2013, 02:13:51 PM
GREAT FIND! I love seeing Elvira photos that I've never seen before! 8)
I just love seeing Elvira photos! Zombie In Luv
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20526874_507998075923363_1459118688_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/579185_558734117491488_1408812236_n.jpg)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on March 31, 2013, 02:32:57 AM
Happy Easter!
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8106/8602179049_f8444dddd6_c.jpg)
Oh I like those!
8)
Here are the 10 first place winners in the International Pun Contest (date unknown):
1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The
stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per
passenger."
2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!
3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the
craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your
kayak and heat it too.
4. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other
says, "Are you sure?" The first replies "Yes, I'm positive."
5. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
His goal: transcend dental medication.
6. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in
the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour,
the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?",
they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts
boasting in an open foyer."
7. A woman delivers a set of identical twins and decides to give them up for
adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other
goes to a family in Spain ; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a
picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells
her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband
responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal
8. A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up
a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from
the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was
unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went
back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist
hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade"
the friars to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying
he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby
proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
9. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which
produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,
which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad
breath. This made him (Oh, this is so bad, it's good) a super calloused fragile
mystic hexed by halitosis.
10. And finally, there was the person who sent ten different puns to friends,
with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in
ten did.
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
I have to admit that these made me chuckle -- but don't hold that against me!!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-351380782jpg_zps634ae212.jpg)
BE GLAD YOU'RE NOT A DOG IN CHINA
My immediate reaction was to laugh. But then I stopped and just felt sorry for the dogs.
http://now.msn.com/animals-dressed-as-other-animals-photo-gallery (http://now.msn.com/animals-dressed-as-other-animals-photo-gallery)
This trend seems even weirder.
http://now.msn.com/dogs-wearing-pantyhose-a-photo-gallery (http://now.msn.com/dogs-wearing-pantyhose-a-photo-gallery)
For Walking Dead AND Doctor Who fans. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ez-GuGk89Ow (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ez-GuGk89Ow)
If this little "scientific" video about lost cities doesn't make you chuckle, you belong to the wrong forum:
http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=8&from=en-us_msnhp#/video/a0015bd8-d024-4d4b-868e-45c2e693944e (http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=8&from=en-us_msnhp#/video/a0015bd8-d024-4d4b-868e-45c2e693944e)
Is it just me?
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/justme_zps995d3c7c.jpg)
"My friend is hooked on drinking brake fluid. He says he can stop at any time."
"This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore."
"They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type O."
"I stayed up all night to see where the sunwnet. Then it dawned on me."
What did the fish say when he hit a cement wall? Damn!
A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
A Scottish man walked OUT of a bar. Yes, it REALLY DID happen. >:D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/joke.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-249234913-1jpg_zpsf55f0da7.jpg)
"Frankenstein vs. The Wolf Man," by Jonathan Zuchowski.
Count, you always come up with the best cartoons!! This one is a classic!
Kmart is offering free s-h-i-p-p-i-n-g.
Ship My Pants (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I03UmJbK0lA#ws)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on April 12, 2013, 10:26:07 AM
Kmart is offering free s-h-i-p-p-i-n-g.
Ship My Pants (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I03UmJbK0lA#ws)
For additional humor, turn on the closed captioning--the voice recognition is never 100% and often leads to unintended non-sequiturs.
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on April 12, 2013, 09:21:20 AMCount, you always come up with the best cartoons!! This one is a classic!
Actually, that's a painting by a friend of mine.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on April 12, 2013, 12:13:32 PM
Actually, that's a painting by a friend of mine.
I just noticed The Invisible Man in the front row -- this is really clever! Do you know if your friend has small (8x10 or smaller) prints for sale?
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on April 12, 2013, 12:20:35 PMI just noticed The Invisible Man in the front row -- this is really clever! Do you know if your friend has small (8x10 or smaller) prints for sale?
He sells prints, but I don't know the size. Prints are available from his Facebook page.
https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Fantasy-Art-of-Jonathan-The-ANIMAL-Zuchowski/120289351347144?id=120289351347144&_rdr (https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Fantasy-Art-of-Jonathan-The-ANIMAL-Zuchowski/120289351347144?id=120289351347144&_rdr)
Love the fact your friend put Abbott and Costello in the painting as well. Front row opposite side.
Quote from: CreepysFan on April 12, 2013, 04:28:31 PMLove the fact your friend put Abbott and Costello in the painting as well. Front row opposite side.
Check around the audience for more surprises. Jon actually consulted me as to who he should stick in there, and if I thought it would be okay to have Laughton's Hunchback as the referee, instead of Chaney.
Meanwhile, here's a bit of monster humor from legendary funnyman Chuck McCann!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1583411130-1jpg_zpsb071cf55.jpg)
Sadly, this really is going to be the next Captain America costume...
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20!%20-%20awtf.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/smrf_zpse01d1bc5.jpg)
Thus began Gargamel's obsession!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1733633899-1jpg_zpse21166fa.jpg)
Little Rose doesn't need any help putting on her seatbelt dammit!!.In case you don't catch what she's telling her dad, she's saying 'Worry about yourself!" I almost peed myself watching this!
Worry about yourself! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4A6Bu96ALOw#ws)
Quote from: Scatter on April 20, 2013, 08:33:51 AMLittle Rose doesn't need any help putting on her seatbelt dammit!!.In case you don't catch what she's telling her dad, she's saying 'Worry about yourself!" I almost peed myself watching this!
Worry about yourself! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4A6Bu96ALOw#ws)
This is why cars have trunks, you realize. :angel:
Is it just me?
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/subliminal1.jpg)
pool party
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/subliminal3.jpg)
burrito
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/b3.jpg)
Hi Dad! We painted the TV white while the babysitter was sleeping!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/kidspainting.jpg)
That wasn't chicken........meow....
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/chicken.jpg)
Look who I found in our garden.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/happywombat.jpg)
What do you mean?
(http://www.viceland.com/int/dos_donts/1261/main.jpg?44)
Is that Eddie Murphy?
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-2144195702jpg_zpsd494074e.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/bur3_zps0afd0ec5.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1236962371jpg_zpsf69e1a07.jpg)
Dragon Baby (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oHWvFrpocY#ws)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/536244_428253477265308_954538663_n.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1824911405jpg_zps90898f8c.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/476896_10151905689544988_1139330058_o.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-492161101jpg_zps9213ab6b.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1352217685jpg_zps1eb45750.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-2050818921jpg_zpsef57423b.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on April 25, 2013, 11:24:32 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-492161101jpg_zps9213ab6b.jpg)
I'm using this.
If the tubes are hung on strings, they will move around a little in a gentle breeze.
This toy is real! It's not a fake or a PhotoShop prank.
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_228746893jpg_zpsb1c6be79.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-2108753316jpg_zpsf1f093cf.jpg)
'Nice find, Count Z.
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/pza_zps18ca885e.jpg)
MARGE! You forgot to order DIET Coke!
(http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3336/3497303316_5333892e51_o.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/mtl.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/603834_10151884496851124_272274161_n.jpg)
Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmanns mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico . But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York . The ship hit an iceberg and sank.
The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning.
The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as - Sinko De Mayo.
I found this on another site for work I belong to.
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/weekendclassic_zps94e064fb.jpg)
And here I thought Sinko de Maya was about the use of indoor plumbing in Mezo-america, rather than being about the Titanic.
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/ntbt_zps6d34c08e.jpg)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_cMdbfkl3Rz4/SRFEK2G-uvI/AAAAAAAAECs/3NMh9x4Wo3I/s800/heineken2.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cover.jpg)
(http://s5.favim.com/orig/51/08-2011-funny-monster-wallpaper-Favim.com-486026.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/600824_515906991790324_1965771284_n.jpg)
Mike - you are incorrigible!!
That's why I love ya! ;D
(http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/89500/Richard-Simmons-with-Frankenstein-89817.jpg)
HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_SCW8h9Kyks/T3xelayQmaI/AAAAAAAAMWk/rA4UjicXjDE/s1600/aliens+ET.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/179587_570218349689378_13086144_n.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/Roarrr.jpg)
(http://www.sanitaryum.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/i-love-satan.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hisbadcostume.jpg)
Don't worry, it's not me. I'm the '89 Batman, baby.
Quote from: The Batman on May 11, 2013, 01:55:59 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hisbadcostume.jpg)
Don't worry, it's not me. I'm the '89 Batman, baby.
Yeah, he's the 389 Batman............at LEAST.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/remindsmeofrenfaire.jpg)
'Using Vader powers.....RISE, good citizens! >:D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/rise-1_zps98a627b6.jpg)
(http://funnypicturesplus.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/darth-vader-batman.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/beargolf.jpg)
(http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01717/An-alligator--main_1717664a.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on May 11, 2013, 07:04:07 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/beargolf.jpg)
Bears don't like clown clothes.
So in running from the bear they discovered the gator? This club really takes their hazards seriously.
(http://media.parentsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/mask_kid_awkward_family_photos.jpg)
(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51d6zrKEwML._SX300_.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/caption.jpg)
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/funny-batman-pictures-2.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/horr1.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/Bathall.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/apeattack.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bu.jpg)
(http://www.nedhardy.com/wp-content/uploads/images/2012/november/lol_animals/funny_animal_pictures_7.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on May 11, 2013, 08:01:53 PM
(http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01717/An-alligator--main_1717664a.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on May 11, 2013, 07:04:07 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/beargolf.jpg)
Couldn't they just put in a sand trap?
'Crunchy & good with ketchup!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bugs.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/withf_zpscc3866fa.jpg)
...and, a much FINER picture with Flash! 8) :o :) C:) >:D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/fla3.jpg)
(http://www.mydisguises.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/funny_wonder-woman.jpg)(http://www.youdressweird.com/image/dressfunny/1112/-dress-funny-1323819340.jpg)
bus thing
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/busthing.jpg)
(http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/756061_700b.jpg)
Nope, can't quite do that with my beard...yet.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on May 14, 2013, 11:23:02 PM
Nope, can't quite do that with my beard...yet.
yes = could imply - coming soon
:)
It's about 2" too short, at this time. Debating on getting it chopped for the summer.
If you remember this, you're old!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-17960184-1-1jpg_zpsdb4295ab.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on May 15, 2013, 07:00:55 PM
If you remember this, you're old!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-17960184-1-1jpg_zpsdb4295ab.jpg)
The energy crisis in the 1970's muct have been real bad, if instead of motorcycles, they had California Highway Patrol officers (CHiPS) on roller skates instead. :P
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lybaatvnco1r9rcymo1_500.gif)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/SatB.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/i.jpg)
8)
YOU GUYS ARE KILLIN' ME, BUT...
(http://i363.photobucket.com/albums/oo79/TheUnknownPrimate/squatchya_zps8c105369.jpg) (http://s363.photobucket.com/user/TheUnknownPrimate/media/squatchya_zps8c105369.jpg.html)
LOL!!! Nice one Mark!
'Just a photoshop I was working on:
Perhaps some of you will know WHICH movie that monster mask is from! ;D
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/capn3.jpg)
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0812/ballet-classes-ballet-classes-captain-kirk-star-trek-demotivational-poster-1230750065.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-341646230jpg_zpsaad5236f.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on May 18, 2013, 08:19:55 PM
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0812/ballet-classes-ballet-classes-captain-kirk-star-trek-demotivational-poster-1230750065.jpg)
Oh, that poor, innocent Tribble!
(http://allyourtrekarebelongto.us/tribbles.jpg)
Those aren't Tribbles! They're M'Ress' hairballs!
(http://mimg.ugo.com/200812/15500/mress.jpg)
(http://imgc.allpostersimages.com/images/P-473-488-90/65/6591/TTV2100Z/posters/harry-bliss-bates-motel-birdhouse-new-yorker-cartoon.jpg)
If someone makes a Bates Motel birdhouse (shouldn't that be the "Birds Motel"?), I want one.
I wouldn't put it on a pole like that. It would get stolen in a couple of days.
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on May 18, 2013, 08:19:55 PM
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0812/ballet-classes-ballet-classes-captain-kirk-star-trek-demotivational-poster-1230750065.jpg)
Oh my!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/ouch2.jpg)
"Send more cookies right now!"
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cookie2.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on May 19, 2013, 11:53:57 AM
(http://imgc.allpostersimages.com/images/P-473-488-90/65/6591/TTV2100Z/posters/harry-bliss-bates-motel-birdhouse-new-yorker-cartoon.jpg)
I couldn't locate it, but there is a great Larson "Far Side" cartton involving the "Bait Motel" and a family of worms.
(http://cdn.themonolith.com/wp-content/uploads/Episode-VII-Jokes.png)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on May 19, 2013, 03:05:15 PM
(http://cdn.themonolith.com/wp-content/uploads/Episode-VII-Jokes.png)
NICE ! 8)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7059416576/hA3BB398C/)
Went into the local JC Penny to pick up some portraits we had done of Justine. While we were waiting, I noticed the display pics they set up to sell you on having pics taken. I thought this baby had a strong resemblance to a certain German lunatic. One well placed swipe of a black Sharpie later, and we have.......
HITLER BABY!!
(http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3783/8818089924_679e6acf78_c.jpg)
(http://allcomedypics.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/totally_looks_like_07.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/aby4_zpse4f09dd1.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/wall33_zps0dbb6e86.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/blw2_zps518319f5.jpg)
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_zKBbtj9rWrU/Six7amM_B5I/AAAAAAAACOs/WP1RZ9bQgj4/s400/in-out-sticker.gif)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hagr_zps7f79f82f.jpg)
The Heart Attack Grill in AZ. Meals served by nurses and doctors...
8)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdgndtV2Te1rin469o1_400.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/goo_zpse2ee483a.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/gn5_zpsf8aee39a.jpg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lteefkd9A51qzxzwwo1_500.jpg)
'Nice find McDougal!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/catz33_zps19edac26.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/mach55_zpsdac992df.jpg)
try to FIND THE HIDDEN baby king kong:
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/kng34_zpsa5eeebd0.jpg)
(http://images.wikia.com/adventuretimewithfinnandjake/images/0/02/Funny-gif-King-Kong-vs-Godzilla.gif)
Only the Doctor Who fans will get it. :)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/944259_503444509710245_254851187_n.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/disco.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6632847360/hA87B19A3/)
Col. Spidey
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/KFCsp.jpg)
(http://funny-pictures-blog.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/funny-image-2011-07.jpg)
A farmer named Sam was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture of New Hampshire when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"
Sam looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3® cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany ...
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL®
database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Sam.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Sam says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You work for the Federal government" says Sam.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered Sam. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep."
"Now give me back my dog."
;D
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AZU1gM-n938/ToE78e5UclI/AAAAAAAAASA/LF9ZcC4-XbA/s1600/Last+Supper+BLOG.jpg)
And we wonder how America became the fattest country on Earth, and how we stay that way? (http://pix11.com/2013/05/31/hands-free-whopper-holder-from-burger-king-is-an-actual-thing/#ixzz2UtmH22Kh)
(http://tribwpix.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/screen-shot-2013-05-31-at-2-48-35-pm.png)
(http://jpegy.com/images/uploads/2013/05/AvP.jpg)
(http://jpegy.com/images/uploads/2013/05/Daryl-Dixon-Cake.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on May 31, 2013, 10:37:30 PM
(http://jpegy.com/images/uploads/2013/05/AvP.jpg)
Well, at least their kids get along together.
(http://jpegy.com/images/uploads/2013/05/Probably-one-of-the-creepiest-things-Ill-ever-see-in-Target.jpg)
Family Guy Alien (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oWDejlVCOw#)
LET'S ROCK !
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/skd_zps787c099f.jpg)
>:D
(http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/1201/confidence-confidence-predator-funny-overconfidence-demotivational-posters-1327386415.jpg)
The creature FINALLY found a woman that will not run away from him!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/crea22_zps77bff191.jpg)
(http://i1283.photobucket.com/albums/a548/McDougalsHouseofHorrors/Pumpkinsandalcohol_zpsf1c3cb47.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on May 30, 2013, 02:57:20 PM
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AZU1gM-n938/ToE78e5UclI/AAAAAAAAASA/LF9ZcC4-XbA/s1600/Last+Supper+BLOG.jpg)
Guess who has a new desktop? I'll give you a hint, it's me!
(http://3-akamai.tapcdn.com/images/thumbs/taps/2013/06/geektastic-75648a4a-sz480x462-animate.jpg)
Leonard Nimoy's version of "Proud Mary".
Leonard Nimoy: Proud Mary (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFUaHWAJ9_4#ws)
(http://www.pics22.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/how-spock-got-his-pointy-ears.jpg)
(http://208.116.9.205/10/content/30697/1.gif)
(http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b319/TaraZar/damn-cat.gif)
Quote from: The Batman on June 03, 2013, 12:06:58 PM
(http://208.116.9.205/10/content/30697/1.gif)
(http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b319/TaraZar/damn-cat.gif)
"Yo chubs, stop that work out nonsense and feed me!"
(http://imageshack.us/scaled/thumb/542/25332045268535815841156j.jpg)
Does anyone know why I can't get image shack to make pictures bigger? I change the size but only gives thumb nail sizes.
Quote from: The Batman on June 03, 2013, 12:06:58 PM
(http://208.116.9.205/10/content/30697/1.gif)
(http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b319/TaraZar/damn-cat.gif)
(http://www.guzer.com/pictures/boobs_sit_up.jpg)
(http://edge.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/1044414/81608564.gif)
(http://chzgifs.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/funny-gifs-epic-dive.gif)
[
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/p480x480/482264_10151472844392236_1808123645_n.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/WWSup_zps7b727dff.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/hojwgoK.gif)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/426669_614050411938866_69008449_n.jpg)
(https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/969220_10151994196739988_707392564_n.jpg)
(http://www.allmystery.de/dateien/uh43048,1250289585,celebrity-pictures-william-shatner-perfect-gift1.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on June 05, 2013, 05:56:26 PM
(http://www.allmystery.de/dateien/uh43048,1250289585,celebrity-pictures-william-shatner-perfect-gift1.jpg)
Oh my!
(http://cdn.motinetwork.net/motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/1005/oh-my-sulu-is-fabulous-demotivational-poster-1275268177.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-916476265jpg_zpsc40307a8.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
(https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-wsfCNhTxYyE/UBgan374eNI/AAAAAAAAEZU/83UGok16XJI/w506-h404-o/cinderella.jpg)
What poor, second-tier '80s slasher gets Mulan, I wonder?
Oh, wait, I know...Christine! The whole Asian drivers thing...
Lord, I apologize...
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
Quote from: Count_Zirock on June 08, 2013, 11:12:28 AM
What poor, second-tier '80s slasher gets Mulan, I wonder?
Oh, wait, I know...Christine! The whole Asian drivers thing...
Lord, I apologize...
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
I see Freddy and Sleeping Beauty, as well as Snow White and Jason. I don't see Mulan. Which post had the picture of Mulan?
Quote from: Count_Zirock on June 08, 2013, 11:12:28 AM
What poor, second-tier '80s slasher gets Mulan, I wonder?
Since you ask Count, it's Kill Bill of course!! (http://d1xcqlxj49e9dd.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/Loaiza_LG_Mulan-Kill-Bill.jpg?bdeedc)
Not even Bambi is safe...
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mcmc7pyGTI1rdq2opo1_500.jpg)
Quote from: Haunted hearse on June 08, 2013, 11:47:27 AMI don't see Mulan. Which post had the picture of Mulan?
None. I was just postulating. It happens every 28 days.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bande_zps5dfaecca.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bigelv_zps37f81b98.jpg)
(http://img0.etsystatic.com/000/0/5969919/il_fullxfull.164079156.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on June 08, 2013, 04:48:43 PM
(http://img0.etsystatic.com/000/0/5969919/il_fullxfull.164079156.jpg)
Man, is that some kind of unusual find! Creature Elvis! 'Just add shades, baby! 8) 8) 8)
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uiSfbwjsxAY/T-zdWkx0bII/AAAAAAAAC9E/JwgkpdBcpFk/s1600/Walmart+Elvis.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/pdon_zps4cdf897b.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6738727680/h374D7218/)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-423734824jpg_zpsea36b3b1.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_PhjIMfraFSs/SLlBiiDs1GI/AAAAAAAAAEA/DBj3yHVFgek/s400/cat+monster.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/179759_582167745182635_171154300_n.jpg)
(http://assets.amuniversal.com/149bb8509e2a0130cdc7001dd8b71c47?width=900.0)
(http://i482.photobucket.com/albums/rr183/LewyTanner/telos_shot.jpg)
Happy Father's Day...
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/p480x480/971232_684966568196171_880688296_n.jpg)
(http://funnyshare.org/s/11/46111-Funny-Zombie-face.jpg)
(http://0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/37/15/9a82899eb1b5db1aaf1c07e4eeb20962.jpg)
(http://i.qkme.me/3rinqc.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-442538023jpg_zpsbb5c7fd1.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
No, it's not me!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1381549760jpg_zps2e35da70.png)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 2
(http://www.needstolaugh.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/batman-fan-girl-batman-funny-pictures-1294970579.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/8541_321940697939386_852020533_n.jpg)
(http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQxSvb3Po6ZR0OpXCZLYvlK4wzNGv5hWbVlOuPNx88z9pJVoMwe)
(http://atoast2toast.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/trading_places_monkey.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/1016498_10152027539434988_1455114600_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on June 18, 2013, 07:54:18 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/1016498_10152027539434988_1455114600_n.jpg)
I like this one!!! :D
It's a t-shirt -- here's the link: http://www.fright-rags.com/kill-destroyers-p-792.html (http://www.fright-rags.com/kill-destroyers-p-792.html)
Quote from: Gillfan on June 18, 2013, 07:54:18 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/1016498_10152027539434988_1455114600_n.jpg)
It's a t-shirt -- here's the link: http://www.fright-rags.com/kill-destroyers-p-792.html (http://www.fright-rags.com/kill-destroyers-p-792.html)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/3056080128/hFFDAA689/)
(http://moonbattery.com/Pelosi_Mars-Attacks.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1514355844jpg_zpsd58840ce.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://media.heavy.com/media/2013/05/tumblr_mmqontogkG1spqqr0o1_500.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/295346_362926513809617_1042863397_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on June 18, 2013, 07:54:18 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/1016498_10152027539434988_1455114600_n.jpg)
Cover your crotch, Freddy! Chucky's going for the goods!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7a5cbeZTL1r9mwe3o1_500.jpg)
Some tragedies explained:
(http://imageshack.us/a/img692/8061/0d5j.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img692/61/y2s2.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on June 23, 2013, 01:53:50 PM
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7a5cbeZTL1r9mwe3o1_500.jpg)
NICE FIND ! 8)
The red lagoon creature speaks...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/ent4_zpsdb32991f.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/ent555_zps52a34696.jpg)
Baby, I can't wait until we're done filming for the day. :laugh:
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/dve_zps4c6f0821.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/dve2_zpseb9f4c57.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img703/3038/fyew.jpg)
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0805/vacation-insurance-godzilla-disneyland-demotivational-poster-1212193412.jpg)
(http://thebayareabrit.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/chrislee.jpg)
(http://www.fright-rags.com/images/prod_carrie_aid.jpg)
http://www.fright-rags.com/carrie-aid-p-836.html (http://www.fright-rags.com/carrie-aid-p-836.html)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdrfwhbwSe1rs0tiko1_500.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on June 27, 2013, 05:36:49 PM
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdrfwhbwSe1rs0tiko1_500.jpg)
I thought Leatherface from TCM was from Muerto County, Texas.
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/1167606528/h69277C7A/)
(http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/9541/3lsn.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/6/3lsn.jpg/)
(http://www.triggabytes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/fireworks-2-003.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/WRP_zps8535841b.jpg)
from my personal collection... 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/shpj_zpsf8580fe9.jpg)
(http://shirt.signalfirestudios.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Madness72dpi.png)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Kevin James
http://www.youtube.com/embed/Ai4tPe80S6Q?rel=0 (http://www.youtube.com/embed/Ai4tPe80S6Q?rel=0)
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RswhrQTzL6g/UAK2RUaspYI/AAAAAAAAA9s/N15PESsUj0Y/s1600/Frankenstein_Meets_Shirley_Temple_horror_monster_movie_poster_by_Gillfan_Lionel_Atwill_Bela_Lugosi_John_Barrymore_Ilona_Massey_Glenn_Strange_Bill_Bojangles_Robinson_Curt_Siodmak_Robert_Siodmak_Jean_Yarbrough.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/970062_10200794289192278_1081019124_n.jpg)
Another way to send THE Batsignal... 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/btsg_zpsea3a6b9a.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/Bela-Lugosi-critical-analysis-of-twilight-10806668-450-548_zpsdc2e3c56.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on June 18, 2013, 01:25:27 AM
(http://www.needstolaugh.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/batman-fan-girl-batman-funny-pictures-1294970579.jpg)
This seems familiar...
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
The Dunwich Horror: The Next Generation!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/tumblr_mp8ddvk2761rkoo0to1_1280_zps3363bfc6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://cdn1.images.videobash.com/photos/000/034/713/34713.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1823945992jpg_zps03f850f6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://www.headinjurytheater.com/images/comic%20lovecraft%20scrabble%20jared%20hindman.jpg)
Get your motor runnin'
Head out on the highway
'Lookin' for adventure
and whatever comes our way
Yeah Darlin' go make it happen
take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your guns at once
and explode into space
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cregui_zps5ea4ea6f.jpg)
I like smoke and lightning
Heavy metal thunder
Racin' with the wind
and the feelin' that I'm under
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/crea76_zpsc569eb78.jpg)
Nice lamp!!
(http://i.imgur.com/AMDNG.jpg)
(http://themetapicture.com/media/funny-zombie-deer-hunters.jpg)
(http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/8150/xtex.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/19/xtex.jpg/)
(http://www.sarahgonewild.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/darth-vader-funny.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1734731951jpg_zpsb05a499b.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://img854.imageshack.us/img854/4749/mzqr.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/854/mzqr.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
(http://img24.imageshack.us/img24/9629/2y19.jpg)
(http://picturesofwins.com/files/2009/12/win_marco12_10.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1432281066jpg_zps75a3ebb3.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Quote from: Fester on July 02, 2013, 10:59:06 PM
(http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/8150/xtex.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/19/xtex.jpg/)
;D
(http://www.blogcdn.com/www.urlesque.com/media/2011/02/hipsterqueen.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/btprk_zpsdd94136d.jpg)
(http://fateawaits.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/batman5.jpg)
(http://img856.imageshack.us/img856/8223/ns1r.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/856/ns1r.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc1/1004463_330638507069605_267812596_n.jpg)
World's shortest vacation
World's shortest vacation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGN2M6H0C80#)
Quote from: Gillfan on July 08, 2013, 05:22:52 AM
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc1/1004463_330638507069605_267812596_n.jpg)
:o
(http://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/2011/1/6/497bbf45-ef00-4d38-83f5-f3d3e306fce1.jpg)
"Next time, you'll buy the friggin' cookies!"
(http://www.peacheschrist.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/1225314046683-300x224.jpg)
I forget what this spot was produced for, but it made me laugh:
FUNNIEST COMMERCIAL EVER! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtjW78IUgOQ#)
Funniest Thing Ever - Hilarious (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZCoIege8oM#)
Mrs. Miller- Strangers in the Night (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uV0MtVWIN8Y#)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 08, 2013, 03:23:48 PM
(http://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/2011/1/6/497bbf45-ef00-4d38-83f5-f3d3e306fce1.jpg)
(http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/5624/f0mo.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/4/f0mo.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
(http://www.funnycorner.net/funny-pictures/3320/King%20kong%20was%20needed%20in%20NY.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/969729_460221787407380_352634672_n.jpg)
(http://openbooksociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/vampire-baby.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/530295_10152080899729988_349794794_n.png)
(http://favim.com/orig/201107/12/baby-book-exorcist-funny-lol-Favim.com-103416.jpg)
Now, there is convenience.
(http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/630/knjq.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/27/knjq.jpg/)
From the L.A. County Coroner's gift shop, "Skeletons in a Closet"!!
(http://seattletimes.com/ABPub/2010/11/24/2013516834.jpg)(http://seattletimes.com/ABPub/2010/11/24/2013517472.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/36312_616766038354547_694051828_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on July 12, 2013, 09:55:30 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/36312_616766038354547_694051828_n.jpg)
GREAT! "chi chi, haaahh haaahh" < sound effect >
8)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_132716796jpg_zps25d7e0a8.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Quote from: Count_Zirock on July 12, 2013, 10:16:18 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_132716796jpg_zps25d7e0a8.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
HAAAA!!! ;D 8)
The thing is to make sure you kick your lips and say it in Heath Ledger's voice. ;)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1496594815jpg_zpsb4264f53.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://www.horror-asylum.com/news/pics/sexy-zombies---you-still-would.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_363816723jpg_zps05932fa3.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1238514435jpg_zpsd0f57b56.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20101105221610/monster/images/2/2d/Monster_under_bed.jpg)
8)
(http://slaymyboredom.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/child-therapy.jpeg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/prty_zps1dd7dde1.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/undr_zps117c4e4c.jpg)
(https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/p480x480/600368_171532156323013_1171079552_n.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/chf_zpscfc6eebd.jpg)
(http://weknowawesome.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/funny-food-photos-chewbacca-noodles.jpg)
(http://www.halfmanhalfmovie.com/Resources/drchristianszell.jpeg)
(http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/4661/dr48.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/689/dr48.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
Leonard Nimoy - The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins [FULL VERSION] - best quality (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGF5ROpjRAU#)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/4671193088/hBD3017BA/)
William Shatner "Sings" 'Rocket Man' (1978) - BEST QUALITY! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lul-Y8vSr0I#)
Mrs Miller - Monday Monday The one and only mrs miller (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zKCQK0apKc#)
(http://img832.imageshack.us/img832/5108/ubz6.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/832/ubz6.png/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
Why is it when I hear Mrs. Miller warbling, I'm automatically picturing Aunt Harriet from Batman?
Warbler? Remember Tiny Tim?
Tiny Tim - Tip-Toe Through The Tulips (Laugh-In 1968) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFyPtCOEq8Y#)
But Tiny Tim's act was never meant to be anything but a silly novelty.
Nimoy and The Shat really thought they were serious performers.
Not sure about Mrs Miller--she always sounded like she backed into the barbecue. ::)
Some real singers got well out of their depths.
Andy Griffith-The House of the rising Sun (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_2gdg17rtw#)
Bing Crosby - Hey Jude (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D8LpaQekmY#)
Still not sure why this one happened--except it happened in Paint Your Wagon.
Clint Eastwood. "I Talk To the Trees" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nn8YubD01sk#ws)
(Even Lee Marvin "sang" in that one . . . :P)
Lee Marvin - Wandering Star (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnbiRDNaDeo#)
Fester, I think I'm now hearing impaired -- hopefully.
(http://fbgags.com/wp-content/uploads/titanic-pose-funny-bird-hit.jpg)
I understand that Lee Marvin "singing" "I was Born Under A Wandering Star" (From Paint Your Wagon"), became a novelty hit in England.
Quote from: Haunted hearse on July 15, 2013, 11:30:18 PM
I understand that Lee Marvin "singing" "I was Born Under A Wandering Star" (From Paint Your Wagon"), became a novelty hit in England.
Back in 1970. For three weeks, Wanderin' Star was number one on the Irish and UK pop charts. At the same time, the Beatles'
Let it Be was number two. 8)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 15, 2013, 08:11:30 PM
Warbler? Remember Tiny Tim?
Tiny Tim - Tip-Toe Through The Tulips (Laugh-In 1968) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFyPtCOEq8Y#)
That's Tim Burton! ;D
[Leonard Nimoy] Billy Don't Play The Banjo Anymore (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unuOpQ4yUTc#ws)
When rabbits attack...
Night Of The Lepus (Preview Clip) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAgGBla4ZRg#ws)
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/funny-titanic.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on July 15, 2013, 08:46:46 PM
Bing Crosby - Hey Jude (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D8LpaQekmY#)
At last, a song by Crosby I don't like. I think his "Pum pum pums" toward the conclusion really add to the listening experience.
Just today I opened a fortune cookie, with a simple message on it. "You are not illiterate." I was so relieved when I read that.
JACK DAVIS + DRACULA = AWESOME
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-513440031jpg_zps1c7b404c.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Another Jack Davis Dracula classic (I used to have one of these LPs). But my Davis favorite is the "You'll Die Laughing" card set, the first monster card set.
(http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT4VtOo4eifM_LSlnW63qmVHzrYYmdPFSeUnetBiQ-zioVfVFsPHw)(http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6208/6106092721_aba4227168_o.jpg)
(http://dixonverse.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/davis-cards-31-1024x384.jpg)
The worst cover of a Beatles song ever! (Let It Be) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvPugOWeZiA#)
Quote from: LP_Quagmire on July 16, 2013, 10:25:40 PM
The worst cover of a Beatles song ever! (Let It Be)[/url]
Wow! That is incredible!
Here is one of my favorites from a Woman of Enormous Talents--Mae West!!
Golden Throats - Mae West (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4Eol9g_TT4#)
Captain and Tennille Muskrat Love (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgCk3bnvO5Y#)
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bblLcGuBS9U/T4laZG-Y_NI/AAAAAAAABbk/3SkPWMLHry8/s1600/17.jpg)
(http://img42.imageshack.us/img42/284/xffo.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/42/xffo.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
(http://img827.imageshack.us/img827/8650/xyl0.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/827/xyl0.jpg/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
(http://stevestenzel.com/photos3/ff_viagra_mot_poster.jpg)
The difference between complete and finished. When you find the right woman you are complete. When you find the wrong woman you are finished. When the right woman catches you with the wrong one you are completely finished.
Quote from: Illoman on July 17, 2013, 09:51:13 PM
The difference between complete and finished. When you find the right woman you are complete. When you find the wrong woman you are finished. When the right woman catches you with the wrong one you are completely finished.
Completely finished(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vj3_4Cdyx8s/Tc9A6tWMtCI/AAAAAAAABNQ/CAq0Cct9aqc/s1600/catch+cheating+husband.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cre3_zps8bd9a38e.jpg)
8)
Quote from: The Batman on July 17, 2013, 10:36:53 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cre3_zps8bd9a38e.jpg)
8)
NICE!!
(http://trollkhmer.files.wordpress.com/2012/11/titanic-3d-funny.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-858761668jpg_zps696ce6f4.jpg)
These blasted ads are going to have me eating Slim-Jims again, I just know it!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
Hard to believe the man who wrote "Eleanor Rigby" is also responsible for this:
DANCE PARTY no.003 Temporary Secretary by Paul McCartney (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JPAgG1gbD8#)
Funny Prank!! Monster in the toilet! The Kid screams so lou (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VkOOh9UQ_1I#)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hhd_zps8d99e2cb.jpg)
hot head >:D
(http://www.strangekidsclub.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/R.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on July 20, 2013, 12:58:34 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hhd_zps8d99e2cb.jpg)
hot head >:D
You know there was a drop or two of alcohol that lead to that decision.
(http://rescuehumor.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Funny_Fire_1.jpeg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/kth_zpscd2fa405.jpg)
(http://renesantacruz.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/space_fart.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img4/1076/49qh.jpg)
(http://www.arwrath.com/content/7/78492.gif)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/not-now-ladies-50s-sci-fi-amazing-colossal-man-demotivational-poster-1261959244_zps58fb6021.jpg)
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/NoCarbs-EDM_75per_zpsccea85c1.png)
"Don't make fun of me or I'll stab
you with my giant heroin syringe!!"
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_s_30zQFJp4g/SY90wyCveLI/AAAAAAAAOy8/PS1rQHIDgeI/s400/AmazingColMan+(66).jpg)
(http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/webdr06/2013/7/22/14/enhanced-buzz-26193-1374519351-1.jpg)
Quote from: RedKing on July 22, 2013, 08:30:05 PM
(http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f24/RedKing71/not-now-ladies-50s-sci-fi-amazing-colossal-man-demotivational-poster-1261959244_zps58fb6021.jpg)
Oh c'mon -- the ladies are just trying to get a photo of the Amazing Colossal schwanzstucker!
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/64411_10152114035144988_788456873_n.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/4187085312/h1B5F544D/)
SEE his underwear grow at the same rate he grows!
FEEL his mighty thunderfarts RUMBLE through the theater!
(http://i2.listal.com/image/505172/600full-the-amazing-colossal-man-poster.jpg)
"Oh man, I just stepped in dog crap!"
(http://spaceart.de/produkte/gigant_des_grauens_colossal_man_diorama_wcb001-b.jpg)
Four guys were all at a deer camp. They had two cabins, two men per cabin.
After the first night, no one wanted to room with Bob because he snored so badly.
They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.
The first night, Joe slept with Bob and came dragging to breakfast.The next morning with his hair a
Mess and his eyes all bloodshot. They said, "Man, what happened to you?" He said, "Bob snored so
Loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night."
The next night it was Mike's turn. In the morning, same thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot.
They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!" He said, "That Bob shakes the roof
With his snoring. I watched him all night."
Then it was Fred's turn. Fred was a tanned older cowboy, a man's man. The next morning he came
To breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "Good morning! " he said. They couldn't believe it.
They said, "Man, what happened? How did you survive the snoring?" He said, "Well, we got ready for bed.
I patted Bob on the butt, tucked him into bed, and kissed him good night. Bob sat up and watched me all night."
With age comes wisdom!
A guy walked into a pharmacy and purchased a package of condoms.
The cashier asked him if he wants a bag.
The guy said "She's not that ugly"...
< boom, boom, symbol crash >
Quote from: The Batman on July 23, 2013, 10:34:42 PM
A guy walked into a pharmacy and purchased a package of condoms.
The cashier asked him if he wants a bag.
The guy said "She's not that ugly"...
< boom, boom, symbol crash >
(http://blog.jrcigars.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Picture-201.png)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/mikhtrs_zps12fde554.jpg)
(http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t38/didisuryawan/Michael_Myers_Is_Horny_by_liquid_ve.gif)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 24, 2013, 08:17:39 PM
(http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t38/didisuryawan/Michael_Myers_Is_Horny_by_liquid_ve.gif)
"C'mon baby, do the locomotion with me, now.
You gotta swing your hips, now."
Yeah, swing this, Batman
(http://i925.photobucket.com/albums/ad93/theshape1188/Photo1394.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/mmjam_zpsde56efa5.jpg)
ROCKIN' OUT! 8) >:D C:)
(http://img5.joyreactor.com/pics/post/funny-pictures-auto-halloween-movie-466775.jpeg)
Well, at least this time around, no shotgun is needed. Just a .22 will be plenty. >:D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/zgn_zpsbaf27676.jpg)
zombie gnomes and gnomebies...Why I didn't I think of that first...Damn & blast!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/zgn5_zpsd39cb2cf.jpg)
(http://hobbostag.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/evil_gnome.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 27, 2013, 01:26:57 PM
(http://hobbostag.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/evil_gnome.jpg)
Nice find!
ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE
A pharmacist walks into his shop to find a man leaning rigidly against the wall. "What's wrong with him?", he asks his assistant.
"He came in for cough syrup but i couldn't find any so I gave him an entire bottle of laxatives instead"
"You idiot", said the pharmacist. "You can't treat a cough with laxatives!!!"
"Of course you can" said the assistant. "Look at him." "He doesn't dare cough, now!"
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6682231296/h754C9F9E/)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img543/3587/qv52.jpg)
Wolfman Spotted In Miami
(http://cl.jroo.me/z3/W/H/S/b/a.aaa.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/dnk_zps76150f65.jpg)
(http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/3510/1hzy.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/543/1hzy.jpg/)
(http://funny-pics-fun.com/wp-content/uploads/Funny-Zombie-Run-For-Your-Life-6.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/brs_zps63641ba9.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/gnzgr_zps73cf93e6.jpg)
(http://b.vimeocdn.com/ts/137/345/137345982_640.jpg)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/548889_468582526571306_1873454655_n.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/4201899776/h2A661C3C/)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 28, 2013, 09:49:20 PM
(http://b.vimeocdn.com/ts/137/345/137345982_640.jpg)
This is the next Syfy original movie!
(https://sphotos-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/970021_340092086124247_1039197490_n.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on July 29, 2013, 10:48:20 PM
(https://sphotos-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/970021_340092086124247_1039197490_n.jpg)
very cool 8)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/3638707712/hEDA1B4AF/)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on July 30, 2013, 04:01:45 PM
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/3638707712/hEDA1B4AF/)
Better
him as Dracula than Luke Evans!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
(http://www.baconwrappedmedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/194217802650403433_4IYg59EW_c.jpg)
(http://img-cache.cdn.gaiaonline.com/3bc34e7e5559f7987b83d1c5fba4ca79/http://i1086.photobucket.com/albums/j453/CocoSaysRawr/funny-twilight-and-harry-potter-pictures-harry-potter-vs-twilight-14685877-400-4981.gif)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img541/7472/f98q.jpg)
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/funny-star-wars-disney-pictures-31.jpg)
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8108/8518979531_b8b6358920_z.jpg)
An Irish man walked OUT of a bar...
Yes, it really DID happen!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/mkee_zps3b36e6be.jpg)
(http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-disney-princess-kid-jasmine.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img96/8378/c9ta.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 01, 2013, 12:37:06 AM
(http://imageshack.us/a/img96/8378/c9ta.jpg)
LOL! Nice one, Fester! ;D
(http://uprapide.com/images/invite/joke.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/shrk_zps494a42be.jpg)
(http://www.justsaypictures.com/images/jaws.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/srkrace_zps5d398f5f.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/FEeuJ.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/srkski_zpse86af04d.jpg)
(http://www.funnycutestuff.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/great-white-teeth-shark-with-colgate.jpg)
It has begun...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/zmgnlawn_zps5e6ff810.jpg)
ZOMBIFY your gnomes
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bfaf_zpsdd6b7a05.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/gntee_zps2f7ea02d.jpg)
HALLOWEEN costume idea
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/gncos_zps37ed32b7.jpg)
Jabba's new "staff"
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/funny-star-wars-disney-pictures-21.jpg)
(http://img38.imageshack.us/img38/7445/mxu0.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/38/mxu0.jpg/)
(http://doblelol.com/thumbs/very-funny-signs_4562763867685580.jpg)
'Just reachin'-out to give you a big bear hug, baby!
>:D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/reach_zps51175107.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 04, 2013, 01:37:06 PM
(http://img38.imageshack.us/img38/7445/mxu0.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/38/mxu0.jpg/)
CLASSIC
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/brhlth_zps5418e43e.jpg)
And it took a funded scientific study to determine that???
Some days, that is the only way I know if my heart is still beating . . . ;)
I gotta start writing grant proposals again! ::)
Here is one from the No kidding file:
(http://imageshack.us/a/img834/9192/lzfp.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 04, 2013, 06:49:48 PM
And it took a funded scientific study to determine that???
Some days, that is the only way I know if my heart is still beating . . . ;)
I gotta start writing grant proposals again! ::)
Here is one from the No kidding file:
(http://imageshack.us/a/img834/9192/lzfp.jpg)
Not just killed.......but...killed to death.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/colbr_zpsfd24a5fa.jpg)
Maybe it is just me, but I never thought it was a good idea to look down the business end of a weapon. I was rather surprised that Star Wars didn't end at this scene.
(http://imageshack.us/a/img10/9421/hclo.jpg)
(http://www.thefunnyblog.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/The-New-Death-Star-funny-star-wars-pics.jpg)
(http://foododdity.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Death-star-bbq1.jpg)
(http://www.nedhardy.com/wp-content/uploads/images/2013/may/funny_star_wars/funny_star_wars_pictures_14.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 04, 2013, 10:10:23 PM
(http://www.nedhardy.com/wp-content/uploads/images/2013/may/funny_star_wars/funny_star_wars_pictures_14.jpg)
A preview of the next trooper to be strangled...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/crcl_zps6015d387.jpg)
(http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTCF-_6XMVCh-SVdTWIKzor1W-WpPJ96BGBUHaXFua-TnTp8kyo)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 05, 2013, 03:59:19 PM
(http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTCF-_6XMVCh-SVdTWIKzor1W-WpPJ96BGBUHaXFua-TnTp8kyo)
LOVE IT !!! Creature humor is extra cool.
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5281/5271074756_68e334e64d_z.jpg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2kx99nx0g1rsykj4o1_500.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img593/3019/anvk.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 06, 2013, 11:13:26 PM
(http://imageshack.us/a/img593/3019/anvk.jpg)
If this were real, this would be hilarious. Zombie LOL
Of course, there's the whole matter of the front side of the test.
Quote from: aura of foreboding on August 07, 2013, 12:46:37 AM
If this were real, this would be hilarious. Zombie LOL
Of course, there's the whole matter of the front side of the test.
Sadly, this
could be real and thus
wouldn't be hilarious -- it would just further highlight the ongoing de-evolution of society.
(http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/97000/Chumlee-Meets-the-Wolfman---97490.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 07, 2013, 01:00:03 AM
Sadly, this could be real and thus wouldn't be hilarious -- it would just further highlight the ongoing de-evolution of society.
Maybe he/she's a math kid? :laugh:
(http://anguishedrepose.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/facehugger-five-dollar-bill.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img10/6651/29m9.jpg)
(http://funny-pics.co/wp-content/uploads/funny-alien-image-445x299.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img42/4952/a1yy.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 10, 2013, 12:06:43 AM
(http://imageshack.us/a/img42/4952/a1yy.jpg)
Bill Cosby rocks.
Bill Murray ricks.
Billy Shakes a Speer rocks.
8) 8) 8)
Ok... and Mr. Bill rocks as well.
brew cheers to you and yours!
8) health and happiness
Who would win? Jason vs Rambo...I'd bet on Johnny Rambo... 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/jr_zpsdc2a0fbe.jpg)
(http://dezolutions.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/cat-riding-a-bike-3j2dedhnaz.gif)
Batman, that made my day. ;D
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5w5juymys1rxnho0o1_1280.png)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/tick.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/tick.jpg.html)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/muppet.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/muppet.jpg.html)
"Oh Michael, how could you?"
(http://www.oddee.com/_media/imgs/articles/a330_x5.jpg)
Snuff Box - Chris Lee (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vGkgC_5Ppo#ws)
A sonic fart was unleashed, a lesson was learned, and the crowd no longer made fun of his hairstyle...
(http://www.b3tards.com/u/6dd5c3331b83742a3e3d/gonk_fart_monster.jpg)
(http://funny-pics-fun.com/wp-content/uploads/Funny-Werewolf-Full-Moon-For-A-Perfect-Hairy-Mutation-5.jpg)
Reminds me of my Chihuahua, Skeets. I think he might actually be a mini werewolf. He has kind of a bad attitude.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/caption.jpg)
(http://static.lolyard.com/lol/photo-flash.jpg)
(http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTjG8jQOD6kXc874b10cSfsm999t0eLUGYwGnBPFmetjwu9_GIY)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/engagain_zps4fd53f6d.jpg)
(http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQj0D0iU-58Pcqqb3L59mJFqZrA1oTDDu1KdSEfsGZTeB6xzV3o)
(http://www.ireviewcostumes.com/wp-content/uploads/ronald-mcdonald.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_733064139jpg_zps48cf43d4.jpg)
I don't know if this is humor, or hentai. I just know I laughed!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://www.whatthefett.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/500x_c-3p0-tape-dispenser1.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 17, 2013, 06:53:32 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_733064139jpg_zps48cf43d4.jpg)
I don't know if this is humor, or hentai. I just know I laughed!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
If it was hentai, a) you couldn't post it here, and b) Leia Orgasma...er....Organa would attain the shape of R2-D2....intermittently.
Quote from: horrorhunter on August 17, 2013, 08:41:30 PMIf it was hentai, a) you couldn't post it here, and b) Leah Orgasma...er....Organa would attain the shape of R2-D2....intermittently.
Remember, Artoo has a periscope!
"Up periscope! Down periscope! Up periscope! Down periscope! Up! Down! Up!..."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://imageshack.us/a/img547/5270/wo51.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 17, 2013, 08:45:12 PM
Remember, Artoo has a periscope!
"Up periscope! Down periscope! Up periscope! Down periscope! Up! Down! Up!..."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
The way R2 is shaped why waste time with a teeny periscope.....this is hentai were talkin'.
Quote from: horrorhunter on August 17, 2013, 08:48:22 PM
The way R2 is shaped why waste time with a teeny periscope.....this is hentai were talkin'.
Kenny Baker likes it!!(http://www.thehunchblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/baker-r2d2.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 17, 2013, 08:52:17 PMKenny Baker likes it!!
(http://www.thehunchblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/baker-r2d2.jpg)
In that case, he could be considered "born again"...repeatedly!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 17, 2013, 08:57:16 PM
In that case, he could be considered "born again"...repeatedly!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Dude, I could get religion for that kinda deal! ;)
(http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0bfuyKr031r5ur0ho1_500.gif)
(https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRp099S0m5QBe68LdzISzf5Nn2gHQrUA0RDCKNbD24iZnVECHrOHw)
(http://rachewbacca.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/star-wars-charisma-lando-chewbacca1.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1620950621jpg_zps51d13f30.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8d2nzfzGY1rw29eto1_500.gif)
What to expect from Star Wars VII .
STAR WARS VII - RETURN OF THE EMPIRE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCp6kzXK_6w#ws)
A guy goes to a lady dentist to have a tooth extracted.
She pulled out a large syringe to give an anesthetic shot.
"No way, no needles! I hate needles!" the man said.
So she started to hook up the nitrous oxide tank,and the man said, "I can't do the gas thing".
Just the thought of having a mask on my face suffocates me!
The dentist then asked the patient if he had any objections to taking a pill.
"No," he says, "I'm fine with pills."
The dentist gave him two little blue pills and he swallowed them.
"What are those?" he asked.
"Viagra," she replied.
"I'll be damned," said the patient, "I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer."
"It doesn't," said the dentist, "But it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."
(http://www.ebcak.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/viagra_levitation_magic_act.jpg)
(http://blogs.browardpalmbeach.com/shortorder/cops-dunkin-donuts%202.jpg)
(http://api.ning.com/files/Jdq0fvoECu3l6etAOHu72LDc5Is0ChSHedMflRn3605LeWgAB01gbH3r-a1exaGnMFjGWAm8Ik-Ms7C61wmnaJvec-YbwTfd/DonutShopCops.jpg)
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_QjLqcP52EC4/S2hEryEgL_I/AAAAAAAAB00/81FecIuOOJ8/s400/donut-.jpg)
(http://thoniehevron.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/cop-eating-a-donut.jpg)(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FWiE0DSu_1s/TkviPp3Ap3I/AAAAAAAAAH4/C2m2nl1wFO0/s1600/cop-eating-donut.jpg)
(http://www.collegeuniv.com/blog/Skeletor2.jpg)
Ah, some Japanese red snapper...
(http://www.cyberpunkreview.com/wp-content/uploads/tokyo-gore-police02.jpg)
(http://fotozup.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/people-of-walmart-019.jpg)
(http://fotozup.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/people-of-walmart-020.jpg)
(http://rockinmomsworld.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/20120829-125916.jpg)
(http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2009-09-04-98.jpg)
(http://www.barnorama.com/wp-content/images/2012/03/walmart/03-walmart.jpg)
(http://doblelol.com/thumbs/funny-alien-videos_4740240462906924.jpg)
(http://www.great-printable-calendars.com/image-files/i-can-has-cheezburger-in-the-1950s-everyone-was-nicer.jpg)
Guy fights bear for salmon(commercial) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPZNjtODzFI#)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/skeld2.jpg)
(http://www.myspacegraphicsandanimations.com/images/BETTER-THAN.gif)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/whw_zps7d141eaf.jpg)
The Ultimate Compilation of Funny Mascot Bloopers (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9m0zz1Isjk#ws)
Bake cookies & make your entire house SMELL like fresh baked cookies, baby!
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/MMC_zps0b6ddf5e.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on August 24, 2013, 09:37:42 PMBake cookies & make your entire house SMELL like fresh baked cookies, baby!
Eh, there's an aerosol air freshener for that, now
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/banws_zpsf84d74ff.jpg)
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/hlks.jpg)
(http://img542.imageshack.us/img542/9072/kdox.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/542/kdox.jpg/)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/Sixth.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
I feel hypnotized by this...
(http://images.dangerousminds.net/uploads/images/UBUBUBUBvarwwwclientsclient1web2tmpphpiU4mHW.gif)
http://dangerousminds.net/comments/the_original_theatre_of_the_absurd_ubu_roi_a_lot_like_the_forbidden_zone (http://dangerousminds.net/comments/the_original_theatre_of_the_absurd_ubu_roi_a_lot_like_the_forbidden_zone)
A woman goes into Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's
birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes
over to the counter.
The clerk was standing behind the counter wearing dark shades. ****
She says to him, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod
and reel?"
He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the
counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes."
She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway......
He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel
and 10-lb. Test line. It's a good all-around combination, and it's on sale
this week for only $20.00."
She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it
dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit
card drops on the floor.
"Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says.
She bends down to pick it up and accidentally passes gas.
At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes......there is no way
the blind clerk could tell it was her who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't
know that she was the only person around?
The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please."
The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me the rod
and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"
He replies, "Yes, ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is
$11.00, and the Catfish Bait is $3.50."
Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Taster Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:
"Recently I was honored to be selected as an outstanding Famous celebrity in Texas, to be a judge at a chili cook-off, because no one else wanted to do it. Also the original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted.
Here are the scorecards from the event:
Chili # 1: Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
FRANK: Holy sh**, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway with it. Took me two beers to put the flames out. Hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
Chili # 2: Arthur's Afterburner Chili
JUDGE ONE: Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children! I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to walkie-talkie in 3 extra beers when they saw the look on my face.
Chili # 3: Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.
JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers.
FRANK: Call the EPA, I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting sh**-faced.
Chili # 4: Bubba's Black Magic
JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Sally, the bar maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills; that 300 lb. bitch is starting to look HOT, just like this nuclear-waste I'm eating.
Chili # 5: Linda's Legal Lip Remover
JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
FRANK: My ears are ringing, and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks!
Chili # 6: Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers.
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone!
Chili # 7: Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili
JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about Judge Number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a damn thing. I've lost the sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like sh** to match my damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it, I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4 inch hole in my stomach.
Chili # 8: Helen's Mount Saint Chili
JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced chili, neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 passed out, fell and pulled the chili pot on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor Yank.
FRANK: -------------- (editor's note: Judge #3 was unable To report)
Read carefully
(https://sphotos-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/6471_559507330766822_830661439_n.jpg)
Quote from: Scatter on August 27, 2013, 07:39:36 PM
Read carefully
(https://sphotos-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/6471_559507330766822_830661439_n.jpg)
So, that's the opposite of Little Richard? ::)
(http://cdn.iwastesomuchtime.com/February-23-2012-17-23-48-Selection012.jpeg)
Quote from: Fester on August 27, 2013, 10:06:40 PM
So, that's the opposite of Little Richard? ::)
Little Richard must have been the handgun.
(https://sphotos-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/q71/1237026_10152208184859988_156370416_n.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on August 27, 2013, 10:06:40 PM
So, that's the opposite of Little Richard? ::)
"Get 'Big Dick' and be evvied by every boy in town" I wonder what town they're talking about? :P
(http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/97500/A-Future-Legacy-Of-Dick---97644.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-514176686jpg_zps8bc6db91.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1806591398jpg_zps29e7b958.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 29, 2013, 10:17:35 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_1806591398jpg_zps29e7b958.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Besides cleaning myself?
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-1766335927jpg_zpsb3460415.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://static03.mediaite.com/themarysue/uploads/gallery/villain-day-off/michael-myers-irons-the-jumpsuit.jpg)
Quote from: Haunted hearse on August 28, 2013, 11:59:14 AM
"Get 'Big Dick' and be evvied by every boy in town" I wonder what town they're talking about? :P
Johnsonville.
That's the place that makes all those sausages. (Think about
that the next time you buy a pack of Stadium Brats.)
(http://d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net/image_cache/1368551745672769.png)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/warninglabel1.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/facebook_-978854212jpg_zps51c1eabd.jpg)
(http://yotamak.blogs.com/.a/6a00d8341c145e53ef01116838ebd8970c-800wi)
And we wonder how she got the way she is now! ::)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Zackuth on August 29, 2013, 10:30:17 PM
Besides cleaning myself?
I would use my bear-strength mace spray, which I always carry. That beast would be kicked to the curb and terminated.
You'd mace the cute widdle doggie? :o
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 30, 2013, 10:13:11 PM
And we wonder how she got the way she is now! ::)
Who wonders? She thinks that's an Aurora Frankenstein kit!
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSkdaKzqisks5ZK7ONV5t8rKmNFd4ZdF7B_BDmdUK7CGYjpEM36)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 31, 2013, 06:48:41 PMWho wonders? She thinks that's an Aurora Frankenstein kit!
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSkdaKzqisks5ZK7ONV5t8rKmNFd4ZdF7B_BDmdUK7CGYjpEM36)
More likely, she thinks it's the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man, and that it's edible! ::)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on August 30, 2013, 11:51:51 PM
You'd mace the cute widdle doggie? :o
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
I'd never mace ANY cute doggie. My wifey and I just enjoyed several cool doggies passing by us during our 3 mi sunset walk...cheers!
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on August 30, 2013, 08:35:39 AM
Johnsonville.
That's the place that makes all those sausages. (Think about that the next time you buy a pack of Stadium Brats.)
Or worse yet: Cocktail wieners ::)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on August 31, 2013, 06:48:41 PM
Who wonders? She thinks that's an Aurora Frankenstein kit!
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSkdaKzqisks5ZK7ONV5t8rKmNFd4ZdF7B_BDmdUK7CGYjpEM36)
Just another lady who inspires teenagers to dress like call girls. >:D
pass out drunk and you may become a duct tape mummy
(http://www.funnypica.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Funny-Drunk-People-Picture-28.jpg)
(http://cdn.motinetwork.net/demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/1005/gilligans-islandof-the-dead-gilligan-gilligan-s-islande-isle-demotivational-poster-1273437881.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img571/6297/xcbm.jpg)
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead (http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead)
Quote from: Fester on September 01, 2013, 06:12:33 PM(http://imageshack.us/a/img571/6297/xcbm.jpg)
Awesome!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on September 01, 2013, 06:13:12 PM
Awesome!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
I thought so too.
It's a T shirt for sale on the website Neatorama
Had to buy one!
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead (http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead)
Quote from: Fester on September 01, 2013, 06:25:51 PM
I thought so too.
It's a T shirt for sale on the website Neatorama
Had to buy one!
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead (http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead)
Love Frank's attitude!
Quote from: Fester on September 01, 2013, 06:25:51 PM
I thought so too.
It's a T shirt for sale on the website Neatorama
Had to buy one!
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead (http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Original-Walking-Dead)
They are going to sell a LOT of shirt! cheers! 8)
(https://s3.teefury.com/products_large_images/1374525826_b-MCO-Coast.png)
http://www.teefury.com/gallery/2511/Coast_of_the_Titans/ (http://www.teefury.com/gallery/2511/Coast_of_the_Titans/)
(http://moviesblog.mtv.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/bride_helen.jpg)
William Shakespeare and Christopher Marlowe, two of the greatest English playwrights, would meet occasionally for a stroll in the countryside beyond the edge of London's growing theatre district.
On their walks, they would bounce ideas for plays and characters off each other.
One day, the two encountered an elderly man with a very straight back and very bandy legs. After the old man passed by, Shakespeare turned to his colleague and said:
"Marlowe, if you were to include that man in your next play, how would you introduce him?"
Without any hesitation, Marlowe replied: "Lo! Here comes a venerable gent, his back is straight, though his legs are bent."
Marlowe then said: "Will, how would you put it?"
Shakespeare pondered a moment then said: "What manner of man is this, who approaches with balls in parenthesis?"
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/f5ed433b4ab39d0392eb5a90872d62bd/tumblr_mgqwqePvHW1retv5ko1_500.jpg)
Looks like the school year has started . . .
(http://img825.imageshack.us/img825/416/3b2k.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/825/3b2k.jpg/)
Nice one, Fester.
(http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/bloguploads/school-motivator-shcool.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/crfs_zps9ea01619.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on September 04, 2013, 12:50:32 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/crfs_zps9ea01619.jpg)
Too bad that number's Xed out. Taking it for a spin might be just the thing. I might have to test it repeatedly however, just to be sure. ;)
Quote from: horrorhunter on September 04, 2013, 06:35:59 PMToo bad that number's Xed out. Taking it for a spin might be just the thing. I might have to test it repeatedly however, just to be sure. ;)
Your mileage may vary. ::)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
'Thought the smoke monster that I saw today was funny. 'Couldn't take it seriously.
It's not a Halloween decoration...but a good concept for one...hmmm...
(http://www.snoutypig.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/smoke-monster-parallax-03.gif)
There's more than one kind of smoke monster.
(http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/_/53397753/Cheech++Chong+dsn236.gif)
"Hey man...see what too much smoking does?!!"
(http://i1210.photobucket.com/albums/cc406/akatemple/Screenshots/CheechMarin.png)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on September 06, 2013, 08:34:22 PM
"Hey man...see what too much smoking does?!!"
(http://i1210.photobucket.com/albums/cc406/akatemple/Screenshots/CheechMarin.png)
I forgot which movie that is from, but that has to be Cheech. He has a mustache gap due to an old scar.
Salma was SMOKIN'....the GOOD way! >:D >:D >:D
(http://i2.listal.com/image/156287/600full-from-dusk-till-dawn-poster.jpg)
ALL HAIL SATANICO PANDEMONIUM! Zombie In Luv
A biker told me about these today. Funny, since I don't eat chicken (seafood only)...
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSCQOBHPJJM-cKXsKrCWDid8PBrCrCWAiyrV8dkRlefqrVQCO5UlA)
I'm sure they will do very well after seeing how many people BBQ on their front porch.
Shucks, them chips would probably go well with the BBQ critters. >:D
Quote from: horrorhunter on September 06, 2013, 08:42:25 PM
Salma was SMOKIN'....the GOOD way! >:D >:D >:D
(http://i2.listal.com/image/156287/600full-from-dusk-till-dawn-poster.jpg)
ALL HAIL SATANICO PANDEMONIUM! Zombie In Luv
There's actually at least one town in Africa that worships her.
(http://static.businessinsider.com/image/5227b175eab8ea7426edd936-1200/this-art-car-filled-with-barbies-looked-fun.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on September 07, 2013, 11:05:33 AM
(http://static.businessinsider.com/image/5227b175eab8ea7426edd936-1200/this-art-car-filled-with-barbies-looked-fun.jpg)
NICE find !
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/wrknt_zpsdbaa8cd7.jpg)
(http://www.funandmusic.biz/funny-pic-Halloween%2Bno_candy.gif)
Quote from: The Batman on September 06, 2013, 08:41:14 PM
I forgot which movie that is from, but that has to be Cheech. He has a mustache gap due to an old scar.
The same movie Selma Hayek was in.
From Dusk Till DawnCheech's character Chet was once listed as one of the
wussiest vampires in movie history.
http://www.reelz.com/article/746/top-10-wussiest-vampires/ (http://www.reelz.com/article/746/top-10-wussiest-vampires/)
(http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/5135/c79b.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/208/c79b.jpg/)
And every time I go there . . . it's Carlos!
Doesn't he ever take a day off? ::)
Good one, Fester!!
(http://media.veryfunnypics.eu/2013/04/funny-picture-meanwhile-at-taco-bell.jpg)
At Barnacle Bill's:
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7371/9711066085_a42480283f_o.jpg)
(http://1-ps.googleusercontent.com/x/www.trendhunter.com/cdn.trendhunterstatic.com/thumbs/xunusual-playground-slides-fun-for-adults-children-alike.jpeg.pagespeed.ic.rS4IQZggVo.jpg)
Iron Giant?
(http://i773.photobucket.com/albums/yy16/2260841/MessagesImage1528900757_zps01b36265.png)
Giant Iron ::) ::) ::)
(http://www.eventprophire.com/_images/products/superlarge/giant_monopoly_iron_prop.jpg)
(http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b319/TaraZar/damn-cat.gif)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2v2y63D1w1qaxvrzo1_400.gif)
The World's Second Shortest Horror Story
By Rebecca Brock and Joe Bob Briggs
The last man on Earth sits in a room.
There's a knock at the door.
It's his ex-wife.
And her mother.
Quote from: Unknown Primate on September 13, 2013, 04:14:43 PM
The World's Second Shortest Horror Story
By Rebecca Brock and Joe Bob Briggs
The last man on Earth sits in a room.
There's a knock at the door.
It's his ex-wife.
And her mother.
My blood just curdled!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Q: Why do mice have small balls?
A: Most of them don't know how to dance.
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/dumpaday-funny-pictures-4113.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/dumpaday-funny-pictures-4113.jpg.html)
Quote from: The Batman on September 06, 2013, 08:43:29 PM
A biker told me about these today. Funny, since I don't eat chicken (seafood only)...
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSCQOBHPJJM-cKXsKrCWDid8PBrCrCWAiyrV8dkRlefqrVQCO5UlA)
I'm sure they will do very well after seeing how many people BBQ on their front porch.
Shucks, them chips would probably go well with the BBQ critters. >:D
You ONLY eat seafood?
Hey cool! Same here! If I see food, I eat it! If it's dead or moves slow, that is.
Quote from: Scatter on September 14, 2013, 11:02:34 AM
You ONLY eat seafood?
The Batman Seafood Buffet(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQY8Kn94sdoUqrEZ8ihKjQsGhWkUjhJSnukf9FWs55QnYXdI1_f)
Quote from: Dr Wolfenstein on September 14, 2013, 05:05:26 AM
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/dumpaday-funny-pictures-4113.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/dumpaday-funny-pictures-4113.jpg.html)
LOVE IT
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on September 14, 2013, 12:54:45 PM
The Batman Seafood Buffet
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQY8Kn94sdoUqrEZ8ihKjQsGhWkUjhJSnukf9FWs55QnYXdI1_f)
'Betcha can't eat just one. 8)
Quote from: Scatter on September 14, 2013, 11:02:34 AM
You ONLY eat seafood?
'Mostly grilled filet salmon. Seafood linguine, Cajun BBQ shrimp, blackened catfish, grilled calamari,
MMMMmmmm
He's coming to get you, Barbara...
(http://www.juicetheblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/gary_busey_monster.gif)
(http://www.gcsny.org/schools/cjh/Websites/Alarcon/Images/LavaMonster.gif)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_4596465867719_zps5c0a6c1c.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3gonhNmz6a8/Tsgq9A4skiI/AAAAAAAAacA/fySRq37NoZo/s1600/ET_Alien3.jpg)
They're coming to get you, Barbara.
(http://bavatuesdays.com/files/2011/05/jason_skeletons-05.gif)
(http://img.ffffound.com/static-data/assets/6/7e3b79a49aa3f4f7df160a9155d340028f3d6f6e_m.gif)
(http://users.content.ytmnd.com/0/2/b/02bbd80913a7962c2c92f80b3b3db54d.gif)
:laugh:
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/onphaa_zpsb2a86ad7.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7775872000/h384068E7/)
ED209 malfunctions (1987) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rfl4PqIXIdg#)
(http://lefunny.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Dude-I-told-you.jpg)
(http://funny-pictures.funmunch.com/pictures/halloween-pic-005.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on September 17, 2013, 06:20:30 PM
(http://lefunny.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Dude-I-told-you.jpg)
I've never laughed so hard at a post. :P
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_49419910460823_zps20aa4582.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Quote from: Count_Zirock on September 25, 2013, 02:54:59 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_49419910460823_zps20aa4582.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
George picked a bad time to live up to his name. >:D :laugh:
I wonder what happens when you fling poop at Pinhead. Because if he manages to solve that thing that's totally what's going to happen.
(http://www.picturesandjokes.com/pictures/dog-halloween-13.jpg)
That's hysterical! If I had a dog, I'd totally buy that...unless I lived in Florida or Louisiana. But, I don't! I also don't have a dog. :P
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://scoliogurl.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/funny-kid-crying-halloween-monster1.jpg)
This "Dead Yourself" app can be quite amusing!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/92785a74-5079-47cf-acec-ab9920e30966_zps012afd05.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hlwnsqr_zpsd9a1cdbc.jpg)
(http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/aliens-baby-halloween-costume.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on September 28, 2013, 08:24:27 PM
(http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/aliens-baby-halloween-costume.jpg)
PhotoShop fakery, but still cool.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_53035078740867_zpsf4f4492c.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_4406958656593_zpsacaca3cd.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_61411516366307_zps53b896cb.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_66842176398639_zpsfca52f14.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_2276000752772_zps918ae09d.jpg)
Either way, it's still technically necrophilia!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://techjost.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Halloween-22.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on October 02, 2013, 06:47:28 PM
(http://techjost.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Halloween-22.jpg)
I bet
that took some time to carve!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/3554/gr6v.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/534/gr6v.png/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
Quote from: LP_Quagmire on October 03, 2013, 12:00:22 PM
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/3554/gr6v.png) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/534/gr6v.png/)
Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
Wasn't there a song called "Classical Gas"? Sounds like this one qualifies.
(http://lolpranks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/funny-halloween-pets-dogs-prank-dressed-up-clever-spooky.jpg)
Pee Wee Herman
(http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc311/illoman/Herman_zpsf25b1ff5.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_63026016249978-1_zpsd078f476.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
Always reach for the nearest brain...(my display from last October)...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/zmb5_zpsaafd4924.jpg)
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-if77uIOM2e4/T9F0iye3OHI/AAAAAAAAA2s/ioh8VWq8cEI/s1600/funny+cards+horror+(23).jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_127293171530920_zps5a03260b.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk 4
(http://global3.memecdn.com/horror-movie-logic_o_1999571.jpg)
" Brains! "
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/lawnguy_zps256b6315.jpg)
Brew cheers to the upcoming 10/31 holiday that we love...
(http://i1131.photobucket.com/albums/m554/ephemeralwhimsy/dude_i_told_you.jpg)
YES, I WOULD ! ! ! 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/extrabgwhl_zps76fdbb6b.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on October 12, 2013, 01:42:06 PM
YES, I WOULD ! ! ! 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/extrabgwhl_zps76fdbb6b.jpg)
Me three!
New Pumpkin Spice Channel To Offer Fall-Themed Hardcore Pornography (http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-pumpkin-spice-channel-to-offer-fallthemed-hard,34175/)
NEW YORK—Accommodating their viewers' nonstop demands for seasonal hardcore porn, Spice Networks has rolled out their new Pumpkin Spice Channel, offering 24-hour autumn-themed pornographic films and videos. "Now the world's dirtiest sluts can be seen taking it in every hole while they're apple picking in northern Massachusetts or when their fall foliage tour guide turns out to be a hot M.I.L.F who's ready to party," Spice publicist Glenn Fitzhugh said at a Monday press event.
(http://www.theonion.com/images/23/23833/original/250.jpg?9458)
"We are proud to give our fans this new service, launching Friday night with soon-to-be autumnal porn classics 'The Pumpkin Snatch,' 'In Cider,' and 'Indian Cornholers'. You'll also love our Halloween Spootakular featuring Ron Jeremy in 'Frankenstein's Monster C**k.'" Fitzhugh added that early subscribers will receive free access to the pay-per-view Skanksgiving broadcast of "Gobble-Gobble 2: Stuffed Again."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on October 13, 2013, 06:50:16 PM
New Pumpkin Spice Channel To Offer Fall-Themed Hardcore Pornography (http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-pumpkin-spice-channel-to-offer-fallthemed-hard,34175/)
NEW YORK—Accommodating their viewers' nonstop demands for seasonal hardcore porn, Spice Networks has rolled out their new Pumpkin Spice Channel, offering 24-hour autumn-themed pornographic films and videos. "Now the world's dirtiest sluts can be seen taking it in every hole while they're apple picking in northern Massachusetts or when their fall foliage tour guide turns out to be a hot M.I.L.F who's ready to party," Spice publicist Glenn Fitzhugh said at a Monday press event.
(http://www.theonion.com/images/23/23833/original/250.jpg?9458)
"We are proud to give our fans this new service, launching Friday night with soon-to-be autumnal porn classics 'The Pumpkin Snatch,' 'In Cider,' and 'Indian Cornholers'. You'll also love our Halloween Spootakular featuring Ron Jeremy in 'Frankenstein's Monster C**k.'" Fitzhugh added that early subscribers will receive free access to the pay-per-view Skanksgiving broadcast of "Gobble-Gobble 2: Stuffed Again."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Gotta love
The Onion Somebody at my workplace is sure to find this story and believe it !! ;D
Quote from: The Batman on October 12, 2013, 01:42:06 PM
YES, I WOULD ! ! ! 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/extrabgwhl_zps76fdbb6b.jpg)
You damn well better bet I would!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/brgrbb_zps5f7a50d8.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/stel_zps5855035b.jpg)
(http://www.pmslweb.com/the-blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/17-bring-me-another-smurf.jpg)
(http://humorpig.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/star-wars-dog-costume.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on October 15, 2013, 07:53:00 PM
(http://humorpig.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/star-wars-dog-costume.jpg)
That is just so wrong. Plus, my dog is too big to fit a costume like that.
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_10009357975151_zps1f78de8d.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
And here's her mate (a shot I took at Son of Monsterpalooza on Sunday)...
(http://i1283.photobucket.com/albums/a548/McDougalsHouseofHorrors/DSCN0825_zps771d163e.jpg)
So, it's confirmed...he's a butt-head.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/5042860800/h45A738AE/)
(http://img32.imageshack.us/img32/8348/3l4h.gif) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/32/3l4h.gif/)
(https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTjud6ja1LkDMZAR6-Ynmlw31lirvLadNEoY0dIZCA1vUtwFUKAg)
(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Stay+AWAY+from+this+guy_cf1ad0_4694404.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img547/2947/z39m.jpg)
Put a Cork in it
A Cork, Ireland radio station was running a competition - words that weren't in the dictionary yet could still be used in sentence that would make logical sense. The prize was a trip to Bali.
DJ: "96FM here, what's your name?"
Caller: "Hi, me name's Dave."
DJ: "Dave, what's your word?"
Caller: "Goan... spelt, G-O-A-N, pronounced 'go-an'."
DJ: "... You are correct, Dave, 'goan' is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?"
Caller: "Goan f**k yourself!"
The DJ cut the caller short and took other calls, all unsuccessful until:
DJ: "96FM, what's your name?"
Caller: "Hi, me name's Jeff."
DJ: "Jeff, what's your word?"
Caller: "Smee... spelt S-M-E-E, pronounced 'smee'."
DJ: "... You are correct, Jeff, 'smee' is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?"
Caller: "Smee again! Goan f**k yourself!"
GEICO Dracula Commercial - Happier than Dracula Volunteering at a Blood Drive (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bYr_PoVpcY#ws)
Actually, that's a very cool, modern take on Dracula. I like that he speaks normal English, not "Lugosi-speak."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Duplicate post, please delete.
Duplicate post, please delete.
Friday the Memeteenth
Admit it, as soon as you read this one, you'll hear the theme in your head.
(http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/2027/xyj0.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/266/xyj0.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on October 21, 2013, 01:30:09 AM
Friday the Memeteenth
Admit it, as soon as you read this one, you'll hear the theme in your head.
You're right, Fester -- good one. And thanks Harry Manfredini, along with Jaws, Psycho and Halloween, you gave us perhaps the most memorable bit of "score" ever in the horror genre.
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/7a35d3e093b5ab47118eb67aab950e31/tumblr_mmxd59DDP01qe11kdo1_500.png)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_64782775863716_zps1d786e6f.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_3897296105044_zpsa950a7b1.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-Halloween-decoration-witch.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img196/9884/ho5x.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on October 23, 2013, 07:46:12 PM
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_3897296105044_zpsa950a7b1.jpg)
I think that may be right Count Z...(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8218/8286106360_8b2fb4b516_z.jpg)
Once seen, it cannot be unseen... 'Udderly disturbing costume piece...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/fwn_zpsdf25f191.jpg)
Now that's kinky!
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_15117747860575_zpsa56ea866.jpg)
(http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/dancziraky/IMG_1628599491456_zpsa8562534.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: The Batman on October 27, 2013, 01:24:59 PM(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/fwn_zpsdf25f191.jpg)
Monsanto has gone too far, now!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imageshack.us/a/img9/3505/z1oa.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img837/6529/4b9y.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img191/4628/zlsm.jpg)
Shine on -- great costumes!
(http://ididafunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/funny-halloween-costumes-1.jpg)
This made me laugh.
http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod#/video/176c06cb-af5d-0073-36ef-504a79fa6fa8 (http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod#/video/176c06cb-af5d-0073-36ef-504a79fa6fa8)
Part of a new comic strip series my Daughter and I are working on.
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Underbridge/underbridgeinternet21_zps122e42c5.png)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on October 30, 2013, 09:26:31 AM
This made me laugh.
http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod#/video/176c06cb-af5d-0073-36ef-504a79fa6fa8 (http://msnvideo.msn.com/?channelindex=2&from=en-us_msnhpvidmod#/video/176c06cb-af5d-0073-36ef-504a79fa6fa8)
Me too -- really funny MFS!
(http://funny-fun-fun.com/wp-content/uploads/media/halloween-decorations.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/02/asysuqy3.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
:)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!!!%20-%201%20-%20!!!!1392559_10201543033050955_1643096695_n.jpg)
(http://www.xofacto.com/a/!!!%201%20!!!!%201424545_10201947355224073_98790647_n.jpg)
(http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTOgyTEidN5s7tXG4bWVDig3eJTJMS7kAvGHiM59wQDJHkR3eTu)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on November 03, 2013, 07:03:04 PM
(http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTOgyTEidN5s7tXG4bWVDig3eJTJMS7kAvGHiM59wQDJHkR3eTu)
I suppose that's one way of looking at it... ::)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on November 03, 2013, 07:03:04 PM
(http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTOgyTEidN5s7tXG4bWVDig3eJTJMS7kAvGHiM59wQDJHkR3eTu)
I suppose the same reviewer would say that "Shindler's list" presents the dark side of going to camp.
(https://scontent-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/p480x480/1390705_608064529258902_320523684_n.jpg)
(http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Cujo_Caption_Lou_11_23_12.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/08/gyhy8ybe.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Worst Disney Nightmare!
(http://anticache.img3.joyreactor.com/pics/post/disney-Star-Wars-445833.jpeg)
(http://memeshappen.com/media/created/9yzgud.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on November 08, 2013, 12:21:02 AM
(http://memeshappen.com/media/created/9yzgud.jpg)
Obviously a reference to the Great Cow Uprising
Cows With Guns (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIvndWcMuAM#)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-M1SzAMbCNYY/UGzSV4aLf5I/AAAAAAAAfOU/30UC901BbY8/s1600/alderaan.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/wlmrtpj_zpsceeec732.jpg)
This reminds me of when my wife and I visited a Walmart for our first time which was in Sonora, CA.
We had already seen The People of Walmart web site & thought it was fictional. THEN we walked into the Sonora Walmart & found out is TRUE. There were people dressed as wild and crazy as ever.
Wal*Mart customers: either super-confident or too trashy to know any better.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on November 09, 2013, 04:55:45 PM
Wal*Mart customers: either super-confident or too trashy to know any better.
Quoted for TRUTH...
Ah Walmart -- always a fine variety of toys...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r55/rvanesso/People%20of%20WalMart/902.jpg)
(http://img189.imageshack.us/img189/7296/ojpy.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/189/ojpy.jpg/)
That's the spirit!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/shcr_zpsd2c25729.jpg)
Since I also drive a MX-5 I may add some fangs to my car for next Halloween, as I did 2 yrs ago...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/btmnmiata_zps641ab85b.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/ia_zps97a7569f.jpg)
A slightly different edit of Dorothy in Oz
(http://static.fjcdn.com/gifs/Dorothy_d0d704_353466.gif)
(http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/2927/46tu.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/822/46tu.jpg/)
Charmin tweeted this ad then deleted it.
Don't know why.
That's hilarious!! My brother sent me this via a message today since he knew I was on my way to see Thor! LOL!!!!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/12/ejybyre2.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
That's hilarious, Count!! (I actually love the Pawn Stars show)
(http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/rick-pawn-stars-married-meme.jpg)
I spilled a beer on my phone the other day, now when I make a call on it my voice sounds slurred.
"Welcome...to Jurrasic Park!"
(http://i.imgur.com/1DMlDqI.jpg)
This image has been making its way around Tumblr and it made me chuckle so I thought I would share (the last comment is mine).
(http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/7996/za9p.png)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/rtr_zps7eda8f6e.jpg)
(http://rookery.s3.amazonaws.com/1038000/1038448_aceb_625x1000.jpg)
(https://scontent-b-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/1450188_439806556129288_498804507_n.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/dtcr_zps8d5319cf.jpg)
This is someone who needs my help!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/hisbadcostume.jpg)
Yeah, that guy is way too old to wear a ball cap. ;D
(http://imageshack.us/a/img196/8861/y0kd.jpg)
(http://static.frazpc.pl/board/2012/08/2726809f1cdfb866.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/20/atyqyvat.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.fictionwithfriction.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/fun-sized-Cthulhu.jpg)
(https://scontent-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1465253_10152442366879988_1067119752_n.jpg)
(http://s.quickmeme.com/img/29/293c7d006dc00e3a4c3cfc81f295d41c3fcbbb42700cb26072b8a7328bf330c1.jpg)
Pinhead is nothin'...
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Fb9cI3U8LE0/UI23XtaJOaI/AAAAAAAAFX4/0xiS7LqjGbY/s400/needles.jpg)
Quote from: Gillfan on November 20, 2013, 06:57:18 AM(https://scontent-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1465253_10152442366879988_1067119752_n.jpg)
Hey, that's in Toronto!
8)
Quote from: Hepcat on November 22, 2013, 02:51:17 PM
Hey, that's in Toronto! 8)
So it's a hoser Cylon Leaf fan, eh?
Quote from: Hepcat on November 22, 2013, 02:51:17 PM
Hey, that's in Toronto!
8)
So shouldn't that sign also be in French? :P
Quote from: Gillfan on November 21, 2013, 10:45:32 PM
(http://s.quickmeme.com/img/29/293c7d006dc00e3a4c3cfc81f295d41c3fcbbb42700cb26072b8a7328bf330c1.jpg)
LOL!!! This is hysterical!
(http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/121/1/6/real_vampires_vs_twilight_by_dragonheart69-d3fbmp7.png)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on November 22, 2013, 10:05:24 PM
(http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/121/1/6/real_vampires_vs_twilight_by_dragonheart69-d3fbmp7.png)
'LOVE IT.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/htrbt_zps7ebf4c45.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on November 22, 2013, 10:49:42 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/htrbt_zps7ebf4c45.jpg)
That is one great pair of Hooters.
Rise, good citizens, RISE!
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/res44_zpsaea03ac0.jpg)
(http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/1498/2a3f.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/11/2a3f.jpg/)
Poor turkey! He's the last to know...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/ctwno_zps15f17edd.jpg)
Just watched "The Hobbit" -- couldn't resist...
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7586050048/hAB796E15/)
(http://5hadz.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/lindsay-lohan-totally-looks-like-gollum.jpg)
(http://f.kulfoto.com/pic/0001/0040/jb3K939234.jpg)
Just a little pre-Thanksgiving thought:
(http://img703.imageshack.us/img703/2557/tl8x.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/703/tl8x.jpg/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/27/pa7a7a8e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bft_zps1e43aabe.jpg)
"C'mon Jamie, there's no way that mask is from the original film."
(http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/i/2013/10/14/Jamie-Lee-Curtis.jpg)
Quote from: Haunted hearse on November 22, 2013, 06:26:36 PMSo shouldn't that sign also be in French? :P
That's why he's being replaced. Speaking just English, he's linguistically challenged.
;)
(http://static3.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/foreveraboner+rolled+a+random+image+posted+in+comment+260+at+_65071b0cb31780f6e2b7d39d1fb71d1a.gif)
Quote from: Hepcat on November 28, 2013, 12:33:46 PM
That's why he's being replaced. Speaking just English, he's linguistically challenged.
;)
Well it was in Ontario.
About the only place you'll ever hear French spoken and/or written to any appreciable extent is the Province of Quebec.
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/11/30/zaqu4uge.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/2874012160/h5FCAE249/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/01/7utyrepu.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Giving pain relief (?) :o
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on November 30, 2013, 05:26:53 PM
Giving pain relief (?) :o
We can only hope so!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/01/sy7urahe.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Cornholio's car...
(http://0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/21/58/16750981455bc102f9fb8f4519c6c5dc.jpg)
I like when sometimes my photos have a bonus zombie in the background! It looks like he's wearing a mummy mask. 8)
Like this shot I took yesterday:
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/zom_zpse5ae25c6.jpg)
Some of the zombie chimney sweeps I saw yesterday:
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/2ndsatzmbeswps_zpsf43a98f9.jpg)
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/373/sh6m.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/841/sh6m.jpg/)
Quote from: Fester on December 01, 2013, 02:42:01 PM
(http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/373/sh6m.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/841/sh6m.jpg/)
GREATNESS! CHEERS!
(http://imageshack.us/a/img543/6169/lgqf.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img822/7951/v5gw.jpg)
(http://spirosweb.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/henry-waxman-totally-looks-like-phantom-of-the-opera.jpg)
This lady REALLY knows how to send a Batsignal. C:)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bsig_zps30734bcf.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on December 03, 2013, 01:39:31 PM
This lady REALLY knows how to send a Batsignal. C:)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bsig_zps30734bcf.jpg)
Yeah I posted that a while back, and so did someone else after that.
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/fr45_zps57e87d2b.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on December 03, 2013, 07:18:38 PM
Yeah I posted that a while back, and so did someone else after that.
Some things just bear repeating, I guess. ::)
Quote from: The Batman on December 03, 2013, 01:39:31 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bsig_zps30734bcf.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on December 04, 2013, 12:12:16 AM
Some things just bear repeating, I guess. ::)
Indeed...
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Yes, you both have good points -- and so does she! I found a few more pics of her (ah, the Internet :D). I'll have to pay a visit to Griffith Park Observatory if babes like this hang around up there! It is re-opened after Glenn Manning, the Colossal Beast, damaged it years ago!...
(http://i.min.us/ibc2sU.jpg)
(http://pt.gameguyz.com/sites/default/files/pictures_images/18.06.2013/1371549891.jpg)
(http://images.thezooom.com/uploads/2012/08/I-like-your...-batman-t-shirt.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img542/2146/qzmv.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/06/aza4yde2.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i382.photobucket.com/albums/oo261/8-2-B-4-9-5/Album%203/demotivational-posters-skeletor-snow-white-seven-dwarves_zpsfbd66116.jpg)
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5498/11245709875_3e172e7d52_z.jpg)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 06, 2013, 10:19:58 PM
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5498/11245709875_3e172e7d52_z.jpg)
HAAA! 'Love it! 8)
Most people don't get that joke because they have no idea what a suppository is anymore! I even had to add it to my phone's dictionary just now, as I typed the previous sentence.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/htrwht_zps8b6336d3.jpg)
They Definitely Live...
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rW7N9dmPzBs/UpGNLPO8drI/AAAAAAAARkI/23F4r5d-G9M/s1600/_BOTTOM-they-live-hooters-uniform.jpg)
(http://i1.wp.com/lolzombie.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/hooter-girls-zombies-cheerleader.jpeg?resize=544%2C479)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/08/y9ypaqyr.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img43.imageshack.us/img43/1817/i10t.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/43/i10t.jpg/)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on December 06, 2013, 10:54:46 PM
Most people don't get that joke because they have no idea what a suppository is anymore! I even had to add it to my phone's dictionary just now, as I typed the previous sentence.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
It's a cute image, but the joke doesn't hold up.
Using the reasoning of the cartoon, everyone who took the pill correctly would have hair growing out of their mouths.
Funny at first glance, though.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on December 06, 2013, 10:54:46 PM
Most people don't get that joke because they have no idea what a suppository is anymore! I even had to add it to my phone's dictionary just now, as I typed the previous sentence.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
A few months ago, my wife had a prescription for a stool softener. The directions from the pharmacy instructed her to: "take one tablet orally (by mouth)."
They had to
specify?? ::)
Well, my Grandpa used to say that someone "didn't know his ass from his elbows."
It was true then -- and I guess it is true now.
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/09/3a7u6ehy.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/09/epapaduz.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-K0dHD7b0z6M/TvUbcI1SJlI/AAAAAAAAAgM/bsazL8VaLxQ/s400/motivator3080238.jpg)
This never fails to amuse me:
The Singing Telegram Girl / Funniest Scene Ever (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ui337e5D50E#)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 11, 2013, 01:21:34 AM
This never fails to amuse me:
The Singing Telegram Girl / Funniest Scene Ever (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ui337e5D50E#)
God I love Clue. My next scene design project is inspired by it in fact.
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AEu5h_D1PPg/UPaO5q7pfdI/AAAAAAAABTo/2y9s7ri0XUU/s1600/more-christmas-animal-pictures-3-9-1-4-5-7-8-0-4-3-2-1.png)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/16/hapeja9u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imageshack.us/a/img19/6236/x7jw.jpg)
Just try to read this and not sing it in your head :laugh:
Is it still considered bestiality if you're only making out?
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/u4unydyz.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 16, 2013, 12:07:10 PM
Is it still considered bestiality if you're only making out?
Um...yes?
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/aduva2uz.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/sysuza8a.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 16, 2013, 12:07:10 PM
Is it still considered bestiality if you're only making out?
Most likely.
(http://imageshack.us/a/img34/3716/4fg2.jpg)
Although in some states, you can major in it in college.
Its called Animal Husbandry.
(http://imageshack.us/a/img801/6824/449520x313.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img4/63/icp8.jpg)
(https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRawwggHpaLULxPfTJoRb58PQC08djfeXKSTkLCjhwgL95iBcg_)
Forget the turducken, behold the Cthulhukin!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/atazahun.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/erutytad.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/17/e3aheze6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on December 05, 2013, 11:34:44 PM(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/06/aza4yde2.jpg)
Masters of the Universe? Pshhhawww! We'll smash those wimps!
8)
Funny monster??
(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8215/8378087982_19d00aafc1_z.jpg)
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2026/2112912981_30eb5e0ffb_z.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/wmb_zps5397357d.jpg)
The Blonde Scorpion!
(http://ruggerjay.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341cf11753ef010536c180e1970c-800wi)
(http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/8060/bzd2.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/132/bzd2.jpg/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/2e4umu3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://forbiddenplanet.co.uk/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/Christmas%20card%20Santa%20versus%20Frankensteins%20monster%20Danny%20Hellman.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/ese3y3ez.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/abepu7y5.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/yheqadu3.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Honest Trailers - Indiana Jones & The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFKu_bwMoYE#ws)
(http://img850.imageshack.us/img850/2577/vlgk.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/850/vlgk.jpg/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/zaby3ena.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/21/uvyge3ub.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/22/tajutadu.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/22/9yguse9a.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/506/dma2.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/713/dma2.jpg/)
Maybe just a little too much sharing . . .
(http://www.classichorrorcampaign.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/xmas-michael-myers.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/23/9uqevury.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/23/peve6ane.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, "T-G-I-F."
He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T."
She looked puzzled and repeated, "T-G-I-F," more slowly.
He again answered, "S-H-I-T."
The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, "T-G-I-F."
The man smiled back to her and once again, "S-H-I-T."
The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain.'T-G-I-F' means 'Thank Goodness It's Friday.' Get it, duuhhh?"
The man answered, "'S-H-I-T' means 'Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday.'"
(http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-note-gift-dollars.jpg)
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 23, 2013, 01:20:42 AM
A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, "T-G-I-F."
He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T."
She looked puzzled and repeated, "T-G-I-F," more slowly.
He again answered, "S-H-I-T."
The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, "T-G-I-F."
The man smiled back to her and once again, "S-H-I-T."
The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain.'T-G-I-F' means 'Thank Goodness It's Friday.' Get it, duuhhh?"
The man answered, "'S-H-I-T' means 'Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday.'"
In a related joke:
TGIF written on blonde's shoes = a reminder > Toes Go In First as TGIF....
Quote from: Count_Zirock on December 23, 2013, 12:26:32 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/23/9uqevury.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/23/peve6ane.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
I like your twisted crayz distorted world of inverted Christmas trees! CHEERS! 8)
(http://blog.2modern.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/voodoo-knife.jpeg)
Of course, if you get the knife rack, you'll want the toothpick holder. 8)
(http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/2630/nt1x.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/546/nt1x.jpg/)
(http://img845.imageshack.us/img845/2/0pfz.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/845/0pfz.jpg/)
Zirock, that is quite wacky!!
Quote from: Fester on December 24, 2013, 12:31:41 AM
Of course, if you get the knife rack, you'll want the toothpick holder. 8)
(http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/2630/nt1x.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/546/nt1x.jpg/)
I have the knife holder, but knew nothing about the toothpick holder.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on December 23, 2013, 12:26:32 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/23/9uqevury.jpg)
Quote from: neonnoodle on December 24, 2013, 09:48:14 PM
Zirock, that is quite wacky!!
Did you notice the guy's hand? The tree's supposed to be falling into a portal, like the one in "Poltergeist."
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Mr. Bean at the beach:
Mr Bean - At the Beach (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWCSQm86UB4#)
(http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/5756/fa6q.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/594/fa6q.jpg/)
(http://lunaticphotos.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/funny-christmas-sayingsfunny-christmas-quotes-for-kids-just-happy-quotes-3xdu0sgr.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/bigMiataeyes_zpse11557d1.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/shcr_zpsd2c25729.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/lrks2_zpsd4a8a783.jpg)
Quote from: The Batman on December 29, 2013, 01:17:17 PM
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/lrks2_zpsd4a8a783.jpg)
I don't get it.
Can you explain the humor in this?
Some seasonal humour from the days of radio comedy:
OTR: The Bickersons-"Christmas Eve" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQ_K2XIttGM#)
;D
Quote from: Fester on December 29, 2013, 03:26:27 PM
I don't get it.
Can you explain the humor in this?
Evil lurks in the neighborhood.
But the evil members of the neighborhood (our neighborhood members) bury the lurking evil.
So outsiders of our neighborhood: Be good, because we are badder than you are.
'Reminds me of "Be good. Else: Batman."
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/30/apemabaz.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/13/12/30/suze3y6u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cl.jroo.me/z3/B/W/p/d/a.aaa-A-funny-The-Ring-horror-adve.jpg)
Quote from: Fester on December 29, 2013, 03:26:27 PM
I don't get it.
Can you explain the humor in this?
Good.... I thought it was just me. :)
Quote from: The Batman on December 29, 2013, 09:05:27 PM
Evil lurks in the neighborhood.
But the evil members of the neighborhood (our neighborhood members) bury the lurking evil.
So outsiders of our neighborhood: Be good, because we are badder than you are.
'Reminds me of "Be good. Else: Batman."
Still don't make a bit of sense! Lol!
Quote from: Scatter on December 30, 2013, 09:20:51 PM
Still don't make a bit of sense! Lol!
Good, I thought it was just
ME!
??O0
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on December 30, 2013, 09:22:09 PM
Good, I thought it was just ME!
Dang! And I was thinking I was gettin' stupid or something!
Was sure it was just
ME! ;D
(http://imageshack.us/a/img42/8615/awfl.jpg)
(http://imageshack.us/a/img849/1429/n1se.jpg)
Does anyone else look at this and think "COOOOKKKKIIIIIIEEEE!!!"
Quote from: Fester on December 30, 2013, 09:38:24 PM
(http://imageshack.us/a/img849/1429/n1se.jpg)
Does anyone else look at this and think "COOOOKKKKIIIIIIEEEE!!!"
Immediately!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: The Batman on December 29, 2013, 09:05:27 PM
Evil lurks in the neighborhood.
But the evil members of the neighborhood (our neighborhood members) bury the lurking evil.
So outsiders of our neighborhood: Be good, because we are badder than you are.
'Reminds me of "Be good. Else: Batman."
Count me on those who miss the humor here. Maybe because I'm half German.
Quote from: Haunted hearse on December 31, 2013, 10:10:12 AM
Count me on those who miss the humor here. Maybe because I'm half German.
Which half? ::)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/01/3a4e7upy.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Fester on December 25, 2013, 04:52:38 PM
(http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/5756/fa6q.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/594/fa6q.jpg/)
Well played, sir!
I just wrapped a present this morning. And here it is! Cool idea! CHEERS 8)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/snw5_zps845923c4.jpg)
When in Billings...
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7297/11697948174_df6d5b005f_o.jpg)
File under the heading "Lost In Translation".
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/02/6eda6a3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://funnymeme.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Funny-Memes-Part-9-%E2%80%93-Pics-13.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/04/u4esahar.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/05/utamy6a4.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/05/uma8a7aq.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/05/tena4uvy.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 05, 2014, 05:01:26 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/05/tena4uvy.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
SIMPLY A GEM COUNT Zirock!!! T H A N K S !!! 8)
When you're camping out and you don't want your pizza to be reheated with you campfire,
just step into your RV, and... :D
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/grill_zpsd6626a67.jpg)
Forget it buddy, you cannot operate Wonder Woman's plane...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/wwjet_zps65262742.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/10/ujesaguh.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/28/wz6o.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0swz6oj)
Quote from: Fester on January 10, 2014, 12:45:30 AM
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/28/wz6o.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0swz6oj)
The SyFy think tank is on it! ::)
I saw on the news where they were going to do a story about the tampering of the Vortex. I had hoped they were going to do a story about a mad scientist playing havoc with the weather. Instead, the "Vortex", they were talking about was a ride at the North Carolina State Fair.
(http://i42.tinypic.com/j630k1.jpg)
'Took this photo last night. 'Made me laugh as I used to deal with repos many moons ago...
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/pstdu_zps861492e3.jpg)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/800x600q90/577/0hjc.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/g10hjcj)
Now try to get the song out of your head ::)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/14/qahyvuhu.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/15/9upedyha.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 13, 2014, 07:04:54 PM(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/14/qahyvuhu.jpg)
Yes. I wish they'd get it right for once!
:o
(http://apocalypsemama.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/zombie-apocalypse-from-overclockers.jpg)
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/GrumpyCatLeague_zps2c12992d.jpg)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/1098434_10151538955362611_2085508129_n.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/1098434_10151538955362611_2085508129_n.jpg.html)
This darned global warming, making our So Cal January so uncomfortable. Beach day tomorrow... :)
(http://cdn.abclocal.go.com/three/kabc/weather/KABC-7DAY_LA_w450.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on January 15, 2014, 10:05:34 PM
This darned global warming, making our So Cal January so uncomfortable. Beach day tomorrow... :)
(http://cdn.abclocal.go.com/three/kabc/weather/KABC-7DAY_LA_w450.jpg)
I'm up in NoCal and today January 16, 2014 I gave in and wore a summer skirt, cotton top, and sandals to work because of the warm weather. This ain't Hawaii. Go figure.
-mh
(http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1anveqUYW1qf9hd1.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/17/qebysyda.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/9e/63/bd/9e63bdec1d870a4cb5bbfa2effde4dba.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/17/a8yry6eg.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Now we know why they're called the Packers...
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_cRs0hIEHTrw/SRYL1hGg9jI/AAAAAAAAANM/fLfJolrCHMc/s400/football-funny-pic.jpg)
So wrong.....LOL.
In that vein - what;'s the sexiest line overheard in a gay bar?
"Can I push in your stool?"
Bizarro Jeff
********************************************
Guys, this is not OK on the UMA. We realize you probably do not intend to insult and alienate other members with your posts, but making fun of gender, race, beliefs, and/or sexual orientation is not a place we need to go here. Thanks for your cooperation.
********************************************
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5486/12004290645_329fe8d1df_b.jpg)
Norman Reedus gets zombie pranked! (http://youtu.be/igDzM4CyWa8)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/18/dyravy9u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tW2jQW6xtx8/TbVaHH4sfAI/AAAAAAAABAM/lSmQgOfzRpk/s1600/im-with-stupid.gif)
3 women, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde, were convicted of murder in the "27th degree".
The firing squad was called to shoot all the girls.
The brunette went first. The executor said, "We will shoot you on 3. 1...2..." Before the man said three, the brunette yelled, "TORNADO!"
Everyone looked away, and she ran to safety.
The firing squad then went to the redhead. The executor said, "We will shoot you on 3. 1...2..." 3. ..2..." Before the man said three, the redhead screamed, "FLOOD!"
Everyone looked away, and she ran to safety.
The blonde, noticing what the other girls did, knew what she had to do. The executor said, "We will shoot you on 3. 1...2..."
And the blonde yelled, "FIRE!!!"
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/y2avuhy5.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/yhu3aquq.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRxJbSrTlHchbm3koje3n80FWmFwxzv1L1zynYjCbPhP4pPL_rj)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6666164992/hC8215BE2/)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/1173729_476436215785937_1944200386_n.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/1173729_476436215785937_1944200386_n.jpg.html)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/2a8u8u8y.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/ypaqu4y5.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Mmmmmmmm...cookies
(http://dailypicksandflicks.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/When-Men-Bake-Cookies.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on January 19, 2014, 10:35:51 AM
Mmmmmmmm...cookies
(http://dailypicksandflicks.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/When-Men-Bake-Cookies.jpg)
If they turned those rears around they could have
cookie cookies. :P >:D
Quote from: horrorhunter on January 19, 2014, 12:17:24 PM
If they turned those rears around they could have cookie cookies. :P >:D
Wouldn't they be
nookie cookies?
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
This is the most disturbing photo I have ever seen. It just took 5 year off my life.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 19, 2014, 09:45:56 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/2a8u8u8y.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/19/ypaqu4y5.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: BigShadow on January 19, 2014, 02:47:05 PM
This is the most disturbing photo I have ever seen. It just took 5 year off my life.
Which one? Clowns, or cat from Hell?
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Clowns
You don't like clowns? But, they're fun!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/adare5y2.jpg)
They even like "Dark Shadows"!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/ehe8agev.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/7a4y6u9u.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/y4uvu9a6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/800x600q90/534/3sqf.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/eu3sqfj)
(http://rue-morgue.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/HPIM0770-467x490.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/u6ajytyg.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/azytymaq.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Better get out of the way , I think I have to Burp
(http://horrorsnotdead.com/wpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/society4.jpeg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/uhyremun.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-8x4Zlw7c5t4/T3nAF1nlN5I/AAAAAAAABqc/uRGTOR_RdKo/s1600/cat.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/a6e8epa4.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/5yny4ude.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/20/uraramav.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cdn.motinetwork.net/motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/1202/dear-children-dear-children-monster-under-bed-demotivational-posters-1330336811.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/22/my4y2u8y.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/22/7ugeda3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i582.photobucket.com/albums/ss267/Baronscrypt666/Satire/1604970_598885503494410_1167929581_n_zps44329cb7.jpg)
(http://blurbrain.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/valentines-day-pictures-funny.jpg)
(//)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/23/jere6uhy.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/23/enyquse9.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/23/5e5a5u4e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Don't forget an aging Hannah Montana...
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/711be38c9b097c4a75db963e78abb6d0/tumblr_mvybn5dyAO1rkehsfo1_400.gif)
(http://www.shwedarling.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/chicken-horror-movie.jpg)
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on January 22, 2014, 11:43:18 PM
(http://www.shwedarling.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/chicken-horror-movie.jpg)
Ron Popeil: "Brought to you by Ronco's world famous rotisserie ovens, "'Just Set It and Forget It'".
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/23/5aruryme.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-Jurassic-Park-fat-guy.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7170459648/hC6832AB9/)
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/funny-Jurassic-park-pictures.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/25/e5yhu9yt.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/25/4e8a8yja.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8z85v38RE1rdq2opo1_500.jpg)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-RISVcbKZIMI/TesyIqwRogI/AAAAAAAAAjo/WimQhc2rnWY/s640/Urabe_Mary+Poppins.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/26/ymy3y6ur.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/26/ju3aze3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/1471119_10151719907642611_1036986368_n.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/1471119_10151719907642611_1036986368_n.jpg.html)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/1010900_10151542031552611_1767203648_n.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/1010900_10151542031552611_1767203648_n.jpg.html)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/26/evuzugab.jpg)
I'm a pink nightmare!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on January 25, 2014, 02:59:25 PM
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-RISVcbKZIMI/TesyIqwRogI/AAAAAAAAAjo/WimQhc2rnWY/s640/Urabe_Mary+Poppins.jpg)
Seen it.
THE ORIGINAL Scary 'Mary Poppins' Recut Trailer (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2T5_0AGdFic#)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/a4ujydur.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/u3asy8as.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/3eqyzysa.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/avu4uqam.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/ynetezeb.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/27/by9ebana.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Coolest goalie mask ever...Brian Hayward (Anaheim Ducks' current TV announcer) in his playing days for the San Jose Sharks.
(http://gametimeart.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/0306-brian-hayward-mask.jpg?w=581&h=326)
That is a sick goalie mask!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/agybuba9.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/ru5yneqy.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/juma4y6u.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/yvy6edun.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/umubevaj.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.goodlightscraps.com/content/funny-scraps/funny-pictures-41.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/ny3evy7u.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/puvy4a6y.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS1EAbUPB3SrA2Aw3_0_W2XCtqCZzuQf8_NzZTU7ndNTkoaujcE)
(http://www.joystickdivision.com/temple_of_doom_flaming-heart%20copy.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/28/9ujapuhu.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on January 28, 2014, 06:04:14 PM
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
Apparently, not everything is NATURAL in Florida, either!
::)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/4yza7e6y.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/uqege8a3.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/muhe8y8u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/zase5aza.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/utudy6y9.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/epanyda5.jpg)
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
(http://funnyasduck.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-pictures-miley-cyrus-justin-bieber-twins-make-up-mugshot-jail.jpg)
Quote from: BigShadow on January 29, 2014, 10:59:02 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/utudy6y9.jpg)
If she were a real vampire, she wouldn't show up in a picture. Sadly, she's just another STD-riddled skank with an overbite, giving a bad hickey.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on January 29, 2014, 11:23:04 PM
(http://funnyasduck.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-pictures-miley-cyrus-justin-bieber-twins-make-up-mugshot-jail.jpg)
WOW!.......Uncanny!
(http://data3.whicdn.com/images/83133210/large.jpg)
(http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-picture-lips-monster.jpg)
(http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-picture-weird-monster-touching-food-dishes.jpg)
(http://monster-comic.com/comics/2011-12-05-Butt-of-the-Joke.png)
(http://www.anglonautes.com/vocabulary/voc_time_main/voc_time_hallow_1/voc_halloween_car_monster_bonus.jpg)
(http://modernkiddo.com/images/mad%2Bmonster%2Bparty7.png)
(http://img.ozgameshop.com/clothing/tshirts/zedthredz_mens_/pacman_monster_pacman_white_xxlarge_zedthredz_1_raw.jpg)
(http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/marriage-relationships-scientist-scientist_s-frankenstein_s_monster-monster-homework-dro0888l.jpg)
(http://www.mchumor.com/00images/5865_surgery_cartoon.gif)
(http://www.jasonlove.com/cartoons/00403-funny-cartoons-bedtime-story.gif)
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WOakiSmLx-g/UJClyz3CDLI/AAAAAAAACrw/nOxyChwEzZ0/s640/NECRO%2B14.jpg)
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on January 30, 2014, 01:26:40 AM
(http://monster-comic.com/comics/2011-12-05-Butt-of-the-Joke.png)
I seem to recall almost the exact same joke on an episode of "WKRP in Cincinnati"!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/films-friday_13th-horror_film-slasher_pics-slasher_movies-horror_movies-dro0005l.jpg)
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on January 30, 2014, 01:57:27 AM
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WOakiSmLx-g/UJClyz3CDLI/AAAAAAAACrw/nOxyChwEzZ0/s640/NECRO%2B14.jpg)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 29, 2014, 10:52:30 PMApparently, not everything is NATURAL in Florida, either!
Huh?!!! From what I can see those are natural. They're not artificially round and perky. They don't sit artificially high. They have length and a natural drop.
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
???
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 29, 2014, 11:51:29 PMSadly, she's just another STD-riddled skank with an overbite, giving a bad hickey.
For *^#$%*!^* sake, that comment wasn't called for. It's straight anti-women.
>:(
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 29, 2014, 11:51:29 PM
If she were a real vampire, she wouldn't show up in a picture. Sadly, she's just another STD-riddled skank with an overbite, giving a bad hickey.
Maybe we should add a "Dislike" button, too.
Quote from: Hepcat on January 30, 2014, 11:18:44 AM
Huh?!!! From what I can see those are natural. They're not artificially round and perky. They don't sit artificially high. They have length and a natural drop.
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
???
I didn't know cat were such experts on human boobies! If she is, indeed, so bountifully blessed naturally, then, more power to her. She's going to keep bra manufacturers in business for decades to come.
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Hepcat on January 30, 2014, 11:25:12 AM
For *^#$%*!^* sake, that comment wasn't called for. It's straight anti-women.
>:(
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on January 30, 2014, 11:32:10 AM
Maybe we should add a "Dislike" button, too.
Whoa, guys, simmer down, now! I was just trying to imagine why the young man had such a look of horror and disgust on his face. Sheesh, it wasn't an indictment of an entire gender!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 30, 2014, 11:43:22 AMI didn't know cat were such experts on human boobies!
We're experts on the subject! How many cats do you know that don't like milk?
Quote from: Count_Zirock on January 30, 2014, 11:43:22 AMIf she is, indeed, so bountifully blessed naturally, then, more power to her.
Same girl, but different T-shirt:
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/General%20Album%203/tits-tags_zps2fa89df7.jpg)
And while we're discussing T-shirts:
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/General%20Album%203/boyfriend_zps48eaefbb.png)
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/General%20Album%203/Virgin_zps88b01932.jpg)
;D
And again...
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PEjvFLUPTq0/UL6nvzXO0sI/AAAAAAAAQDM/Jzo_GJGpb9I/s1600/slutty-t-shirt-1.jpg)
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
Those sure look natural to me, and I may qualify as something of an expert just from the sheer amount of hours logged getting eye strain from naughty images. If anyone thinks really big naturals don't exist, they should bone up on educating themselves with various porn stars past and present such as Candy Samples, Uschi Digard, Christy Marks, and Anna Song. Explore Scoreland and you'll find enhancement as well as natural, and they are all humongous. I think there are more young huge busted women now than ever in history. Of course that could be wishful thinking on my part. >:D
Here's a primer on telling all-natural breasts from the bolt-ons:
How to Tell Real Breasts from Fake (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hyiq9suWWQ#ws)
;)
Quote from: horrorhunter on January 30, 2014, 03:31:30 PM
(http://www.deja-vus.fr/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Florida_flat12185708841.jpg)
Those sure look natural to me, and I may qualify as something of an expert just from the sheer amount of hours logged getting eye strain from naughty images. If anyone thinks really big naturals don't exist, they should bone up on educating themselves with various porn stars past and present such as Candy Samples, Uschi Digard, Christy Marks, and Anna Song. Explore Scoreland and you'll find enhancement as well as natural, and they are all humongous. I think there are more young huge busted women now than ever in history. Of course that could be wishful thinking on my part. >:D
She is one beautiful woman and they sure look natural to me.
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on January 30, 2014, 04:47:30 PM
Here's another endowed lady from the past.
Chesty Morgan
Many remember her Russ Meyer films
Russ Meyer's flicks were chock full of voluminous ribpillows. Chesty are two unsinkable examples. ;)
A reminder please--The UMA is supposed to be family-friendly. We do have members that are minors and some of these posts are pretty misogynisitic.
Rob
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/31/patumase.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/31/re2e5ymy.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://funnypicturesplus.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/funny-kim-jong-un-meme.jpg)
(http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/dbt/lowres/literature-doctor_frankenstein-monster-genius-mad_scientists-complaints-dbtn29l.jpg)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/933872_10151399983287611_1669586127_n.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/933872_10151399983287611_1669586127_n.jpg.html)
(http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/6d/7f/70/6d7f70baaad1cf5eea7ea9797fb1765c.jpg)
(http://imageshack.com/a/img39/7738/1or.gif) (https://imageshack.com/i/131org)
(http://www.wolfcountry.info/moonmuseum/_humorpics/wolfman.png)
Q: When is a Harley a dirt bike?
A: http://tinyurl.com/mono5oz (http://tinyurl.com/mono5oz)
(http://www.maxfarquar.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/bin-laden-buried-at-sea.jpg)
(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Bin_81e169_2087780.jpg)
Next year's game...
(http://www.etruesports.com/files/Image/toilet-bowl.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/03/gaganudy.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://bennydesk.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/ground-hog-helper.jpg)
Here's a scan of one of my very favourite Foney Ads cards:
(http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g434/Balticprince/General%20Album%203/014_zpscdcb0257.jpg)
8)
(http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-Sean-Connery-Indiana-Jones.jpg)
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m29ueaahlB1rt7009o1_1280.jpg)
Q: How do you keep a Denver Bronco OUT of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.
Q: How many Denver Broncos does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's blowout, in which case they all show up.
>:D :-X
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_N91xwP-lKvw/S7wIGlIE9zI/AAAAAAAAAnQ/u5hkI1v8qQE/s1600/horror_normal.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/fFJ09.jpg)
(http://media-cache-cd0.pinimg.com/236x/2e/df/0d/2edf0dd1259970c575fb89bcd20c0f3c.jpg)
(http://static.jokes-db.com/img/funnypictures/animals-and-nature/what_has_been_seen.jpg)
(http://killerkalyn.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/zombie-joke.jpg)
(http://meme-lol.com/wp-content/uploads/meme-lol/Funny-Humor-2014-Horror-Movie-Logic.jpg)
(http://i2.wp.com/listverse.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/farside-alien.jpg)
(http://www.kidspics4u.com/images/1051.jpg)
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on February 04, 2014, 12:04:35 AM
(http://static.jokes-db.com/img/funnypictures/animals-and-nature/what_has_been_seen.jpg)
It was at Wal-Mart. I still have nightmares.
:o
(http://t.fod4.com/t/e0365d3ea8/c480x270_10.jpg)
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/5a.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/5a.jpg.html)
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/pepper_zpsddc2070a.jpg)
Quote from: Dr Wolfenstein on February 04, 2014, 11:20:12 PM
(http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e179/Ravenville/5a.jpg) (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Ravenville/media/5a.jpg.html)
Bill Murray as a small child.
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5529/12324679274_70d77cd1c9.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324679274/)
FG (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324679274/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2885/12324243075_75a389b8e2.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324243075/)
family-guy-funny (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324243075/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7313/12324685294_873c52fe9b.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324685294/)
funny_peter_griffin_family_guy (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12324685294/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://slimsystem.nl/afslanken/wp-content/funny-valentine-cards-2012-i10.jpg)
(https://vladdytroutsketches.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/alien-on-the-hunt-copy.jpg)
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--GBGvzjtfNI/UDvMEMc94_I/AAAAAAAAVx4/1c0dMbtnLxk/s1600/giant%2BMonsters006.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6659497984/h0B2B37D5/)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6659497984/h0B2B37D5/)
(http://mayhemandmuse.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/lurking-sock-puppet-loch-ness-monster-fright-surprise-funny-humor-art-illustration.jpg)
(http://joyerickson.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/big-scary-monster-from-darryl.jpg)
(http://cdnimg.visualizeus.com/thumbs/cc/32/humor,wtf-cc324321f6d10c12bc7bf13c04e14e90_h.jpg)
(http://i519.photobucket.com/albums/u356/tikarri/humor%20II/entertainment_tv-series_300x225_101163_-_cookie_monster.jpg)
(http://www.meh.ro/original/2010_05/meh.ro4161.jpg)
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m838huQEyH1qemxfbo1_500.jpg)
(http://www.sonofnostalgiazone.com/prodimages/MonsterGreetings021b.jpg)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9pxhwHCTM1qa02qlo1_500.jpg)
(http://lh6.ggpht.com/_Ek1QPFXmY80/TI_ALKI-TMI/AAAAAAAAFlA/3o-1JEmm5vM/tea-party-monster.jpg)
(http://d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net/image_cache/1377505766481368.jpg)
(http://community.fpsnation.com/uploads/monthly_07_2012/post-6-0-84656800-1341928588_thumb.jpg)
(http://www.humordevil.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/monster.png)
For Musical Fun......
My favorite fun Group
The Rutles
Album "Ouch"
The Rutles - Ouch! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVFRgoQe86U#)
(http://static2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130503201218/rutlesriki/images/4/44/Ouch.JPG)
In honor of Mark ( UP )
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/elvis_zpsf6873a6f.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/07/uzydyqu2.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/07/ejyquqa7.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Media hotel in Sochi
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BfrnyYRCIAAFZUc.jpg)
Sochi Ski Jump Crapper
(https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRI02uSk0wum0JamwfyLcSadUF8Xn1SufxCJ88vqAkFOzpohLKKpQ)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/10/4uzy2uda.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.funny-potato.com/images/japanese-skis.jpg)
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/treks_zpsf916a8fb.jpg)
(http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r42/thebigredviking/cbl_zps9f512ee4.jpg)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iv2mVg36rAc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iv2mVg36rAc)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/4998253056/h8ECBE620/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/11/4a3a7eju.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/11/6e5y6y5u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EoxZndq4Ac4/T1DkI1lwgxI/AAAAAAAAA7c/Fg5ZFNzN8Ek/s1600/Nightgown.jpg)
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7290/12473294345_65a16875d2.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12473294345/)
Redneck-Family-Photo (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12473294345/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2827/12473290965_e246fa49e5.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12473290965/)
normal_Despair_-_Redneck_Women (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12473290965/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/13/a5ubetuv.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/31/3aux.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0v3auxj)
My dumb neighbors can't spell SELL!
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7289/12516090813_42bc9711d1.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12516090813/)
funny chuck norris 19 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12516090813/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2853/12515969985_f86052abf8.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/)
Chuck-Norris-46375700186 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
Quote from: BigShadow on February 14, 2014, 02:58:14 AM
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2853/12515969985_f86052abf8.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/)
Chuck-Norris-46375700186 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
If you can't spell masturbate correctly, you aren't allowed to do it!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/14/uvu9e9av.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/14/6unany4y.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: BigShadow on February 14, 2014, 02:58:14 AM
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2853/12515969985_f86052abf8.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/)
Chuck-Norris-46375700186 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12515969985/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
Hey!
Richard Simmons has gotten a pretty good spray-on tan!
(http://api.ning.com/files/adkkZ2JcWiPWnWGQdsV-Ot8cHv2mgPaaeDk1aSfDHXtLRNLPtUNvbXpjgc*Hpp7z6bC3Gz2UiY4AuqgcVCrlJrvJrlo030hm/funny_valentine.jpg)
I normally never post active evilBay listings, considering it bad form. For this one however, I'll make an exception.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/131106195022?ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1423.l2648 (http://www.ebay.com/itm/131106195022?ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1423.l2648)
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/16/abane3ez.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/17/3agarema.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
If you're not watching the Olympics, this link may change your mind guys...
http://elitedaily.com/sports/20-hottest-female-athletes-competing-2014-winter-olympics/ (http://elitedaily.com/sports/20-hottest-female-athletes-competing-2014-winter-olympics/)
(http://cdn29.elitedaily.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Therese-Johaug-elite-daily.jpg)
I was watching the Olympics.
Then I accidentally took too much cold medicine while watching the Norwegian Curling team, and kinda lost track of time.
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/31/dmhm.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0vdmhmj)
OhhhhWow!! The colors, man!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/17/ypasuzus.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/5005655296/h8640B887/)
Quote from: Fester on February 16, 2014, 11:12:15 PM
I was watching the Olympics.
Then I accidentally took too much cold medicine while watching the Norwegian Curling team, and kinda lost track of time.
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/31/dmhm.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0vdmhmj)
OhhhhWow!! The colors, man!
Looks like they stole Pee Wee Herman's pajamas!
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/18/asezuneb.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/18/ybade2uz.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: horrorhunter on February 15, 2014, 08:39:25 PM
I normally never post active evilBay listings, considering it bad form. For this one however, I'll make an exception.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/131106195022?ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1423.l2648 (http://www.ebay.com/itm/131106195022?ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1423.l2648)
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
At 3,000 they should include free shipping. On the other hand, think how great they'd look as passengers on the Haunted Hulk!
Quote from: Haunted hearse on February 18, 2014, 01:26:26 PM
At 3,000 they should include free shipping. On the other hand, think how great they'd look as passengers on the Haunted Hulk!
:laugh:
Yeah, it has to be something pretty ridiculous for me to post a live listing, and by golly, that struck me as pretty ridiculous. I probably chewed and drank through over a thousand of those things when I was a monsterbrat. Hell, I might even buy 'em if the decimal place on that price was moved over about three zeros. :laugh:
(http://display.crystalscomments.com/1/974757852168d89da385.jpg)
(http://static.menshumor.com/wp-content/uploads/gallery/lays/lays-chips-0.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/19/ymubeda6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/20/y9ynydyr.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gW1o99qvwWE/T_vVEyRZwEI/AAAAAAAAAMA/7T4ZwDQROac/s1600/Cookie-Monster-Funny-Got-99Cookies.jpg)
Monster Floating Poo
(http://bwmagic.net/images/Monster_Poo_Blistercard.jpg)
Now Availible in "NEW" Corn Flavor
(http://img0.etsystatic.com/035/0/8834976/il_340x270.529621324_65w5.jpg)
Quote from: WnewCreatureFeatures on February 20, 2014, 03:06:36 AM
Now Availible in "NEW" Corn Flavor
(http://img0.etsystatic.com/035/0/8834976/il_340x270.529621324_65w5.jpg)
This humor thread has turned into some corny $#!+. ::)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on February 20, 2014, 02:42:00 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/20/y9ynydyr.jpg)
...killed the cat when Pinhead appeared. The whole Cenobite gang from Hellraiser are re-uniting at Monsterpalooza next month...cool!
(http://www.funnyandjokes.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/chinese-fortune-cookie.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/21/ubyne8e6.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/24/guhyqaru.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Mrs. Dracula at the Olympics
(http://www.teamjimmyjoe.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Funny-Figure-Skater-Faces-28.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/24/sytyge4a.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://gamerillaz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Zombie-funny01.jpg)
Quote from: Count_Zirock on February 23, 2014, 07:40:34 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/24/sytyge4a.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
INSTANT L I K E ! ! ! 8) 8) 8) >:D
(http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/346259/army-of-darkness-shoe-untied-o.gif)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/24/by3ebuqa.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/25/ge6a3age.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/aa/d7/02/aad702b19f3401b52cf4c2e5b1fcbc41.jpg)
(http://cdn.motinetwork.net/demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/1006/i-r-r-e-p-r-e-s-s-i-b-l-e-badass-tattoo-shark-nub-demotivational-poster-1276062132.jpg)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/41/nrrx.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/15nrrxj)
(http://www.updatestube.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/spot-the-difference-funny-kardashian-pictures.jpg)
(http://images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/1/4/6/7/7/5/7/John-Herman-Kerry-38508104545.png)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/26/epe5e2a2.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://media.desura.com/cache/images/groups/1/3/2933/thumb_940x3000/funny-celebrity-pictures-godzilla.jpg)
"Just saw Twilight!"
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lexg4vwXPg1qa58bio1_500.gif)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/26/3e4epe3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/50/c9/24/50c924434a5484d3f56642b1cef628d9.jpg)
Love this stuff!
Bruce Campbell's Soup is my favorite so far. Gotta send that to a buddy of mine.
And I'll keep the Doctor Who thing going with a favorite of mine...
(http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l291/Leeman13/Doctor%20Who/3823039211_973c2e509d_o_zpse9e1100f.png) (http://s99.photobucket.com/user/Leeman13/media/Doctor%20Who/3823039211_973c2e509d_o_zpse9e1100f.png.html)
Quote from: horrorhunter on February 26, 2014, 03:00:45 PM
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/50/c9/24/50c924434a5484d3f56642b1cef628d9.jpg)
Technically, wouldn't they want Cthulhu to devour their home
first, so they don't have to endure all the pain, madness, and death (not necessarily in that order) that the Old Ones will bring?
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://www.jantoo.com/cartoons/lowres/350/35000135_low.jpg)
(http://ts4.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4882124929698619&pid=15.1)
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/b2/a7/3e/b2a73e8b11b3ddccedebf4dbc20aa8c4.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/27/he8y7ubu.jpg)
"Chuck Norris, you say? Bring him before me, so I may tear out his heart and glut upon it while he watches, as he dies!"
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cdn.buzznet.com/assets/users15/doggylover/default/gollum-and-nemo--large-msg-117616409547.jpg)
(http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss74/FRANKENSTIEN53/1016305_10151970231983182_1825701970_n_zps04beddcb.jpg) (http://s563.photobucket.com/user/FRANKENSTIEN53/media/1016305_10151970231983182_1825701970_n_zps04beddcb.jpg.html)
Quote from: Mcdee on February 27, 2014, 03:06:17 PM
(http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss74/FRANKENSTIEN53/1016305_10151970231983182_1825701970_n_zps04beddcb.jpg) (http://s563.photobucket.com/user/FRANKENSTIEN53/media/1016305_10151970231983182_1825701970_n_zps04beddcb.jpg.html)
Where's the "groan" button? ;D
Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever
a spider can...
(http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/9619/fatguysphotou10.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on February 27, 2014, 09:00:10 PM
Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever
a spider can...
(http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/9619/fatguysphotou10.jpg)
That's why you don't fart when wearing a rubber suit.
Quote from: Count_Zirock on February 26, 2014, 08:14:38 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/27/he8y7ubu.jpg)
"Chuck Norris, you say? Bring him before me, so I may tear out his heart and glut upon it while he watches, as he dies!"
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
LOVE IT! 8)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/28/hymyvama.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on February 27, 2014, 11:27:28 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/02/28/hymyvama.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Shouldn't that be 2 hands and 1 foot?
Quote from: Monsters For Sale on February 27, 2014, 11:32:04 PM
Shouldn't that be 2 hands and 1 foot?
Just be glad it's not 21 items... :o
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on February 27, 2014, 09:00:10 PM
Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever
a spider can...
(http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/9619/fatguysphotou10.jpg)
Black Spider-Ham?
What really happened on Titanic...
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/f9c3d74e97a6791111c30b6b33de89c6/tumblr_mubhbdaeqf1qfzcnbo1_1280.jpg)
My wife found a news story about 2 guys that lost their jobs after being filmed on video while attempting to make love to a cow.
Earlier than that, a farmer noticed the cows milk production was considerably lower than normal, and the cows "looked anxious"...
C'MON, guys! Are the women in your town THAT ugly? >:D C:)
No, but the men are, and the women are picky! Plus, c'mon, they smell like cow sh*t!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on February 28, 2014, 09:31:57 PM
No, but the men are, and the women are picky! Plus, c'mon, they smell like cow sh*t!
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
GOOD ONE, Count! You made my day. ;D
(http://awesomegifs.com/wp-content/uploads/bikini-girl-dancing-gets-pushed-out-of-the-way.gif)
(http://i1.wp.com/awesomegifs.com/wp-content/uploads/batman-eats-my-little-pony.gif?resize=243%2C136)
(http://medias.omgif.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/give-the-fol....gif)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5wsx4iVqY1qcga5ro1_500.gif)
(http://i52.tinypic.com/213jajo.jpg)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lrc1boBX0F1qazkdco1_500.gif)
(http://i1253.photobucket.com/albums/hh590/thedarkpoet411/cat1.gif)
(http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_llcg81sGUm1qekszro1_500.gif)
(http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3686/12858304545_76d8b91574_o.jpg)
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Z2pFLzL_lOM/Uj7BphkW0mI/AAAAAAAAN44/crCj1GyG-E4/s1600/funny-friday-13th-movie-jason-Voorhees-croc.jpg)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/8f5154526f52969216c55ca9b57d1e74/tumblr_mv52jc6O1I1qdlh1io1_400.gif)
(https://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net/8019B6/data.tumblr.com/4331e28135fec81629d514231f5a6107/tumblr_mvbg1aL8v61qdlh1io1_400.gif)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/f0a7adf53f1322d4dfdcd68dc1941821/tumblr_mmgcisg95K1r3gb3zo1_250.gif)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/2b2d2003c51aa9ef2f2172aae3f0db1a/tumblr_mmo3i7ibw91qdlh1io1_400.gif)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/ygu6eru8.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Who's thirsty?
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/7aza9e4e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/59/1w1h.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/1n1w1hj)
At the risk of being branded a misogynist...
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/2agu8y2e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
QuoteAt the risk of being branded a misogynist...
What's that mean? You don't like Bacon?!?
Quote from: Fester on March 02, 2014, 01:48:22 AM
What's that mean? You don't like Bacon?!?
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/my6avesa.jpg)
Does this look like I don't like bacon?
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/za2ejeru.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/02/y2ezynat.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
This kids costume is quite disturbing!
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/0e7322b9d7ebc8f000853df6110a5c73/tumblr_mv58dkw9MN1qdlh1io1_400.gif)
Excellent costume!!! I think I'm going to start working on one for my granddaughter.
Try spellchecking your Angus beef sandwich!
(https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTZCZdCRH3q2QiN65l-1T45TjJffCTh60ZKbHDA6jHHUYChjO3s)
(http://pictures.funny16.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/how-the-burger-king-truly-feels-about-mcdonalds.jpg)
The evil Burger King finally met his match, after Wendy, Ronald & The Colonel teamed-up to stop his madness...
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/end3_zpsabc6faa2.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/03/e3y9u7ap.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/03/ehasaryb.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://netanimations.net/skipping7.gif)
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7397/12858721904_260f8172b4_o.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6208375808/hFA65A628/)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/05/a5usugyb.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/05/hunezu8e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Count_Zirock on March 04, 2014, 08:25:01 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/05/hunezu8e.jpg)
Show us your KITTIES! >:D
Quote from: Count_Zirock on March 04, 2014, 08:25:01 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/05/a5usugyb.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Me too!!! I'd probably own the Funniest Home Video compitition.
(http://ww3.sinaimg.cn/bmiddle/a7caf992jw1ee4nc5hbbeg209q07etu0.gif)
LOL >:D
----------------------------------------------
http://www.toyswill.com/chihuahua-wearing-clothes-blue-plush-dolls-p-1525.html (http://www.toyswill.com/chihuahua-wearing-clothes-blue-plush-dolls-p-1525.html)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6953025024/hB74FD52F/)
What Ellen's famous "Oscar Selfie" really looks like if you have eyes to see.
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2054/12962324893_79c4f614c9.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12962324893/)
1509773_711306828914706_1888676853_n (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12962324893/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/06/sutyjudu.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2506/12962553043_23baf1d64c.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12962553043/)
9461c485410e20fa2ebcdbe0b73dcbcf (http://www.flickr.com/photos/joe92580/12962553043/#) by joe92580 (http://www.flickr.com/people/joe92580/), on Flickr
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/funny-oscars.jpg)
Cool...a Michael Moore action figure.
(http://www.actionfigurefury.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/The-Hobbit-Goblin-King-and-Thorin-Oakenshield-Figure-goblin-front.jpg)
Quote from: McDougals House of Horror on March 06, 2014, 06:14:30 PM
Cool...a Michael Moore action figure.
(http://www.actionfigurefury.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/The-Hobbit-Goblin-King-and-Thorin-Oakenshield-Figure-goblin-front.jpg)
"I resemble that remark!" >:(
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/0e/7c/48/0e7c4878332cd255510ae60107f6ae8a.jpg)
>:D :laugh:
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/07/ugygu9a9.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7457/12858303985_ccc1c89639_b.jpg)
(http://www.inspirational-quotes-short-funny-stuff.com/images/funny-traffic-signs-sharp-edges.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/08/ba8e7u9e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/08/abadeha3.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://cdn.motinetwork.net/demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/1005/despair-leia-carrie-fisher-star-wars-kiss-demotivational-poster-1273101483.png)
Poor Princess...... Ha! But true!
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6494660352/h177B34E9/)
Forgive and forget
(http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/512/753/073.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/09/vuhypume.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/fb/be/dc/fbbedc7f3d77c1b65630f99f6e045605.jpg) (http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/3f/99/f2/3f99f2ca7cc7cf5e1eee04b62ff23fba.jpg)
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/frank_zps6a0664e3.jpg)
(http://rmactsc.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/funny.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/11/e6y8ety5.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/11/rururuvu.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/lenncat_zps387b4a85.jpg)
(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/PinHead_f3a3c2_150247.jpg)
Quote from: CreepysFan on March 10, 2014, 08:44:16 PM
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/lenncat_zps387b4a85.jpg)
I totally saw Lennon.
Fiat ad -- "Avoid unpleasant surprises. Use only Fiat original parts."
(http://nerdophiles.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/fiat_bates_motel.jpg)
Wish I could get a very large copy of that picture without the stupid car in the way.
(And the sign is in the wrong place.)
Love the action figure poster!
From Ripley's Believe It or Not.
Man with a six ft. cock:
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
(http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3729/12858721964_0ebfdac523_o.jpg)
Huh? Why? What were you thinking it was?
(http://jokideo.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/I-see-3-pigs-cock-penis.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/13/aju5y4ez.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/13/pa5ehuqa.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Photoshop -- it makes a difference...
(http://i.imgur.com/jnkWw.jpg)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/843/x6kn.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/nfx6knj)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/197/3nwg.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/5h3nwgj)
And with this subtle application of Darwinian theory, Spokanistan managed to raise its populations' IQ average by 50 points.
(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Got_8c605f_209523.jpg)
(http://www.top10-selfdrive-holidays.com/wp-content/gallery/funny-road-signs/funny-road-sign-7.jpg)
(http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f6/88/d9/f688d9b759370c72968c77821ea43f26.jpg)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6309844992/h09F872D9/)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6233880320/h275130FA/)
(http://i1170.photobucket.com/albums/r529/creepy1972/frfx_zps28b01b49.jpg)
(http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/funny-star-wars-pictures-rebel-scum.jpg)
(http://i187.photobucket.com/albums/x89/edwardbayntun/top%20tens/freddy-vs-jason-round4a.jpg)
(http://img.memey.com/1/1/funny-princess-leia-kissing-jabba-the-hutt-star-wars.jpg)
'Saw this one on the back of a car today, except it read "Your stick finger family was tasty"......
and......of course I thought of this board!
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8pidd121h1qznj1do1_500.jpg)
(http://www.pokerdog.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-lol-laughed-crayon-drawing-chalk-outline-humor-joke-meme-photo-picture.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/21/te4ujary.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://anythinghorror.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/633815280182898560-curiositywhatstheworstthatcouldhappen.jpg)
(http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/69/7f/c7/697fc7d6cdc1f1e9f37537dc39cf1f2e.jpg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/f289c7d24fc88c13c8ad00ef2e2b8852/tumblr_n2vgu8pTlh1qdodo2o1_400.gif)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/1fbd82a8c694f0d8ff3ed5c606876c1b/tumblr_n2vgu8pTlh1qdodo2o3_400.jpg)
This one might take a few seconds . . .
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/28/f6iw.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0sf6iwj)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/46/73m3.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/1a73m3j)
Quote from: Fester on March 23, 2014, 10:19:06 PM
This one might take a few seconds . . .
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/28/f6iw.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/0sf6iwj)
About a second.
Unlike school lessons, some commercials live in your head forever.
(http://images5.fanpop.com/image/answers/2255000/2255403_1324248498773.4res_492_472.jpg)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/838/ifne.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/naifnej)
(http://starwarsfunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/boba-fett-baggage-claim.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/29/upyduset.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/03/29/4umanype.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/sqty_zps5df4da3f.jpg)
8)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/819/hfk5.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/mrhfk5j)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/01/6edeme3u.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/03/serahyzy.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/03/bysupu3e.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/829/oxqv.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/n1oxqvj)
(http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/xq90/822/8lo0n.jpg) (https://imageshack.com/i/mu8lo0nj)
That's so? How late does it stay open?
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/11/u2y4ybys.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/11/gune3ere.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/11/ysa7azu3.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/11/5u5ahyse.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
Someone is supposed to believe this is NOT a bad photoshopped photo??? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
(http://i1134.photobucket.com/albums/m605/knightlydv/ste_zps9fb3fb1d.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/16/u6e6y7u4.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/04/16/9ege4une.jpg)
Sent from my HTC PH39100 using Tapatalk
At a local bar downtown the owner and bartender was so sure that he was the strongest man around, that he offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and then hand the lemon to the patron. Anyone who could squeeze two more drops of juice out of it, would win the money. Many people had tried over the years: weightlifters, truck drivers, oilfield workers, professional sportsmen, etc., and nobody had ever been able to do it.
One day, this scrawny little fellow came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit. He sat down, ordered a glass of draft and started looking around the bar. After reading the sign on the wall about the lemon challenge, he said in a small voice: "I was just reading your sign, and I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said: "Okay."
The bartender grabbed a lemon and squeezed the heck outta it and then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little fellow. The crowd's laughter soon turned to total silence as the man clenched his little fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass.
As the crowd cheered the bartender paid the guy his $1000, and then asked the little man: "Do you mind if I ask what do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight-lifter, or what?"
The little fellow quietly replied: "I work for the IRS."