Just for fun - sometimes we need a little humor

[FACTO2]

LOL.   

[RedKing]

I'm impressed-that is the actual way to spell Mothra in Japanese!

[FACTO2]

CALORIES BURNED DURING SEX

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent.................................12 Calories
Without her consent...........................2,187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................. 8 Calories
With one hand....................................12 Calories
With your teeth.................................485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection..................................6 Calories
Without an erection...........................3,315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary...................................12 Calories
69 lying down...............................78 Calories
69 standing up..............................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow................................216 Calories
Doggy Style..................................326 Calories
Italian Chandelier..........................2,912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real........................................112 Calories
Fake..........................................1,315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.............................18 Calories
Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately...816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
18-29 years......................................36 Calories
30-39 years......................................80 Calories
40-49 years.....................................124 Calories
50-59 years...................................1,972 Calories
60-69 years...................................7,916 Calories *****
70 and over........................Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS
Calmly..........................................32 Calories
In a hurry.......................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..........5,218 Calories
With her husband knocking at the door......8,775 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories
Results may vary.

[Halloween Jeff]

Pink Panther The Inspector Transylvania Mania

[FACTO2]

I really need to get myself one of these...

[frankenstein73]

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

[Scatter]

Pink Panther The Inspector Transylvania Mania

Sweet!!

[Fester]

Happy Groundhog Day!

[Fester]

Since more and more seniors citizens are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for senior discounts, these are the codes for you:

ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing...Can't Get Up
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WTP: Where's The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil

[FACTO2]

[Scatter]

Happy Groundhog Day!

HA!!! 

[Illoman]

Anybody read Scary Gary? Great stuff!!

[Illoman]

My wife told me to go to the doctors and get some of those tablets that 'help' get an erection.

You should have seen her face when I came back and tossed her some diet pills!

I'm still looking for a place to live.

[charp13]

You know....the comic strips and cartoons- I immediately understand- and I laugh and/or giggle. But some of these that I have to read....take me a few minutes( or days) to get.
Illoman- I actually laughed within seconds of that one!       
Fester- Those STCs are way too hard for me to remember    I guess I'll just have to ignore my Senior-itis!

[Illoman]

You know....the comic strips and cartoons- I immediately understand- and I laugh and/or giggle. But some of these that I have to read....take me a few minutes( or days) to get.
Illoman- I actually laughed within seconds of that one!       
Fester- Those STCs are way too hard for me to remember    I guess I'll just have to ignore my Senior-itis!

Charpie, almost *no one* in my immediate family ever gets the Lio strip, let alone thinks it funny. I *love* Lio, and have a desktop calendar, and I subscribe to it so i get a daily double dose of Lio. The author of Lio told me about Scary Gary.