WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead

Crazy1van · April 07, 2009, 05:59:25 PM

Never trust an allergy medication from a demon
It just might turn your face to stone, or at best leave you screamin'
I'd rather have a plugged-up head
than have it 'cured' by being dead
I'll get my prescriptions from a PhD man

Crazy1van · April 07, 2009, 06:01:39 PM

My first Universal monster toy
was a MEGO Frankie when I was a boy
he's now gone! I must wail,
long ago sold in a yard sale
I just hope he still brings someone joy

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 08, 2009, 01:11:51 AM

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't, really, collect, much, except, DRACULA'S dust,
Or, from my Friend, RICHARD SHEFFIELD, whom I trust,
Is my rare DRACULA RING,
My only Treasured BLING,
Unless you count the sculpted 3-D ring, of ELVIRA'S Bust!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

tv horror · April 08, 2009, 08:06:15 PM

My friend the Baron is a person you can trust,
I know that in his hands this thread will never rust,
But I've noticed of late,
That he must long for a date,
Hence his healthy desires over Mistress Elvira's bust.

mike c · April 08, 2009, 10:18:25 PM

With the love of that vampiric bust
Good Baron, I sympathize much
In fact I could say
A safe bet any day:
On THOSE subjects, we'd all like to... touch!

<ahem!>

Mike C.

mike c · April 08, 2009, 10:22:01 PM

I probably shouldn't be rhyming
Twice in row; it's bad timing
But if 'a limerick a day
Keeps the Baron at bay',
Then two ought to send him into hiding!

Mike C.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 10, 2009, 09:13:50 AM

My friend the Baron is a person you can trust,
I know that in his hands this thread will never rust,
But I've noticed of late,
That he must long for a date,{*

*}
Hence his healthy desires over Mistress Elvira's bust.
---------------------------------------------------------
{*

* More, on this, soon.}

* PREFACE
----------
SPLENDEAD:
-------------
According, to the Von WOLFSTEIN DICTIONARY, SPLENEAD is the Past Tense, of SPLENDID.
The Logic is simple, if not downright, non-existant:

When you're PAST TENSE, you're most likely dead!

A Second Definition, for SPLENDEAD, is: "Overdosing, on a sugar substitute." Also, spelled: SPLENDAED.

A SECOND Definition, for "PAST TENSE", is "UTTERLY RELAXED".

As GROUCHO stated: "We're way past tents; we're living in bungalows, now."

As JETHRO TULL sang: "So, let's bungle{low}, in the jungle... well, it's alright, by me."}

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BR'ER MAURICE: Thy latest contribution, indeed, is most splendead!
As fine a Limerick, as e'er, m'Lad, that I've encountered; writ, or, read;
'Though my praise pours, forth,
Like Fine Wine, south to north,
This Limerick, from my entrails, I hope, won't go to your head!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 10, 2009, 10:03:53 PM

With the love of that vampiric bust
Good Baron, I sympathize much
In fact I could say
A safe bet any day:
On THOSE subjects, we'd all like to... touch!
<ahem!>
~ Mike C.
--------------------------------------------------------

ELVIRA, or, BUST; a concept, absent, of choice,

Not: "one, or, the other", do I, upon you, foist,

She's a package deal,

For which you feel,

In Braille, like a snail; your tongue, your voice!

----------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

tv horror · April 10, 2009, 11:08:04 PM

I am humbled by the Barons words, he is a great mentor and to be in his company an honour to be sure.

There's a mummy loose on the ground,
Lock all the windows and doors,
Make sure that you search all the floors,
Tread very carefully before a corner you go round,
If you are caught all is lost as your body will never be found.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 12, 2009, 10:53:53 AM

I probably shouldn't be rhyming
Twice in row; it's bad timing
But if 'a limerick a day
Keeps the Baron at bay',
Then two ought to send him into hiding!
~ Mike C.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

MIKE C., My BROTHER! Moi? "Go, into hiding"?! Au contraire!
For two Limericks, writ, per day, my Friend, I'll go nowhere;
True, this madness is an Art;
To "put on airs", not, just, f*rt,
Don't HECKLE, JEKYLL, nor, if you CROW, about HYDING, swear!

--------------------------------------------------------------------

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 14, 2009, 10:36:31 AM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The MONSTERS know genuine pain,
They wish they were human, again,
They drink blood; tear out throats,
Mummies yearn, to sow wild oats,
Whilst Zombies make Lunch, out, of brains!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 16, 2009, 08:51:37 AM

~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~

GODZILLA made Tokyo "Toast",
With his bad breath, made it roast,
Nuke fire, from gizzard,
Unique claim, for a Lizard,
So, being KING of MONSTERS' his boast!

~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

tv horror · April 16, 2009, 06:16:11 PM

Godzilla is a wimp hear me roar,
I am the King of monsters I am Kong,
Japan may have been leveled which is wrong,
When I growl you'll run until your feet are sore,
The only downside is I cant be like Mothra and into the heavens soar.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 17, 2009, 08:47:39 AM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On massive staircase, festooned, in cobwebs, I approached,
This young Englishman, who, just alighted, from my coach,
Sees the fiendish gleam, in my eyes,
From 500 years, of Undead, devilish lies,
I am DRACULA, Vampire King; upon his throat, I'll, soon, encroach.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG · April 18, 2009, 09:00:18 AM

My BELOVED UMA FANG-MILY,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amid recent heartaches, of a tempest-tossed life,
I am, most amazed, to have found my wife,
The past buries its evil dead,
In October, we're to be wed,
For, in her Christ-filled Love, I am healed, of strife.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.