WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead

[long live kong]

Obie was a man who made a king, and a simian king was he
The king met a maiden and they hit it off, but it didn't end happily.
Someone said, as the king lay dead, "it was beauty killed the beast"
It wasn't the bullets, nor the planes or the fall, that gave poor Kong eternal peace.

~~~~~~~~~~~

You dont have to be a master of words,
Nor a descendant of Robert Burns,
To string some words, and make them rhyme,
Or some that dont from time to time.
It matters not if your young or old,
Man or woman, frog or toad.
Open your mind and reach inside,
The words are there for you to find!

[tv horror]

Quasimodo was so impressed you deserve a ding dong,
For it's not often we get fresh blood or I could be wrong,
It takes neither rhyme nor reason for a posting,
As the only thing you should care about is the odd roasting,
So welcome aboard and all together we proclaim long live Kong.

[long live kong]

To TV horror and Baron Timotheus,
Your hospitality has left me touched.
It's early morning and I'm late for work,
So my Poetry isn't up to much.
It's nice to feel that I belong
Unlike old Frankie, Wolfie and Kong.
So without further hesitation;
I humbly accept your invitation.
For letting me join your monstrous ranks,
I offer my sincerest thanks!                             

[BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG]

         ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~

              Not, only, is our New KONG a LONG LIVER;
              Possessing a GREAT HEART, He's a GIVER,
              Taking time, out, of his DAY,
              To create, with words, &, PLAY,
              Intuits our LIMERICK Truth: "Up the Paddle, without a RIVER!" *

             * Wot?! You mean this Dried-Up STREAM O' CONSCIOUSNESS? 
                                    Are YOU CRAZY???!!!

        ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

[long live kong]

My girlfriend is a lovely lass,
And pretty, I don't mind boasting.
But I've made a promise to take her out,
So I shouldn't really be posting.

But alas my friends I could not resist, 
So while she's in the bath,
I thought I'd sneak a crafty peek,
And risk her womanly wrath.
For it may lack the warmth of a human hand,
Where you cant meet face to face, 
But if your a fan of Ghost's and Ghoul's,
There is no better place!! ..............................................Long Live The UMA!!

[Crazy1van]

Your gal was bathing in the tub
And you chose to sneak a peek here, at the club?
I'm not endorsing porn
but beware a woman scorned
You may need to prioritize, bub!

[long live kong]

 
My beloved girl was in the bath,
But alas, was not alone.
Our baby daughter was with her too,
Enjoying the ducks and foam.
And though a child will bring you joy,
And happiness you cannot buy,
They tend to take up all your time,
And can even cause a sigh.
Of course Crazy1van, you are quite right,
And your words have taken root,
For too much time in the UMA,
And she may give me the boot.  

[Crazy1van]

I understand your quandry, I've two kids of my own
Of course it's different for me now; they both are fully grown
But yes they took up lots of time
back then I rarely stopped to rhyme
Now I watch monsters whenever I wish; they've moved out of my home!

[BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG]

~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~

             The Wit & Wisdom offered, here, I value, as being Real, 
             My FANG-MILY'S Loving insights, of how they think & Feel; 
             Revealing their depth & scope, I'm glad, 
             To enjoy My CLASSIC MONSTERS Comrades, 
             & The Humour, that, as ICONS - We're a Bunch, of BIG, HAIRY, DEALS! 

~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

[long live kong]

Well its Saturday and its began to rain,
And the weatherman says it will remain.
I wanted to have a barbecue,
But soggy sausage just will not do.
So what to do this afternoon?
A game of poker or a round of pool?
Well we didn't have to think for long,  
A monster movie marathon!
 

[BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG]

    ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~

            I, now, present a LIMERICK, which might inspire a "GONG!"
            For I've wrapped it, in the Title, of a Popular '80's SONG;
            Woven, into it, an Honourable Reference,
            Of a Sr. Actor, who's my Preference...
            Imagine JOE COCKER, Singing: "LOVE LIFT US, UP, WHERE WE BE LON"!

    ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

[long live kong]

If the monsters where around today, and had a favourite sport,
I imagine Frankenstein shooting hoops, and tearing up the court.
In the boxing ring the Wolfman howls, and swings a padded claw,
The Mummy doesn't stand a chance, and the crowd lets out a roar.
Dracula is more refined, and is different from the rest,
He isn't fond of exorcise, but loves a game of chess!
     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG]

  ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~

           COUNT DRACULA is a Poet, and, Poets love, to Rhyme;
           My fav quote, by DRAC: "So many necks; so little time!"
           Of course, his erudition,
           Set his path, to Perdition,
           Yet, that "Needful Art", of his, by others, would be called a crime!

~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

[long live kong]

If a Zombie outbreak came to be,
and the world was overrun,
I've often thought, in a twisted way,
that it might be lots of fun.
Where the law of the land is to survive,
With bat and gun and wit,
Where your best chance is to stay alert,
and keep your body fit.
Of course at times, it would be horrific,
And difficult to take,
to have a loved one die in your arms,
then suddenly awake.
But give me a world of undead hoards,
and redneck gang attacks,
than a life of work and shopping malls,
government and tax!!

[tv horror]

Dracula's daughter was certainly no old bat,
For as soon as I witnessed her my heart she got,
Here was a natural beauty,
Who to woo was my sworn duty,
Never mind her fangs I wanted us to chew the fat.