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Author Topic: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead  (Read 507217 times)

Gasport

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #75 on: May 09, 2008, 10:33:12 PM »
Frankenstein noticed, alas
he had testicles made out of brass
He banged them together to play "Stormy Weather"
and lightening shot out of his ass.


Did i mention I'm actually related to Walt Whitman?...That's him you hear spinning in his grave.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #76 on: May 10, 2008, 12:11:04 AM »
Gasport writ:
Did i mention I'm actually related to Walt Whitman?...That's him you hear spinning in his grave.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear GASPOT... er, GASPORT,
... Smoking THE LEAVES OF GRASS, again, are we?!
The yarns, which I hear olde WALT spinning, in his grave, must be pure hemp! Ex-HEMP-lary!
Now, PACKY PAUL is prolific, specific, and, even, soporific, yet, delectably, non-sophomoric!
... Alas, Poor Yorick!
```````````````````````````````````
The UMA is blessed, with odd minds,
Letting Limericks, fly, unconfined,
I harbour, not, the least shred, of doubt
that, there's madness about,
which we caught, from olde Doc Frankenstein!
````````````````````````````````````

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.

Meek

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #77 on: May 10, 2008, 09:46:16 AM »

  "The way coupling of words can misbehave
    Often cause poets to turn over in their grave.
    Shelley and Byron,
    Were out loud a-cryin'
    And Whitman spun 'round like a lathe."
"I am like a Unicorn in a racing stable. Beast doesn't fit."   T.E.Lawrence

Crazy1van

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #78 on: May 11, 2008, 02:29:14 AM »
When Bela's full moon curse ascended
he went out and killed a young peasant
He ripped her heart from her chest,
wrote on it "I LOVE YOU BEST!"
to give Maleva for a Mother's Day present

PS: Happy Mother's Day to all you UMA moms out there!
Homo homini lupus
"Man is a wolf to man"

http://www.pjfarmer.com/woldnewton/Talbot.pdf

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #79 on: May 11, 2008, 10:35:08 PM »
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
```````````````````
Rememb'ring our MOMS is quite nice, I think!
We know, of One, tho', both, deadly & fright'ning,
Whose MONSTER SON, killed, just, for the sport!
YGOR, his best friend, voiced an insight, so right;
He exclaimed, with a JOLT, that: "Your Mother vas LIGHT'NINGK!"
```````````````````````````````````````
... I agree with CRAZY IVAN... doth that make Moi Crazy, too?!
... CRAZY, about our MOMS, GOD Bless Them, all!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #80 on: May 13, 2008, 12:25:15 AM »
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... So many limericks; so little time... on my personal calendar... &, too much time, on my hands!
Obviously!
... Am I the Master of Understatement, or, what?! Here's the next teaser to start the Limerick madness brewing a-fresh!

````````````````````````````````````
FULCI'S Italian ZOMBIES are evil & mean;
Aside, from their being rotted & green;
They'll devour your entrails, like spaghetti;
Feast, on your brains; &, before you're ready;
They'll make mince-meat out of your spleen!
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON Von WOLFSTEIN & FRIENDS, B.G.G.

packy120353

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #81 on: May 13, 2008, 09:53:03 AM »
As usual - I'm late for Mother's Day!  But persevere I do, yes Ma(s)ter. You see...

I don't have to "remember" my Mom
For I think about her all the year long.
Though in 83 she bought hers,
I still see her in my daughters.
www.I miss you dot com!
love packy


Meek

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #82 on: May 13, 2008, 10:35:05 AM »

   Were you aware that May 12th was "National Limerick Day"? Neither did I until I was watching "The Tonight Show":


    Last night Jay Leno did say
    May 12th was National Limerick Day.
    I thought "What is this?"
    How could I've been so remiss?
    But Limericks do thrive in the UMA.


   A cannibal rather chummy
   With a 2nds in his tummy,
   Suddenly began to frown
   From that last slice of clown
   Declaring "Coo, that didn't taste half funny.
   
"I am like a Unicorn in a racing stable. Beast doesn't fit."   T.E.Lawrence

packy120353

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #83 on: May 13, 2008, 11:03:24 AM »
When The Creature's Mom was a young-dish,
she and her hubby had but one-wish
to open a diner
and it couldna been finer -
til somebody ordered the Lungfish!

Crazy1van

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #84 on: May 13, 2008, 07:22:41 PM »
Waldemar Daninksy drove out to the lake
to find the cause of his new tummy ache
His reflection didn't quibble;
he'd gotten round in the middle
Seems he's too old to keep eating Cheesecake.
Homo homini lupus
"Man is a wolf to man"

http://www.pjfarmer.com/woldnewton/Talbot.pdf

Crazy1van

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Spider Baby lyrics
« Reply #85 on: May 13, 2008, 08:21:40 PM »
In honor(?) of yesterday's National Limmerick Day, I'm posting all four stanzas of Fantomas' SPIDER BABY theme song.  They don't follow exact limmerick rules, but they 'feel' right.

Screams and moans and bats and bones
Teenage monsters in haunted homes
The ghosts on the stair
The vampires bite
Better beware, there's a full moon tonight

Cannibal spiders creep and crawl
Boys and ghouls having a ball
Frankenstein, Dracula and even the Mummy
Are sure to end up in someone's tummy

Take a fresh rodent, some toadstools and weeds
And an old owl and the young one she breeds
Mix in seven legs of an eight-legged beast
Then you are all set for a cannibal feast

Sit around the fire with the cup of brew
A fiend and a werewolf on each side of you
This cannibal orgy is strange to behold
And the maddest story ever told
Homo homini lupus
"Man is a wolf to man"

http://www.pjfarmer.com/woldnewton/Talbot.pdf

neonnoodle

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #86 on: May 13, 2008, 09:35:39 PM »
Oh, I love that Spider Baby song.
Beautiful moving, shifting colors!

See TRANSLUCE: Rainbow Meditation http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iz5aqIhYI_Q

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #87 on: May 14, 2008, 12:49:21 AM »
DEAR UMA FANG-MILY,
... WOWSERS! &, Hubba Hubba ! Youse Guys {& MEEK} are LIMERICK FREAKS!
Nor, was I aware, of NATIONAL LIMERICK DAY, when I posted, yesterday! I wrote it on the 12th, but, posted it, in the wee small hours, o' the 13th.... even, as I write this, at 1:47 A.M., on the 14th.
````````````````````````````````````````
THE WOLF MAN, in the moon-lit forest, howls,
Loping, through fog-shrouded woods, he prowls,
Leaping, upon his victim, with snarls & growls,
In blood-thirsty violence, he disembowels,
So scary, that, even, the owls, throw in the towel!
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, B.G.G.

Crazy1van

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #88 on: May 14, 2008, 07:39:47 AM »
While Dracula enjoys walks in the moonlight
He really loves the Creatures of the Night
The music they make
Pierced his heart like a stake
Which in retrospect wasn't too bright!
Homo homini lupus
"Man is a wolf to man"

http://www.pjfarmer.com/woldnewton/Talbot.pdf

BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG

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Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
« Reply #89 on: May 14, 2008, 11:02:57 AM »
Dear Brother, IVAN,
... This paean hath been writ, to immortalize Thy lugubrious contributions, by which we, all, are, oddly, awed! 

``````````````````````````````````
CRAZY IVAN, we must agree, is, aptly, named,
For his sense, of verse, is, provocatively, maimed;
Yet, his pow'r, of reason, is, not, completely, blown,
As he rescues his thread, of logic, with admirable mien,
Redeeming the skewed, by leaving no turn, unstoned.
```````````````````````````````````````````
Your infectionate, er, affectionate, WEREWOLF UNCLE,
BARON "Do You See What You've Done, You Shameless Mad-man?! You've Made Me Cry 'WOLF' & 'UNCLE' In The Same Sentence!"... And, as the final Topper, you've gotten me,  so rattled, that, I've forgotten my last name! NOW, WHO'S THE CRAZY ONE, EH?!?!?!

 

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