Universal Monster Army

Collecting Monsters => Memorable Memorabilia => Horror Literature => Topic started by: packy120353 on March 17, 2008, 06:30:32 AM

Title: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 17, 2008, 06:30:32 AM
Good moaning everyone! I'm not Irish but most of you are painfully aware that I write limericks. A reknown member whom we refer to as Meek suggested recently that we might trade limericks on St. Paddy's day. To that end I have come up with three little doozies and sorry Meek, I like you too much to make you bear this horror on your own so for your own good I am spreading the pain around evenly. Please no offense meant to anyone I like and any similarities to a real person is purely inevitable. Also do let me know what you think of these, only one is really monster-related (but it's my favorite).  Readem and weep:

The Irish and Martians have been
interbreeding again and again.
There's proof they're related -
both their homes populated
with nothing but little green men!

Our children today are misled.
Watching TV until time for bed.
While their parents get stewed
Irish kiddies are cued
by St Patrick on Spongebob instead.

An Irish Vampire has got to
suck your blood even though he knows not to
But you can't really blame
when revealed his name
is none other than Nosfer O'Atu

Peace be to Ireland
pk

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 17, 2008, 10:39:34 AM

    Well now, I'm not Irish nor do I play one on TV but I do have an Irish sense of humour(that's what happens when the USAF crosses with the Luftwaffe), so I shall rise to the challenge and add a few of my own.
    The first one 'tis my own, written whilst I had a cogitate in a hot bath this fine morning after removing 3 inches of wet snow from the sidewalks:

      "Fritz had a right dirty job,
       What with assorted graves to rob.
       Dr. Henry stated that
       He must wear a cravat,
       And Fritz thought to himself "Coo, wot a snob!"

    The rest are classics from Bennett Cerf's "Out On a Limerick":


       "There was a young monk in Siberia
        Whose existence grew steadily drearier.
        Until he broke from his cell
        With a Hell of a yell,
        And eloped with the Mother Superior."

       "There once was a spinsterish lass
         Who constructed her patties from brass.
         When asked "Do they chafe?"
         She replied "Yes, but I'm safe---
         From pinches and snakes in the grass."

        "There was a yong lady from Tottenham,
         Whose manners she'd quite forgotten 'em.
         While at tea at the Vicker's,
         She took off her knickers,
         Explaining she was much too hot in 'em."
 
   

        "The limerick is furtive and mean
          And you must keep her in close quarantine
          Or she sneaks off the to slums
          And immediately becomes,
          Disorderly, drunk and obscene."
         
   Today I'm wearing my Notre Dame green sweatshirt and people will ask if I attended said college and I always reply "No, but I have a crooked back." and watch the puzzled look on their faces.

    Hoots!

    "Meek"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 17, 2008, 08:26:38 PM

     Paul:  Since I've been sifting the sands of time in my room in a vain attempt to put things in order I've had to put my limericking on the back burner until just a short while ago---looks like it'll just be you and me doing this.
     Well, hold yer nose and here we go:


     "Elder Robert of the UMA
      Has many a collection---they say.
      From worldly Vincent Price
      He's got knick-knacks quite nice,
      But how much he spent he won't say."


     "When Jane & Max did wed
       Many thought Jane's reason had fled.
       But its really no surprise,
       For Jane is exceedingly wise
       And had always be told she'd get a head."


      "A certain Pvt. named "Meek"
       With an Avatar depicting a Sheik
       Is often prosaic
       About things archaic
       And likes to give the odd ego a tweak."


       And one from Bennett Cerf:

      "An accident really uncanny
       Befell a respectable granny:
       She sat down on a chair
       While her false teeth were there
       And bit herself right in the fanny."


       "Meek"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: The Drunken Severed Head on March 18, 2008, 02:44:17 AM
Meek, stereotypical librarian,
Had an inner life oh so barbarian.
She wanted to make
Like a certain fair sheik--
But was trapped in a life too agrarian.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 18, 2008, 10:58:30 AM

    General Terry is always a'tellin'
    Of his passion for a dame named Helen.
    If this reached his dear wife
    Just think of the strife
    There'd be no end to all of the yellin'.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 18, 2008, 06:55:39 PM

   "The UMA is very well known
    As being humorously prone.
    With high-flown quips,
    And occasional snips
    Its always guaranteed for a groan."

 

      Come on you lot, crank up yer brains and write a few effing limericks!


       "Meek"(talking to myself)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 18, 2008, 08:44:15 PM
I'm too preoccupied tonight to think straight but here's one of my favorite old ones in case you forgot it!

The Hunchback ate beans, not a few.
And filled his belltower with "phew!".
So instead of that perch
He came down to the Church,
taking sanctuary in his own pew.








Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: CreepyJeff on March 19, 2008, 01:26:45 PM
You guys are putting up some great ones!  Thanks for posting these. 

I'd love to participate but I'm afraid my limericks all involve "Girls from Gavot", "Men from Nantuckett" and "Men from Trent".  Not suitable for this forum I'm afraid.  (But funny.)

Creepy Jeff (indeed)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 19, 2008, 02:52:04 PM

    You forgot the Old Lady From France . . .
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 19, 2008, 06:33:06 PM
and you forgot...the girl from Galoobs (there once was)

Y'know, I'm about Limericked out for now and ready to move back to more mature and intelligent conversation.  BRAAP hey who baked one? Heehaw!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 20, 2008, 10:46:53 AM

     Ahem. Good moaning, indeed.


     In a certain European area
     Of the wee village of Vasaria.
     Locals are always out of luck
     When various monsters run amok
     And they live in a state of hysteria.


     Packy's rhyming skill has shown
     To cause an occasional moan.
     But of late his poor brain
     Has suffered a strain
     And Meek is stuck in The Limerick Zone.
     
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: The Drunken Severed Head on March 20, 2008, 12:07:33 PM
A cat in despondency sighed,
and planned to commit suicide.
She fell under the wheels
of eight automobiles--
And after the ninth one, she died!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 23, 2008, 02:49:56 PM
DEAR UMA FANG-MILY,
... Considering that we are professionals, our decorum should be of a proper gravity, and, educational, as well. Hence, i make this offering:

In the UMA Army, so gay,
It is free, so, no-one must pay,
Yet, there once was an Ootmah,
A WEREWOLF, who'd shoot ya,
If, you said, that, he wears a toupee!

Happy ST. PADDY'S WAGON!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON O'WOLF-BLARNEY-STONE
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Jim Bertges on March 23, 2008, 11:56:42 PM
There was a young fella named Max,
Lost his head people said to an axe.
Through life he keeps sloggin,
Though he's just a noggin
And his pal Jim Beam helps him relax.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 30, 2008, 09:13:15 AM
That UMA General, named TERRY,
Has an odd body, quite hairy,
Now, on his trusty web-cam,
He smears his body, with SPAM...
Reminds me, of MOE, CURLY, & LARRY!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on March 30, 2008, 12:01:05 PM
Three cheers now for Mr. Jim Bertges!
He stifles his blood-spillin' urges
With daily good deeds--
But the whole village bleeds
When he's out on the "nacht" of Walpurgis!

And what about Matsui (Rodd)?
His twin was seen acting quite odd!
Said Rodd, "That was no twin,
For I saw him begin
As a bubbly blank blob--in a pod!"

There's a young Jersey Devil called Rob,
Who has plans to pull off a sly job--
So look out, Mr. Shank!
Tullo vows he will yank
Souvenirs from your bucket of BLOB!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 30, 2008, 04:54:54 PM
THE PUN OF FRANKENSTEIN:
-------------------------------
Puts the "ICK!" in Limerick, eh, wot?!
````````````````````````````
Sir Robert o' Taylor, 'tis said,
Haunts a house, in Ohio, with dread,
As Dear Friend, of BORIS' Daughter, SARA,
His knowledge could scare ya,
Into turning your beds head-to-head.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on March 30, 2008, 05:20:08 PM
Our old Timotheus, the Baron,
In daylight is sometimes called Herron--
But at dusk, when he howls,
How he startles the owls
With that fearful greasepaint he's a-wearin'!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: monsterphile on March 31, 2008, 06:03:35 AM
Here's 2 for now.  Maybe more if I can find the time.

In Ohio was the Taylor collection
It had clutter in every direction.
But Karloff and Price
Made it real nice
In fact, it was a thing of perfection.


In Pittsburgh we find our chum Max
Whose sobriety had become lax
He is a nice fellow
And is usually mellow
But autograph frauds he attacks.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on March 31, 2008, 10:43:38 AM

   Where the deuce were all of you with yer limericks back on St. Patrick's Day?

    Hmmmmn, these must be time-released limericks . . .

    Do keep 'em coming!

   
    "Meek"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: The Drunken Severed Head on April 02, 2008, 03:31:56 PM
The Necronomicon?? You can't be shown one!
While the libraries never will loan one!
But if it's so rare
And guarded with care
Why does every nutcase seem to own one?

- Dennis Maggard
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 03, 2008, 12:00:30 PM
Our dear Severed Head; who's named MAX,
Is a particularly sharp champion, of facts;
Yet, losing his head, 'tis reportedly said,
'Twas done,  with THE TOWER OF PUN-DOM'S AXE!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 03, 2008, 12:12:10 PM
typhooforme writ:
Our old Timotheus, the Baron,
In daylight is sometimes called Herron--
But at dusk, when he howls,
How he startles the owls
With that fearful greasepaint he's a-wearin'!
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Elder Brother ROBERT!
...  Is it Moi? Or, is there a draft, in here? ... Now - Thanks to you! - I shalt have to undergo ye tedious, expensive Cosmetic Surgery ... for, reading your insightful humour, I laughed mine Arse OFF... COMPLETELY! {'Tis no cheap thing, to replace one's hind-quarters!}
It only hurts when I sit!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON "OWLS WELL THAT ENDS WELL" Von WOLFSTEIN
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 04, 2008, 01:00:48 AM
That murderous man, COFFIN RAY,
Has "toys in the attic", they say,
He's mad, but, he's real,
With vegan sex-appeal,
A CAST-STEEL Trouper, o' THE UMA!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on April 04, 2008, 03:15:43 PM
Kind of non-Limericky but what do you think I was doing this afternoon?

A Vampire dark and full of fright
Glared down from on my roof this night -
said "It's all right, I vill not bite,
just taking down your Christmas lights!"

And to keep up here's another proper limmy skeleton from my closet:

Once needing more juice than was able,
a monster lay pouting on table.
His capacitors leak,
cosmic power is weak,
So he's begging the Doctor for cable.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on April 04, 2008, 03:16:57 PM
Oh and who could forget:

As Count Dracula slowly ascends,
from the Shady View Rest Home of mens.
It's not blood that was stoled,
"It's no fun being this old -
ven you haf to filch somevun's Depends!"


 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on April 05, 2008, 05:54:29 AM
Now for a different point of view...

There's a human on top of my bed.
If he moves I can bite off his head.
But not even a rustle,
Packy won't move a muscle.
Tonight I go hungry instead.

A better ambush I must choose.
Tomorrow the closet I'll use.
When he opens the door
I'll grab him before
He can see that I'm not tennis shoes.









Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on April 05, 2008, 10:24:43 AM
Oh and who could forget:

As Count Dracula slowly ascends,
from the Shady View Rest Home of mens.
It's not blood that was stoled,
"It's no fun being this old -
ven you haf to filch somevun's Depends!"


Packy, The Depends one cracked me up--er, uh...must be my age or something!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on April 05, 2008, 06:05:19 PM
Quote
Packy, The Depends one cracked me up--er, uh...must be my age or something!

You mean "The Age of Crackquarius"? Thanks Robert for chuckling! Now go get a paper towel. Mommy, wow!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 05, 2008, 09:23:48 PM
Dear Brothers, PACKY & ROBERT,
... "Excellent, Mr. Renfield, Excellent!" Charming limericks; except, for that line about:
"hafing to filch somevun's depends!" Poor Olde DRAC! As he & I are so closely associated, it brings a sad down-turn, to the usual allure, of Vampiric 'eternal life'.  : {
... Hopefully, this is not too "Olde School"! You younger kids might have to look it up, on-line.
``````````````````````````````````
Our Mr. Brooks, Conrad, by name,
Achieved, long ago, his 15 minutes, of fame,
Not satisfied, he, with mere memory,
Of his past bouquet, of cinematic flowers,
Now, they call him Conrad Add-An-Hour!

``````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on April 06, 2008, 11:13:58 AM

   They'll have to get out their encyclopedias to find out who Conrad Adenaur was--that is IF they know how to opeerate an encyclopedia.


    "Meek"(if pigs had wings they'd be eagles)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on April 06, 2008, 09:17:25 PM
I'm ancient enough to remember Konrad Adenauer.  He always looked like he was weaned on a pickle.  Gosh, Meek, who'd a thunk the Irish limericks would take this turn!?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 09, 2008, 12:47:16 AM
Brother Elder ROBERT & MEEK,
... Who'da thunk, indeed!  The continuance of Limerick logic answers this question, below:

Limericks, 'tho' Irish, in origin,
Educate; they help us, to think & learn,
That is why, this 'bird-brained', obtuse turn,
About Konrad, via Her{r}on, can make us grin,
And, then, lead us, to an Arctic Tern!

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 11, 2008, 11:31:37 PM
The was, once, a Professor, named GRIFFIN,
Whose '70's Monsters would glow, and, iffin,
You wanted to know anything 'bout his show,
He'd show you just what you were missin'!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on April 12, 2008, 09:25:56 PM
Though real men might not eat quiche
I have a Wolfman on a leash.
He'll eat more than eggs-
he'll consume both your legs
not to mention your arms, kapiche?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 12, 2008, 10:03:21 PM
When Larry was bit on the moors
his life became horribly cursed
His teeth become fangs
And he grows out his bangs
But the cost of flea collars is the worst
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 13, 2008, 09:36:40 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Since we're on the topic, of 'direct lineage', here's a spot of remembrance:
````````````````````````````````
THE WEREWOLF OF LONDON'S my friend,
We know, tho', he was DR. GLENDON,
By day; yet, when the full moon held sway,
His Wolfish gullet was full, until a bullet, let go,
Brought his miserable, Monster-ous, life to an end.
````````````````````````````````
Posts-crypt:
... Nice work, PACKY & IVAN {Crrr-azy, man, Crrr-azy!}
Grand to see you limber about being on the limerick wrack!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 13, 2008, 08:25:06 PM
When met by the Invisible Man
You should keep your possessions in hand
As a thief he got wealthy
by being so stealthy
And I must admit I'm a big fan
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 15, 2008, 09:12:49 AM
VONDERFUL, IVAN!
... I bet you're a BIG FAN of FRANKENSTEIN, too... An ELECTRIC FAN!
Here are a couple more, from "Yours, Truly"!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Phantom of the Opera, 'twas said,
Slept, in a coffin, for his bed,
When he didn't awaken, there was no mistakin',
That, the locals were, now, free, of dread!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Quasimodo was tired, of his plight,
So the Rack, seemed, to be the cure, right?
For a moment, he stood straighter & taller,
Then, he let loose a intolerable holler;
... Well, we, all, had a HUNCH, he'd be BACK!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 16, 2008, 01:17:08 AM
Oh, Baron, that last one was almost cruel!  That bell-ringer has more than paid his toll already.

 :D

The Bride the doc made for his creature
Was a vision with resplendent features
In the lab dressed in white
She regarded her plight
By cementing her role as a screecher
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: The Drunken Severed Head on April 16, 2008, 01:31:16 AM
A limerick's a hard thing to write;
It must have a rhythm just right.
You ruin the song
With a line that's too long--
Even if you work in a cool idea about a vampire crumbling to dust from being exposed to the light!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 16, 2008, 02:18:50 AM
Frankenstein's Monster
Followed him to the Arctic
It may live there still


Oh, wait, this isn't the Haiku thread, is it?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 16, 2008, 07:12:25 AM
Crazy1van writ:
Oh, wait, this isn't the Haiku thread, is it?

****************************
HAI-Kuuuu!!!... Gesundheit!
These are Limerick 'sneezes',
Not, some verbal 'fart', or, fight,
Too short, or, too looooooooong,
They're a Monster Kid's song;
So, for God's sake, try to write it right!

`````````````````
IVAN & MAX might dispute,
the length of a Limerick, so cute;
Yet, try as they might,
So long as they get it right,
We'll all laugh & say: "It a 'BEAUT'!"

*** WARNING - BLANK VERSE -
*  Not to be confused with HAIKUUU, FRAU BLEUCHER, or LIMERICK! *
               *Read at your own risk*

{... Not to be confused with a BUTTE,
which is that usual comical anatomical thing,
which you'll find, comprising the rump,
of HANNAH, MONTANA!... Unless, the mockery,
of that sort of thing is your BREAD & BUTTE-R!}

APRIL FUELS DAY!
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G. THE BUTTE OF MANY JOKES! B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 16, 2008, 10:34:42 AM
In the interest of rhyming meter, as prescribed for limericks, I've re-worked a couple of my previous attempts... Better, or, Worse - what think Ye? Speak, now, or, forever, write your own limericks!  ;^} "Forever?!" Horrors! That's a loooonnnngggg time to have to write Limericks!
````````````````````````````

Quasimodo, tired, of his plight,
Deemed, as the cure, THE RACK, right?
He stood straighter & taller,
Then, loosed an intolerable holler;
Well, we, all, had a HUNCH, he'd be BACK!

```````````````````````````````
THE WEREWOLF OF LONDON'S my friend,
We knew him as DR. GLENDON, by day;
Yet, when the full moon held sway,
His Wolfish gullet he'd fill,
'til a bullet, let go,
brought his miserable life to an end.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 16, 2008, 02:39:50 PM
Baron, please!  You've written fine limmericks.
They're as beloved as Halloween Treats-N-Tricks.
There's no need to rewrite 'em
so long as I don't have to fight 'em
Since the monsters all live in your lyrics.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 17, 2008, 12:41:53 AM
Dear CRAZY BROTHER IVAN,
... Thanks, muchly, for your vote of confidence; 'tis mutual!
We WEREWOLVES have to stick together - I recommend SUPER-GLUE!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 17, 2008, 04:22:11 PM
The case of poor Paula Dupree
Is a wild captive jungle tragedy
Through science she was groomed
But her nature was doomed
At least in death she is finally free
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 28, 2008, 06:26:25 AM
Dear FANG-MILY,
... I awoke, at 5:45 AM, with this little ditty dancing in my head!
`````````````````````````````````
Our BENNIE, as GILL-MAN, wished to sire a new race,
The second he beheld JULIE ADAMS' gorgeous face,
Along came RICHARD DENNING, the man, who was winning,
Knocking THE CREATURE, back, into second place!

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 30, 2008, 02:17:09 PM
There once was a MONSTER, named FRANK,
Who saved UNIVERSAL, by filling up banks,
He was, more, than equal, to making many sequels,
and, luckily, for us, not one of them stank!
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
E-GADS! ... Or, E-GOR! A thread, which like the subject, of this above edgarallanpoetic, cannot die; is indestructible... Ladies & Germs, I give you... "THE LIMERICK!"
Mua-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Et-Cetera!
... Sure beats "A SHRUBBERY!"... but, not, by much! ;^}
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON Von WOLFSTEIN, UMA OOTMAH & JUNE PIN-UP GAL, AD 2006
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 30, 2008, 05:56:16 PM
Then I too shall endeavor to see this topic survive into the next millenium... or at least the next month!

There once was a man named Ardeth Bey
Whose skin was quite parched and looked grey
Known as Im-Ho-Tep
In ancient Egypt
He had a love only a mummy could face


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on April 30, 2008, 06:44:18 PM

   I've decided to throw in what's called a "Clerihew", that's a variation of limerick where the first line contains the name of someone, famous or infamous, and consists of only 4 lines; the 1st & 2nd lines rhyme and the 3rd & 4th lines rhyme.

    "Young Henry Frankenstein
      Unkind Fate did undermine.
      Was totally out of luck
      When the Monster ran amok."

     Think "Burma Shave" slogans and you can't go wrong.

      "Meek"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2008, 12:49:27 AM
Whilst played the WEDDING MARCH,
The new-born BRIDE, with extra starch,
Didst, toward DR. PRETORIUS, stride - 
He, madly, cried, without regret,:
"Why, there's life in the olde girl, yet!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2008, 01:11:18 AM
In Honour of CLASSIC MONSTERDOM'S Literary connection:
````````````````````````````````````````````
WALPURGIS-NACHT proved, in DRACULA's Castle,
For JONATHAN HARKER, to be a real hassle.
THE COUNT, for MINA, got "The Hots",
So, he led her, to his Carfax lair, to "wrassle",
But, Van HELSING staked him, so, now, DRAC rots!

```````````````````````````````````````
... HAPPY WALPURGIS NIGHT!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2008, 11:07:49 AM
MEEK sneezed:"A-Clerihew"! ... GESUNDHEIT!!!
Sorry! Hope I didn't cause you a serious fright!
'Tis the sound, that I make, whene'er I take,
A nose-full, of Pepper,  but, then, like a leper,
My nose goes a-flyin', quite out of sight!
```````````````````````````````
Dearest MEEK,
... I "HEW", to help you "CLERI"-FY,
with this aulde reprise, I prize:

Want the thing
That's all the rage?
Then get yourself
A BURMA SHAVE!
``````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 02, 2008, 12:00:40 AM
The Phantom hid, the Vampire prowled
The Monster groaned, the Wolf Man howled
The Late Night Shows played them Friday Night
Made my childhood such delight
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 06, 2008, 01:37:19 AM
Uh-Oh! Dear FANG-MILY...
Another LIMERICK!
````````````````````````````````````
There is a MONSTER-OUS GENT, named FORRY,
Who begat the latter-day MONSTERS' Story,
I shan't, even, hint, at, nor, mention,
What he does, at Horror/Sci-Fi Conventions,
Since his singing is, not, at all, GORY!
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 06, 2008, 05:35:43 PM
Oh my, have you heard?

Frankenstein went in to a hattery,
put his fist through the window - t'was shattery!
When the cops asked why,
said "My electrodes are dry
and I'd like to charged with battery!"

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 06, 2008, 06:48:24 PM


   "Fritz had quite a few 'bewares'
    Like trying hard not to fall down the stairs.
    But the wonky steps were steep
    Where he tripped over his feet
    And now Fritz is in the shop for repairs."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 06, 2008, 11:51:09 PM
MEEK, PACKY, &, IVAN,
... {Which is better than a Meat-Packing Eye-Van!}
... Your work is like alcohol to an alcoholic;
like song to a bird;
like... a smudge on my best shirt! Darnit! How did that get there?!
... Oh, sorry... like a Monster to the UMA!
Anyway you catch my drift;
... If Limericks be the Food of Love, then... brain-death is imminent!
WRITE ON!... Is that how we used to spell that slogan back in the '60's?! It doesn't look rite!
MOOR, sune!
BARREN TIE-MOTH-EH,YOUSE!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 07, 2008, 10:48:14 AM
(no more early morning bloody marys)

Dracula once woke up screamin
his skin burnt as though by a demon!
Then felt such a fool
realized he was cool
in his coffin and only day dreamin
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 07, 2008, 11:12:01 AM
Dear PACKY: BRAVO! DRAC'S "Future's so bright, he gotta wear shades!"
... and super-uva/uvb suntan lotion!
```````````````````````````````
YGOR got his "nose, out-of-joint",
For, "They hanged me", in violent force;
So, he persuaded THE MONSTER,
To divide and conquer,
But, his victims sure got the point!
```````````````````````````````
NEEEXXXTTT!!!
BARON Von LIMERICKSTEIN
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 07, 2008, 11:30:58 AM
Baron you are per...I mean IN - spiring!

A certain young Baron - no ruffian,
ate an entire buffet, even muffin!
When asked "What the heck?"
Said "What did you expect?
They don't call me Wolfman for nothin'!"

Bone Appetit!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 07, 2008, 05:50:08 PM

   Working in Dr. Pretorious' lab
   Karl found to be sometimes rather drab.
   But he often supplied
   Spare parts on the side,
   Being adept at the ol' "slash & stab".
   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 07, 2008, 06:43:46 PM

   "The Black Lagoon's Creature was no fool,
     But young lasses bathing made him a'drool.
     When ladies were out for a swim
     The Creature would then jump right in
     And invite them to come join his gene pool."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on May 07, 2008, 09:38:52 PM
There once was a girl named Irene
Whose hair was a bright shade of green
when asked how she dyed it, she simply confided
I just use the juice from my spleen!
 

*
  Quoted from the song "Igor" by John Zacherle, 1958
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 08, 2008, 01:19:44 AM
Br'er PACKY PAUL:
... You were correct, the first time! However, 'tis no sweat, off, of my nose... er, snout!
 One, of the few places, where I do not perspire!
... Thanks, MEEK, and, GASPORT, for your continuance of this immoral.. er, immortal thread; a veritable umbilicus, to the Pit... unless it meets a Pendulum! And, no pit-hy remarks, out of you, MEEK!
````````````````````````````
There once was a girl, named MEEK,
Who was, terribly, full, of "cheek",
She would, easily, speak her mind,
Aggressively, like FRANKENSTEIN,
Especially, when taking a leek*!

``````````````````````````
{*You know, those Onions, of which we English are so very fond! Get your bloomin' minds out o' the gutter!}
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 08, 2008, 09:37:01 AM
I think I've heard about that layer absconder! (The tale of the nom de plume 'n Sacre Bloom'n !)

As an artist she's Meek but a killer,
can crack us up like Phyllis Diller.
Her relatives kin ta
somebody named Linda,
en Francais she's known as Elle Miller

(as in "L" Miller of course mes amis)



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 08, 2008, 09:45:42 AM
This limmerick thread demonstrates much style
That the UMA poets have possessed for a while
Just when it looks like we're slowing
Packy, Meek, Gasport, and the Baron keep showing
Why when I read this thread I can't help but smile!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 08, 2008, 10:50:11 AM

   Such doggerel. Methinks the Herr Baron needs a rhyming dictionary.


    "Meek"(the things one hears when hasn't got a gun)


       
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 08, 2008, 07:21:48 PM

   Consider the plight of Jack Griffin
   Who vanished from some liquid he'd sniffin'.
   Flora's friends all did say
   In the nicest of way,
   "We really don't know what you see in him."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on May 08, 2008, 11:34:37 PM
A Werewolf once tore his own hide
To find out just what was inside
He ripped and he tore 'till his hands ran with gore
But before he found out... he died.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 09, 2008, 12:31:20 AM
Meek  spaketh: Such doggerel. Methinks the Herr Baron needs a rhyming dictionary.
"Meek" (they thinks one hearse; henna snot guts a pun)
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dearest MEEK
... Better, than, mere doggerel - WOLF-FERAL; which is better, than, say... WOLF-OFFAL!
SCAT! I Say! SCAT! Get Away!
```````````````````````````````
BR'ER PACKY,
... Qui, Qui, MONSTEUR! Of course, your mess is amiss!
```````````````````````````````
BR'ER IVAN,
... U may-cuss-mile 2!
```````````````````````````````
BR'ER GASPORT,
... ANY OLDE GAS-PORT IN A STORM... Even, with the PRICE, of GAS, these day, VINCENT! I'm glad you said, "his hands ran with gore"; if you'd said, "his Paw ran with GORE", that would make BILL & HILLARY my parents! Talk about THE CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF!
`````````````````````````
The OOTMAH of The OFFAL OFFICE!
BARON Von WOLFSTINK!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 09, 2008, 08:34:38 AM
The Wolfman was feeling forlorn, he
had a sore on his foot and no corn-He
was getting frustrated,
his paw perforated
for the way that he walked was so thorny!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 09, 2008, 08:48:08 AM
Mommy make it stop!

A groan escaped from the hearse.
Retching sounds and then a curse.
"It's enough to make my liver-sick,
this constant barrage of limerick -
As poetry there's just nothing verse!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 09, 2008, 02:27:42 PM
Things on Skull Island weren't right.
A Dentist was flown in one night.
Kong ate the whole jet
guess that's what you get
for trying to adjust the King's bite
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on May 09, 2008, 10:33:12 PM
Frankenstein noticed, alas
he had testicles made out of brass
He banged them together to play "Stormy Weather"
and lightening shot out of his ass.


Did i mention I'm actually related to Walt Whitman?...That's him you hear spinning in his grave.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 10, 2008, 12:11:04 AM
Gasport writ:
Did i mention I'm actually related to Walt Whitman?...That's him you hear spinning in his grave.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear GASPOT... er, GASPORT,
... Smoking THE LEAVES OF GRASS, again, are we?!
The yarns, which I hear olde WALT spinning, in his grave, must be pure hemp! Ex-HEMP-lary!
Now, PACKY PAUL is prolific, specific, and, even, soporific, yet, delectably, non-sophomoric!
... Alas, Poor Yorick!
```````````````````````````````````
The UMA is blessed, with odd minds,
Letting Limericks, fly, unconfined,
I harbour, not, the least shred, of doubt
that, there's madness about,
which we caught, from olde Doc Frankenstein!
````````````````````````````````````

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 10, 2008, 09:46:16 AM

  "The way coupling of words can misbehave
    Often cause poets to turn over in their grave.
    Shelley and Byron,
    Were out loud a-cryin'
    And Whitman spun 'round like a lathe."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 11, 2008, 02:29:14 AM
When Bela's full moon curse ascended
he went out and killed a young peasant
He ripped her heart from her chest,
wrote on it "I LOVE YOU BEST!"
to give Maleva for a Mother's Day present

PS: Happy Mother's Day to all you UMA moms out there!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 11, 2008, 10:35:08 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
```````````````````
Rememb'ring our MOMS is quite nice, I think!
We know, of One, tho', both, deadly & fright'ning,
Whose MONSTER SON, killed, just, for the sport!
YGOR, his best friend, voiced an insight, so right;
He exclaimed, with a JOLT, that: "Your Mother vas LIGHT'NINGK!"
```````````````````````````````````````
... I agree with CRAZY IVAN... doth that make Moi Crazy, too?!
... CRAZY, about our MOMS, GOD Bless Them, all!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 13, 2008, 12:25:15 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... So many limericks; so little time... on my personal calendar... &, too much time, on my hands!
Obviously!
... Am I the Master of Understatement, or, what?! Here's the next teaser to start the Limerick madness brewing a-fresh!

````````````````````````````````````
FULCI'S Italian ZOMBIES are evil & mean;
Aside, from their being rotted & green;
They'll devour your entrails, like spaghetti;
Feast, on your brains; &, before you're ready;
They'll make mince-meat out of your spleen!
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON Von WOLFSTEIN & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 13, 2008, 09:53:03 AM
As usual - I'm late for Mother's Day!  But persevere I do, yes Ma(s)ter. You see...

I don't have to "remember" my Mom
For I think about her all the year long.
Though in 83 she bought hers,
I still see her in my daughters.
www.I miss you dot com!
love packy

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 13, 2008, 10:35:05 AM

   Were you aware that May 12th was "National Limerick Day"? Neither did I until I was watching "The Tonight Show":


    Last night Jay Leno did say
    May 12th was National Limerick Day.
    I thought "What is this?"
    How could I've been so remiss?
    But Limericks do thrive in the UMA.


   A cannibal rather chummy
   With a 2nds in his tummy,
   Suddenly began to frown
   From that last slice of clown
   Declaring "Coo, that didn't taste half funny.
   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 13, 2008, 11:03:24 AM
When The Creature's Mom was a young-dish,
she and her hubby had but one-wish
to open a diner
and it couldna been finer -
til somebody ordered the Lungfish!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 13, 2008, 07:22:41 PM
Waldemar Daninksy drove out to the lake
to find the cause of his new tummy ache
His reflection didn't quibble;
he'd gotten round in the middle
Seems he's too old to keep eating Cheesecake.
Title: Spider Baby lyrics
Post by: Crazy1van on May 13, 2008, 08:21:40 PM
In honor(?) of yesterday's National Limmerick Day, I'm posting all four stanzas of Fantomas' SPIDER BABY theme song.  They don't follow exact limmerick rules, but they 'feel' right.

Screams and moans and bats and bones
Teenage monsters in haunted homes
The ghosts on the stair
The vampires bite
Better beware, there's a full moon tonight

Cannibal spiders creep and crawl
Boys and ghouls having a ball
Frankenstein, Dracula and even the Mummy
Are sure to end up in someone's tummy

Take a fresh rodent, some toadstools and weeds
And an old owl and the young one she breeds
Mix in seven legs of an eight-legged beast
Then you are all set for a cannibal feast

Sit around the fire with the cup of brew
A fiend and a werewolf on each side of you
This cannibal orgy is strange to behold
And the maddest story ever told
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: neonnoodle on May 13, 2008, 09:35:39 PM
Oh, I love that Spider Baby song.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 14, 2008, 12:49:21 AM
DEAR UMA FANG-MILY,
... WOWSERS! &, Hubba Hubba ! Youse Guys {& MEEK} are LIMERICK FREAKS!
Nor, was I aware, of NATIONAL LIMERICK DAY, when I posted, yesterday! I wrote it on the 12th, but, posted it, in the wee small hours, o' the 13th.... even, as I write this, at 1:47 A.M., on the 14th.
````````````````````````````````````````
THE WOLF MAN, in the moon-lit forest, howls,
Loping, through fog-shrouded woods, he prowls,
Leaping, upon his victim, with snarls & growls,
In blood-thirsty violence, he disembowels,
So scary, that, even, the owls, throw in the towel!
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 14, 2008, 07:39:47 AM
While Dracula enjoys walks in the moonlight
He really loves the Creatures of the Night
The music they make
Pierced his heart like a stake
Which in retrospect wasn't too bright!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 14, 2008, 11:02:57 AM
Dear Brother, IVAN,
... This paean hath been writ, to immortalize Thy lugubrious contributions, by which we, all, are, oddly, awed! 

``````````````````````````````````
CRAZY IVAN, we must agree, is, aptly, named,
For his sense, of verse, is, provocatively, maimed;
Yet, his pow'r, of reason, is, not, completely, blown,
As he rescues his thread, of logic, with admirable mien,
Redeeming the skewed, by leaving no turn, unstoned.
```````````````````````````````````````````
Your infectionate, er, affectionate, WEREWOLF UNCLE,
BARON "Do You See What You've Done, You Shameless Mad-man?! You've Made Me Cry 'WOLF' & 'UNCLE' In The Same Sentence!"... And, as the final Topper, you've gotten me,  so rattled, that, I've forgotten my last name! NOW, WHO'S THE CRAZY ONE, EH?!?!?!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 14, 2008, 11:21:31 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... In antipasto... er, anticipation, of FATHER'S DAY, I've penned this li'l number, of how our children can succeed our every hope, but, still, fall prey, to the same mistakes, that we did:
```````````````````````````````````````
DRACULA'S Daughter, really, burned The Olde Man;
She, never, looked back, for, she had a plan;
Believing, that, she could become human, again,
Eschewing blood, for wine, and, a boyfriend,
'Til SANDOR, a vengeful Cupid, brought her 'life', to an end!
```````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
COUNT "BIG DADDY" Von DRACULA, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 15, 2008, 03:15:12 AM
Tony the Teenage Werewolf was full of aggression
His transformation was brought on by a doctor's injection
Every time a bell would ring
Another of his friends would get their wings
He made the highway to Heaven a traffic congestion
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 15, 2008, 04:12:35 AM
Timotheus von Wolfstein was once OOTMAH elected
And for fleas he's oft had to be inspected
But due to his status as limmerick poet,
he rose in rank; now the Baron must show it
Within the UMA he's now the GENERAL ECCLECTIC!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 15, 2008, 11:38:25 AM
Dear BROTHER, IVAN,
... Thanks for the Up-Grade, in Rank! Allow Moi, to reciprocate:
```````````````````````````````````````
GENERAL ECLECTIC, wrote, to THE SALTY SEA-DOG,
In The UNI-MONSTER-NAVY, to Laud, not, to Flog;
"I'll promote you, IVAN, to a STAR-SHIP Command,
Not, your usual ship; wherein, you'll file STAR-LOGS;
And, mayhap, write BLOGS; but, Water-Logged?! Never, again!"
```````````````````````````````````````
Set Phaser on "Stun"!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, The ROOTIN', TOOTIN', SURE-SHOOTIN', UMA-OOTMAH! B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 15, 2008, 03:56:36 PM
But with Ivan there's one more factor
went nuts on Uhuru and hacked her!
Then he tried to play dead
but went crazy instead -
Good Lord Tim, he's a poet not an actor!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 16, 2008, 04:45:59 AM
It's life, Tim, but not as we know it.
In space no one screams like a poet.
The starship I commandeered to Saturn
I was surprised Spock didn't see the pattern
With 60 moons here I may never leave orbit!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 16, 2008, 11:45:11 PM
packy writ, brilliantly:
````````````````````
But with Ivan there's one more factor
went nuts on Uhuru and hacked her!
Then he tried to play dead
but went crazy instead -
Good Lord Tim, he's a poet not an actor!
````````````````````````
... Make No BONES About It! Br'er PACKY, a  most clever thread development!
``````````````````````
As CRAZY IVAN writ, in self-defense, inspired, by PACKY PAUL'S STAR TREK Analogy:
`````````````````````````````
It's life, Tim, but not as we know it.
In space no one screams like a poet.
The starship I commandeered to Saturn
I was surprised Spock didn't see the pattern
With 60 moons here I may never leave orbit!
``````````````````````````````````
So, your obit will be an orbit, ad perpetuam?
``````````````````````````````````
Dear IVAN, crazy, like a {20th CENTURY} FOX,
found it, PARAMOUNT, to conceal his motives, heinous,
with 60 moons, upon which, to collect moon-rocks,
He might shock SPOCK, with logic unlocked,
By missing SATURN'S RINGS, but, not, URANUS!

... I feel, as, if, I've just birthed a GALAXY! Ouch! Asteroids, to prove it!
CAPTAIN QUIRK Von SPOCKENSTEIN, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 17, 2008, 11:02:39 PM

So, your obit will be an orbit, ad perpetuam?
``````````````````````````````````

Nay my good Baron, an obit won't be needed
Not when this planet is so well moon-seeded
One of the perks of lycanthropy
is to possess the 'curse' of immortality
So my natural death is defeated

``````````````````````````````````
Dear IVAN, crazy, like a {20th CENTURY} FOX,
found it, PARAMOUNT, to conceal his motives, heinous,
with 60 moons, upon which, to collect moon-rocks,
He might shock SPOCK, with logic unlocked,
By missing SATURN'S RINGS, but, not, URANUS!

... I feel, as, if, I've just birthed a GALAXY! Ouch! Asteroids, to prove it!
CAPTAIN QUIRK Von SPOCKENSTEIN, B.G.G.

Circling Uranus was never my destination
getting lost in a black hole is not my intention
But the starship I lean on
must ever hunt KlingOns
Seems Fate's dealt me one morehumiliation
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 18, 2008, 06:47:15 AM
The Black Hole we had better ignore,
where certainly no man has gone before
emitting death fogs
and toxic Captain's logs
that get shat-ner the his and hers door

****Yes friends somehow it always comes back to this****


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 18, 2008, 04:56:34 PM
Dear PACKY & IVAN,
... Mea Culpa, for my leading you ass-tray!
... Hmmm, Ass-Tray, isn't that where you crush your butts?!
... So, ignoring the verbal affront, to our back-sides,
 let's progress, back, to the front-sides,
above the navel, by delving, into our Monster Kid insides,
of Mind, Heart & Spirit!
`````````````````````````````````
IM-HOTEP, IMHO, was cursed, to fulfill,
His unholy love, denied; 'til, risen, to kill,
Any 'infidel', who defiled the old gods' will,
Avenging their wrath, wrought, by the SCROLL OF THOTH;
'Til ISIS protected her Priestess, &... ARDETH BEY, double-crossed!
``````````````````````````````````
... Ain't Love grand?!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.,
Who once met GENE RODDENBERRY, I was, in full SPOCK Make-up!
Spent a lovely half-hour with him, I did! May he Rest In Peace, EVERNOW!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: movie monster con on May 19, 2008, 06:46:49 AM
WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead  ę 1 2 ... 6 7 Ľ
packy120353       99      1464
`````````````````````````````````````````
Imagineered, by PACKY PAUL, we've, all, "toed the line",
With Limericks, about Mummies, or, our Beloved Frankenstein,
Dracula & vampires; from Zombies, to Star Trek,
Wolfmen, too; and... Hey! What the Heck?!
'Tho' I've grabbed the one hundredth spot, we're, still, neck & neck!
```````````````````````````````````
FANGS, A MILLION!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOOODDD, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 19, 2008, 07:03:44 AM
WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead  ę 1 2 ... 6 7 Ľ
packy120353       99      1464
`````````````````````````````````````````
Imagineered, by PACKY PAUL, we've, all, "toed the line",
With Limericks, about Mummies, or, our Beloved Frankenstein,
Dracula & vampires; from Zombies, to Star Trek,
Wolfmen, too; and... Hey! What the Heck?!
'Tho' I've grabbed the one hundredth spot, we're, still, neck & neck!
```````````````````````````````````
FANGS, A MILLION!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOOODDD, B.G.G.

`````````````````````````````````
No doubt, that BILL could spin off verse, of limerick persuasion,
Yet, he slept through this last posting, the 1-hundredth occasion,
I'd forgot, to log him, out, and, myself, to log, in,
I just want you, all, to know the facts, lest confusion set in.
So, this confession becomes # 101, I 'opes, t'ain't no sin...
```````````````````````````````````
... SPOTTY, AS A 101st DALMATION, 'e is!
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, Of Which, BILL MILLHORN, is, One, of the Best, B.G.G..
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 19, 2008, 11:44:48 AM
All this talk about three-digit posting
is starting to sound like UMA boasting
I remember the Monster and I feel
we should all gather round at the windmill
For it is he we should be roasting!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 19, 2008, 03:58:28 PM

A scent invites through Lagoon brine -
His scales off Rita sweetly shine.
He breaks the locks
and grabs the box!
Tonight on Pizza Creature dine!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 19, 2008, 04:26:57 PM
Erik the Phantom was growing quite bored
The Opera largely was being ignored
He took a cab to the coast
the beach now had to play host
To the Phantom of the Boogie Board
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 19, 2008, 05:39:50 PM
A monstrously limerick fest
is not something we should take in jest.
I hope someday we meet
maybe even to eat
and our wry sense of humor digest!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 19, 2008, 11:25:50 PM
Limericks have proven, themselves, an addictive strain;
Counted, by some, as loss, &, coveted, by some, as gain.
Yet, to cease their cycle, now, I'd soon as feign,
Some saner way, to re-wire, and, re-boot, my brain;
Time, mis-spent, upon rhyming slime, vouch-safes, us, as, quite, insane!
`````````````````````````````````
"Hear; Hear! There, There, and, Everywhere, Everywerewolf!" THE BEATLES

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 20, 2008, 09:27:03 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
Apparently, I've been moved up, in Rank,
From posting these li'l germs,.. er, GEMS,
Which release, upon you, their fragrant "Stank",
I didn't start them; NO! You have PACKY, to Thank;
Let's use our Medals, of Valour, upon him, to SPANK!
````````````````````````````````
"WARNING:" the sternly issued headline read,
Reader, beware! "Irish Limericks Ahead"!
This madness, upon our dear Monster Army, foisted,
Has died many silent deaths, only, to be re-voiced,
Infecting, to date, 1532, who, having read them, rejoiced!
`````````````````````````````````
As RED SKELTON said: "G'-Bye, fer now, &, May GOD Bless!"
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 20, 2008, 10:32:41 AM
The Irish Limerick sang of spud,
I will take blame for that green crud.
But when it died
All jokes aside,
twas MEEK who squeezed that turnip's blood!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on May 20, 2008, 01:36:23 PM

  "For me 'tis all the same
   Upon my shoulders to heap the blame.
   But showing no remorse
   In beating a dead horse,
   There's another far worse I shan't name."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on May 20, 2008, 02:30:23 PM
Thanks to Tim Ivan and Meek,
old friends are gone, my family weak.
I hear it all
day "Stop it Paul!"
I've forgotten how to normal speak!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 20, 2008, 03:53:19 PM
We all must bear blame it is true
But really what else can we do?
I can think of much worse
than a limmerick verse
As long as we don't make them blue.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 21, 2008, 12:32:03 AM
You ask, yourself: "How long can this go on?!"
"How much, more, can we, humanly, take,
of this undying Limerick thread, so very wrooong?!"
These rhymes, bizarre; from wits, half-baked,
which were writ, to Honour, unfaked, BELA, BORIS & LON?!
```````````````````````````````````
To write, this madness is, kind, of, like, eating pistachios;
For, once, you've started, you're hooked; you cannot stop!
If you've just read, these latest offerings, aficionados,
Then, you're, certifiably, nuts! We'll call the cops!
Need a cop-out, to make this end? How about: "Aw, yer fadder's mustachio!".
`````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 22, 2008, 11:13:20 AM
There once was a group about Movies
That thought Classic Horror was groovy
They stayed online all night
thinking of new lines to write
At least they weren't surfing for Boobies!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 23, 2008, 12:27:52 AM
KING KONG went ape, when he saw her,
MISS DARROW, who crossed many waters,
She was his love-toy,
He was her lover-boy,
Yet, when he came to New York, he was slaughtered.
````````````````````````````````````
... he should have gone surfing instead... as IVAN said!
G'Night! 1:30 A.M.
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 23, 2008, 08:46:13 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
````````````````````````````````
"But showing no remorse
 In beating a dead horse,
 There's another far worse I shan't name."
````````````````````````````````
... When our Beloved MEEK writ these lines, I wondered of whom she spake, I suspected one of the denizens of CASTLE Von WOLFSTEIN. Certainly, not, little, olde Moi!

... Then, when IVAN writ this:
```````````````````````
"They stayed online all night
thinking of new lines to write
At least they weren't surfing for Boobies!"
````````````````````````````````

... I thought, "Insightfully trenchant!" Then, when this mysterious limerick appeared upon my desk, this morning, and, I saw that it was un-posted, I recognized the hand-writing!
... MEEK'S Culprit, is JOE NOSFERATU, HOMELESS VAMPIRE, who flies in, to use the computer, whilst the rest of us slumber. Much, as I'd love to take credit, for it, I'd rather have cold, hard, CA$H!
```````````````````````````````````
Human women fascinated Sasquatch,
Who, unlike TCFTBL, sought an on-line match,
He declined, tho', to use a photo profile,
Unaware, that his choice, the ladies riled,
He never got to watch a Boobie hatch!
```````````````````````````````
... Ouch! The marriage of Limerick to pun, assures the worst, in verse!
... I feel dirty just reading it!
... Thank Goodness, that, none, of you, others, have ever been guilty of such a heinous crime!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS Von WOLFSTEIN, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 27, 2008, 04:52:55 PM
When returning from a holiday weekend
It's my pulse that I fear may soon weaken
With no more poetry to host
the board received not one new post
Not since Big Foot had chatroom ladies shriekin'!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on May 27, 2008, 09:37:06 PM
Drac was in his coffin sleeping soundly on his back
When mean ol' Doc Van Helsing planned to launch a sneak attack
The sun was slowly rising as he ripped the lid apart...
and drove that wooden stake straight through the Count's undying heart

Because it's true... Even monsters get the blues
We hunt them down with torches, dogs and crucifixes too
It's always open season, and there's nothing you can do.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 28, 2008, 12:56:06 AM
I say, GAS, Olde SPORT,
... Your plaintive ode really brings an eye to my tear!
``````````````````````````````````
DRACULA & RENFIELD, were in his room,
We saw the sky, above, aglow, with gloom,
His wives, disguised, flying wild & free,
Winged rats, from the Tomb,
Or, worse: BATS, IN THE BELFRY!
`````````````````````````````
NECK-TS!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 28, 2008, 01:01:14 AM
Dear IVAN! Welcome back!
``````````````````````````
There are few things, better, than,
A new limerick, posted, by IVAN.
He makes me smile,
At his lack, of guile,
'Til I'm mistaken for a crocodile!
```````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 30, 2008, 01:02:10 PM
The Baron's smile can be gruesome
if he's just had a platter of gruel; some
of his meals were once tourists
till Tim's appetite flourished
And I fear, that of his victims, I knew some!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 30, 2008, 10:13:48 PM
Dear IVAN,
... More, for me, to treasure! Seems, like, we are the only stalwarts, left, to engage, in this TIM-FOOLERY!
... PACKY & MEEK, 'tho', not, IRISH, contributed mightily, and, come next March 17th, may, once again, do so. 'Til then, we must fart the good fart, since, our combined genius is a real GAS! Like admitting to flatulence, few, there are, of such bravery, yet, all, can identify, with this entirely corporeal trait... 1,793 people have viewed this madness, compared to the 10 or so, who have, repeatedly, released these toxic li'l bombs!
...  As a variation, on a theme, here's tonight's offering:
``````````````````````````````````
What's eating The BARON... A Clown?!
No, I believe, 'tis the other way 'round;
He made TIM belly-laugh,
Yet, TIM bit him, in half,
Turning his greasepaint grin, up-side down!
```````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 01, 2008, 11:50:46 AM
Gasport seems hooked on vampire bashing
As he speaks of Dracula's heart smashing
but I know deep inside
he views the monsters with pride
Why else would he be here monster mashing?

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on June 01, 2008, 03:46:53 PM
Frankenstein confided that his bride had gone astray
She left him for the Wolfman and is moving out today
He'd kill himself right now, if not for one important fact...
Each time he ends his life some evil doctor brings him back!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 01, 2008, 08:29:40 PM
Dear GASPORT & IVAN,
... Capital, Lads, Capital! Fine exchanges!
... This is an ode, to ELENA VERDUGO, set, to appear, at the CLASSIC MOVIE MONSTER CON, this October:
`````````````````````
ILONKA, that Gypsy Girl, so fine,
Fell, for THE WOLF MAN, ill-timed,
She gave him a silver bullet, of note,
'Ere, he tore out her throat,
They, both, died, in THE HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN!
```````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on June 01, 2008, 10:34:29 PM
 For Ben [ i miss you] Chapman, the REEL GILLMAN:


  I ran into the Creature at a restaurant yesterday
  He said he had a craving for a tender fish fillet
  A waiter soon harpooned him, and dragged him out of sight
  Then added Gillman Chowder to the menu for the night.

 Because it's true, even monsters get the blues...
 Their mates can be unfaithful, friends can be so cruel
 You better mind your manners or they might come after you.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 04, 2008, 11:24:31 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... I regret, to inform you, that, here... is  another LIMERICK!!!
```````````````````````````````````````
Another Limerick, you say?! HORRENDOUS!
Such, an evil omen, as this, PORTENTOUS!
We thought they were dead,
Now, with this new one, read;
From Ghoulies & Ghosties & Limericks DEFEND US!
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
THERE ONCE WAS A BARON FROM NANTUCKET...
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 05, 2008, 11:38:24 AM
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
THERE ONCE WAS A BARON FROM NANTUCKET...
Whose dictionary was a bucket
He'd fill it with puns
and then choose the worst ones
And he shares them with us, how unluck.. it.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: movie monster con on June 06, 2008, 10:13:21 AM
Awww, Thankee, M'Lad, I'm touched!
... which explains my perpetual stay, in the UMA rubber room!
```````````````````````````````````````````
That SALTY SEA-DOG, IVAN, so CRAZY,
His CORN was truly a-MAIZE-ing;
He'd shuck all his puns,
Then, shoot 'em, from guns,
A CEREAL KILLER, swimming, in WACKY & WAVY GRAVY!
```````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 08, 2008, 06:35:25 AM
Right back atcha, Baron!

My secret life as a cerial killer; I'll share it.
I offed Yummy Mummy and took his wrap; now I wear it.
I killed Lucky the Leprechaun, how bold;
a shame he had no pot o' gold.
But I heard that our Meek will inherit.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2008, 08:26:45 AM
IVAN'S LUCKY CHARMS: {Jingle}"THEY'RE FIENDISHLY DELICIOUS!" &, IRISH-THEMED, at that!
... May you be FRANKEN-BERRIED ALIVE!
... "Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! BERRIED ALIVE; BERRIED ALIVE!" Sang BERRY GIBB, o' THE BEE-GEES!
 
```````````````````````````````````
So, MEEK shall inherit the earth;
After Humankind's demise, what's it worth?
Amid the books, of her library,
The most precious one's buried,
THE SCROLL OF THOTH, the Curse, to reverse!
```````````````````````````````````

... Wowsers, that one spilled, out, so rapidly, that, it, even, scared me!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on June 08, 2008, 09:07:14 AM

     What need have I of the Earth?
     When my finances are really quite dearth.
     It is generally felt,
     That Meek never needs any Gelt,
     Since my treasure is my keen sense of mirth.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 08, 2008, 12:20:52 PM
IVAN'S LUCKY CHARMS: {Jingle}"THEY'RE FIENDISHLY DELICIOUS!" &, IRISH-THEMED, at that!
... May you be FRANKEN-BERRIED ALIVE!
... "Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! BERRIED ALIVE; BERRIED ALIVE!" Sang BERRY GIBB, o' THE BEE-GEES!
 
```````````````````````````````````
And here I thought Burried Glibb sang "BARELY ALIVE" after suffering from a Saturnian Daylight Fever.

```````````````````````````````````

I know its for all that I speak
When I say the Earth has inherited Meek.
We're so lucky in the UMA to have her
She's like potpourri stuffed in a cadaver;
Without her these forums would reek!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2008, 08:42:47 PM
LIMERICK POTPOURRI
------------------------
I draw MEEK, out, with wit & repartee,
Yet, she's indispensable, to the UMA!
Yea, our MEEK is Queen;
A real {volatile} Human Bean,
Exuding Laughing Gas, whenever, we play!
`````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 11, 2008, 10:40:06 AM
Universal's theme parks are now fishin'
for a musical monster, so they're wishin'
that the Creature will just sing along
when they teach him their funky fresh songs.
This may work but I don't share their vision.   ???
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on June 11, 2008, 04:24:03 PM

   The rain never seems to slack,
   As Nature gives Iowa a whack.
   The whole state is soggy,
   My backyard is so boggy.
   And Meek is web-footed now and quacks.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: movie monster con on June 11, 2008, 10:38:00 PM
Dearest MEEK,
... Not, so bad, as all that....
```````````````````````````````````
Our Meek is web-footed, now, and, quacks,
Which saves her, from vampires named DRAC,
'Tho', alas, down, on her luck,
Our lass, now, resembles a duck,
But, can become a spokes-critter, for AFLAC!
````````````````````````````````````
Your Kissin' Cuzin Kith & Kin,
COUNT DUCKULA!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 13, 2008, 10:29:25 PM
MONSTER BASH 2008 is arriving, soon;
For MONSTER KIDS, a yearly boon,
Who fit the Genre, Hand-In-Glove;
Enjoying 3 days, of MONSTER LOVE,
Remembering VINCENT, during the Full Moon!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 17, 2008, 10:06:39 AM
There once was an Artist, named STAN,
Whose special fx & make-up works were grand,
Despite subject matter quite odd,
I believe, he lives, Now, in GOD,
While his work continues to amaze millions of Fans!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 18, 2008, 09:43:31 AM
THE BALLAD OF THE BLIND DATE OF COFFIN JOE...
------------------------------------------------------
... In LIMERICK DISGUISE! ;^}
`````````````````````````````````````````
A DATE... BLIND? Why, of course, 'tis so,
All dates are sightless, so far as I know,
Were COFFIN JOE Irish & Wise,
He'd date a Veggie {no big surprise},
This Veggie would see him; since POTATOES have EYES!
`````````````````````````````````````````
"Have a Po-Tat-O!"
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY O'SHAUGHNESSY, LEPRECHAWN
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on June 18, 2008, 04:09:37 PM
Oh my goodness for Ray and his brood!
Every angle it seemed was snafud.
He considered his option
decided failure was not-one,
And instead used intestinal fortitude!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: CreepyJeff on June 18, 2008, 07:11:07 PM
There was a UMAer named Packy
Who traveled up north for some snacky
As he cleared his head
from his thoughts of dread
to the UMA he's come backy

(Welcome back, brother!)
Creepy Jeff
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 20, 2008, 05:00:05 PM
It seemed for a while that we ran out of poems
But the Universal Monster Army's kept the limmericks flowin'
It's Tim, Meek, Jeff and Packy
That make this thread so wacky
I think I just wrote one myself, without knowin'.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 23, 2008, 11:03:55 AM
THE MONSTER BASH, again, came & went.
THE UMA supplied good graces, without stint;
Lending our collective Presence, strong,
How could things, there, e'er go wrong?!
The UMA/BASH imprint, I must say, was truly MINT!
``````````````````````````````````
... Ahhh, 'twas grand to see Thee, one & all, and, to place a new face, or, two, to appropriate, names, herein.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
A very Happy Carin' BARON, TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: movie monster con on June 26, 2008, 12:32:18 AM
The next Convention is WONDERFEST,
As this summer reaches its crest,
Which began with MONSTER BASH,
And it caught on in a flash,
That October will yield One of the BEST!
```````````````````````````````
... Hope to be at WONDER FEST... and, a few other Conventions, this year! ;^}
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 28, 2008, 06:17:08 AM
I'm amazed, at how, summer is flying,
Time melts, away, without, even, trying,
'Twill soon be July,
And, in a flying pig's eye,
If I said I was caught up, I'd be lying!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 29, 2008, 09:11:48 AM
              THE VICE O' VERSA!
             ----------------------
'Tis obvious, I've got too much time, on my hands;
Writing these limericks, suck, like, quicksand,
Although, quite annoying,
And, oft, too sweetly cloying,
'Tis, you, who are daft, as they've never been banned!

The demands, on my every hour, blows my mind,
By the clamouring, of others, sans reason or rhyme;
There's jobs and conventions,
Too many things, to mention...
... I've got too many hands, on my time!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on July 01, 2008, 07:06:01 PM

  "Its commonly known that I've
   Got a keen interest in Colin Clive.
   Some are of the opine
   That I've got a small shrine,
   Where you can almost hear him shout "IT'S ALIVE!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 06, 2008, 08:16:39 AM
July's sunshine is summertime's gift,
it beauty, always, gives me a lift,
and, speaking, of beauty,
I, always, do my duty,
on THE 4th, by consuming a fifth!
```````````````````````````````````
A TOAST: BELA-TED HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!
... May GOD BLESS our Service-Men & Women!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 09, 2008, 08:42:44 PM
Aah I'm Irish to be sure but truth be told
I've never been told that I'm quite old
but me teeth go to bed with their gold
and me soul has never been sold
then I look forward to the wifes scold
or it's out in the nights cold
as I've never been that bold.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 10, 2008, 07:37:08 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Thankee, m'Lad, for your add! Our madness relies upon that o' brave souls, such as yerself!
... Inspired, more, by making rhyming light, than, actual experience, of said plight, I hopes!
``````````````````````````````````
Yer wife's scold places you in the land o' IRE,
No EIRE you'll be knowin', burnin' on that pyre,
'Til ye extinguish that fire,
'Tis a joy we married blokes acquire,
Dear Lad, here, you're singin' to the choir!

``````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY & FANG-MILY, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 10, 2008, 10:09:40 PM
Thank ye Tim, here be another.

Of Irish descent our werewolf Tim be,
Bark at the moon said he,
yet on St Pat's day you'll agree,
he changed from brown fur to green for all to see,
Which left him to roam quite free,
In the beautiful land of Innisfree.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 11, 2008, 03:18:03 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... 'Tis only for the rhyme, that, this one was born!
Hope you get a laugh, out of it, or, else, be RIP TORN!
Not meanin', to be obscenin', about XENA...
``````````````````````````````````````````````

Our MAURICE be Irish: ERIN GO BRAUGH-LESS,
Lets it all hang out & really quite flawless,
His candor, via Condor,
Doth Daze us, with Wonder,
When, as WONDER WOMAN, dis-guy-sed, as LUCY LAWLESS!

``````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 11, 2008, 03:38:01 PM
A BRAUGH-LESS Xena now that is a thought, oh I've went all a tizzy.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 11, 2008, 03:47:29 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Muchly, I enjoyed your above witty verse;
I may have tak'n it, tho', from bad to worse;
A mood ov'rtook me; I hope, not, a Curse;
Nor, my rhyme, so much slime, unrehearsed,
Shall quench your sterling Limerick thirst!

... Here, then, is my variation, on your theme -  ;^} ...

Oh, I wish our werewolf Tim descented  be,
The Bark, from his moon, spreadeth much glee, {Laughing gas, silly}
Yet, on St. Bat's-night, you'll agree,
He exchanged his brown fur, for Green Beer {the better to pee},
WICH led him, to Rome, oh, so quietly,
That beautiful land, where his GUINNESS is free!

An A Right Proper MOTLEY FOOLE, I Be!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY O'SHAUGHNESSY, LEPRECHAWN, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on July 11, 2008, 04:04:31 PM

   Who'da thunk a true son of Eire
   Armed with Biro would suddenly inspire
   A deluge of verse,
   Some good(and some worse)
   From assorted UMA poets most dire.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 11, 2008, 04:07:53 PM
A Warrior Princess with much attitude
Thought to slay monsters while partially nude
But she had to fight tit for tat
And still Hercules knocked her flat
For the god found her demeanor most rude.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 11, 2008, 08:07:39 PM
Here's one dedicated to crazyIvan and Tim and those of a werewolf slant.

Along went the werewolf Tee-hee-toe-hoe,
Until he met his ultimate foe,
With an alarm in his howl as he stubbed his big toe,
That was as far as he could go,
Even with Toe in air to see it grow,
Wolfy knew that it had to be so!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 11, 2008, 08:35:59 PM
Limericks, from MAURICE, shows a most visual bloke;
Of Irish Werewolf habits, as our "tv horror" spoke,
So, GREEN FUR, or, BRAUGH-LESS,
Our XENA'S a bare-naked goddess,
Asking "WHERE?" or, "WERE-", just ain't no joke!

GOD Save The Flying Non-Sequitur!
Non sequitur (humor), a comment that has no relation to the preceding comment or to an ongoing discussion or topic {WIKIPEDIA - full o' oxygenated morons!}
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 11, 2008, 11:07:05 PM
See what you've done Tim you created a poet and you don't know it (I've done it again) here's one more for your collection..


There was a young werewolf named Bow,
Who came in from the quite heavy snow,
 As he had planned to cure his lumbago,
Then he was caught with one mighty throw.
And out in the snow  landed head first in a flow,
With only his dignity left in tow,
Stuck in the snow up to his elbow. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 12, 2008, 09:15:03 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Novel, that, you should invest your poetic Werewolf scenario, in a blizzard. In an Interview, with BURIED.com, I was asked, by THE UNDERTAKER:
... "Have you ever been accused of being a wolf in sheep's clothing?"

... My reply:
..."Hmmmmmmm, well, now that I think back on't; there was that isolated incidence, which I suppose accounts for 'a wolf in sheep's clothing' mis-perception, back in the Winter of AD 1816, in BAVARIA. A terribly harsh winter, as I recall it.
... Sheep's wool-skins enjoyed a brief vogue as a popular style of clothing; warm, woolly, fleecy and comfy... being covered in this white fur, well, I got stuck in a snow-drift during a skiing/avalanche accident, and, no one recognized me, until some 30 years later, during the spring thaw of AD 1847!
... Talk about your chilling tale... mine was frozen so severely that it had to be amputated! To this day, I'm plagued with a near-mortal fear of sheep."
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 12, 2008, 09:50:17 PM
Hello Tim, thank you for the encouragement I can just hear it now "IT'S the wolf it's the wolf!!!! and poor little Lambsey is no more.

From a snow blizzard he came,
And I can assure you he was no dame,
For he was always at the top of his game,
So now he was looking for his old flame,
But she was now married with only him to blame,
what was he to do but stake his claim,
But as it turned out it was his claim to fame,
As he killed the husband and married her all the same,
He still tells the tale to this day even from his frame,
Because now he is alone and quite lame. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 13, 2008, 07:42:17 AM

Dear MAURICE,
... Brother, Thy plaintive poem hath hit ye nail, squarely, upon ye head!
... The sad, :'( true, Tale, of Me... "and, 6 million other guys!" :) ;) :D ;D >:( :( :o 8) ??? ::) :P :-[ :-X :-\ :-* :'(
... My, my! Rather, a stoic, motley, lackadaisical bunch, aren't we?!
... Without further ado: Here's today's offense... er, offering!
````````````````````````````````````
In IRELAND thrives a Monster Man,
Who, named MAURICE, doth understand,
The painful plight, befallin',
The noble WEREWOLF Callin',
An', 'e sums it, up, in poems, GRAND! ;D
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 13, 2008, 08:24:01 AM
Thank you Tim, That reminds me of the ole joke which goes something like this: I used to be a werewolf but Iím alright NOWwwwwwwwwwww!!

From a frostbite toe suffers our werewolf Tim,
But never worries for thatís not him,
For I know that he is far from grim,
As he was always so proper and trim.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 14, 2008, 04:10:36 PM
Crazy1van writ:
A Warrior Princess with much attitude
Thought to slay monsters while partially nude
But she had to fight tit for tat
And still Hercules knocked her flat
For the god found her demeanor most rude.
```````````````````````````````
IVAN, Dear Brother,
... Delightfully demented; XENA lives on! Sorry I missed replying to this, sooner.
----------------------------------------
The Warrior Princess, possessing much pulchritude
Sought to slay monsters, with her pendulous boobs;
She fought tats for tits,
Being an au naturale BRIT,
Yet, PLAYBOY, begged her to pose, in the nude.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 14, 2008, 04:33:32 PM

Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Back, in AD 1990, I worked the graveyard shift, in a huge warehouse, and, it was, after months, of this suffering, that, a friend sprung that line on me: "I used to be a werewolf but Iím alright NOWwwwwwwwwwww!!"; it had been a particularly exhausting night, and, as he drove me home, he said it! We broke up, laughing, hysterically!
... Brain-dead half-wit, that, I was, at that point, I immediately chimed in, with: "I used to be a WAREHOUSE, but, I'm all right Nooooooowwwwwww!" Tears rolled down our faces; our laughter beyond control!
... Here, is a candid re-write, of your latex... er, latest, opus.
... Ahhh, the O'PUS Family! They take The wearin' o' The Green, most seriously!
``````````````````````````````````````````
From Paw-in-Mouth disease suffers our werewolf Tim,
He's unconcerned, for thatís business as usual, for him,
I watched, as he ate THE BROTHERS GRIMM,
Yet his figure always remains, so svelte and trim.
``````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 15, 2008, 01:34:33 PM
Ode to Tim of werewolf fame from his fang-mely member brother in the emerald isle.

It's off to the convention in make-up goes he,
Although we know that it is as real as you or me,
Did I imagine his fangs gleam at thee,
No it was the thought of that free-be,
So look at the grin and the glee,
Tim is having the time of his life you'll agree.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 22, 2008, 10:16:00 PM
tv horror
Ode to Tim of werewolf fame from his fang-mily member brother in the emerald isle.

It's off to the convention in make-up goes he,
Although we know that it is as real as you or me,
Did I imagine his fangs gleam at thee,
No it was the thought of that free-be,
So look at the grin and the glee,
Tim is having the time of his life you'll agree.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Brother MAURICE, & UMA FANG-MILY,
... You got that right! WONDERFEST was WONDER-FULL! Seeing TERRY, RAYMOND & NICOLE, CREEPY JEFF, ELDER ROBERT, MISS DRAC & CONNIE, and, anyone, else, whom I'm forgetting to mention, was a Great JOY! I'm sure, that, you were with us, in Spirit, me Irish brother! Oh, and, since this is a LIMERICK Thread; Have another!
```````````````````````````````
The Second KARLOFF FRANKENSTEIN,
Got a BRIDE, whom, he thought looked "fine!";
Yet, him, she dissed,
With an unforgettable hiss,
He should have gotten pissed, on some wine!
{"DRINK... GOOOOODDD!"}
... MORE, SOON!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 25, 2008, 08:37:22 AM
welcome back Tim, the place was so such emptier without your's and the other absent members  presence.
 
Now that the werewolf and his crew are back,
Ready to slew and hack,
The forum seems brighter and not dull as a sack,
hopefully everythings back on track,
It sure is better than a torturous day on the rack,
Knowing that alls well with the horror World and the UMA pack.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 26, 2008, 07:31:38 AM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Thanks,for your appreciative sentiments!
... "To slew & hack"?; "Dull, as a Sack"?
... MAURICE, unless you're keeping secrets, you've ne'er been to HACKENSACK!
So, let's, all, put on our NEW JERSEY... Sorry, our NEW "JOISEY", and look in, on some of its local inhabitants!
`````````````````````````````````````

When FRANKIE MEET WOLFIE; OY VEY!
They nearly ruined everyone's day!
'Til they had their big fight,
upon one Full Moon night,
Then, their troubles were all washed away!
                         .... Olde Yiddishe Limerick
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & MONSTER MAFIOSO-WHAT!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 26, 2008, 08:28:22 AM
Aah it's good to be back and I'm not talking Hackensack, so here's more from the emerald your hack. Thats in case you don't give a heck.



Frankenstein got his doctor Pretorious,
Their plan was to make a mate gorgeous,
Yet their way was not that gregarious,
For in the end proved quite riotous,
For all to be dead that must be really glorious!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 26, 2008, 09:31:53 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Ha-Ha! ;D Nice segue, from FRANKENSTEIN, into a DRACULA {& LUGOSI, no less!} Punch-Line! Mayhap, I can continue the thread, with BELA'S second greatest characterization.
````````````````````````````````````````````````````
YGOR used THE MONSTER, saying: "He does things for me."
Knocking off Jurors, on a mad killing spree;
When WOLFE shot him dead, YGOR'S plan died;
THE MONSTER'S plan, for revenge, after he cried:
To kill WOLFE'S Son... 'til DADDY gave MONSTER a Sulphur-Pit Wedgie!
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS Von WOLFSTEIN & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 26, 2008, 10:29:01 PM
Brother Tim or dear baron to his enemies, here be another to add to the fold. See what you have done youíve created your own emerald monster, so its goodbye from me and a quick GRrrrrrrrr to the mob. Flamin touches who needs em. 



Poor Ygor so soon after his false hangin,
Needed a friend to do his biddin,
Along came the monster found sleepin,
So now he needed the monster a stridin,
And a Frankenstein was a needin,
Ah for a quick jolt of lightenin,
Little Peterís brain was in the reckonin,
But in the end a Lou would do without the pit and the fussing!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 26, 2008, 10:45:17 PM
Larry wanted to wipe out his curse
So he sought a doctor whose skills were diverse.
But the promise of a cure
was Count Dracula's lure
to bring Big Frankie back; which was worse!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 27, 2008, 08:19:43 AM
TV HORROR writ:"See what you have done?! Youíve created your own emerald monster"!

``````````````````````````````
My EMERALD MONSTER is quite green,
Yet, not, from envy, but, spleen,
His bile, morose,
His breath, halitose,
And, everything, else, is obscene!
```````````````````````````````
... Now, I'm even scaring ME!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS Von WOLFSTEIN & FIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 27, 2008, 08:43:21 AM
This is for the Crazy 1 and itís nice to see a new face even if it is a furry one.


Good evening Mr Renfield and now behold,
All the tales of vampires and werewolves be told,
The legends of folklore from the landís of old,
Be true and worth their weight in gold,
As the blood is the life, youíre now welcomed into the fold,
With the vampires bite your soul is sold,
Now you have only to fear the bold,
With their torches flames and jeers that scold!
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 30, 2008, 12:40:09 AM
There, once, was a Vampire, from Transylvania,
Who, as soon as he saw ya, would drain ya;
In his appetite, foul,
He would snarl & growl,
Then, as his slave, he'd retain ya!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 30, 2008, 01:11:48 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... In Honour of this Thread, being read, for the 3000th time, I submit this commemorative poem... ok, ok, LIMERICK!... for your erudition, as a stern reminder, that:
YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE!
... &, in failing, to do that, to get a LAUGH, instead!
... Thanks, to all you brave stalwarts, who risk ridicule, and rejection, by daring, to write such vile humours!
````````````````````````````````````````
Our limerick thread breaks the 3000 mark,
Of loyal readership, who, indulge, as a lark,
Their love, of bad rhyming puns,
From moonlight, to sun,
From one, whose bite, is, far worse, than his bark!
``````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 31, 2008, 12:36:37 AM
Three cheers for Baron Tim, if youíre not in you cannot win, he got the landmark 3000.  3000 odd (very odd!) readers of this long forgotten lore have come in from the dark to enjoy this lark.  What is a limerick but a ďsour RichardĒ (Groan).



It is in fortuitous times,
That the UMA pack do rhymes,
Some are down right bad,
But reading them aloud makes me glad,
With a beat that not quite chimes,
And we keep clean from all the dust and the grimes,
So we monsters can enjoy without being sad,
All the poor limericks no matter how we are clad.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on July 31, 2008, 10:58:42 AM

   "Whoever would've thunk
     That this thread would have so much spunk.
     And, dare I say
     That the UMA
     Has troops with a lot of neat junk."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 31, 2008, 01:41:49 PM
I really must get a life, as the werewolf's remark cut like a knife. Here is a limerick in honour of Meek.


With an ungodly shriek,
Itís someone called Meek,
Whose neat replies we now seek,
In the forum of those that are foul and reek,
Legends are made from this mountainous peak,
And not someoneís version of a home grown geek.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on July 31, 2008, 02:17:10 PM

   One needn't  have very much courage
   To fling about heaps o' verbage.
   Listeners never can tell,
   When under the Limerick's spell
   That we're poets who need to be discouraged.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 31, 2008, 03:20:50 PM
Dearest MEEK & MAURICE,
... Bon Mots, to all!
``````````````````````````````````````````
Ye Sands, of Time, become Green Slime,
Whence Limericks doth afflict one's Mind,
In Horse-Pill Dose,
Our Friendly "Roasts",
Devoured, by FANG-MILY... They keep us close.
```````````````````````````````````````````
... {To the toilet! Or, "Water-Closet"; whate'er ye prefer!} MUA-HA-HA-HA-HA-ET-CE-TE-RA!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 02, 2008, 12:00:12 AM
We should be copyrighting these or Howlmark will make a fortune, as from our fun comes the bad pun. Iíve caught this from Tim the rhyming bard and now thereís no stopping me, as youíre now part of my captive audience.   



When all the denizens of the dark are called at night,
It is the time to be of fright,
Neither storm nor the crisp Moonlight,
Can stop you from your pursuit or flight,
As you race with your heart so tight,
From the creatures that hunt by sight,
All that you can hope is for your soul to be contrite.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 02, 2008, 07:35:41 AM
Dear Brother, MAURICE & UMA FANG-MILY,
```````````````````````````````
Strictly, "OFF-THE CUFF", these two new off'rings are,
'Tis too early a morning, for my wit, to stretch, far,
My most 'umble apologies,
For, if these sound, off-key...
You should hear me play the GUITAR!
````````````````````````````````````````````
"I've created a MONSTER!", the olde saying goes,
Extolled, by TV HORROR, who claims my work "blows"...
... Chunk-y, or, funky,
They're yours, to dispose,
Of corpse, in the night, they, eerily, glows!
``````````````````````````````````
There, once, was a MONSTER, from EIRE,
Who blamed his poetic madness & fire,
Upon an Olde WEREWOLF Chap,
Whose puns were mere crap,
Released, to expel the gas, out, of his spare tire.
```````````````````````````````````
... Seriously, Brother MAURICE, keep up the Good.. Oopsi! I meant, "BAD" {my bad!} Work!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS GOO-O-ODD, BAD & UGLY {You BET-TY Your Life!}, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 02, 2008, 02:51:09 PM
We are fang-mily (hey someone should write a tune with that) and the urge is there for us to purge the fire in our soul that glows. 



Sometimes itís nice to get of so cheap,
When said werewolf is far from a creep,
With his deep cutting wit,
That ends so far of the pulpit
And his meanings come off so deep,
But in the end all I can do is weep,
At the humour that is ours and not some twit.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 02, 2008, 09:01:06 PM
*SNIFF!* {Teary-eyed WEREWOLF, unabashedly wipes away lachrymal secretions}
... Thankee, M'Lad! Nice, to be so appreciated; 'tis mutual, I assure Thee!
Meanwhile, back, to the Subject at hand...
 
````````````````````````````````````````````
There was, once, in France, a HUNCHBACK,
Who, entranced, gave the Church-bells no slack,
For The Gypsy, ESMERALDA, he pined, 
His Love, drove him out of his mind,
For, by her great beauty, he was taken aback.
````````````````````````````````````
... Or, Mayhap, this one:
````````````````````````````````````
There, once, was a HUNCHBACK, in France,
Who rang the Church-bells, entranced,
He fell, for ESMERALDA, the Gypsy,
His Love, for her, made him tipsy,
Yet, whilst, in that state, his heart danced.
`````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 03, 2008, 12:28:30 AM
My dear friend Tim, I got all teary eyed myself being left upon the shelf like some half eaten elf, when you wrote with so much to emote. If itís a tale of a hunchback you want to hear now is the time so never fear.


Being as ugly as the man in the moon,
Brought tears of dismay ever so soon,
Poor Quasimodo sure had his high noon.
But not from his honey allcoon,
For Esmeralda hated being treated as a loon,
And all he could offer was a bell like croon,
When the poor fellow died he was seen floating as high as a balloon,
Now he is remembered in some Disney cartoon. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 03, 2008, 08:00:46 AM
WOWSERS, MAURICE!
... A veritable Essay; no... A Dissertation, in rhyming couplet, triplet & quadruplelet! Mayhap, Thou wert, even, having a sextuplet, in the Port-o-let! Well-Done, JOHN DONNE! ;D
``````````````````````````````````````
Ah, the IRISH penchant, for BLARNEY, so choice,
Full-bloom, as yon Poet assumes Balladeer's Voice,
Reminds me, more, than a bit, o' JAMES JOYCE,
As his words makes me laughing eyes, moist,
'Til, hit, with The Kitchen Sink, in surrender, I rejoice!
```````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BLARNEY RUBBLE, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on August 03, 2008, 10:26:55 AM

     Fritz muttered to himself over lunch
     That Henry F. was in need of a punch.
     The Herr Doktor would start in
     Whilst wearing a lopsided grin,
     By saying "You sure about that Fritz or do you just have a hunch?"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 03, 2008, 02:05:18 PM
I have to get this off my chest instead of the Barons family crest although he may beat his breast or expand his proud vest I have only just tried my very best.




In the olde town of Transylvania,
Itís kind of hard to see ya,
Yet look at the great towns encyclopaedia,
Itís listed under horror mass media,
The coming of monsters and the foretold paranoia.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 05, 2008, 01:53:17 PM
There, once, was a LYCANTHROPIC Fellow, named TALBOT,
Whose victims were, mostly, innocent HALIBUTS,
Sounds "FISHY", you say?
"RED HERRING"?!... Hooray!
SUSHI WEREWOLVES, everywhere, go NUTS!
`````````````````````````````````````````````
... This was told, to me, by a very olde WEREWOLF, centuries ago. I offer it, here, as a charming example, of how un-convolutedly brains worked, in those simpler times, of the days, of YORE, EEYORE, YGOR... & IGOR... &... E-GOR! {My Wise-Crack Legal Team; although, one, of them is an Ass... but, he worked, for DISNEY!}
... Surely, I can be absolved, of sharing this, since I know, that, you'd never suspect Li'l Olde Moi, of writing this, or, even, pulling your leg..... or, finger!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
No last name necessary... nor, first, for that matter. Middle initials are "F."& "M.", should anyone inquire... B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 05, 2008, 06:40:15 PM
LYCANTHROPIC!!! I cant even say it never mind spell it, Tim you are a cad and I know that it might make you mad if only for a tad. I'm now convinced that you've infected me with your canny ways as I've became a poet and I didn't know it (agggh there I go again writing in that type of vein).

In honour of Fritz Iíll now give you a blitz of an actor far from all the so-called glitz.


There was once a young man, who had a taste for a fly,
Renfield was his name and he was not very sly,
But blood was the life and so he must die,
Leaving us to have a good cry,
Such was the actor Dwight Frye.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 06, 2008, 02:41:53 PM
tv horror writ: "you've infected me with your canny ways as I've became a poet and I didn't know it (agggh there I go again writing in that type of vein)."
...........................
You see, my dear Brother, MAURICE {SPACE COWBOY; GANGSTER OF LOVE},
... Were you an American, you'd know the last line, of:
       I'm a poet and I don't know it,
       BUT, MY FEET SHOW IT... THEY'RE LONG FELLOWS!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

          ODE TO BRAMWELL FLETCHER
         ----------------------------------
There, once, was a man, who laughed himself, mad.
Got chummy, with THE MUMMY, and, lost it; too bad!
To the Nut-House he went,
To do his last stint,
But, at least, he died, happy! I'm glad!
```````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 06, 2008, 10:33:27 PM
Whoís that rapping, nay a gentle tapping at my chamber door, itís Longfellow looking back his feet! My dear Tim, if itís a mummy you want then try this one for size (12).

To keep the mummy in his wrap,
Donít fall into his wily trap,
By brewing the tana leaves,
Till all about them sits and grieves,
So before you turn in that treasure map,
Take all you can and donít be a sap.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 07, 2008, 04:25:21 AM
When explorers seek treasures like Imhotep's
what isn't klar is why they aren't kept
from fattening their purse
when they found out of the curse
unless their translators just happened to skip some steps
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 07, 2008, 01:18:01 PM
Wow Ivan you got a word that rhymed with Imhotep, if only I was that inept.  So for todayís fare weíll rise a hair and rhyme for a dare.


If the mummy appeared at a whim,
Who are we to say that he canít swim,
May be he is just there for a hair trim,
After 3000 years it takes so little to please him,
Or he might tear you limb from limb.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 07, 2008, 01:27:01 PM
Dear Brothers, IVAN & MAURICE,
... Sifting, through your limerick poems, has been, like, unearthing an ancient  Tomb, in the shifting sands, of Egypt. Your Glyphics instill a sense of Hiero-worship, in me!
```````````````````````````````````
That ancient MUMMY, known, as IM-HOTEP,
Became ARDATH BEY, using a fake rep,
His plan, though, went awry,
When he couldn't make HELEN die,
Instead, ISIS lifted the curse, from that schlep! {IM-HOTEP, BYE-BYE!}
````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIM-SOHEP, THE MUMMY'S UNCLE! It's the Truth, SoHep me!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 08, 2008, 06:47:40 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Not, quite, a "Classic Monster", but, a luvable li'l tyke, nonetheless,,, and, a venerable Classic Icon, in his own way.
----------------------------------------------
There, once, was a Ghost, named CASPER,
Whose After-Life was 'rated': "Exasper",
Too friendly a Lad,
He made children glad,
So, despite being dead... no disaster!
----------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
THE SPOOKY OOTMAH, Of Loooong Ago, B.G.G.!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 09, 2008, 06:29:31 AM
There once was a zombie named Tim
Whose undead prospects were grim
Dracula frowned
when his zombie fell down
and muttered, "This vun is qvite dim."
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 09, 2008, 12:28:45 PM
Dear Tim and Ivan, As you can see Iím back with a  lot more flack so being a private first class will keep me on track.


Casper may have been a cute little ghost,
But did you know that with his tongue he could roast,
I have known him to leave ones face as dark as toast,
All because we refused him his own post,
Thatís why we love him the most,
And thatís no idle boast.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 09, 2008, 06:59:49 PM
Dear IVAN & MAURICE,
````````````````````````
There are many Spirits, in EIRE,
Plus, Goblins, Banshees & Vampires,
Their Legends abound,
So, walking around,
Wear DEPENDS, or, make friends, with a WASHER & DRYER!
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 09, 2008, 10:37:02 PM
The Mummy's linens are kept under wraps
So his smells are then held in his trap
And Drac can't be foiled
when wearing his native 'soil'
So the Goblins must deal with that crap
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 09, 2008, 11:54:47 PM
Dear fiends both Tim and Ivan, It is sublime to make a rhyme at this most important time.


Karloffís mummy had a scarab for a ring,
But all he could think off was Helen as a fling,
Now in the picture were Doctor Muller and John of course,
As her knights upon a charging horse,
So the mummy must die with his most treasured bling,
For his endless love was all he could bring,
With his joyous heart at the very source,
He died happy at the foot of his beloved Horis.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 10, 2008, 06:04:33 AM
GOOODDD MOOOORNING, UMA!
``````````````````````````````````````
IVAN is crazy! A Sailor, In A MONSTER ARMY,
Naval Destroyer/Navel-Gazer; Oh, so Smarmy;
When we meet, face-to face,
GOD permit me the Grace,
To embrace my WEREWOLF BROTHER, so Alarming!
```````````````````````````````````````
To the faire Isle, of EIRE, I'd be blest, to travel,
To meet TV HORROR, and, his story, unravel,
Quaffing Guinness, with him, in a Pub,
'Midst, all, of the Irish locals' hub-bub,
Then - Sneak Attack! Drinkin' all o' their blood - How NOVEL!
``````````````````````````````````````````````
HAVE A NICE DAY!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & "FRIENDS, TASTE GOO-O-OODD-D!", B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 10, 2008, 06:52:12 AM
The Baron's one wolf I look forward to meeting
And TV Horror will be part of that Greeting
an autograph from Tall Man Angus Scrimm
will have to suffice to stand in
For our UMA comrade in the United King... dom
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on August 10, 2008, 09:28:49 PM
This is the first time I've been to this thread
It appears some who rhyme here have been misled
in thinking they're some kind of poet
when they really stink and they know it

Terry Ingram / August 2008
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 10, 2008, 09:42:29 PM
Many thanks for the very kind gesture that you are doing me Ivan I am really grateful, but our mad Tim is out for a surprise as I must be the only Irishman never to drink WINE! Well I am in good company as the Count also refused a beverage and he is an honorary Irishman (Stokers lineage).  P.S Oops I think I've just been insulted by the General



Lugosi and Karloff faced off in the invisible ray,
When these two titans have lots to say,
If you know your horrors then this is the way,
Because theyíll come to grips come what may,
As the ground rules are theirs to lay,
For in the end it is up to one of them to betray,
And for the other to kill and slay,
Like a black cat that is out to play.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 11, 2008, 02:06:45 PM
Dear GENERAL TERRY,
... Your very first time?! Why, you handled your Limerick, like, a VIRGIN, true, and, now, you can play, with the other shameless hussies, too!

``````````````````````````````````````````
'Twouldst appear, that, our TERRY is a poet, too;
A Limerick Artiste, who is, long, past due,
Coffin up "Bottom Of The Barrel" sentiments,
Yet, howe'er base, the Basement meant,
No quarrel, here; join yer UMA Buddies, for an ice-cold brew!
``````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & GOO-O-ODD-DD VIRGINS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 11, 2008, 09:58:53 PM
If they visit even once, then it is not that they are ready to denounce, it is more that they are here to pounce. I love the way, that when they come it is to play during their fun packed rhyming stay.



Why is it that most mad fiends are rich,
While we are left to dig a ditch,
Ah it makes you wonder,
Although not that we ponder,
As our lives go off without a hitch,
Like some big fat and frumpy witch,
Or they could just pull us asunder,
Amidst the rain and rolling thunder.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 12, 2008, 06:35:44 PM
TERRY meant, by his po'm, nothin', agin us;
'Tis, not, in 'is lofty Nature; No real menace,
'Twas, why, I writ,
My bit, o' Half-wit,
& invited 'im, to join us, in a GUINNESS!
```````````````````````````````
... For, 'e's a jolly STOUT fellow!
... DUBLIN 'is size, 'e will be, if'n 'e keeps it up, too!
``````````````````````````````
TIMOTHY O' BLARNEYSTONE, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 12, 2008, 08:58:41 PM
The Baron has spoken and his words ring true, although if he keeps up that Guinness drink'in then he'll end up BLARNEYSTONED!

It makes me so merry,
To welcome our beloved Terry,
To while away his day,
During his extend stay,
while I don't come from county Derry,
I do get festive about the holly and the odd berry!


Hey you try finding something the rhymes with Terry and I don't mean that much maligned Ray Ferry.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 13, 2008, 07:30:03 AM
So on Friday the costumes we'll wear
But Saturday the MONSTER will leer
Sunday should prove the best
At this year's Fright Night Film Fest
When the Werewolf of Wolfstein should appear
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 13, 2008, 02:29:16 PM
There, once, was a Film Fest, in Kentucky,
Those, who, attended, felt themselves, "LUCKY",
The UMA brought a strong presence,
NO! Not, AH-NOLDT & Donald Pleasance;
But, otherwise, everything, else, was "just DUCKY!"
```````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 13, 2008, 09:36:45 PM
I am sad at the loss of my pals but I'll make do with Lou and a bunch of the gals. So I'll whoop it up in the Malamoot saloon. Take care if you must dare in Ole Kentucky town. By the way Ivan and Tim I was working on a rhyme with LUCK in it but have you ever tried finding a word that rhymes (Ha Ha ha) All the best and safe journey.   
Ah the limerick thread,
Will be quite dead,
With the absence of both my furry ones,
But never fear for I will defend against the great guns,
Over my cold dead carcuss will they have to tread,
For I am legend and must be dread.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 14, 2008, 02:43:34 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... PLUCK, MUCK, TRUCK, PUCK, RUCK-SACK, TUCK, YUCK, BUCK, SUCK, as well as:
N-YUK, N-YUK, N-YUK... and, an order of CURLY-FRIES!
 ... I didn't leave anything out, did I? HUCK, no!
````````````````````````````````
Tomorrow, with IVAN & TIMMY, off-line,
Until Sunday {or some later time},
Our friend, who's a Schnorrer,
Cyber-moniker: TV HORROR,
Will, still, haunt this scene, of our crimes! ;)
````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 14, 2008, 03:24:29 PM
My Dear Baron I wish thee and that young whelp of a cub Ivan well on your journey to educate others into our ways.

So before you go into the hub,
Make sure you avoid the local pub,
As you are trusted with the pups welfare,
So when you make that grand entrance to their fanfare,
Remember your lines and try not to flub,
While little Ivan goes rub a tub dub.
 
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 15, 2008, 08:53:29 AM
Ivan may be offline for the weekend
But Kavik can still limmerick with his friends
No need for me to stop
when I travel with a laptop
and soon I'll have photos to send
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 15, 2008, 03:51:39 PM
Dear IVAN, MAURICE & FANG-MILY,
``````````````````````````
We'll arrive, at THE FILM FEST, late, on Friday night,
When the Full Moon is cresting, at its height;
I hope, to meet KAVIK,
&, that, he won't make me sick,
Lest, my WEREWOLF barf cause quite a Fright!
```````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 15, 2008, 04:49:43 PM
My two dear friends have left me in tears,
But alas not free of my deep found fears,
I'm as flat as a card from fleers,
One thought will bring on the cheers,
Of my two werewolf pals sharing so beers. 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 15, 2008, 11:07:33 PM
The Friday Night Fates were not kind
For Tim the Baron I could not find
But the evening was still good
I posed with Li'l Dead Riding Hood
Then we retired to our room to unwind
(http://www.geocities.com/crazy_ivan_thx11/FrightNightFilmFest_sm.jpg)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 16, 2008, 12:38:01 PM
Hello Ivan, you're going to have to level some more on the UNWINDING bit, Lil dead Riding Hood indeed.


So along to the convention you must hurry,
least you miss all that is tall and half furry,
While there try to avoid the salty food,
If you are in it for good,
As I've tried to avoid the slurry,
Now that all of the posts are in a flurry.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 16, 2008, 04:54:30 PM
tell me if you've heard this one:

So I'm sittin at my favorite space,
and this giant ape walks into the place.
Climbs up on a stool
but the bartender's cool,
says "Hey buddy - why the Kong face?"


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 16, 2008, 05:25:43 PM
Hello Packy in honour of the one who started this thread, I'll keep you from bed or you'll laugh until you're bled.

Quasimodo and Kong went though Hell,
As those of us could tell,
Hey tell me this my friend Kong,
Why is your face so darn long,
You're not as famous as me full well,
But your face sure rings a familiar bell.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 16, 2008, 10:19:42 PM
Quote
I'll keep you from bed or you'll laugh until you're bled.

I humbly thank you, and as a matter of fact...

Once laughing so hard that I bled,
blood soaked through my bed and bedspread.
My poor wife said "What!?
Are you sliced? Are you cut?"
I said no it was just something I read!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 16, 2008, 11:09:30 PM
Youíre more than welcome my friend; it is always a pleasure to read this thread.

Who can forget the beds placed head to head,
From the great Son of Frankenstein in that house of dread,
They hanged poor Ygor until he was dead,
But what they did not know was that he had fled,
Then the monster appeared and frightened little Peter in his own bed,
This was the land where angels feared to tread,
But into the sulphur pit the monster must be led.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 18, 2008, 01:13:42 PM
Dear Brothers, PACKY PAUL, IVAN & MAURICE,
`````````````````````````````````````
A Limerick, a day, keeps the BARON a-baying... at the Moon,
Which, whilst quite full, now, shall, wanly, deflate, too soon;
Reduced, to his human guise,
He ducks, as time flies,
Lest he be mistaken, not, for a HERrON, but, a LOON!
``````````````````````````````````````````````
~ {Singin' his LOONEY TOON!... er, TUNE.  ;)
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS IS BACK! B.G.G. Be Afraid, Be Very, Very, Afraid!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 18, 2008, 04:13:22 PM
"But Baron!" I cried with regret
"Your moon-cup is half full I bet!
When full brightly soon,
not Heron nor Loon
but a fully flocked fine Were-Egret!

I know that's your leg, and I'll pull it -
but before you cram me into your gullet
You had better beware
of the back of my hair
Your demise may be my SILVER MULLET!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 18, 2008, 06:57:46 PM
Oh the thought makes me cringe of Packy's hairy backy but now that the masters back I can finally hit the sack.

With my new avatar all a switch,
I can get rid of this awful itch,
For this is truly who I am,
And I don't frankly give a damn,
So it's off to this forum without a hitch,
Unless this computer finds a new glitch.


Welcome back my friends (the computers went all misty, sob)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 19, 2008, 12:06:38 AM
To PACKY PAUL, Moi replieth, sans {R}EGRETS, or, intent, to offend:
By MOON-CUP, I hope, that, Thou dost, not, refer, to Moi "DEPENDS"!
More, they be, than, half-full,
When I'm on a roll, it taketh its toll,
Especially, the way ye Load maketh mine suspenders BEND!  ;D LMAO!
```````````````````````````````````````
To pull my leg, wouldst strain said Load,
So, please, do, neither, prod, nor, goad,
Else, filled, with regrets & more, you'll be,
'Struth, were I, you, I'd, wisely, flee,
Lest, Thou & Thy MULLET, end up, flattened, aside ye road! ::)
*     *    *    *     *    *   *   *   *    *   *   *
STAND BACK, ALL, HE'S GONNA EXPLO-OOO-ODD-DEE-E!!!!
*     *    *    *    *     *     *     *     *     *   *
For Moi part, o' this Even's festivities: "That's all, folks!",
My Job come, first, and, then... more jokes!
Tomorrow, on-line, I'll, again, "go, for broke",
Amidst all ye Lovely Ladies & amiable Blokes!  :-*
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 19, 2008, 12:26:07 AM
The Baron's return is cause for rejoice
But do let me add my own paltry voice
Madfrog and I weren't surprised
when Tim transformed to werewolf before our eyes
Move over del Toro, Herron's my wolfman of choice!
(http://photos-a.ak.facebook.com/photos-ak-sf2p/v309/160/26/1041805702/n1041805702_126944_8616.jpg)
Myself, Tim, and my friend Yvonne at the Fright Night Film Fest
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 19, 2008, 03:57:25 PM
Dear Brother, IVAN,
````````````````````````````````````````
IVAN & YVONNE, you were a real treat, to meet!
My WERE-BROTHER, you were a Bliss, to greet;
For you, &, KEVIN, of MONSTERLAND TOYS,
I chose, to transform, with THE HOWLING Noise,
Into my vicious & vile Bestial form, from head to feet!
`````````````````````````````````````````
... Neat, to think, that, a few scraps, of foam seat padding, and, some hanks, of crepe hair, can metamorphose, with a touch, of paint, into a snarling WOLF MAN! THANKS, for being there!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 19, 2008, 04:04:41 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
``````````````````````````````````
TV HORROR, of you, IVAN & I spoke,
Appreciating your Brotherhood, a Holy cloak,
Despite the distance,
There is no resistance,
You live in our hearts, and shall, 'til we croak!
```````````````````````````````````
... OH, NO! THE ATTACK OF THE WERE-FROGS!
{I dibs KERMY!  ;) }
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 19, 2008, 11:52:48 PM
Thank you My dear friends both Tim and Ivan, I'm all choked up to be recognized by my peers so I'll just refrain from any of my unfounded tears.  Uma watch out the boy's are back in town!


With the baying at the Moon,
My wolves have arrived all a croon,
Now the horror world will have soon,
Two werewolves and a Hyde like loon,
Their mission to spread a rhyme and that's their boon,
So watch out world for the next high noon.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 22, 2008, 01:09:10 PM
There, once, was a WEREWOLF, named IVAN,
Who traveled VASARIA, in a SPY-VAN;
Seeking out fellow MONSTERS,
like, BORIS, BELA, &, THE LONSTER,
Because, our man, IVAN, is a really big FAN!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 23, 2008, 08:13:10 AM
A CHANGLING AVATAR is our Irish Lad, MAURICE,
First, ASH; now, HYDE: We should call the POLICE!
May be just the thing;
He'll be caught, in a STING,
Unless, he shows up, as JASON VOORHEES!
...................................
VOORHEES: A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW,
VORHEES: A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW,
VORHEES: A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW,
WHICH NOBODY LIVES, TO TELL!
..............................
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on August 23, 2008, 07:32:41 PM
I've stumbled back into the ring,
for yet another limerick to sing,
but like standing at a public urinal,
I've gone shy and can't go at all. 

:-[ sorry

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 23, 2008, 09:22:43 PM
Thank you Tim for that rousing cheer and now for the air to clear.

With the convention over and things to unpack,
It is now time for that three pronged attack,
First of all I'll head off the incoming flak,
Then I'll defend both front and back,
And finally put things back on track,
Then what's over I'll just ransack.

P.S Look who's back for an timely pun it's our General after some fun.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 23, 2008, 11:29:25 PM
There once was a General, named TERRY, 8)
Who, of Limericks, was quite wary,  :-[
He, once, tried, to scold, >:(
But, now, is quite bold, :-*
Learning, to rhyme, CURLY, MOE & LARRY! ;D
````````````````````````````````````
MAURICE, he is turning, into Mad MISTER HYDE,
Split-Personality, which, to himself, he confides,
Aggressively arguing pros & cons,
He'll become a much better mon,
If, instead, of drinking his potion, he swallows his pride.
{Of course, the same can be said of all of us!} ::)

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 25, 2008, 01:24:03 AM
"It's waning!" Said LARRY TALBOT, one night,
"No more evil, from me, for a double fortnight!"
"I'd much rather be dead,
Than, live, through it, again!"
... Ah, but, such, was this WOLF MAN'S plight!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 25, 2008, 08:33:05 AM
Dear Baron and Fang-mily, I tend to get carried away (usually by the white coats) I suppose writing in such dark prose.


I may have my demons and a dark side,
But what can you expect from an insane Hyde,
May be I can tone down the heckle,
For I am the good doctor Jekyll,
And we all know what comes before a fall, me and my pride,
So I'll endeavour to change before that wild ride.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 25, 2008, 10:36:15 AM
Quote
I've stumbled back into the ring,
for yet another limerick to sing,
but like standing at a public urinal,
I've gone shy and can't go at all. 

 sorry

Terry since you had to bring up the public urinal, perhaps we should examine this, found written on the stall in the UMA restroom:

Here I sit broken hearted
Tried to Limerick but barely started
To those who read these lines of wit:
it would be dangerous to admit

anonymous bosch
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 25, 2008, 03:29:24 PM
Phew! that was close when I read the line broken hearted, I had a thought of you on the stall Packy. What would your line have been that rhymed with "broken hearted?).  It's O.K people you can rest easy theres no foul winds coming our way.

So before you come out of the stall,
Leave your name and rank on the restroom wall,
And remember you belong to this mans army so stand tall,
And keep up those limericks for you have some gall,
Now take a quick run and watch you don't fall.
     
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on August 25, 2008, 08:23:48 PM

   Having little or no thought at all
   On Loo walls they always do scrawl.
   With bockety timing,
   And purloined rhyming
   Their prose doth certainly appall.


    "Meek"
   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 25, 2008, 10:25:43 PM
Whence said Thread "goes off its Nutter",
MEEK'S "gentle hint", doth, Good Reason, mutter,
So, let's crawl, out, o' ye Pit o' Slime,
A-fresh, ourselves, with verse, sublime,
As we draw our minds, out, o' ye vile gutter!

```````````````````````````````
There, once, was a MONSTER, quite gross,
Wif attitude, bad, &, temper, morose,
Before 'e went barmy,
'E joined the UNIVERSAL MONSTER ARMY,
Now, 'e writes LIMERICKS {... or, sumph'n', quite close! ;) }
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 27, 2008, 09:29:20 AM
Good day to you baron and the motley crew.  The monsters of late have lost their mandate, so now is the time to make them all great.

How to stop an rampaging Mummy,
You could try the old double whammy,
Or a gun blast and a quick spear stab,
The bettingís are youíll still end up on a slab,
You could try a tried and true flim flammy,
By throwing him your great grandmammy,
If all else fails use a flaming touch for him to grab,
Hopefully heíll turn to ash while you make a quick dash back to the lab.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 27, 2008, 10:56:02 AM
The Creature's not easy to get,
He breaks my line and shreds my net.
But I hold up a snap-
shot of Flipper and: ZAP!
He remembers his fish etiquette.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 27, 2008, 10:51:58 PM
Greets, MAURICE! Good one {as usual}! ;D
&, PACKY, your observation proves, that, he's a real CREATURE ... of Habit! ;)
`````````````````````````````````
DRACULA awoke, when the sun arose,
Before he spoke, it hit his nose,
It made him sneeze,
&, unto dust, explode,
He forgot, poor Lad, his coffin-lid, to close!
```````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 27, 2008, 11:32:56 PM
Thank you Tim for the encouragement for I know that it was sincerely meant. Of sequels I now dwell, as you know full well and meets and greets get on so swell.   



The Frankenstein monster lay under an ice trap,
Along came Talbot and found him in his nap,
For the secrets of life and death he was led by map,
So he released the monster, but he caused a town flap,
The two titans of fear fought when the monster had got his zap,
And the Wolfman jumped for his neck to snap,
But plans were made for the dam and it blew up in their lap.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2008, 06:07:45 AM
DWIGHT FRYE'S Career was launched, at a very odd ANGLE,
For, most, of the time, he ended up, getting STRANGLED;
DRAC, once, broke his BACK,
He got hung up, by FRANK,
And, when, he helped HENRY, to "go fly a kite", he got MANGLED!
 
`````````````````````````````````````
... My computer has been down, for the past 4 days... good, to be back!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2008, 06:51:29 AM
How, on Earth, did we, ever, get, to LIMERICK Post # 250?!  :o
Why, with, all, of our wits, churning, along, quite nifty!  ;D
From PACKY, GENERAL TERRY & MEEK,  ::)
To IVAN, MAURICE & some WEREWOLF Geek,  ;)
And, so many others, who've offered their little mad "GIFTIE"!  :-*
```````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 30, 2008, 05:12:48 PM
Welcome back our great and powerful Tim, you were missed and all because of a rotten computer sim.


With our poor baronís computer broke,
The limerick thread has run amok,
And 250 posts so far and not one joke,
Itís a wonder that the thread never went up in smoke,
With all the good, the bad and the downright ugly you could choke,
I sometimes wonder why the Baron did not earlier croak. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 30, 2008, 05:41:02 PM
Here I sit, all broken hearted
Inside my ship; deployment's started
I can't log on that much
so I'll write just a touch
But my trip overseas will be well post-carded
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 30, 2008, 06:36:54 PM
Ah my friend Ivan it is good to hear your salty voice especially from our navy novice. So here is a rhyme from the five and dime.


Cats may be afraid of water,
But werewolves can for that matter,
So don't feel sad come on the post and natter,
Because we here are all as mad as a hatter,
And we all have limericks to slaughter. 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2008, 06:56:20 PM
To our dear MONSTER Brother, IVAN: "ANCHORS, AWAY!"
You live, in our hearts, whilst, on the ocean, you play,
Time will run, fast,
until, m'Lad, at last,
You return, to us, fully; as, for this, we pray.
```````````````````````````````````````````````
GOD-SPEED, Dear Friend!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 30, 2008, 11:08:12 PM
A life on the ocean wave might be all the rave, now hear this Ivan you behave.


With our Ivan now aboard his naval ship,
It is up to us to not let the board slip,
But to wave a hearty farewell and to get a firm grip,
And to toast our good fellow with wine sip,
Plus say Godspeed and have a safe trip.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 31, 2008, 05:33:39 AM
------------ One, from COLUMN A -----------------
4 THOUSAND & 13 Brave Souls have, now, read this thread,
Dost think, that, they might have a screw, loose, in the head?
To have read, the more, than, 250 replies,
They may, not, be nuts; in fact, quite, wise,
That, they allow us, our frothy madness, to be said, in their stead.

------------ &, One, from COLUMN B -------------

This thread hath been read, now, 4000 & 13 times,
What is it, that, excites this interest, in Rhymes?
Do they await our fall, from verbal grace?
Known, by the resounding "SPLAT", of our face,
Upon the low LIMERICK grounds; apt PUN-ishment, for our crimes?

``````````````````````````````
Thank you! I'll be here all week; please, be sure to tip your Waitress!  ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: ramsey37 on August 31, 2008, 08:00:02 AM
I think it's the "driving past a train wreck" syndrome: it's horrid, but you just can't stop looking at it ;)
George
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 31, 2008, 09:33:37 AM
Dear Brother, GEORGE,
... And, your point is?... ROTFLMAO! Seriously, Thou mayest ha'e hit ye nail, on ye proverbial head! Since Thou hast spaketh, out o' THY BRAVE FACE, with coherent thought, herewith, is a reprise, sans the usual Limerick Meter: {With apologies, to SIR PAUL McCARTNEY; feel free, to hum along}: ;)
```````````````````````````````````````
MISTER RAMSEY notified me,
But, he didn't make a LIMERICK, so, he couldn't post, for free,
I had another thought, and, it really punished me,
{And, a Flutter-By}
{My logic really smelt, so, I stick it, in your eye!}
FANGS, on HARRY POTTER,
FANGS, that would not die,
FANGS, on HARRY POTTER,
So do not ask me why!
---------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Ahhh - The luridly lucid, if, polluted, Stream of Consciousness, where train-wrecks occur with care-free abandon!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 31, 2008, 06:10:50 PM
 Oh the pain of rejection, many a night I've spent thinking of a new interaction, its not easy when you have to do the sole projection.  So my friend George this ones for you.

You may think of yourself as the Uber-Nerd,
But I'm not sure if thats what you heard,
We have to make rhymes like Richard the third,
or face Karloff the executioner with his eye brows flared.

OR

By George it is a train wreck,
I cant look even to check,
Oh it's only a damned rhyme,
if only I had a spare nickel or dime,
Then I could ask for them to leave the flight deck,
As my plane leaves from this foul and below attack. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 01, 2008, 06:03:52 AM
This is the DAY, in which we honour LABOUR, :)
A HOLIDAY, meant, to provide a restful Favour,  :P
I must be a Jerk; >:(
I, still, have to work, :(
But, the additional paycheck, is something I savour! ;D
````````````````````````````````````````````
HAPPY LABOUR DAY, ALL! :-*
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on September 01, 2008, 06:43:00 PM
For you all at Halloween (Bennett Cerf the web style)

What a marvelous beast the skeleton
his head can hold more than his belly can,
with a peek in his skull
all those brains mean he's full -
You may think he can't think but quite wellecan!



HAHAHAH and yuk yuk yuk




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 01, 2008, 07:34:49 PM
Good day to you Packy, I thought that your rhyme was quite tacky. So if you don't like this just call me backy.

skeleton's you say are good for a rattle,
But did you know that most were lost in battle,
So it's a quick slash to the funny bone,
That will certainly make his lack of body go prone,
And give the gossips a chance to tattle,
While we head off into the sunset with horse and cattle.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on September 01, 2008, 07:49:26 PM
AND A GREAT day back Mr Horror - say, did you hear the one about...?....

Two skellies walked into a bar
but they sure didn't get very far.
There were folks wearing bibs
and eyeballing their ribs,
for the sign backwards read Q-B-BAR!





Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 01, 2008, 10:09:10 PM
Buddy can you spare a rhyme, for your limerick was just Divine. Way to go Packy and I'm sorry to have used the term tacky it should have been wacky. So long as you don't hold it against me AghHHHHHHH!


Alas poor Yorick I knew him well,
In some damp ground he doth now dwell,
His skull is now a trophy which ain't to swell,
And on Moonlight nights his soul can still give out a yell,
So fear not for our friend as he is far from the pit's of hell,
Because he had a poets heart that death could not quell.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 02, 2008, 02:22:22 PM

There once was a Hunchback, named FRITZ,
Who was, really, a terrible DITZ;
Abnormal brain, he SWITCHED;
Gave DOC FRANKENSTEIN, FITS,
But, "ITS RECIPIENT" hung him, high, "ON THE FRITZ" LIST!
`````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 03, 2008, 12:25:41 PM
Ah dear Baron Tim it is always a pleasure to hear from you, and to take in your alternative view.



Be it ever so humble theres no place like home,
Now if you were a hunchbacked fiend bent like a gnome,
It would be hard for you to sing without the metronome,
So drink that honey for your sore throat and watch out for that mouth foam,
Then you'll feel ready to give that great concert beyond the thunderdome.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 03, 2008, 01:47:27 PM
THE WONDER, OF THE ANCIENT WORLD
-------------------------------------------
THE MUMMY, KHARIS, drinks TANA LEAF TEA,
Yet, never, seems, to need, to stop & pee!
Too much trouble, to unwrap,
Or, to take a crap, unhook his briefs?
He showed me, in silence, the Hieroglyph:"BAH! RELIEF!"
.......................................................................
Whatsamatta, KHARIS? BAST got your tongue?!
.......................................................................
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 03, 2008, 04:21:48 PM
Recipe for Sun baked Mummy, I hope that it will taste oh so yummy.



Take one Egyptian priest, keep him in the Sun to bake,
After one-hour turn him completely, in case he starts to cake,
Then hold his head for his foul tongue to take,
Remember to wrap him in bandages as a human snake,
When that part of him is done add some water from the lake,
Now boil in oil and incense and after that give him a good shake,
Donít forget to add a portion of tans leaves should the need arise for him to make,
Place in a tomb and seal with an added curse for 3000 years then leave to flake.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 03, 2008, 05:24:01 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Speaking, of treats, here's a tricky one:
````````````````````````````````````````
Nightfall brings an evil wave, of stark terror,
Those Un-Dead Children, of VLAD, THE IMPALER,
From coffin and crypt, they arise,
To, eerily, fill nocturnal skies,
With wings, damned, to seek, out, a blood-red dinner!
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 04, 2008, 01:31:46 AM
The Phantom of the Opera appeared
As all opera patrons had feared
But his mood was quite good
when he met Otis B Driftwood
And that Night at the Opera even he cheered
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 04, 2008, 03:20:40 PM
COUNT DRACULA bit GROUCHO'S Funny-Bone,
For, he'd, always, wanted a Comedic Vampire Clone,
He laughed: "Vot der heck!",
Two little Marx, left, on his neck,
were HARPO & CHICO, in some TWILIGHT ZONE! ::)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 04, 2008, 05:33:56 PM
My two favorite Ghouls have posted today, both Tim and Ivan no way!


On Skull island there was a brontosaurus,
To spell that we would need a good thesaurus,
Also there was a cheesy movie called  Dinosaurus,
But in order to rhyme  like a pro see BARON TIMOTHEUS!



My man Ivan has a scary name,
But I know full well his little game,
maybe just once I might try the same,
As he is a mean werewolf  to tame,
His passion is howling at the moon in frame,
Yet theres always that bit who would kill and maim,
And as we know Transylvanian creatures are always to blame.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 04, 2008, 07:49:53 PM
Some claim Dracula was the fallen apostle Judas
And I've read that a werewolf was the murderer Barabbas
To discover if there's any truth to 'em
I'll soon be in the city of Jerusalem
And I'll report back my findings to the class
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Meek on September 04, 2008, 08:40:57 PM

   Why do I suddenly feel like standing in a tea chest and singing "O' Jerusalem"?
   (see Monty Python's "The Mattress Sketch" Oops! I meant "Dog Kennel Sketch")


    No ryhme but a bit of reason.

   "MeeK"(And if those feet in ancient times, walked upon England's mountains green . . .)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 05, 2008, 01:43:22 AM
"And if those feet in ancient times,
Walked upon England's mountains green",
They were webbed & I was plucked,
For eating beans {Of all the luck!},
Ignore this last line, which, by all accounts, ends, obscene!  :-*
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 05, 2008, 02:57:58 AM
A Major Compliment, ;D from Br'er MAURICE,
Humbles me; yet, I shan't desist, nor, decease,
From Limericks,
I get my kicks,
Devising Visions, of MONSTERDOM; my sole release!   

 ;D "But in order to rhyme like a pro see BARON TIMOTHEUS!" ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 06, 2008, 09:59:00 AM
'Tis, oft, been said, that: "HE'D BE BETTER OFF, DEAD!",  :'(
That, my life, a worthless joke, for the grave, is meant,  :-\
No more loaded weep-puns,  >:(
Nor, Diarrheal Limerick Runs,  :-[
Proof, positive, that: "THERE'S, ALWAYS, TOMB FOR IMPROVEMENT!"  ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 06, 2008, 10:48:00 AM
Before the Baron lets his spirit soar
and leaves his body lying stiff on the floor
Consider his continued contributions
even after this grim resolution
because death's never stopped Timotheus before
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 06, 2008, 12:20:38 PM
My thinking process may split my mind,
And my wit not far behind,
But it's good to see my two friends back to the grind,
For making limericks I always try to be kind,
Now and again I like them to be neatly lined,
So in the end I try to avoid being fined,
For all those I sometimes have maligned.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 06, 2008, 03:08:43 PM
"A limerick a day", MAURICE believes, "keeps the Baron at bay",
IVAN writ: {I saw} "his body lying stiff on the floor", just today!
That Olde WEREWOLF Blighter,
Must be a real GHOST-WRITER,
"Death's never stopped Timotheus before!" As Br'er IVAN might say!

... I suffer, from the same complex, that, LARRY TALBOT has: "I cannot die!"
Compound that, with the fact, that, electrolysis was a real waste of time & $...
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 06, 2008, 11:38:37 PM
The Baron as we know cannot die,
As his life is made up like slices from a pie,
Shiney things appeal to him like a magpie,
So ask him a question for he cannot lie,
As for his creature features in a contest he might tie,
When all is said and done he might cry Semper fie! 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 07, 2008, 07:17:54 AM
Two very funny fellows, were ABBOTT & COSTELLO,
Comedic timing; perfect! Even, when DRACULA said "HELLO!"
'Though, THE MONSTERS "Died",
'Twas, an uproarious Ride,
For, with THEIR last breath, their Laughter did BELLOW!

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 08, 2008, 03:49:38 PM
He embedded Silent Films, with his powerful demeanor,
Of Charismatic MONSTERS, did LON CHANEY, SENIOR;
Creating outstanding VAMPIRE and QUASIMODO,
MR. WU, MARINE, CLOWN and DESPERADO,
His Consummate Work: ERIK, THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 09, 2008, 08:18:36 PM
On Moonlight nights werewolves do prowl,
From the spine of a tree the hoot of an owl,
Grave diggers dig with the end of a trowel,
Voodoo worshippers dance with their fowl,
Vampires are seen with fangs that growl,
All of them together make beautiful music that can rock and howl.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 10, 2008, 12:45:28 AM
My TV screen kept "THEM", alive, all year,
FMOF, daily, refreshed my fascination & fear,
In the strange face, of the 1960's,
"THEY" simplified life's complexities,
Becoming "THEM", at HALLOWEEN, brought me great cheer!
----------------------------------
... Coming soon to an OCTOBER 31st, near YOU!  ;D
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 11, 2008, 09:55:17 PM
Ah, I'm back from the rim feeling a bit trim, but my place is safe with my friend Tim.



High above the opera stands the phantom with his cloak wind flapped,
Over the Paris skyline his mind just snapped,
His beloved has ruined his romance he mapped,
For in his caverns he could leave them trapped,
He could work on the chandelier and have it dropped,
Or he could tie rope for their necks to be lapped,
No, in the end it is he who gets slapped.
 


 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 11, 2008, 10:30:30 PM
Good to hear friend Maurice is back
Between him and Tim I am but a hack
my poetry is a bit unconventional
and my rhymes are, at best, rather questionable
But the worst is, that my participation is slack!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 11, 2008, 11:33:50 PM
Welcome my friend Ivan, I wish you all the best in your bright blue navy vest. So with the waves crest Iíll always enjoy your jests.



With scary monsters it is hard to retort,
For you know them with their growls and snort,
Even Abbot and Costello got to meet and they were tall and short,
But so long as you are armed with anti-monster gear nothing is a last resort.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 12, 2008, 04:12:22 PM
To My Dear World-Wide Brothers, MAURICE & IVAN,
... With convention plans, work and, sleep, I've been, remorsefully, delinquent, as to my on-line duties. I've composed this ode, to chronicle how the best laid plans, of mice & men, can, oft, be blown awaaaayyyyy!
``````````````````````````````````````````
Thanks, to the massive efforts, of IKE, Hurricane, insane,
Gas cost is, now, prohibitive, so, mayhap, I'll refrain,
From a trip, to Convention SCAREFEST;
Lexington, out-of-gas; now, a mess,
At least, for Limericks, I can, still, wrack my demented brain!
```````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 14, 2008, 06:25:00 AM
Ooohh!  :o My Beloved UMA FANG-MILY,
... The final crush, of Time, is, upon us! Steady, as she goes, &, Full-Speed, ahead!
``````````````````````````````````````````
September's weeks are, loudly, ticking, Ticking, TICKING,
Like, a detonation device, fatefully, its timer clicking,
OCTOBER is set, on Explosive Overload,
A real BLAST, you'll know, if, Truth, be told,
And, your taste, in BORIS KARLOFF, you'll indulge, in picking!
`````````````````````````````````````````````
... A LACK-OF-SHAME PLUG, for THE CLASSIC MOVIE MONSTER CON!  ;D
www.moviemonstercon.com

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 14, 2008, 02:16:42 PM
Well said baron, in the immortal words of Henry Frankenstein "It''s alive" and so are our posts.


It is always best to have a quick backward look,
Especially  if you're alone or by a brook,
You never know what lurks there or what nature has forsook,
Remember to carry your copy of the Myths and creatures book,
If this is not the case then be prepared for your life to be took,
Or like Crystal lake there is always one kook.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 15, 2008, 12:10:38 AM
A MONSTER KID must have, &, live, the ultimate Desire,
Rooms, full, of toys, mags & models, are required,
Please, don't call me a Liar,
For, I'm a famous VAMPIRE,
Who, after moving, to America, had his coffin, burned, in a FIRE!
{... WHO AM I? ... Hint: Not, Playing, with a Full Deck!}
{... And, try, to respond, in a Limerick-y fashion.}
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 15, 2008, 05:33:27 AM
Growing up in the 70s I wasn't quite right
I cheered for Dracula in LOVE AT FIRST BITE
I wanted Renfield to kill the film's hero
who's plots to 'save' his girl amounted to zero
when she and Drac both flew off in the night
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 15, 2008, 06:59:44 AM
The THING came from outer space
but if it touches you it could wear your face
Don't react to it in anger
if it's your doppleganger
Just quickly get out of the place
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 15, 2008, 08:51:14 AM
Hello to you both Tim and Ivan, it's so nice to have you back where you belong (Sorry about that Dolly).




To answer the good Baron's riddle,
Could it be somewhere around the middle,
As the U.S has a lot of swamp land,
We know that it is not the Mummy's hand,
The clue is that the female victim tried to diddle,
The Son of Dracula, while his coffin burnt he did not like Nero fiddle.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on September 15, 2008, 05:09:04 PM
I haven't been at this thread in a while
but it always brings a smile

Unfortunately I tend to get sick
reading poorly composed limericks

And as I sit and type this post
I feel my stomach begin to bloat

Excuse me please, I'm feeling ill
Get out of the way, I'm about to spew!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 15, 2008, 05:44:06 PM
There, once, was an Irishman, named MAURICE,
Who, poetically, rhymed words, like, HOMER, from GREECE,
With Classically rapt fascination,
He'd reach his thought's destination,
Amazing his readers, with his astute verbal GOLDEN FLEECE!
--------------------------------------------
... And, Yes! Dear Brother, SON OF DRACULA, it is!  ;D
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
```````````````````````````````
POSTS-CRYPT:
Brother TERRY, hope you feel better real soon!  :-* A kiss is as good as a spew! Although, a spew doth offer a warm meal!  ;)
Brother IVAN, charming recapitulations! 8)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 15, 2008, 06:30:20 PM
I bow to your wisdom Baron as I am flattered by your words, I thank you from my heart. Now who made that mess upon the floor?


As I've visited this post before,
This is the first time someone has left a spew,
I may come from a distant shore,
But putting words together is hard work, phew,
Thats why I always come back because it is something I adore.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 15, 2008, 06:44:28 PM
This oneís for you Terry, Mein General.

There was once a famous monster from Minneapolis,
Who tried very hard to topple us,
What he did not know was we came prepared from the neotropolis,
With our own bizarro Superman fresh out of Metropolis,
So now we can stand and limerick before the huge populace.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 18, 2008, 01:36:53 AM
There, once, was, in Minnesota, a GENERAL TERRY,  ;D
whose attempts, at Limericks, were, quite, SCARY,  :o
His couplets, all, RHYMED,  :D
At least, most, of the TIME,   :'(
As can be read, in this thread, where, said talent is BURIED!   ;)
````````````````````````````````````
... Sorry, that, I've been, for several days, M.I.A.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 18, 2008, 04:07:45 AM
There once was a Monster Kid from Minnesota
Who feared the Limmericks wouldn't meet their quota
but when he takes a quick look, he's
left tossing his cookies
To settle his stomache he should drink a soda
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 18, 2008, 12:45:30 PM
Ivan, I won't ask what you were doing in Elvira's bedroom. Next time wipe those big feet you left hairs all over the place, what were you doing NO don't answer that.

In Victorian times the lady would wade in her pantaloon,
Even though the water was deep and they filled up like a balloon,
The risk may have seemed great but that was too soon,
Now remember that this was the time of the silvery moon,
Having no fear she swam to far and became a meal for the creature in his beloved lagoon.
.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 18, 2008, 02:42:31 PM
No reflection, casts, He, in the mirror,
Yet, after sunset, the very visage, of fear,
On the wings, of the night,
He made, out, all right,
VLAD DRACULA drinks blood, like, it's beer!
---------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 18, 2008, 03:42:53 PM
Listen to them the children of the night,
What music they make when the Moon is full and bright,
Through darkest nights and oddly coloured light,
They are ready to do their work, which is fright,
Wolves howl and the deadly bat takes flight,
All is well in the World of monsters, as is there given right.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on September 18, 2008, 06:10:08 PM
Back in the thread after being sick
my head spinning from another bad limerick

Baron, Ivan, and TV Horror
all hack lyricists using Internet Explorer

Maybe my limericks aren't what they should be
still Eminem ain't got sh*t on me

I'm from the land of 10,000 lakes
back in this thread and raising the stakes

Peace out.
 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 19, 2008, 01:35:29 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... As CHARLES DICKENS, once, writ, unto his son: "This life is half made up, of Partings."
I'll post, as I have the time, about our staggering loss, of LINDA; yet, Champion, of our Limerick thread, as she was, I couldn't reserve any subject, save her, for this next offering, as follows:
````````````````````````````````````````````

Comrades, True, cannot be lost; they dwell, BEYOND,
Subtler, than ever, they continue, to respond,
Without our Beloved MEEK,
Our House doth seem, a little bleak,
But, Dear LINDA, BE, at PEACE, Thine Earthly battle, WON.

`````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY FRANCIS MEYER HERRON, BY GOD'S GRACE
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on September 19, 2008, 03:09:39 PM
Thank you Baron for that wonderful devotional to our beloved Meek. This thread ain't ever gonna be the same. :'(
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 19, 2008, 05:31:44 PM
I don't think anything about these forums will ever feel the same to me.  I only knew Linda through the UMA, but her influence will stay with us all for as long as we remain monster kids.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 19, 2008, 06:24:06 PM
To a dear and absent forum friend I salute you sweet Linda, God bless and take care of you. Maurice from Northern Ireland.


Our beloved Linda (Meek) Miller,
That most gentle and talented rose,
The light has dimmed and drawn to a close,
But on this forum her memory remains as a pillar,
Now is not the time to feel morose,
So celebrate her short life as she is in repose.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 19, 2008, 08:00:54 PM
Dear TERRY, ROBERT, IVAN, MAURICE & UMA FAMILY,
... I, too, met LINDA, at THE MONSTER BASH.
... Shy, yet, slyly Intuitive, she was/IS a most fascinating Person. We carried on a couple of convivial and pun-filled conversations; it was great, to meet the Being, whose postings, I'd enjoyed, so much. It was easy to see the vast Well-Spring, from which they came.
... She sent me the PHANTOM OF THE OPERA book, that, will aid me, in "capturing" ERIK, as, both, FRANKENSTEIN & DRACULA have been funneled through me. I am, ever, in her debt.
... And, as SCRIPTURE states: "Owe no one anything, except, a debt, of LOVE."
... This, I Believe; This, I Know:
... LINDA/MEEK: You are Living, EVERNOW, in LOVE DIVINE; Your heightened Knowledge, and, Love, of us, connects you, to us, still.
... May I be the first, to welcome your Presence, unseen, in The Unfathomable Mystery, of GOD, "Who holds all Creation together, in HIS Own Very BEING."
... BE, EVERNOW, a Prayer-Warrior, Of LOVE DIVINE; purposed, to act, with the same Merciful Tenderness, that, you showed, during your Earth-Life, on our behalf. PEACE, BE WITH YOU.
... TERRY, you are correct; this thread will never be the same.
... May it be Deepened, Hallowed, by  our Spiritual Awareness, of MEEK'S Dazzling Presence.   
---------------------------------------
MEEK WILL INHERIT THE HEAVENS...
---------------------------------------
LINDA was, on first glance, just another person,
Unassuming; one, of Iowa's best hidden Treasures;
Filled, like us, with a uniquely singular devotion,
To The CLASSIC MONSTERS, which gave her heart pleasure.

While Earth's fragile treasures beguiled her eye,
Her heart was, by far, too rich, to succumb,
She measured Reality, discerningly, wise,
Knowing, that, Life was, more, than its sum.

Another Great Soul, Awakening; Blessed;
Giving, from her heart, effortlessly,
She was a Kaleidoscope, of Giftedness,
Creating Heaven, on Earth, her Being was Free.

She gladdened every Life, whom, she touched,
With her intellect, jovial wit and generosity,
For her endless giving, her Reward is, NOW, Much,
Much, more, than she could imagine, that, IT could BE.

Our grief, in MEEK'S passing, is, only, fitting and true,
Beneath our sorrow, our Love heals us, in THE UNION, past Time,   
We know, that, she's, EVERNOW, by LOVE DIVINE, Re-Newed,
Awaiting, our Infinite Meeting, in Undying Glory, Sublime.
-------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY FRANCIS MEYER HERRON, BY GOD'S GRACE
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 20, 2008, 07:16:20 AM
My Beloved Family,
... So, onward, we go... MEEK would've wanted us to do this.
... In Honour, of her, to whom this curious feast meant so much:
`````````````````````````````````````````````
THE MONSTERS were vexed; most, of them, cried,
As word reached their ears, that Dear MEEK had died,
"Our light shines through film,
And, now, is quite dim,
Compared, to MEEK'S New Glory, as LOVE trumps our pride."
``````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on September 20, 2008, 08:20:52 AM
Baron, your words bring comfort to a heavy heart. Thank you my friend. I needed that.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 20, 2008, 09:29:23 AM
TERRY,
... GOD Bless you, my Dear Brother; We keep our eyes, on the imperishable prize.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 21, 2008, 07:11:32 AM
Conventions, by nature, are a Human invention,
So, celebrating CLASSIC MONSTERS may seem an odd intention,
Yet, they remind us, of us,
From our depths, to our crust,
Via our free will, to choose Good, or, evil, as our Identity Retention.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 21, 2008, 07:38:08 PM
I've been unsure that I want to continue
Linda's passing has left a pall on this venue
But though I still grieve
her spirit shall never leave
And our rhymes here can serve as a tribute
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on September 21, 2008, 09:47:03 PM
Well said Ivan. Well said. We owe it to Linda to continue with these limericks. She would have it no other way.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 22, 2008, 02:00:43 PM
Today, 'tis the Autumnal Equinox, the first day, of Fall,
Summer is fleeting, o'er green leaves, comes the pall,
Of Death, certain & inescapable,
Earth's Life-cycles, unstable,
Yet, as Autumn leaves, to die, beautifully, is the wish, of, us, all.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 23, 2008, 12:51:18 AM
TERRY'S birthday lands, on this First day, of Fall,  :o
A laugh, by contrast, as he's so young and all,  ::)
His face may be scarred,  :'(
But, he's, really, 5-STAR,  ;)
And, in GENERAL, 'tis agreed, that, he's quite, "ON THE BALL!"  ;D

... HAPPY BIRTHDAY, yet, again, Dear FRIEND, &, B.G.G., Many, Many More!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 23, 2008, 01:30:11 PM
E-GAD, KERRY,
... You & The Crew, have done it, AGAIN!
------------------------------------------------
I've just got, to Praise MONSTER KID MAGAZINE, NUMBER SEVEN,
It fills my Lucky, Happy Heart, like, really GOOD LEAVEN,
Due, to KERRY GAMMILL & Company's Faithful Attention,
It deserves 1st, 2nd & 3rd Place, as well as Honourable Mention,
The Bliss, of which, keeps me, in the Realm, of MONSTER KID HEAVEN!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 24, 2008, 09:25:12 PM
There, once, was a Doctor, named JEKYLL,
Whom, "Better Living, Through Chemistry", did pickle,
It changed him, from deep inside,
All, the way, out, to his HYDE,
Then, changed him, back, again,... HOW FICKLE!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 25, 2008, 05:07:52 AM
There once was a creature from the Black Lagoon
Who loved to swim by the light of the moon
But while he lazed about on the beach
the Sun came and dried out the Creach
Seems he fell asleep and didn't wake until noon.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 25, 2008, 01:05:10 PM
There is a MONSTER KID Sailor, named IVAN,  ;)
Whose deep MONSTER Limericks were THRIVIN';  ;D
He sent out these POSTS,  ::)
About MONSTERS & GHOSTS,  :o
Much, of which he'd seen, in his youth, at THE DRIVE-IN!  8)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: josie monster on September 25, 2008, 04:42:54 PM
 Just to remind evertone that tomorrow (Sept.26th) is a Special Monster Day:                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       
This wish comes from little ol' Josie
As well as the Universal Monster Army
You taught us to scream
To live the Monster dream
Happy Birthday to you John Zacherle
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: CreepysFan on September 26, 2008, 12:30:37 AM
Halloween is soon on the way
And the Werewolves are ready to bay
Show the classics this year
But they won't is my fear
Just keep Michael and Jason away
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 26, 2008, 06:12:08 PM
Freddy and Chucky may not be classics
but diss all the slashers and you may get your ass kicked
I have no love for Leatherface
Just give me Pinhead and Norman Bates
They helped to keep horror films fantastic
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 26, 2008, 10:20:24 PM
The older Classic Monster films are "a cut, above",
The "Slasher Flicks", with their knife-blade gloves,
Fiends, FREDDY, JASON & MICHEAL,
Owe a Great Debt, to UNIVERSAL,
Whose Supernatural Series gave us, all, MONSTERS, to Love!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on September 26, 2008, 10:36:41 PM
In honor of Zacherley's 90th Birthday today...

     A werewolf once tore his own hide
     To find out just what was inside....
     He ripped and he tore, til his hands ran with gore...
     But before he found out, HE DIED!
                                                          Happy Birthday, Zach
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 27, 2008, 06:49:43 AM
Dear Brother, GASPORT,
... I agree; on behalf, of THE UMA HORROR HOST Regiment, we extend our Grateful Salutations, to our Dear Olde DAD!
`````````````````````````````````````````````````

We Bless and Acknowledge ZACHERLEY, as "The TOPS"!   :D
Every HORROR HOST has the Right, to call him, "POPS"!   ::)
For being NINETY, he's awfully SPRY;   ;)
One look, at him, tells you, WHY,   :o
He Celebrates Life, with his wide smile, that, never STOPS!   ;D

``````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: CreepysFan on September 27, 2008, 11:06:03 AM
Didn't listen to what the other kid's say
Just had to grow up my own way
An outcast little fiend
For reading Creepy magazine
And Monsters are still my best friends today
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 27, 2008, 06:11:59 PM
Spent the day, at SAM'S, in FRANKENSTEIN Make-Up,
Whene'er I do, I'm pleased, by a most pleasant wake-up,
Most young kids, of Today,
Know who I am, right away,
When The Day comes, our MONSTER KID Banner they'll take up!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 28, 2008, 08:30:05 AM
One, of my dearest friends, is THE WEREWOLF OF LONDON,   ;D
You'd know him, most days, as the Good Doctor, GLENDON,   ::)
Yet, when the FULL MOON holds SWAY,   :o
You'd, best, get, out, of HIS WAY,    >:(
Lest, THE BEAST claim you, as Victim & your life, be ENDIN'.   :'(
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
... Yes; a variable re-tread... expanded beginning, different ending...
... Closer, to WARREN ZEVON'S Song, i.e: "he'll rip your lungs out, Jim!"
``````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 28, 2008, 09:09:06 PM
PAUL NEWMAN was human, and, still, brightly, shone,
The Star, of many movies, his craft, of Acting, to hone,
Yet, to him, there was, much, more,
His generous Charities, galore,
Making Heaven, on Earth, he was quite near, when GOD called him HOME!
```````````````````````````````````````
PAUL NEWMAN, REST IN PEACE!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMOTHY, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 30, 2008, 01:18:15 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Priming the pump, on this final day, o' September!
----------------------------------------------------------

  Tomorrow begins the Month, called OCTOBER,
  When WERE-WOLVES become a MAN, called DOBER,
  They live, in the BOG,
  And, eat, like, a HOG,
  Those AQUALUNG hobos, who ain't always SOBER!

----------------------------------------------------------
HAPPY HALLOWEEN... All Month, Long!  ;D
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 30, 2008, 03:02:35 PM
September has ushered in the Fall
The season I look forward to most; don't we all?
Now October is here
We have reason to cheer
And if it's werewolves you fear, give me a call
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 04, 2008, 07:16:52 AM
MARLENA DIETRICH, oft,  said: "IVAN, TO BE ALONE!"
THE UMA, in its own wise way, always, carries a CLONE,
IVAN'S Posts have brought him FAME,
So, LILI MARLENE wasn't hip, to his GAME,
Or, take the time , to ring him up, on the TELEPHONE!
```````````````````````````````````````````
... Despite a too-busy life, October Greetings, to all, especially, Dear Brothers, IVAN & MAURICE!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 05, 2008, 12:09:06 AM
Dear friends I have been very busy on a few projects but now I have returned like an ill prepared meal.  Happy Horrorween season to my friends on the forum and a personal thank you to my mentor the baron and his cubling Ivan.


I hold this forum to my heart most dear,
Among it's threads are a lot of friends I try to adhere,
My limerick's might fall short but have no fear,
With my return I'm now in full throttle gear.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 05, 2008, 05:12:46 AM
With the season of the witch comes costumes and candy
And stores start selling monster swag, which is handy
But don't pity me
though I'll be out to sea
We're having a haunted house and costume contest, which is dandy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 05, 2008, 07:15:13 AM
A LONG DIN-DIN, WITH RENFIELD
-----------------------------------------
Or: WHAT'S ALL THIS BUZZ ABOUT?!
````````````````````````````````
IVAN'S post #514 mirrors the undisputed and unconscionable, FACT,
That, this Limerick Thread's been read 5414 times, so, "TAKE A CRACK",
At composing your own odd Ode, to THE MONSTERS' "CLASS ACT";
Requires, less, than, HALF, of a WIT, &, even, {isn't it obvious? ;)} far less, TACT,
Proving, that, vinegar, laced, with honey, many more FLIES shall ATTRACT!
`````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 05, 2008, 12:15:41 PM
Tim and Maurice are perfect examples
of monster limericks; just check out their samples
No need to wait for inspiration
Quantity, not quality, is my only qualification
Our poems may be lousy, but our poetry's ample
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on October 05, 2008, 12:36:57 PM
Thank you my friends for an incredible thread
I echo all that Brother Timothy said

Ti's thread is indeed popular and very well read
If only more members would post here instead

* Jump into the mix, and take a stab at composing your own limerick.

It's fun, it's relaxing, it's creative, and it's safe for the whole family!

Examino Everynow .. or whatever the Baron says.  ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on October 05, 2008, 12:42:59 PM
Seriously though folks. If this keeps up, we'll have to publish a new book entitled "WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead!"

A complete study in nonsensical and commonsensical prose. A collection featuring the best of!

A UMA exclusive!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 05, 2008, 12:56:43 PM
Seriously though folks. If this keeps up, we'll have to publish a new book entitled "WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead!"

A complete study in nonsensical and commonsensical prose. A collection featuring the best of!

A UMA exclusive!

A book of our poetry?  Surely you jest!
With so many entries, what would pass the test?
You'd have to be squirrelly
(and yes, I called you 'Shirley')
To think any of these verses could be best!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Auntie Maim on October 05, 2008, 01:56:53 PM
I am glad to join the fold
of monsters, ghosts and goblins bold
to discuss our loves, our interests, our lives
Lagosi,  Korloff and Dr. Phibes
while shaking off my mental mold.

(Thanks for the board!)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 05, 2008, 02:31:53 PM
The call has been given, verses ready at ten paces or less. These are hard times but a bad pun will enlighten the fun or my name is not TV horror.... king of the old rerun. 


If you enjoy horror from New York to Maine,
There are not many flaws for you to blame,
So if you don't post your reasons must be lame,
A hearty welcome to our new member Auntie Maim,
And please feel free to post more of the same.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 05, 2008, 02:42:16 PM
Welcome to the Army, Auntie Maim
We got your first ever post here to claim
As a tribute to the horror movie
Your limerick is pretty groovy
And now we'll always remember your name
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 05, 2008, 03:58:46 PM
24 pages, of LIMERICK Stages, where we stretch, beyond our feeble REACH,
Oft, too low, yet, still, Soap-boxes, upon which, we UMA Punsters do PREACH;
GEN'L TERRY Jumps, in the GAME;
Now, with PRAISE, &, not, BLAME!
Will we, ever, be the same, or, with our dear AUNTIE MAIM, claim: LIFE'S A BEACH!
````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on October 06, 2008, 08:07:51 AM
the sky is drab and long
a lone bird flies overhead

mechanics of the day's routine begin
a daily performance exhausted by repetition

it's Monday again

******************

P.S. Do these things have to rhyme?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 06, 2008, 12:30:54 PM
the sky is drab and long
a lone bird flies overhead

mechanics of the day's routine begin
a daily performance exhausted by repetition

it's Monday again

******************

P.S. Do these things have to rhyme?

If you are trying to make a genuine LIMERICK
There's a particular pattern; that's the trick
The first two lines rhyme with each other
And the next two lines make up another
But the fifth rhymes with the first two to stick

Luckily, we don't stand on formality
We'll take any kind of poem in its totality
You can rhyme if you want to
or wax prosaic in haiku
or just put lines together with no regard for format or sequencing or even number of syllables
 ;)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 06, 2008, 06:10:42 PM
What's a syllable, is it a silly billy? Hell I just put one and one together until I am done (that rhymes). Thank you Ivan for that little class in how to limerick, now I may never post again as I've been caught out. Yes, I am a faker (I said faker O.K) I have no rules only a lot of useless words.

Universal monsters growl and groan,
But I can assure you that they're not alone,
Think of it as an education,
Monsters rule and are a constant vocation,
Now if I can work out if I'm a clone,
I'll be doubly happy because king Karloff will be on his throne.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: ramsey37 on October 07, 2008, 01:49:35 AM
Terry felt that he had to confess
That in female garb he used to dress
But his face was so scary,
And his armpits so hairy,
That on the floor I just made a big mess ;)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on October 07, 2008, 12:41:54 PM
I'm at my best when I'm in a dress
Face so scary? Surely you jest
Nylons and lipstick are blissful
Ramsey37 hates me because I'm beautiful  :-*
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 07, 2008, 11:55:02 PM
I fully support our general's double D's  for he is in good company for that see Norman Bates.

Aw, leave poor terry alone with his frilly dress,
For I imagine that he would make you guess,
I know for I have been at his behest,
So for Halloween make him your number one top invited guest.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 08, 2008, 04:10:53 AM
I wondered why our Famous Monster had such an androgynous name
Terry's not scary, but Larry or Mary would make Terry's gender too plain.
But if he's really a sweet transvestite
He could give all Transylvania a fright
If he's dressed as Norman's mom they'd all think him insane
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 08, 2008, 12:54:27 PM
Our FAMOUS MONSTER had such an ANN-drogynous mane, ::)
Terry's "Doo" was an integral part, of his Transsexual Fame, :o
His future waxed, very bright, 8)
Save, Waxing his legs took all night, >:(
He dresses, now, as NORMAN BATES' Mom; relief, from his General strain! ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 10, 2008, 12:13:02 AM
I'm not ashamed to admire this time of year,
For that I leave to others more normal to fear,
Ghosts and ghouls may brave the night,
Whereas cowboys and spacemen try as might,
So watch out for those that smirk and sneer,
This season of the witch Halloween, so give a great cheer.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 12, 2008, 02:45:49 PM
They may have came from outer space,
But how many more bug eyed monsters must we face,
I know that if ever I should meet one my heart would race,
And the only thought in my head would be a double quick pace,
Plus I'm to young to to die without a trace,
Maybe they've just broke down and are in need of a brace,
In that case  I'll just act out with a fine friendly grace.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 14, 2008, 09:22:23 PM
This PRODIGAL SON returns, to our unhallowed ROOST,  ;D
To inject a shot, of Humour; this thread, to BOOST,  ::)
Not, yet, ALL HALLOW'S E'EN,  :D
You, all, know, what I mean,  ;)
I'm, still, nasty & green; fearlessly immune, to being GOOSED!  :o
``````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 17, 2008, 01:42:22 PM
Once, I'm told, that, upon a MIDNIGHT, DREARY,  :o
E-GeORge, in his prime, looked, like NOAH BEERY,  ;)
Silence is GOLDEN,  :-X
So, is BILL HOLDEN,   :'(
This hand, I'll be foldin', lest you call RAY FERRY!  >:(
`````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 18, 2008, 12:26:21 AM
As everybody knows, the Baron knows best,
Monsters are good for you as are the rest,
He feels so proud that his buttons pop on his vest,
With being a horror host from his family crest,
There might be an odd time when he goes round beating his chest,
But we'll forgive him this little Trieste,
Because he represents this army from east to west.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 19, 2008, 08:04:20 AM
AN HOMAGE, TO OUR DEAR IRISH BROTHER, MAURICE
`````````````````````````````````````````
Such a plethora, of zany, mad, POETS, abound,
Running amok, upon The UMA'S unhallowed grounds,
You'll find it, impossible, to keep us, bound, gagged & quiet,
Because our discerning public just wouldn't buy it,
So, 'though, our Limerick earnings turn up, "Broke",
We, still, remain, the most understanding, of  Blokes;
We refuse, to let a little fact, like, no money, get us down!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 19, 2008, 08:18:50 AM
... We Now Return You, To Your Regular Programming...
```````````````````````````````````````````````
Page #25, on this Limerick thread, I have STARTED,
Noisy fanfare; hmmm, sounds, like, somebody FARTED,
Nearly, 6000 have READ 'EM,
This slop, that, we've FED 'EM,
Yet, they keep returning, for our "STAKE-IN-THE-HEART", ED!
`````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 19, 2008, 12:09:10 PM
Twenty-five pages of poetic rhyme
6000 must think we do this all the time
Our muses are actors of monsters
Like Bela, Boris, and the Lonsters
And we can either tell poems -- or act out pantomime
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 20, 2008, 01:06:49 PM
There, once, was a WOLF-MAN, who dwelt, on a ship,  ::)
His name, CRAZY IVAN; who could, not, "get a grip";  >:(
He went, out, of his MIME,  :o
He had lots, of Time,  8)
So, Limericks composed, blending poem & quip!  ;D
`````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 20, 2008, 01:20:18 PM
A BIRTHDAY BLESSING, to our Beloved MON-STAR, BELA LUGOSI,
He lives, in our hearts, where he finds it, quite, COZY,
Gone, since August, of 'Fifty-Six,
Yet, still, up, to his "Olde Tricks",
Like, sucking the blood, from that Batty NANCY PELOSI!
````````````````````````````````````````````````
*** Nothing Political meant, by this; The rhyme demanded it! ***
If anyone can compose a better last line, feel free! ;)
````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,   :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 21, 2008, 04:20:38 PM
My Birthday, October 23rd, is, just, 'round the corner;  :-[
For the 60th time - no, I don't need the Coroner,  >:(
Monsters keep me young,  ;D
Like YGOR, well hung,  :o
Too much rope, yet, I cope, as, both, latter & former!  8)
````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,    :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 22, 2008, 07:01:25 PM
60?  Say it ain't so!
You still have a long way to go
Some birthdays are seen as mixed blessings
But you must still be keeping them guessing
To look at you no one could know.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 23, 2008, 12:35:51 AM
My dear friend Tim, a hearty greeting from your Irish brother and fellow fan of the horror film. It is not a whim that I take to greet him for he is without doubt quite proper and trim.  All the best Baron.



The denizens of the dark may hold sway,
From ages old or too long to say,
One thing is certain our Tim's not old no way,
So I wish him well on this most joyous day,
Hopefully he'll have his fill from the birthday banquet tray.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 23, 2008, 02:30:31 PM
Baron or Herron  - is he Monster or Man?
Born just Timotheus, I'm your biggest fan -
Gliding through one more year
So much love shining clear
If it begs to be done Examinow EverCAN!
 HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIM! Many happy returns - (with no late fees)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 24, 2008, 03:50:46 AM
 ;D  I THANK YOU, EACH & ALL!  ;D
{IVAN, MAURICE & PACKY PAUL}
---------------------------------------
Life's Treasure is, truly, Family and Friends,
I am blessed, by your Love, without end,
To be, so, enriched,
Added a fever pitch,
To my birthday's meaning, as B.G.G. doth portend!
```````````````````````````````````````
... GOD Bless you, for these written celebrations, and, to our more silent FANG-MILY members, whom good thoughts & prayer have sent! Heaven on earth Lives, within my heart, for you!
````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,     :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 26, 2008, 08:30:50 AM
Night skies, of HALLOWEEN, again, approach,
Dire fires, of Imagination, begin, to encroach,
As Vampires & Monsters, abound,
Issuing, forth, from fertile ground,
Where they lurk, 24-7, like Atomic Cockroach!
`````````````````````````````````````
HAPPY HOOOOWWLLL-OWEEN, from CASTLE Von WOLFSTEIN!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BARON TIMOTHEUS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 26, 2008, 08:41:51 AM
DEAR GENERAL TERRY & UMA FANG-MILY,
... An auspicious {or, suspicious} occasion!  ::)
````````````````````````````````````
I have just noticed, and, must raise a TOAST,  :D
For, if numbers are correct, 'tis my 500th POST,  :o
They're, not, for the SQUEAMISH,  :-[
Mostly, "OFF-THE-BEAM"-ISH,  ;)
I've got 5 TRILLION, more, 'ere "I give, up, the GHOST"!  ;D
```````````````````````````````````````````
... do I get a raise in Rank?!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 28, 2008, 08:49:56 PM
I think that the Baron is looking a rise, if not in wages then rank wise. So if a vacant moderator post should arise, then he has my vote especially in that guise.


Misty nights are full of dread,
If you have kids then it's off with them to an early bed,
For the children of the night look for veins of blood red,
Care should be taken if you venture forth in a quick step tread,
Or these creatures will not stop until you are well bled,
Lets just hope that they've had fill and have been well fed.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 29, 2008, 07:14:20 AM
'Tis almost All Hallow's Eve night
When the decorum is truly a sight
May you all be good greeters
to this year's trick-or-treaters
And perhaps inspire a good fright

Happy Halloween!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 29, 2008, 08:11:35 PM

My ex-wife reveals to us that
Halloween means her best pointed hat.
Orange and black still remind her
that it's harder to find her
blending in with the other old bats.

MMWWAAAHAAHAHA!!!!




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 29, 2008, 08:39:17 PM
This Halloween I'll be all set,
my ghoul face will get them I bet.
They'll be swiftly retreating
when done Trick-or-Treating
I yell BOO! and it scares their pants wet!

HAP-HAPPITY-RAPPITY-SNAPPIEST OF HALLOWEENS MY FELLOW FIENDS!
GET LOTS OF CANDY AND WRECK YOUR DENTEENS
THE REST CAN BE THINE
BUT THE CLARK BARS BE MINE
THE FIRST IN A LONG TIME I'VE SEEN!


Happy Hallowdays!


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 30, 2008, 10:36:36 AM
Moving right along....
I look forward to this Trick-or-treat.
There's this bully who's not so discreet.
But I'll puncture his bag
and abscond with his swag
He'll be sorry he made fun of my sheet!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 31, 2008, 01:47:21 PM
Bowl of spooky candy things...
breeze on leaves on sidewalk sings.
I see the moon...
...very soon...
THERE! I heard the doorbell ring!

Trick or Treat !
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 31, 2008, 04:27:35 PM
I would much rather have a trick than a treat,
Now scaring the wits out of some helpless victim is some feat,
I should know for I have and it's great,
For I will be in the back of the cinema with a mask at my feet,
Nothing will give me more pleasure than seeing seeing someone jump from their seat.



Happy Halloween from the land of myths and legends, the emerald isle.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on November 01, 2008, 09:47:42 AM
"The Hangover"
Jack O Lantern's visage cracks,
spirit drowned in melted wax.
November one
I see the sun
Morning falls like gallows ax!

Out of our beds we silent creep
Fill robes pockets - last night's reap.
Breakfast bars -
Hershey and Mars
Sweet repast, while giants sleep!



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 01, 2008, 10:10:18 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Due, to Theatrical & work commitments, my time, upon the UMA threads, hath been, laxly, non-existent.
```````````````````````````````````````
    Thanks, to the usual crew, of UMA Limerick Felons,
    Who, in my absence, kept, up, their pun-ishing tellin's
    I enjoyed each morsel,
    From gill, to dorsel;
    From such fishy tales, with pride I'm swellin'!
{Of couse, this may be the results, from the ill-prepared BLOW-FISH, which I ate, at last night's repast!}
``````````````````````````````````````````

    ALL-HALLOWS'-E'EN, again, It's course hath run,
    With November 1st's Birth, o' ALL SAINTS' Sun,
    But, "you know, that, I would be a liar",
    Were I, to preach, that, JACK-O-LANTERN'S Fire,
    Extinguished, meant, that, our Unhallowed Night was done!

----------------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & THE MONSTER & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 01, 2008, 10:40:08 AM
The seasons change, Halloween gone
Monsters' time to leave the lawn
Over for another year
I cannot help but shed a tear
And turn a Uni classic on
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 02, 2008, 08:36:45 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
````````````````````````````````
Now, praise, we, FORRY ACKERMAN,
Beloved, for sharing his MONSTER PLAN,
We're, all, His Kids,
With curious Ids,
So, Thank GOD, for 4E's LONG LIFE-SPAN!
`````````````````````````````````
... My Prayers, too, are added, to all, of yours, for UNCLE FORRY'S continued Health & Well-Being, EVERNOW!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 02, 2008, 02:19:25 PM
Ackerman's FM was there from the start.
O.k it may not have been a great work of art,
But throughout the years it was always good for a pun,
Forry proved that the classic monsters were fun,
What I do know is that he served them up  a la carte.


 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 03, 2008, 04:46:41 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Our FORRY is, soon, to be Bourne, away, from this infinitesimally finite life, into the Birth, of The Grander Scope, of PURE BEING!
... The Absolute Freedom, of True Identity, with Unparalleled Awareness, Beyond, what any one, of us, can corporeally conceive, of, or, imagine.
... May, all, of the Love, held, long, within his marvelous, wonder-filled, Child-like Heart, prove him, True, to the only BEING, Worthy, of the NAME, of LOVE DIVINE, to Welcome Him, "HOME"!
... An Aulde CHRISTMAS Carol sang, to mind, with slightly changed, yet, specifically Prayerful Lyric.
````````````````````````````````````````
    GOD Rest Ye, FORRY ACKERMAN,
    Let, nothing, you dismay,
    Remember, you are Loved, by us,
    For your Soul, now, we pray,
    That, you may know HEAVEN'S Delights,
    And, THERE, EVERNOW, STAY!
    In GOD'S Abiding Mercy & Joy,
    Mercy & Joy,
    In GOD'S Abiding Mercy & Joy!
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 03, 2008, 08:17:00 PM
I've been somewhat unwilling to think about Uncle Forry's condition too much; losing him is literally losing THE monster kid.  Thank you Maurice and Tim for honoring him in a way I can't, not yet anyway.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 07, 2008, 03:22:14 PM
                THE BRIGHTER SIDE... IS MIRACLE.
               --------------------------------------
      Our Kith and Kin, UNCLE FORRY hath, long, brought us,
      About The CLASSIC MONSTERS, Beloved, he taught us,
      But, Life is, far, more,
      And, what's, in store,
      Past our finite world; LOVE'S LIFE, soon, will, Birth him; the Ultimate PLUS!
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 08, 2008, 09:22:11 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... Ah, November! Birth month, of BORIS, SARA, &, on November 24, 1916, our Beloved UNCLE FORRY! He is, still, with us, remaining, until the final note, of his Earthly Song. May he surpass this up-coming Birthday, with Flying Colours!
... Meanwhile, a new limerick, for this fallow season:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
     The HUNTER'S MOON sits, quite heavily, and, full,
     Upon the horizon, as if taking a blood-thirsty toll,
     It's countenance, Eerie,
     Signals, HOLIDAYS, Cheery,
     Yet, a thousand HALLOWEEN Memories, my brain, now, doth mull!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 08, 2008, 11:10:11 PM
 ;D HAPPY BELA-ted BIRTHDAY, UNIVERSAL MONSTER ARMY!!!   ;D
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A BIRTHDAY TOAST, to our FANG-MILY, THE DEAR OLDE UMA,   8)
Where CLASSIC MONSTER KIDS know, that, they can, happily, play,   :)
Difficult, to believe, that, it's, now, NUMBER SIX,   :o
I know, though, that, we'll, never, "call it quits",   ::)
For, our Love, of UNIVERSAL MONSTERS, will remain, as strong, as it is, today!  :-*
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 14, 2008, 02:01:58 PM
There, once, was a MONSTER KID, named, MAURICE,  8)
Who hailed, from IRELAND, and, owned THE GOLDEN FLEECE,  :o
Spotted, upon the Tram,  ;)
Wearing said Glowing RAM,  ;D
By ELVIRA & XENA, who fought, over who should give him a Keece... er, KISS! :-*
```````````````````````````````````
... Oh, Brother, Where Art Thou?!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 15, 2008, 06:45:16 AM
Another Beloved Brother, of my WEREWOLF Clan,
Is Our Maritime Servant, known, as CRAZY IVAN,
He gets my Vote,
That, whilst a-float,
He's THE WOLFMAN, Most Dapper, in his NAVY P-COAT!
`````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 16, 2008, 12:40:07 AM
There once was a poet named Tim
Whose poetic subjects were grim
With Phantoms and Creatures
among his fine features
the scariest discuss Maurice and Iv'in
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 16, 2008, 05:52:30 AM
Dear Brother IVAN,
... Spot on & Full MARX {GROUCHO, HARPO, CHICO, ZEPPO & GUMMO!}, Lad! ;D
````````````````````````````````````````````
Please, IV'IN, do not cuss, when discussing the Discus;
Such behaviour alarms the Feds; they might frisk us,
So, comply, as you let said Disc fly,
Up, and, as it wafts, across the sky,
Gets mistaken, for a UFO, or, a plate, of sausage & biscuits!
`````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 16, 2008, 06:20:41 AM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,           
```````````````````````````````````````````
   Please, discard the discourse, regarding discus,
   As a Limerick thread, it, just, barely, missed us,
   It went, over our heads,
   Made me wet the bed;
   So, I've fled, to "The Head", with some Triskets!
```````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 17, 2008, 08:25:39 PM
COUNT DRACULA arose, one moonlit night,
From his Crypt, filled, with unsettling fright;
"My victims' blood,
Of late, tastes, like mud,
I must, now, use mouthwash, after every bite."
`````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on November 17, 2008, 09:17:59 PM
Door open wide in dead of night,
Undead in refrigerator light.
"Before I leave
must Heinz retrieve,
I like some ketchup vare I bite!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 19, 2008, 09:52:22 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
````````````````````````````````````
I dearly love my Brother, PAUL, aka, PACKY,
He, with MEEK, began this thread, so tacky,
His input is vital,
His Limericks ignite all,
Fanning the Flames, of Creativity, by Cracky!
````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on November 19, 2008, 10:07:13 PM
No, Tim it is you that inspired -
when my limerick muscle got tired.
But in your praise I'm baskin
So in case you were askin,
When I need a press agent - you're hired!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 20, 2008, 02:54:24 PM
Dear Brother, PAUL:
```````````````````````````````````````````````````
For your kind Compliments, I thank you, PACKY,
Also, for the job lead; it'll keep me, "on TRACK"-Y,
It might create a Societal "Dent",
Like, SUPERMAN and CLARK KENT,
Raising Public Awareness, that, we, both, are, quite, WACKY!
```````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 21, 2008, 08:21:20 PM
                     A "GRIM" REMINDER...
                 -------------------------
  RENFIELD was his VAMPIRE MASTER'S "Keeper",
  Kept DRAC, safe, by day; worked, much cheaper,
  Than most; content, with FLIES,
  Boiled, in oil, they became "DWIGHT'S FRYES" {FRIES ;)}; 
  Lost his job, when DRAC introduced him, to "THE REAPER"!
```````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 21, 2008, 10:43:32 PM
I've been busy of late, but I see that  my friend Tim has been up to the gate, so I hope that I'm not to late., for me to share in his lonesome fate.   I have to confess that I do enjoy my friends  limericks, heres to many more puns both good and bad  in the years to come.


The Count when he got staked felt a pain that was sore,
It's always the way if one was to keep score,
The vampires may come in all shapes and sizes so its all of them that I adore,
I've even thought that the Count may even snore,
I do believe that its all the bloodletting and fear I like and not the overt  gore.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 22, 2008, 05:34:59 PM
WELCOME HOME, BROTHER MAURICE! Ye ha'e been missed!

```````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Cresting, upon us, very soon, our National Day, of THANKS-GIVING,
When we Bless, all, of our Dear Dead, &, Pray, for our Beloved Living;
Pledge, as Time runs its course,
To live, in LOVE, &, not, remorse,
For LIFE is a FEAST, of MIRACLE; Proof, of LOVE'S Constant Believing!
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 23, 2008, 08:06:54 AM
I cannot stand the hunters' guns
When they go off, I have to run
But my movements are jerky
I am just a turkey
So I'll probably wind up well done.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 23, 2008, 04:37:28 PM
How many hunters can you fit in a ship,
I don't know so keep quiet or I'll give you a fat lip,
Knowing our werewolf Ivan he'll soon give them the slip,
If he should see one then its a quick hop and a skip,
but if he's to slow then it will be more than his lid that will be flipped.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 24, 2008, 01:14:52 AM
There once was a ship in the Persian Gulf
that had among its crew a werewolf
To avoid getting thinner
it had Thanksgiving dinner
because hunting Marines is too tough
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 24, 2008, 03:53:23 PM
UNCLE FORRY has reached 92 years, young, today,
For his continued Health, we do, earnestly, pray,
He'll go, when he must,
Yet, in GOD, we trust,
That, until that Call comes, he'll happily stay!
````````````````````````````````````````
... Because, he knows he is LOVED, by so many MONSTER KIDS!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 25, 2008, 11:06:53 AM
I will join the Baron in wishing forry all the very best on his 92 birthday, long live the King.

Over the years we have listened to his puns,
But fear not there are more to follow,
So to Forry we give a salute of 21 guns,
Because he has reared us with monsters what a jolly good fellow.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 27, 2008, 07:41:31 AM
This Yearly Event forces Turkeys, to live, in Mortal Dread;
The Fowl-est, of Reasons, to cry:"OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!"
A Champion, they, direly, need,
To prevent this "Annual Bleed";
Mayhap I shall become Vegetarian, upon arising, from FEASTING... & BED!
-----------------------------------------------
... HAPPY EAT-&-SLEEP DAY, UMA!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 27, 2008, 02:38:38 PM
I may not celebrate thanksgiving but why miss the fun,
What I have learnt thoughout the years never miss a pun,
So if you agree I know a turkey when I see one,
And over the years I've seen some by the ton.


Happy thanksgiving to all my friends on the UMA forum.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 29, 2008, 09:09:13 AM
THE CLASSIC MONSTERS were The First, of their Cinematic Breed,
To fascinate & beguile us, in our Love, of the SILVER SCREEN!
Although, "Fashions" move, on,
How can we, ever, go, wrong,
Choosing BORIS, BELA, and LON, in our time, of "MONSTER-FIX" Need!
````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 30, 2008, 08:40:39 AM
     ~~~ A MONSTROUS BIT O' CHRISTMAS CHEER ~~~
     ---------------------------------------------------------
     Photos, I've seen: BORIS & BELA, as SANTA CLAUS,
     Career choices, quite, odd, yet, they broke no Laws;
     LON, SR, too, along, with our BELA,
     Were photographed, as That ONE FELLA,
     JESUS CHRIST, Who, by His Suffering, Atoned, for our flaws.
     ----------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on December 02, 2008, 12:32:42 AM
Lon Sr. and Bela as Messiah,
Their eyes turned up to the sky-ah.
What we need is a chorus,
Creighton, Glenn, and Boris,
as Angels We Have Heard on High-ah!

------------------------------------
Perry, Timmy's Friennn-dd!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on December 02, 2008, 10:16:24 AM

From the top Christmas star, to the last holly berry,
Season's greetings to you, actor Perry!
With monsters galore
Rushing in every door--
Hope your holiday's happily scary!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 02, 2008, 04:31:08 PM
Another of the Baron's friends has come to stay, so I bid you welcome friend Perry come what may.


In this season of good cheer,
You'll find good companionship most dear,
For even the monsters need a holiday or two,
Because Halloween is over and now Christmas must do,
So beware thy bane on the frosty lane ,
And eat drink and be merry for some weight to gain.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 03, 2008, 04:41:10 AM
    ~~~ WELCOME, BROTHER PERRY ~~~
------------------------------------------------------
I'm Blessed, that, our dear Brother, PERRY SHIELDS,
Took my invite, to incite our current Limerick yields,
Another fine member, of our FANG-MILY,
Not, just some nut, fallen, from the Tree,
Easily found, in L.A., or, mayhap, STRAWBERRY FIELDS!
------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 04, 2008, 05:30:22 PM
   ~~~ THE PLOT COAGULATES... er, THICKENS! ~~~
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
    In THE HOUSE OF DRACULA, THE WOLF MAN is cured,
    Thanks, to DR.EDLEMANN, who's reality is blurred,
    By COUNT DRACULA'S plot, so evil,
    That our good Doc, in murder, does revel,
    Until TALBOT spills the Doc's blood, which was, with DRAC'S, Transferred!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 04, 2008, 08:06:26 PM
We all know of the evil count Zaroff and his arrows from his quiver,
But did you know that he was not a bad sort for he fed his hounds on human liver,
Not to be outdone he provided his victims with a knife,
What he did not count on was McCrea finding a wife,
Leaving Zaroff dead and for us to go out with a shiver.   

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 06, 2008, 08:52:17 AM
*****************************************************

      'Tis said that this life is, merely, a Dress Rehearsal;
      That, in death, lives New Birth - a true Role Reversal;
      So, with UNCLE FORRY,
      A Never-Ending Story,
      Now, Living, he is, Beyond, the concept & name, of: "UNIVERSAL"!

*****************************************************
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 06, 2008, 11:02:06 PM
That one was great, Tim. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 07, 2008, 03:12:25 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
      Thanks, BROTHER IVAN; I'm Blessed, by your kind approval,
      As we Honour UNCLE FORRY, in a way, that, behooves, all,
      Via his word-play, of PUN,
      To share witty Limerick fun,
      As our Dearly Departed would laugh, &, say: "Aha! Business, as usual!"
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 07, 2008, 08:15:50 AM
  :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
     DR. FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER, helplessly, wept,
     At Love, revealed, and, not, hidden, kept;
     He learned, that, its cost,
     Might lead, to the Cross,
     Yet, let his Creator live, even, as he accepted his loss.
 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 08, 2008, 05:08:32 PM
Henry Frankenstein connected the electrodes high above the tower,
To see if he could find the secrets to life and death,
But all he brought forth was a creature of tremendous power,
With the horror realized by this monstrosity and its first breath,
Even a little child like Maria was not safe and their encounter turned sour.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 08, 2008, 05:23:14 PM
Unfettered he be, the Monster is still but a child.
When spurned by his father of course he went wild
His rampage was a hassle
But none learned at the castle
That the Monster was best when not riled.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 08, 2008, 09:28:36 PM
Dear ROCK 'N' ROLL UMA FANG-MILY,
... *Sigh* 28 years, later.....

 :'( ******************************************  :'(
 
        Another Fallen Friend/Hero, of, now, long, ago,
        Today, an Remembrance, of a Loved One, we know,
        "And, so, this is CHRISTMAS",
        But, without you, not, the same,
        GOD Rest you, JOHN LENNON, for helping us grow.
 
 :'( ******************************************  :'(
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on December 09, 2008, 11:17:50 AM
In Memory of Uncle Forry...

**********************************
The Ackermonster has left us now,
Let us all at once take a vow,
That his memory will live,
As we continue to give
New Monsterkids his sense of "wow."

**********************************

From your "nephew," Perry Shields
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 09, 2008, 03:16:50 PM
I'm still bummed; you know the reason
A pall has befallen this Yuletide season
Uncle Forry is gone
And I've yet to move on
But I can't quit the Army; that'd be treason!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 09, 2008, 10:53:42 PM
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
IVAN!... STILL BUMMED?! BROTHER, GIT OFFA YER ARSE,  >:(
UNCLE FORRY wouldn't want you, to keep your Soul sparse,  :(
HEAVEN, on Earth; JOY,  ;D
For, all, to see, Boy!  8)  8)  8)
He's tossed THE MONSTER TORCH, to you, so, take it... &, MARCH!  :-*
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 12, 2008, 09:07:26 PM
 ;D  **********************************************  ;D

        There, once, was a Merrie Season, called CHRISTMAS,
        When BORIS recorded THE GRINCH'S Crass Business;
        His Competition, many;
        He, still, won the EMMY,
        He's the PERFECT STAR, in our Hearts; PRESENT & PAST! 
 
;D  ***********************************************  ;D
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 13, 2008, 08:10:32 AM
    :'( *     R.I.P., BETTIE PAGE     * :'(
--------------------------------------------------------
There, once, was a HOTTIE, named BETTIE PAGE,
Her "Come hither" Pictures, for years, "All The Rage",
Sorrows, she went, through, so much,
Aged; with her past glories, lost touch,
Yet, she found GOD, and, now, He's turned her page.
---------------------------------------------------------
 :) REST, IN BLESSED PEACE, LIGHT & LOVE DIVINE. :)
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 14, 2008, 08:17:21 AM
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````
ARMAND TESLA had lost his soul, two hundred years, ago,
As a VAMPIRE, attained powers, which no human could know,
Turning the hapless ANDREAS,
Into his WEREWOLF Servant;
His evil, finally, blighted, reduced TESLA, to a putrescent pile, of GOO!
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 15, 2008, 04:18:09 AM
 ;) -------------------------------------------------------  ;)

      We, WEREWOLVES, are, by nature, quite, modest & shy,
      I've been one, for years; please, don't ask me, why,
      We're, quite, prim & proper,
      Even, when dining, on "a Copper",
      If you think this, truth, then, you've swallowed a lie!

 ;) -------------------------------------------------------  ;)

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 15, 2008, 07:07:46 AM
The Baron might like telling fibs
But most werewolves aren't nearly so glib.
Larry and Wally and I
Hate that so many must die.
Tim, ~burp~ can you pass me a rib?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 16, 2008, 04:37:07 PM
The Baron fibs
werewolves aren't so glib.
Larry, Wally & I
Hate so many must die.
Tim, ~burp~ you pass a rib?
--------------------------------------------------------------
{ IVAN - ~BURP~, indeed, Young WEREWOLF!
Why, I've passed a whole lot, more, than just a RIB!  ;)
Care, for an Acid-washed Rib-cage? }
--------------------------------------------------------------

BR'ER IVAN, YES! But, only, if you wear a BIB!
And, join me, as I sing, like, BARRY GIBB!
Falsetto BEE-GEES Howls,
Amid low-note growls,
And, between courses, a swig, from my DR. PIBB!

----------------------------------------------------------
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 16, 2008, 11:45:28 PM
Good day to you Baron and my friend Ivan, I hope that you cleaned up after your spicy rib fest there's nothing worse than slipping on all those inners !!! Have a great time at the holidays and keep yourselves safe.




Ah the Baron likes to tickle our rib,
And live not in a castle but a quite nice crib,
Thats the truth and not some made up fib,
And I know that he has a familiar called squid,
Who likes nothing better than biting the mailman Sid.,
If you don't believe me just ask his kid.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on December 17, 2008, 10:32:57 AM
This is HO HO HOrrible!

Buffy told Santa "Prepare!"
But the Vampires said "Not here to scare...
No need to defend you,
we're here to commend you -
we've never met a finer sleigher!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on December 17, 2008, 11:11:18 AM

One Carol that Wolfman repels
Christmas song makes him run for the hills.
"Ever since a young whelp, it
compels me - can't help it.
I just run when I hear SILVER Bells!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 17, 2008, 03:36:30 PM
 :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :-*

         A CHRISTMAS Theme, to our LIMERICK Treacle,
         Perfumes the "scent", of our DREK-ULA fecal,
         PACKY'S prose treats me right,
         In MAURICE & IVAN'S, I delight,
         Yet, our Plum Pudding Thruppence is LOVING FORRY & MEEK, all!

 :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :-*
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 17, 2008, 07:02:58 PM
Thank you Tiny Tim or I mean Baron Timothy as always it is a pleasure to read your posts, And I give you my personal hail and hearty blessing from here in the Emerald isle in this coming yuletide.



I have to agree Christmas is a time of reflection,
And the barons right to include both Meek and forry in subtraction,
So I can wish that we will have fine times again in the company we keep,
A twice told tale from Meek and a funny pun from forry gave us the fun instead of our sad weep,
That is what we will remember about them because that was their main attraction,
And we will always hold it dear with great affection.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 18, 2008, 06:35:28 PM
My Dear Brother, o' Faire EIRE, MAURICE,
... And, unto Thee, young Lad, A MERRIE CHRISTMAS, and, a Most HAPPY NEW YEAR!
... Equal Salutations, for unparalleled Bliss, issued, from CASTLE Von WOLFSTEIN, unto Thee & Thine!
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

        DRACULA awoke, December 24th, in his Castle crypt;
        He saw RED... then, a white beard, and, nearly, flipped!
        'Twas SANTA, bringing,
        Stakes & Crosses; singing,
        Hymns, about their respective Bosses, &, how The VAMPYR got gypped!

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 19, 2008, 07:33:03 PM
As always baron you have touched my heart, now get those grubby paws out of my chest. Have a good Christmas my friend eat drink and be merry or should that be eat the merry men? I'm not sure either way enjoy the hunt. 





Oh for the pursuit of my youth Miss Bettie Page,
What a wonderful gal she was and all the rage,
I know that some members may not have much to gauge,
But she such was a lovey woman for the eyes to engage,
take my word for it as I'm wise and known as something of a sage,
She will always be remembered even into some future age.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 20, 2008, 01:57:36 AM
Majel has passed; reuinited with Gene
Heaven's become the biggest sci-fi fandom scene
Her voice went where no man went before
Now the crew members will here it no more
But their legacies remain, the next gen will soon be seen
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 20, 2008, 02:12:00 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MIY,
... A bitter-sweet Blessing, MAJEL'S Demise; freed, of her earthly suffering; re-united, with GENE!
... GOD'S Peace & Love, Keep Them, EVERNOW!

<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>

                          Amongst my Relics, which I most Treasure:
                          GENE & Me {in all my SPOCK Splendour},
                          Photos, from a more innocent time,
                          A Gift, unexpected, and, most sublime,
                          EVERNOW, the Joy, of Remembered Pleasure!

<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 22, 2008, 08:59:51 PM
             ***   THE CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF   ***
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

         The hideous madness begins, with the full moon's rise,
         The terror, beyond words, which he's grown, to despise,
         His teeth transform, into fangs,
         His mouth elongates, into jaws,
         Bestial heart, afire, with blood-lust, tunes, out, the innocent cries!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 22, 2008, 09:01:20 PM
RESERVED, FOR NEXT LIMERICK!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 24, 2008, 07:41:43 AM
The moonless sky glows with the star's light
and gives Vasaria's monsters pause, in mid-fight
Larry, the Monster, and Drac
call a truce to their three-fold attack
to join carolers singing Silent Night

SCARY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW FEAR!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 26, 2008, 05:11:18 AM
 :) ***  :D ***  ;D ***  :D ***  :)

Whilst TERRY offers a SURLY beer,
We, all, get high, on YULETIDE Cheer,
In CHRISTMAS, bask,
Ere we begin our task,
Haunted, by The Ghost, of This NEW YEAR!

 :) ***  :D ***  ;D ***  :D ***  :)

A MERRIE CHRISTMAS; HAPPIEST, of HOLIDAYS & A BLESSED NEW YEAR, To ALL!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 28, 2008, 10:06:08 PM
DEAR UMA FANG-MILY,
... Ahhhh, A.D. 2009 Soon Approacheth! :o

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

           "Out, with the Olde, and, in, with the New",
           Quoth THE MUMMY, quaffing TANA LEAF brew,
           "ANANKA'S a withered PRUNE!"
           "ELVIRA! Va-Va-Va-VA-VOOM!"
           KHARIS' choice; a MUMMY-LOVER, with a Talent, or, TWO!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 29, 2008, 04:42:14 AM
*************************************************

        Comrades, Dear; 'tis, with grim determination,   :o
        That, I plod, on, towards a glorious destination;   :-*
        These fruits, labourious,  :'(
        O' pithy remarks, Arborious,  ;)
        A veritable Limerick Tree, for our FANG-MILY'S elation!  ;D

*************************************************
... HAPPIEST, of HOLIDAYS & A BLESSED NEW YEAR, To ALL!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on December 29, 2008, 12:54:22 PM
This force is sucking at me
something that I cannot see.
though the lights are still on,
all the presents are gone -
there's a vacuum under my tree!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 29, 2008, 09:27:03 PM
Dear PACKY PAUL,
... Thank you, for your charming present! &, for keeping ye Limerick Faith!
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
 
                 My very Beloved UMA Brother, ST. PACKY PAUL,
                  A CHRISTMAS Gift sent; well done, 'tho' quite small,
                  DRACULA and WOLF MAN,
                  Hand-painted, by a True Fan,
                  Adds, much, to my Collection, as LOVE trumps all!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 30, 2008, 03:26:52 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... "Fast away, the olde year passes,
     Fa-la-la-la-la-la, lalala;
     Save us all from toxic gases,
     Fa-la-la-la-la, La, la, la, laaaahhh! ;)
````````````````````````````````````````````
       *** GOD BLESS THE AULDE; GOD BLESS THE NEW! ***
              {'Cos, me, like, HIM, doth LOVE, all, o' YOU!}
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
        BORIS & BELA lived, now, what seems, a long time, ago,
        Despite the distant years, 'tis, EVERNOW, "On with the Show",
        Shouldst be no surprise,
        Since, "LOVE Never Dies!"
        For, They live, in our Hearts, and, still, help us, to grow!
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on December 30, 2008, 03:39:07 PM
At work, surrounded, yet alone
ignoring email and my phone.
from cube an aroma
my Frankenstein coma -
I'm in a New Years MONSTER ZONE
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 30, 2008, 03:51:02 PM
Dear Brother, PAUL & UMA FANG-MILY,
************************************************************

                This instant expression, o' our Limerick profession,
                PACKY PAUL'S latest input, a Monstrous connection,
                Which brightens my day,
                Whilst the sun shines, make hay!
                Because, after dark, I must work, &, work, be Perfection!

************************************************************
                                                          Translation:
... For the next 2 days, I'm working twelve hour shifts... Mid-night, to Noon! Makes me feel, almost, VAMPIRIC!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on December 31, 2008, 03:11:52 PM
Aaaah
 
The last afternoon of 08
no moment again shares it's fate.
Except my invention
of another dimension
where time is a little bit late.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 31, 2008, 03:48:06 PM
Greetings to my limerick friends, the Baron Ivan Packy and Terry we all have a mission to please so lets start the new year with a smile or two.   




Out with the old in with the new,
While I've been a member of this crew,
Who would know that I've made friends anew,
And that the forums fondness has all but grew,
So this coming new year I toast those brave few.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 31, 2008, 07:14:02 PM
Dearest UMA FANG-MILY,
... Especially, my Stalwart Limerick Comrades, IVAN, MAURICE, PACKY PAUL, ELDER ROBERT, & GENERAL TERRY,
... May your NEW YEAR be Safe, Blessed, and Happy... even, JOYOUS, for you, and, all, of those, whom you hold dear!
... May LOVE Be Triumphant, With-IN You, EVERNOW!
---------------------------------------------------------------------

      Brave, we must be, to face this New Year;
      Bravery abounds, as you've read, all, that's here,
      Of Joy & Great Loss, week, by week,
      R.I.P., BELOVEDS, FORRY & MEEK,
      My Prayer, for us, Here, in Time, is LOVE, untainted, by fear!
 
----------------------------------------------------------------------

      Again, NEW YEAR'S EVE; I find it, hard, to believe,  :o
      That Time runs, so fast, without reprieve;  :'(
      AD 2008 - BLESSING, yet, GONE,  :(
      AD 2009; NOW, about, to Dawn,  ::)
      With our UMA FANG-MILY {+ BORIS, BELA & LON} A JOY, TO CONCEIVE!  :-*

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 01, 2009, 05:23:16 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

                 There, once, was a year, which is, now, called 2009,
                 Most likely, in China, 'tis "THE YEAR OF THE SWINE";
                 So, A BABY-BACK RIB-IN,
                 Could win the BLUE RIBBON,
                 &, no doubt, EUELL GIBBONS would lose, to FRANKENSTEIN!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & ROAST SUCKLING PIG, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 03, 2009, 03:40:41 PM
Beloved UMA FANG-MILY,
*******************************************************

                Cresting, through this first New Year's week,
                I continue, to confess, being a MONSTER KID Freak,
                Here, I find a True "HOME",
                To write Limerick Po'ms,
                And, enjoy, how your Patience, "turns the other cheek"!

*******************************************************
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 04, 2009, 03:33:53 PM
As we welcome 2009
I think of the year left behind
When I saw the new "Death Race"
with a mask on the face
of a driver, known only as "Frankenstein".

Oh yeah, and I'm online again.  Yay!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 04, 2009, 06:11:32 PM
 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)

                  BR'ER IVAN; 'tis good, m'Lad, to have you back,
                  I'd rather have you, here, than, dear olde DRAC;
                  With NEW YEAR, here,
                  I raise, in Toast, my Beer,
                  Proclaiming our Friendship, with Limerick crack! 

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 05, 2009, 12:59:31 PM
Thanks, Baron; it feels good to return
And reflect on the past that we've learned
Universal will stall
Talbot's curtain call
till they're sure the profits will get turned
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 05, 2009, 07:22:44 PM
Nice work, IVAN!
... Thanks, for chiming in... I was getting lonely!  :'(

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o

            DRACULA said, to his olde Friend, FRANK,
            "I vas, here, first; made UNIVERSAL its bank;
            Den, alongk you came,
            Life vas nefer der same,
            But, Ve started a cycle, so, you haf my Thanks!"

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 06, 2009, 02:59:58 AM
Though Dracula may lay his claim
On starting Universal's monster fame,
Lon Chaney played a part
in giving the genre its start
In the Hunchback of Notre Dame
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 06, 2009, 07:05:14 PM
 :) **************************************************  :)

         Dear LON, SR.; IVAN, Thou wert, quite, "on target", &, right;
         To chime, in, with that Truth, {'twas my blind over-sight},
         QUASIMODO & poor MAD ERIK,
         Two, of my Favourite "Freaks";
         Those Silents speak, loudly, in the brightest Bright Light!

 :) **************************************************  :)
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: M.A.N. on January 06, 2009, 08:48:07 PM
Here goes,

Inspiration:

Never moon a Werewolf- Hooters Hand Wipe Wrapper, 2008

Limerick:


Mooning Werewolves


Careful be at night
When there's no moon in sight
And you'd figure to drop your drawers
Heavens forbid the horrors
For the ones you mean to moon
Werewolves they be devouring you soon


from the Very Non-Irish Comic Book Poet,

Juan
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 06, 2009, 09:30:32 PM
Dear Brother, JUAN,
... Sage advice, Laddie, sage advice! Rump tastes better, with a sage dressing!
... And, WELCOME, to our un-howl-l-l-load crypt, o' Limerick Doo- Doo!
... Your contribution, to "the pot", is greatly appreciated!
... You da M.A.N.!  ;)
... This adaptation, of your epic telling, is the lighter side, of a darker subject:

                    Mooning Werewolves
                   ------------------------
Careful be, each night, when the full moon is brighter,
For, to drop your drawers, amid Werewolf blighters;
Heaving morbid unspeakable horrors,
Those lonely ones, upon the moors;
Such Werewolves might prove, to be Lovers... not, fighters!


... Join in, anytime... full moon, or, no!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & SGT. WOLFSTEIN'S LONELY WEREWOLF HEARTS CLUB BAND!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 07, 2009, 07:18:48 PM
DEAR GENERAL TERRY & UMA FANG-MILY,
... WOWSERS! Exquisite re-shuffling of the various departments!
... Navigationally super-friendly! Subjects, I never knew existed, due, to my limited access time! THANKS!!!
 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)

           THE UMA - Ahhhh! Such great, continuous BLISS!  ;D
           Just signing in is disarming; such a Loving Kiss!  :-*
           Blessedly, ever-new & ever-changing,  :o
           Contents, that are mind deranging,  ::)
           That, EVERNOW, are "Spot-On Target"; never, hit, or, miss! 8)

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.       
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on January 07, 2009, 07:37:40 PM
Thanks Baron! I gotta get back in the saddle here at this thread and start bustin' out a few rhymes. This thread is one of my favorites.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 07, 2009, 09:49:27 PM
Dearest Brother, FMOFMPLS:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
            Aye, Gen'l TERRY; Ye gotta get, back, in ye saddle,
            Here, at this thread; ne'er, more, to skeedaddle;
            Start bustin' out rhymes,
            Commit Limerick crimes,
            Use this thread, {one, o' Thy favorites} our arses, to paddle!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on January 08, 2009, 01:24:37 PM
At work and bored
of this hideous hoard.
I might
just write
of back pain abhored:

The belltower of Notre Dame was shakin -
The pealing was eardrum breakin -
cuz when he hurts his back
let me tell ya Mack
That's a whole lotta achin bacon


ok back to the variance report oh goodie



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on January 08, 2009, 05:05:47 PM
Well then The Creature caught her
and took her underwater.
The Lungfish guy
thought her a fry
and had always wanted a daughter
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 08, 2009, 07:22:45 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

         The jovial return, of Br'er PACKY, is, ever, so PLEASANT,
         He's no Royal Pain, nor, even, simple-minded PEASANT;
         He started this ILL-lustrious THREAD,
         So, if, he's, indeed, out, of his HEAD,
         Why GROUSE, all, you TURKEYS, whilst we dine, on PHEASANT?!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 10, 2009, 08:01:46 AM
 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)

                     There, once, was a MONSTER, named GENERAL TERRY,  :o
                     Who started an ARMY, of THE UNDEAD, and, UNBURIED,  ::)
                     The Troops didn't stink,  ;D
                     Yet, left dirt, in the sink,  >:(
                     So, THE GENERAL cleans, up, our mess - Our GOOD FAIRY!  :-*

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 10, 2009, 09:21:34 AM
Terry's no fairy, I'd guess
Just because he eats in the General Mess
But when this place gets untidy,
he's been known to get flighty
And that's his right; he's in charge... more or less
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 10, 2009, 03:12:16 PM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
         GEN. TERRY: "Fey", you say? Nay, 'twas, no intent, meant, to bother,
         Nor, did I, mean, to imply, such, for he's among my dearest Brothers!
         'Twas a compliment, meant,
         Until, waaayyy South, it went,
         Had my rhyme, had the time, I'd have writ: Our GOOD FAIRY GODFATHER!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 10, 2009, 11:27:18 PM
I have been some what remiss of late for I've had a lot on my plate but one thing can be said I'm never late for a date.




Ah the Baron's wit knows no bounds,
For he is always up and doing the rounds,
He has to be careful for werewolves are no ones clowns,
So along through the forest he leaps and bounds free from all those nasty frows,
Then the villagers better watch out and stick to their towns.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 11, 2009, 06:53:12 AM

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

                  There is, once, more, a FRIEND, known, as TV HORROR,
                  He may like, to sleep; but, he, sure, ain't no SCHNORRER,
                  MAURICE, he is called;
                  Don't know, if, he's bald,
                  Yet, without his Presence, our Thread would be POORER!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 11, 2009, 11:21:37 AM
Timmy and Terry and Packy, Maurice
I fear that one day our limmericks may cease
We've 'bout used every word
that I know or have heard
Out of rhymes, this Army may soon know peace
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 11, 2009, 06:07:19 PM
 :o   ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o

            A year shall it be, Br'er IVAN, this March 17th, you see,  :o
            In Honour, of MEEK, we've decided, to "bide a wee";  ::)
            As a Leprechawn, True,  ;D
            {I count you, as one, too!}  ;D ;D
            We might "Pull The Plug", on this Limerick thread, or, not; we'll see!  :-*  :'(   ;)

    `````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 11, 2009, 09:25:02 PM
What villian has plans afoot to end our pun, make my day and let him run, for spoiling our much needed fun.   On aside note Baron, no I'm not bald yet but I will hit the fifty mark by the end of this month. So that means that with my two minds as one, I have a while to go yet. Also Ivan is afraid of running out of words that rhyme but as we all know they are worth every dime! 



What's this I hear,
Surely you jest,
An end to our limericks I fear,
I just hope that you want to digrest,
Come St Patricks day I will shed a tear,
For our homely thread will surely die this year.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 12, 2009, 07:22:35 PM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,

 :)    ;)    :D    ;D    8)    ::)    8)    ;D    :D    ;)    :)    ;)    :D    ;D   8)    ::)

     Thou mayest rely, upon this: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MAURICE;
     'Though, Thy dome be spotty, may Thine hair increase,
     May the mental manure, o' Thy Limerick puns,
     Supercede, upon Thy noggin, ye hair, upon Thy buns;
     Aided, by Thy wit, expressed, Thy scalp, with Health, quite greased!

 :)    ;)    :D    ;D    8)    ::)    8)    ;D    :D    ;)    :)    ;)    :D    ;D    8)   ::)

                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 12, 2009, 08:31:55 PM
I thank ye Tim in advance of my coming of age,
And I'll take into account all that you've said upon this page,
With these words coming from such a wise sage,
now I know that I'll be all the rage.





Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 13, 2009, 02:29:35 AM
I too want to see Maurice Celebrate
The fact he's survived for so long is just great!
Though he be of two minds
The forum will be fine
As his poetry should illustrate
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 13, 2009, 08:35:44 PM
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

                 Bros. IVAN & MAURICE, I am, never, disappointed,
                 By your contributions; they seem quite anointed,
                 Of MONSTER & GHOULS,
                 Of MADMEN & FOOLES,
                 'Tho' SHAKESPEARE might tell you, your WITCHES be "arointed!"

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 13, 2009, 10:30:23 PM
Once again I'm delighted at my friend's the Baron and Ivan  they are such a joy as I reach fifty, oh boy!!!!

I do believe that my eyebrows and ears have got hairier with age, now all I need is for my teeth to not crack when I'm in a mad rage, and skip along the streets as I like to have the odd forage. 



I come on this forum for my friends to meet,
And I cannot express my joy as we all do greet,
Now getting them together is no mean feat,
With both Tim and Ivan it is always such a treat,
But I do forbid them to walk on my carpet, have you seen them shaggy feet.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 14, 2009, 05:00:35 AM
Br'er IVAN & MAURICE & ALL,
               ```````````````````````````````````````````````````

                 As THE BARON, I'm noted, for my Televised GHOULERY;
                 When allergies stir: 'tis always "ACHOOO!", you see,
                 My jokes, neither, clever, nor, prime,
                 Obviously, spewed, in no time,
                 Yet, occasionally, sublime, you can call them: TIM-FOOLERY!

               ````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on January 14, 2009, 05:06:59 PM
On his age friend Maurice would not fib -
Every Birthday brings nearer a crib.
He was born in a hearse
then aged in reverse!
See?- he's already got bottle and bib!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY fellow pun and rhymester!
I am sorry I've been a bit reticent on my limericks, you see...

Though sometimes I spew automatic
others, my limericks sporadic.
Seems I may be gone bats,
all these cobwebs and slats
 it's just so hard to type in the attic!

This post shall never die! Though the Good Baron Tim might suggest this post DYE itself RED! Well read, that is! Ta ta!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 14, 2009, 06:18:59 PM
Beloved UMA FANG-MILY,
... Our Idiot Savant is nearing the 9000 readership mark!
... Once described, as a "train-wreck"; impossible, to avoid browsing, due, to morbid curiosity, our Thread has racked up more views, than, most, of the other threads, combined!
... Not bad, considering the brave few, who produce, most, of this folderol fodder, as they, desperately, seek, to "Get A Life!"
... There is nothing closed, nor, clique-ish, about this time-honoured Thread, just a perverse willingness, to "Have A Go At It" sufficeth!
... You vast Numbers, o' This MONSTER'S ARMY, are EVERNOW "Velcome", to post! 

 ;D    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    ;D

           BRAVO! With IVAN, MAURICE, TERRY, & our dear Brother, PACKY,
           Avowed, to continue these Limerick gems, so mad, &, Oh, Soooo TACKY,
           I know this Thread won't DIE,
           It should be obvious, WHY:
           I shall not quit, 'til, like a Pancake Festival, there's a MONSTER-SIZED STACKY!

 ;D    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    ;D

                 "NEW BLOOD!" He sighed; thus, spake olde DRAC,
                 "Must exhibit a peculiarly madcap Limerick KNACK,
                  Of MONSTERS and Such,
                  Topics, dear; sans Crutch,
                  Other, than, Humour, & Mayhap, Arty WISE-CRACK!"
         
 ;D    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 14, 2009, 11:01:29 PM
The Baron is on fine form promoting this thread,
but at it's loss I went red,
now I know that it was only a false dread,
well done Tim you deserve some cred. 




Ah the good old baron has took up the gauntlet unbound,
I'll follow suit and cry havoc forsooth, hey it has a nice sound,
We'll all march on Packy Ivan Tim and Terry, our troops are on the ground,
So lets flood this thread with limericks anew or at least by the pound,
I know that dearest Meek is still in our thoughts so it's best to stick around,
Onward and upward we rhyme so it will always be where we are found.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 14, 2009, 11:07:32 PM
This limerick thread
Is entertaining to many
More so than Haiku
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 15, 2009, 04:38:46 AM
                              HIKE U. + 1
                         ----------------------
                         seven teen silly bulls
                         an ounce full in tent
                         cod gee lime rick
                         wry terse               ;D

                            Translation:
                          -----------------
                       Seventeen syllables
                       Announce full intent
                       Codgy Limerick Writers.  ;)

                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY THE INSCRUTIBLE, BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

                "codgy" - 1 definition - Used when a person is acting older than they are.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 15, 2009, 06:25:25 PM
WOWSERS, TROOPS!
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o

          January, the year's first month, is, now, half-way over,
          2 months & 2 days, more, 'til we're rollin', in clover,
          Limerick Leprechawns:
          No brains; all brawn,
          To dumb, to stop; to strong, to give up, or, run, for cover!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 16, 2009, 04:30:17 AM
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

           Huge bats cavort, about this eerie, moon-lit, Wint'ry sky,
           As Full Moon wanes, I hear the plaintive WEREWOLF cry,
           Frigid, nasty, Arctic Blasts,
           Do freeze, indeed, my sorry A$$,
           Which is, why, until the gentle Spring, within my Crypt, I lie!

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 16, 2009, 07:22:58 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

             There, once, was a VAMPIRE, named BELA,
             'Though, deadly, seemed a really nice FELLA,
             He'd bite, on your NECK,
             But, hey! What, the HECK!
             When you woke up, UNDEAD, you'd SMELLA!
             
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 17, 2009, 08:52:15 AM
                >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :( ~~~ :'(

                     THE BRIDE, we, all, know, fell, hard, for HER DOC,
                     When SHE spied her GREEN SUITOR, SHE BALKED;
                     SHE emitted a "HISSSS!"
                     Not, a KISS  :-*; Boy, was HE PISSED! >:(
                     HE pulled The Lever, :'( THEY 'left', together... Really, still, kind, of a SHOCK! :o

                >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'(
                                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 17, 2009, 02:41:58 PM
WOWSERS!  :o  # 495... Seems like only today we were at # 494!  ;)

      :) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ :) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ :)

           'Twas that MAGAZINE EDITOR, 4SJ, who inspired this BLATHER,
           Of marrying MONSTERS, to PUNS, like, NEWS, to DAN RATHER,
           'Twas a Match, made, in HEAVEN,
           More News, with Film, at ELEVEN,
           My Rhyme, this time, describes Our GOOD FORRY GODFATHER!

      :) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ :) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ :)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 17, 2009, 03:02:48 PM

THE FEAST OF THE EPIPHANY was January 6th... But, I'm, still, having one!
Chewing scenery, Chowing Limerick Stew & Chomping, At The Bit... 4, more!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         A mere FIVE more LIMERICKS, until Number 500 we REACH;
         TERRY, in his Winter Wonderland, might say: "LIFE'S A BEACH"!
         These messages, not, SUBLIMINAL,
         Prove activity, innately CRIMINAL;
         Were I PRESIDENT, o' The UMA, I could end, up, IMPEACHED!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 17, 2009, 04:07:01 PM
How we anyone Impeach you, when no peach is to be had?
The peach tree must be barren, since the baron is our lad
Though not Prez Tim does not throw fits
Because being impeached is the pits
And with Tim as a seargent we keep the UMA glad
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 17, 2009, 07:26:09 PM
A Scant 2, more, Limericks, and, we're half-way, to our first Thousand! Who'da Thunk it?!
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

                Our IVAN "chimes in", from afar, out, at Sea,
                To tell me, I'm "O.K"., without a PEACH Tree!
                My logic might appear fuzzy,
                Like, my face, even, scuzzy,
                The one, to post Number 500, wins my BVDS!

```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 17, 2009, 09:08:54 PM
Aha I've got post four nine nine,
It would be a sin to not give Tim the 500th rhyme,
So for his consideration shades of the twilight zone, he is lost in time,
then on to this honour our baron will be most sublime,
For I know that his puns come and sting like quick lime.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 18, 2009, 07:07:22 AM
Thanks, MAURICE & ALL,
       ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

         The courtesy extended, by which I draft Number FIVE HUNDRED
         Must include MONSTERS, like, DRACULA & his Kindred UNDEAD,
         For THEY are THE MEAT,
         That, we love, to EAT,
         Hmmm, Does that make us ZOMBIES? Try some *SWEETBREADS!

       ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

* It's very important that brains be fresh, so, either, cook them, or, freeze them, the day you buy them.
... I've, never, had, to BUY my brains; FRITZ, usually, picks one, up, for me, as a matter, of course, when he is, out, "running errands"...

Substitutes: Sweetbread is the thymus gland of animals.
... {ANIMALS; yeah, Riiiiggght! Think: "SOYLENT GREEN"!  ;)}

It is a light meat that is firmer in texture than brains.
... I dunno, 'bout that... Brains can be made firmer, by a good Formaldehyde Marinade! I use an olde FANG-MILY Recipe!
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 19, 2009, 12:02:38 AM
*******************************************************

                Entering, through these Cyber-Gates, everyday,
                EVERNOW, a Relief, to sign in, at our Dear UMA,
                The Love, never, stops;
                Your knowledge is TOPS!
                Just seeing our "Guardian Sentinels" makes my DAY!

*******************************************************
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 19, 2009, 12:26:56 AM
Kong-ratulations on the 500th post Baron but did you have to show off and post one more (LOL). I have to give you your due Tim you are quite the wordsmith and in your own words keep doing it EVERNOW.

Dracula was on the lookout for some vestal virgin's to bite,
But no matter where he looked there were none in sight,
High and low he would look with renfield who was none to bright,
As Sunrise approached they found their prey but they took flight,
Only the Count grabbed one and the others turned to give him a good fight,
One by one he threw them aside hitting renfield with his eyes closed tight,
We're not wearing white for purity you old fool we're kung fu artists that will end your blight.   

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 19, 2009, 04:47:11 AM
After his fight Drac looked rather scruffy.
No virgin in weeks made him get huffy
So the next maiden he saw
he lured in with his hypnotic draw
But too late, he learned she was Buffy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 19, 2009, 07:09:36 AM
 :D  :D  :D  :D    Oh, MAURICE & IVAN!    :D  :D  :D  :D !!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
My Beloved Brothers,
... You are infected, with the Ecstatic Agony, of Verbal Insanity, or, the infamous "AWE, NUTS!" Syndrome... Thankfully, there is no cure!
... Oh, Darn it! That bit, of expository reasoning, hath plumbed the essential line, for my next odious Limerick Ode! Brace Thyselves, Laddies! Here goeth:

             *~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

                The "AWE, NUTS!" Syndrome hath no known CURE,
                Defining "The Fine Line", between Madness and BORE,
                Limericks, abound; their Fever INCITES,
                Compelling compliance, in this BRAIN-BLIGHT;
                The only Relief, yielded, is, that, it's, not, a CHORE!

             *~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 19, 2009, 01:58:05 PM
In honour of the great man himself, Poe,
We would be a poorer race without those in the know,
While some of us are interested in Larry Curly and Moe,
Others are quite happy to dwell where the mystery doth blow,
Happy birthday Edgar you have centuries more to go.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 20, 2009, 08:13:03 PM
             *~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
 
                      There, once, was a man, named EDGAR ALLAN POE,
                      Whose Literary works have become so many shows,
                      A treasured trove, of inestimable worth,
                      Still, beloved, 200 years, after his Birth,
                      GOD, grant his Soul Peace, NOW, past, his earthly woes!

             *~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~*
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 21, 2009, 07:15:38 AM
Dear FANG-MILY,
... Your Prayers & Good Thoughts, PLEASE! From 8 A.M., until 10:30 A.M.
               ;D ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ :'(

                       Yo-Ho! Yo-Ho! 'Tis, off, to the DENTIST, I GO,
                       He is, in Tooth & Truth, "PULLING, For Me", I KNOW,
                       To get another EXTRACTION,
                       For His wallet's SATISFACTION,
                       Oh, well, by the next FULL MOON, 'twill RE-GROW!

               ;D ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ :'(
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 21, 2009, 12:27:10 PM
Hey! Everybody!
... Thanks, for your Prayers & Good Thoughts!
... Keep them coming, please, as Recovery may be painful.
... The Oral Surgeon, did an excellent job; left my LIMERICK Ability, intact!
... Or, is that, "IN TACTLESS"?! Decide, for yourselves... ;)
              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
             
                 Blood fills my mouth; messily, drools, down my chin,
                 I look, like, one, of CHRIS LEE'S DRACULA Kith & Kin,
                 As the Bloody YANK-EE,
                 My YANK-ER, I Thankee,
                 You've been, "down, in the mouth", moreso, than, I've been!

              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Gasport on January 21, 2009, 01:20:37 PM
To the dentist poor Timothy ran

His toothy extraction at hand...

while under sedation you'll feel no sensation

Just don't dream of "Marathon Man"

                                                          Feel better,
                                                                             Mike G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 21, 2009, 02:23:21 PM
Dear BROTHER, MIKE,
... Thanks, for the comforting hypnotic suggestion; er, uhm, thought!
... I could've sworn, that, the other patient, in the chair, next, to mine, was DUSTIN HOFFMAN!
... He was screaming, and, writhing, in pain, whilst I was Laughing my Gas off!
 
                    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

                         Had my tooth rotted, much more, I'd have been very ILL,
                         Now - Tooth, GONE, "Bye-Bye"! So, an Anti-Biotic PILL,
                         Is my lot, for 3 days, to TAKE,
                         Infection's hold, for, to BREAK;
                         Compared, to DUSTIN'S sufferings: Well, "You know the DRILL!" ;)

                   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                        TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 21, 2009, 06:39:35 PM
For sooth our mentors lost a tooth, get well soon and watch out for that tooth fairy I hear that she can be a bit of a b###h!



The poor Baron's lost a fang,
What will we do us members of his gang,
I guess that we will just let it hang,
Although it would have been fun to be there  oh dang,
So all is well and it's not for us to dwell but how he must have sang.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 22, 2009, 04:36:14 AM
Dear Brother, MAURICE,
... Thanks, for your entertaining submission! With the loss, my teeth look funny, yet, my Funny Bone's intact!

            *~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

                  Reserved, the proper Soul, was I, of decorum & steely aplomb,
                  I did, not, simper, cry, or, yell, when ol' Doc yanked "The Bomb",
                  'Tho', the remainder shall follow suit,
                  O' being torn, out, by the root,
                  Relieved & happy, shall I be, if it doth, not, land me, in my Tomb.

            *~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                        TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

               
           
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on January 22, 2009, 02:36:51 PM
So dear Brother Tim's lost a fang,
An event which no doubt caused a pang,
But there's twenty-one more,
Or, at least I hope, four,
Lest he's now joined the "Efferdent Gang!"

***************************************
Blessings from Brother Perry, who misses his Brother Tim
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 24, 2009, 09:35:30 AM
 ;D Dear Brother, PERRY,
... Whilst attempting, to send, in, my reply, to your fine bit, o' Limerick wit, in regards, to my Tooth travail, my computer froze... &, hath remained, so, for these past couple, of days!
... Luckily, I remembered, verbatim, the Limerick, long, enough, to commit it, to paper... which I, now, unleash, upon you & the GENERAL'S Populace! ;) I miss you, too, my Brother... &, your last phone call!

    ;D*********************************************************;D

             Our Beloved Brother, ye Effervescent PERRY SHIELDS,
             Is, like, unto a FARMER; OUTSTANDING, IN HIS FIELDS,
             Whether, in Service, to GOD,
             Or, to MAN & MONSTERS, ODD;
             His Marriage & his Offspring, KIMMYKINS, are his 2 TOP YIELDS!

    ;D*********************************************************;D
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 25, 2009, 08:22:10 AM
*****************************************************************

       I'm glad, that, I can confirm this Fact: "I am Grateful and have HOPE",
       Without It {and, our dear Olde UMA} I don't think, that, I could COPE,
       For, Life is, oft, unfair and tough; 'tis, INDEEDY-DOO;
       Almost, daily, we are tossed a handsome load, of POO!
       Our Hopeful choice is best; unlike, YGOR, who merited HANGING, BY THE ROPE!

*****************************************************************
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 27, 2009, 09:40:03 AM
What a lonely place this thread has become, with the Barons computer all but undone.  Come back soon, with that dulcet tone all a croon.



Both the creature and the Baron's computer have taken a dive,
Oops how can we survive,
What can we do for his computer to revive,
The creature could give him a scale to restart his hard drive,
So let us wait until we hear the Baron cry it's alive.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 30, 2009, 01:13:02 PM
Still no word from Tim, so I hope that this thread was not a whim.


As the mad Dr Jekyll I do enjoy the odd nip,
But when my Hyde comes out he can cause a riot with an undue slip,
I know at times he has an eye for the ladies but then again he is quite hip,
How many times have I thought that he must get a grip,
With his lack of morals he is on a fast and loose trip,
And all I can do is let my own lid go with a loud flip.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 31, 2009, 11:52:33 PM
My Beloved UMA FANG-MILY,
       ```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

          During my recent absence, due, to Arctic ice and Wintry woe,
          My thanks, to Br'er MAURICE, who said: "On, with the Show!"
          'Tis January's last hour,
          Now, February's a-bower,
          Filled, with 28 days, of Limericks, but, hopefully, no other Jobs, of Snow!

       ```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 01, 2009, 01:38:25 AM
After his winter was weathered, the Baron rejoins the thread
Poor Maurice had started to fear that limericking was dead
Whence Brother Perry had rhymed
And Timmy in response chimed
This poetry corner is still growing... with dread!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 01, 2009, 07:54:26 AM
DEAR Brothers, IVAN & MAURICE,
... Thy Grief, out-poured, over my absence, reminds me, of an Aulde Scottish Proverb:
         "O', All, ye Pensive Sorrows, Horrible, and Inhumane,
          Compounded, with despised, disruptive, vile, Gloom,
          Ye worst, we've versed, both, terse, and, inane;
          'Tis, that, TIMMY hath found his way, once, again,
          From His castle's crypt... unto Ye UMA LIMERICK ROOM!" :-*

... Same bloke wot wrote that, shortly thereafter, arrived, at this epic "tag-line":
                    "From Ghoulies & Ghosties,
                     And Long-legged Beasties
                     And Things that Go Bump,
                     In the night, GOOD LORD, Deliver us!" :o

                       {'Tis, obviously, too late!}  ;D

 >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~  >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:(
 
                   'Tis, long, been said, that: "So cheap, is talk!"
                    "More, is said, than done!" Ye Critics squawk!
                    Ye Nail's head, IVAN hath, squarely, hit,
                    Ye Ugly Truth, revealed, more, than a bit,
                    Our LIMERICK Corner doth grow DREAD... LOCKS!

 >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~  >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:( ~~~ >:(

             BIG HAIRY DEAL!... As, only, a couple, of WEREWOLVES, can say it!  ;)
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 01, 2009, 09:56:03 PM
                          THE ANNIVERSARY, NUMBER 40...
 :'(~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

        'Twas AD 1969, on Groundhog's Day, Beloved BORIS "went away",
        His weary body, spent; at 81, exhausted! What, else, can we say?
        'Tho' his mortal frame is four decades, deceased,
        His Fame, like, our Love, for him, has increased,
        Eternal Rest, in the Peace, of LOVE DIVINE, for his sweet Soul, we Pray!

 :'(~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 02, 2009, 05:39:32 PM
BELOVED UMA FANG-MILY,

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)

            My life is better, because, of BILL PRATT {aka, BORIS},
            Thanks, to a certain ACKER-MONSTER, named FORREST,
            Join my song, this day;
            Please, don't delay,
            Let's Celebrate their Memories, in Grateful Chorus!

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)
           :)                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on February 02, 2009, 05:59:43 PM
Coming in from the storm,
The sweet sent of this thread,
Draws me closer to comforts unread,
Delectable words that hydrate the soul,
Thanking you all for paper, ink, and prose.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 06, 2009, 12:02:19 PM
We are all artists, I suppose,
The General accused us of writing prose
Though I know we're not pros,
I wonder if he knows
we're just waiting for him to strike a pose.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on February 06, 2009, 01:52:30 PM
Just a technical note from an English teacher...please forgive...

Limerick rhyme scheme is A-A-B-B-A.

For example:

......nose (A)
......rose (A)
......bed (B)
......red (B)
......toes (A)


Perry
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 07, 2009, 12:48:50 AM
Our poetry's not that prosaic
It's more like a cerebral mosaic
Instead of standing on formality
we celebrate the monsters' reality
and if we don't always rhyme, then we fake it!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 07, 2009, 01:41:19 PM
I may never post here again, as I've always had free reign.  So here goes my very last go at a prose, after being told off by someone better at English I suppose.


I have been punched on the nose (A),
Now when I say nose it sounds like rose (A),
So it's off to the pale blue yonder above my flower bed (B),
To be checked over a bit of fun makes me go red (B),
But from now on our friend Perry can keep others on their toes (A).



 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on February 07, 2009, 03:05:00 PM
In memory of our dear Meek:

If we follow the form anapestic,
Our poems'll sail forth most majestic!
If the rhythm's a gimp,
Then the meter will limp,
And thus threaten the roofbeams domestic!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 07, 2009, 03:44:14 PM
Perry, you've nothing to fear
We all hold your input as dear
If you razz all the troops
(unlike some other groups),
we thrive; no grudges held here!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 07, 2009, 07:35:36 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

             Once again, for days, Ice and Snow held me, back,
             So, off-line, I've been wintering, at CASTLE DRAC,
             The drinks, there, really fine,
             Even, redder, than wine,
             Now, I'm getting soused, on all your wise-cracks!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 07, 2009, 08:11:35 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ::)
 
               Despite frigid retreats, which prevented me, from coming home,
               The cockles, of my heart are warmed, now; no more, to roam;
               So nice, to come, back,
               And, find this huge stack;
               Wild & crazy Limericks, to fertilize the mind & make the mouth foam!

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ::)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 08, 2009, 08:30:20 AM
                          ;) SOME THING TO CONSIDER...  ;)
   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
         "The whole," 'Tis said, "is equal, to its parts' sum."
         Except, up, in HEAVEN, which is "Where" we hail from,
         The MONSTERS, in our Strange Mix,
         Add Spice, to our Surprise Tricks,
         Yet, we're, all, laying bricks, For HIS Kingdom, yet, to come!
   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: toysoldierman2001 on February 08, 2009, 03:10:44 PM
The top of the morning to you.Which you reply And the rest of the day to yourself. ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 09, 2009, 08:16:28 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

            THE MONSTERS appeared, upon this Full Moon's mild eve,
            Impressed, by this spate, of Dame Nature's gentle reprieve,
            DRAC sucked down his Bloody Mary;
            Flew, out, "for a bite", as The Others did tary;
            They threw one hell, of a party, like, you wouldn't believe!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: toysoldierman2001 on February 09, 2009, 10:53:02 PM
To Perry the English teacher
We don't worry about correct grammar or spelling here
As this is a place for monsters and fear!
Keep in mind this is all for fun,So stay cool Son! ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on February 10, 2009, 10:56:37 AM
No offense meant, my friends,
I came to make amends,
Just a gentle reminder,
My "please forgive" was kinder,
I thought, than a kick in the end(s)!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 10, 2009, 08:49:53 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)
       
       No offense?! Our Beloved Brother, PERRY, there is, none, TAKEN;
       We like you, to SPY, so, that, we're "Stirred, but, not, SHAKEN",
       No need, Hoot Mon, to post BOND,
       Don't BAIL, e'en, if you've YAWNED,
       Our Faux Passe, with Limericks, you heart shouldn't be BREAKIN'!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 12, 2009, 06:36:38 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
     :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)

                  ABRAHAM LINCOLN, we do honour, today,
                  Our 16th President, for whose Soul, we pray,
                  His life was, indeed, very rough,
                  But, made, of "The Right Stuff",
                  He triumphed, in death, as in Life,
                  To lead the Hearts, of This Nation, along the Right Way!

      :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :)
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 13, 2009, 08:28:06 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

             That Annual Day, for Lovers, SAINT VALENTINE'S,
             Arrives tomorrow, via CUPID, come rain, or, shine,
             Seems, that, Winter's bracing cold,
             Makes warm {or cold} hearts bold,
             Just ask THE Unrequited GROOM, in THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 15, 2009, 03:51:03 AM
       ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

                Scarce, we are, now, one scant month, away,
                Our First Anniversary, on that Fabled IRISH Day,
                When this Thread, begun,
                Incited rafts, of MONSTER Puns,
                Even, GENERAL TERRY Praises them; Therefore, TROOPS, OBEY! ;)

       ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 15, 2009, 08:26:41 AM
      ::) *******************************************************  ::)

               With 10,000+ Readers, of our acclaimed UMA IRISH STEW,
               I'd say, that, most, people love them... well, mayhap, a few;
               For, Our MONSTERS get Named,
               Whilst we, writers, get Blamed,
               As a WEREWOLF, untamed, I've got miles, of smiles, left, to accrue!

      ::) *******************************************************  ::)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                  TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 16, 2009, 06:54:18 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o

                There, once, was a VAMPIRE, from ROMANIA,
                Who, rather, than look atcha would DRAIN YA;
                Leaving his coffin, one night,
                Found the Sun was, still, Bright;
                As he turned, to dust, he hummed MALAGUENA!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 17, 2009, 02:32:44 AM
I've been absent a while, but not to malinger
At work my poor digit got injured
Though still possessed of the other nine
To date I'd been typing just fine
By hunting and pecking with just the one finger

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 17, 2009, 06:14:26 PM

 :-* *****************************************************  :-*

                Our own CRAZY IVAN returneth, to give us the finger,
                O' Tidings, sad, or, mad, he is our water-logged bringer,
                His sore digital digit,
                Proves him no idiot,
                For, in his new style, of typing, he is my dead ringer!

 :-* *****************************************************  :-*
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 21, 2009, 06:33:53 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
 ;) ************************************************* ;)

                Winter treks, in ferocious Februarial gloom,
                So much ice and snow, outside my room,
                4 days, tucked, away,
                From Cyber-space,
                Again, "I'm Baaaccckkkk!": Your LIMERICK LOON!

 ;) ************************************************* ;)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 22, 2009, 01:40:28 AM
Limerick Loonies we are, it's for sure
Who can resist the Baron's lyrical lure?
We keep on returning
You'd think we'd be learning
But it just might be a lunatic we're looking for
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 22, 2009, 05:51:58 PM
THANKS IVAN, for chimin' in!
 ;D ****************************************************** ;D

             Our dear olde Friend, Singer and Musician, BILLY JOEL,
             To whom IVAN refers {not, Actor, PATRIC KNOWLES},
             "May be a Lunatic", like, LON, JR,
             In FMTWM, wherein, he's a Loner,
             Yet, MR. ZEVON'S "WEREWOLVES" hath much better HOWLS!

 ;D ****************************************************** ;D
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 23, 2009, 08:44:25 PM
... ANY WEEK, NOW  ;)
 ;D ***************************************************** ;D

                     In IRELAND, 'tis a GRAND HOLIDAY,
                     ST. PADDY'S, when folks are so GAY,
                     They dress, all, in GREEN,
                     From their hat, to their SPLEEN,
                     But, too much GREEN BEER comes, out, GRAY!

 ;D ***************************************************** ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 24, 2009, 01:40:23 AM
The beer may be green but gray it comes out
That's not too much of a reason to shout.
All the drinks in the movies
look gray, which is groovy,
Since the classics are what we're all about!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 01, 2009, 09:06:09 AM
 >:( **************************************************  :'(

           "MARCH!" He said. "Git yer lazy arse, out o' that bed!"
           "Winter is, soon, fleeting, even, if, you're UNDEAD!"
           But, I don't know, what, to wear;
           I'm as mad, as a MARCH HARE,
           So, I'll throw, on this LIMERICK, to fill you, with DREAD!

 ;) **************************************************  ;D
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 01, 2009, 02:27:46 PM
While you're shouting "March!", "Madness!" says I
If you wear only limericks you surely will die!
With the chill in the air,
you'd be nearly bare
And our poetry corner will run dry.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 01, 2009, 08:30:58 PM
 ;D ************************************************************  ;D

        No word, from Br'er MAURICE, despite our tongues, a'waggin',
        From Ye EMERALD ISLE, his noble contributions are laggin',
        That Laddie, a "foine broth",
        Seems encumbered, in sloth,
        Or, mayhap, THE SAINTS took him away, in THE ST. PADDY'S-WAGON!

 ;D ************************************************************  ;D
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 02, 2009, 04:38:53 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

           WALPURGISNACHT vill be here, before you know it,
           Evil forces roam, unleashed, &, they vant, to show it!
           The MONSTERS, underneath my bed,
           Nightly, discuss their plans, of dread,
           Until sleep-deprived, I scream, instead: "Ah, STOW IT!"

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
... If I am, to look my very "BEAST"... er, "BEST", for CASTLE DRACULA'S All-Nacht Par-Tee, then, I MUST get my "Beauty Sleep!"  ;)
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 04, 2009, 08:28:31 PM
Cough cough cough, I'm getting a fur ball with all these werewolves keeping the thread alive. How are you both doing my two best wolfy pals, fine I hope.

Posting on here near St Patrick's day has been a hoot,
And not one silver bullit have I had to shoot,
Instead I'm  aiming for a target near home,
By going out into my garden and painting green on my pet gnome,
Now if you excuse me I'm having my arm torn out by the root.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 04, 2009, 08:41:59 PM
and I'm coming up for a gulp of air and belch out a limerick, please excuse the brazen stereotype,
I just a Czech
wadja expec?

Frankie O'stein got drunk daily
til he met up with Officer Bailey
"Though your skin may be green
soon it's stars you'll be see'n!"
then laid him out with his Shillelagh

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 04, 2009, 11:23:58 PM
 :o ``` :D ~~~ ;D *** ;) !!! ::) ... :-*

'Tis a Monstrous Limerick creation, a foine Oirish Stew,
Cobbled, together, with boiled cabbage & flat Ale brew,
Ye've done it, again,
By usin' yer brains,
Ye Proof's, in ye Puddin', jus' loike ye aulde Oirish do!

 :o ``` :D ~~~ ;D *** ;) !!! ::) ... :-*

... Ye Blarney-Stoned Limerick Leprechawns! Ye do a thread proud, with yer effortless out-pourings! Jamie Joyce, The Man, Himself, could'na done nae better! Happy, was I, to see, that, ye, still, have it, in ya... or, did, 'til ya barfed it, all, up, on our Cyber-sidewalk! Careful, Laddies, not, to step, in it!
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,   :-*
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 05, 2009, 02:49:31 AM
Watch out, Maurice, lest your arm be unrooted
A Lawn Gnome can be vicious when wounded
Painting one green
seems rather mean
Since Leprechauns, unlike Gnomes, aren't that fundic.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 06, 2009, 06:09:29 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::)

               BEWARE{WOLVES}, o' THE IDES, O' MARCH,
               Strengthen yer HIRSUITES, with extra Starch,
               & "all that rot, pip-pip!" "Stiff Upper Lip";
               As Werewolf snouts always look so hip,
               Drink a River o' Blood, yet, still, feel parched!

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::)
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,   8)
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 06, 2009, 08:33:39 PM
An Irishman's throat can be parch,
but he'll quench it for good every March.
soak potatoes in gin,
and then eat the skin
so beware the HIDES OF STARCH!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 07, 2009, 04:33:14 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

         This Limerick recognizes the humble Potato, that Irish staple,
         Which tastes, most eloquent, slathered, in Sugar o' Maple.
         Our tongues exult, in sweet, upon sweet,
         Energizes us, right down, to our dancing feet!
         Legendary, of Olde; records, unearthed, in tombs, of Constantinople!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,    ;)
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 07, 2009, 05:12:58 PM
On St Paddy's Day the Mummy starts reaking
when the green beer gets his facial features tweaking
The barkeep cuts him off
But Kharis just scoffs
Till he looks down, and sees his wrap is now leaking
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on March 07, 2009, 06:29:13 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4p99rf63jCE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4p99rf63jCE)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 08, 2009, 06:10:24 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

          Mad, as March Hares, we, all, are, we, UMA Poets,
          Providing Limerick weirdness, to all, and, we know it!
          So, E. A. POE is RAVEN MAD,
          A. E. NEWMAN'S smile is, quite, glad,
          With THE GENERAL, &, IVAN, &, PACKY, to help, to bestow it!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,   ;)
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 09, 2009, 06:26:56 PM
The day o St Paddy draws nearer,
and our limericks grow ever dearer.
I thought I was Irish
but I must be Vampirish,
cuz I can't see myself in my mirror!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 09, 2009, 08:41:55 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

          I have, to agree, with PACKY PAUL, about that VAMPIRE part,
          When I last saw him, I removed the stake, from his heart,
          Youthful flesh returned, to his bones,
          As did his clothes {or, their clones},
          But, when he tried, to bite my neck, it gave me, quite, a start! ***

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

            {*** So, I returned the stake, to its previous location!}
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,    ::)
               TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 10, 2009, 07:01:59 PM
       ;D ********************************************************  ;D
                                      THE SHAMROCK & ROLL
                                      --------------------------
              'Tis one short week, away; a mere seven swift-passing days,
              When ST. PADDY'S-DAY MONSTER Limericks are, again, "all the craze",
              Don't bother, to raise my ire, or, call me a liar,
              Instead, grab a torch, to "fight fire, with fire",
              Submit your own MONSTER Limericks, to keep this thread ablaze!

       ;D ********************************************************  ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,     :-*
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 11, 2009, 03:16:48 AM
When I crossed the Atlantic in my tub
I stopped in Spain, at a real Irish Pub
But it's not for St Pat
that I stay where I'm at;
I can't get the Spanish bartenders dubbed
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 11, 2009, 12:56:28 PM
Poor Ivan stepped into an Irish spaghetti,
Has he not heard of a creature called Frankenghetti,
He has a flat top head and is the fastest draw on the plain,
Being Spain the rain was mainly on it but his mood is so flighty,
And as Ivan stepped forward he proved who was the more mighty.


 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 11, 2009, 04:51:01 PM
Friend Maurice is returned, right as rain
That monster did have a flat-top mane
but winning was not my fate
instead we fought a stalemate
Because we both share an idiot's brain
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 11, 2009, 08:49:44 PM
*~~~~~~~~~~ :D~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D~~~~~~~~~~ :-*~~~~~~~~~*
                    MAURICE, again, is in "Two minds, today",
                    Sort, of a double-blind study, in Galway,
                    Double-talk, both, in Brogue,
                    Never, goes, out, o' vogue,
                    "CroŪ Cultķrtha na h…ireann"*, as they say!
*~~~~~~~~~~ :D~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D~~~~~~~~~~ :-*~~~~~~~~~*
                      *Ireland's Cultural Heart
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,      ;)
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 12, 2009, 06:48:59 PM
 ;D~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

         TV HORROR, a.k.a., MAURICE, lives, in "The Land o' The Shamrock",
         'Twas amongst me Ancestral Homes, too; so, I'd be loathe, to mock,
         Whereas, TV Dinosaur, BARNEY,
         Fills me head full, o' Blarney,
         Yet, filled, the most, is our Host, Gen'l. TERRY, who's dressed, oft, for GLAM ROCK!

 ;D~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,      :-*
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 12, 2009, 08:01:30 PM
Our plan has been simple,
We sent a seed from Erins green land cute as a dimple,
Baby Timothy was his name converting the States to green was his game,
He was told to infiltrate the horror conventions without a ripple,
But like most plans it failed because he discoverd he was fond of a tipple.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 14, 2009, 06:00:20 AM
 :P ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :P
   
                We never whine about the weather, nor, do we fear it,
                When an icy blast strikes, we just grin and bear it,
                We, merely, triple our tipple,
                Which shocks Mr. Whipple,
                With wines, like, Thunderbird & Ripple, or, else, we just Gin & Beer it!

 :P ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :P
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,      ::)
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 14, 2009, 07:33:36 AM
While I was in Spain, I ~DID~ gin and beer it
What was I to do?  All were in such good spirits
On Paddy's Day I still won't be home
But I'll think fondly of Maurice's Lepre-Gnome
then I'll find me some green... and then wear it!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 14, 2009, 03:13:32 PM
My Beloved WEREWOLF Brother, IVAN,

;D *********************************************************** ;D

                  If, in the Navy, you wear Green; why, you've "gone barmy"!
                  I cannot stress, enough: "Fatigues are worn, by the Army!"
                  UMA Troops, to the rescue;
                  We'll coat you, in fescue!
                  Then, Green, you'll be, on ST. PADDY'S, so, GOD Bless you!

 ;D *********************************************************** ;D
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,      :-*
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 14, 2009, 05:33:12 PM
With this revered Irish holiday loomin'
Tim's lim'ricking fingers are zoomin'
His poetry sure makes me smile,
But I'd rather visit the Emerald Isle
I can't help it; to Erin is Human
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 15, 2009, 06:46:32 AM
 ;D :D;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D  :D;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D

    CRAZY IVAN is a MASTER WIT; conveyed, by what he writ: "to Erin is Human" - ?!
    Ooohhh! Wish I'd written that, but, "To HERRON is {to be an Idiot,} Bloomin'"!
    Of you, UNCLE FORRY must be proud,
    When I read that line, I laughed, aloud,
    And, I look, forward, to more, o' the same, apun the Limerick horizon, loomin'!

 ;D :D;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D  :D;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,      :-*
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 15, 2009, 07:18:17 AM
Thank you Tim for your complementary verbosity
I'd like to return the favor.
But it turns out I'm composing the wrong type of poetry
So I must request a waiver.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 15, 2009, 04:03:30 PM
 ;) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)

           'Tis March 15th; only 2 days, to go - this thread is all a'fever,
           An Anniversary, Our 1st, you know, sells lots, of pain reliever,
           Still, devoutly, read,
           By Troops, inbred,
           Driven, MAD, by Limerick Blarney; I know, for, *I'm a Believer!

 ;) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)
... *Had to throw, in a nod, to THE MONKEES' English component - DAVY JONES!
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,  ;D     
                   TIMMY & THE BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 16, 2009, 07:31:40 PM
 ;D~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

          I came, today, to say, that, we're mere hours, away,
          From Anniversary # 1, o' Limerick ST. PADDY'S DAY,
          A muddled rhyme, o' Irish Stew,
          Best consumed, with Guinness Brew,
          For a Funny-Bone Hang-Over; the price, which we must pay!

 ;D~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,   :-*   
         TIMMY & THE BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 16, 2009, 09:29:14 PM
Luck O' the Irish, it's Saint Patrick's Day, at least out in the Atlantic
Our crew's doing fine, but we're still pressed for time, and some of us are getting frantic
I feel lucky for this thread; thank you Meek
For a year it's been clear; we're all freaks
With all our rhymies to prove we aren't Limeys; we're obsessed with these limmerick antics
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 16, 2009, 09:55:03 PM
Happy Saint Patricks day to my friends afar, lets hope that we meet soon to join in a jar. All the best both Tim and Ivan for I know that Tim is on land and Ivan is our jolly Jack Tar.





The big day has arrived and I'm covered in emerald green,
Sure as I walk in the parade I'm a sight to be seen,
On Saint Patrick's day the World joins in honourary Irish come all,
The drink may flow until twilights last gleam,
With the day over here's to another years sweet dream.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Unknown Primate on March 16, 2009, 10:14:15 PM
To the Universal Monsters that all dwell within us,
From the biggest on down to the thinnest,
A TOAST, I must say,
On this Saint Patrick's Day,
With an imperial pint of Guinness!

Mark "Madman Mahoney" Stamper
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on March 17, 2009, 04:27:54 PM
Faith and be gory! I almost let'er slip by  -  gettin ready to leave this job and head to band rehearsal, here's an in betweener:

Dr Franky O'Stein was no saint,
made living from bodies that ain't.
But to honor St Pat
dipped the chap in a vat
and coated him with Kelly Green PAINT!

For three more Irish Limerix see go back to the very first post in this thread ! Happy Day to you Paddies from Paul "Czech please" Koloc
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 17, 2009, 06:13:35 PM
Dear UMA FANG-MILY,
... On behalf, o' all our contributing POETS {and, I use this word, in the kindest, and, most prolific, of exaggerations} , I offers Ye, all, this WORD O' WARNIN':
                      ---------------------------------------------------
                       YOU KEEP READIN', AND, WE'LL KEEP WRITIN'!
                      ---------------------------------------------------
... HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY, AD 2009, B.G.G., and, GOD Bless You, MEEK!
                       :o "ERIN, GO BRA-LESS!" ... XENA, TOO!  ;)
  ;D ********************************************************** ;D

            Me workday, again, is done; too, the settin' o' ST. PADDY'S sun,
            Like DRACULA, now, I Bloody Suck... at makin' Limerick Puns!
            PRIMATES & GENERALS post, on This Thread,
            Yet, the Rank & File are the UMA's local UNDEAD,
            Like, PACKY, IVAN, MAURICE & Moi, who, daily, stick, to our guns!

  ;D ********************************************************** ;D
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*     
              ST. TIMMY O'BARON & GREEN BEER, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 17, 2009, 06:31:40 PM
It's hard to follow Tim's act
So I may have to throw out my tact
There's just no other way
on this St Paddy's Day
if we're to keep our limmerick thread intact.

Ivan O'Shaunnaski
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 19, 2009, 12:41:22 AM
Shackles abound with the Barons alter ego, The dreaded Tim is no mere mortal. His demands are legendary he wants us to make whoopee on this thread, but what more can we do to satisfy this human beast. I feel a pity for the poor misunderstood werewolf who has to share this thing of unspeakable evil.


One day they are going to make us a Baron collectible,
I for one will gladly display it for it will be delicable,
Through all Tim's faults he is not a bad fellow,
But get on the wrong side and he will bellow,
So I ask the UMA members to make the Baron more formidable.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 19, 2009, 05:31:53 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                 LARRY TALBOT treated the Singer, rather, like, a swine,
                 Displeased, as he was, with THE SONG OF NEW WINE.
                 Incensed, by the Toast, of "Living, forever",
                 He wanted, to die; unleashed, from Life's tether,
                 Freed, from his Curse, with the Help, of DR. FRANKENSTEIN!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,  ;D
            TIMMY & THE BARON & CLASSIC MONSTERS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 19, 2009, 07:24:12 PM
"Mister Taylor" did cry out in protest
When long life was promised, in jest
But when flooded with water
Herr Frankenstein's daughter
Saw that Larry could finally get some rest
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 20, 2009, 05:26:26 PM
 :o~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

             Olde IM-HO-TEP could exercise stange occult powers,
             To win HELEN GROSVENOR'S Love, without flowers,
             FRANK WHEMPLE was a dandy,
             Who'd have plied her, with Candy;
             THE MUMMY'S Doom came, in mere seconds, not, hours!

 :o~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,   ::)
            TIMMY & THE BARON & CLASSIC MONSTERS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 21, 2009, 07:05:37 AM
                            My Beloved UMA FANG-MILY,
 ::)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~::)
 
                   I write Limericks, "to hold down the Fort",
                    Until, our noble UMA Troops issue a retort,
                    Yet, sometimes, my rhymings,
                    Filled, with odd meters & timings,
                    Prove my brain "a day, late, &, a dollar, short"! 

 ::)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~::)
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,    :-*
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 21, 2009, 07:32:03 AM
No worries, Tim; your rhyming and verse
Is always welcome here, for better or worse
Though your visage is scary
and your palms may be hairy
I'm glad you share with us your curse

... of writing limericks, of course!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 21, 2009, 09:13:19 AM
 ;D ... Thanks, Br'er IVAN, for that final note, of Clarification!
     ...  Even Non-WEREWOLVES can be afflicted, with... :o
          Well, you know ;)... Don't say, we didn't warn you! ::)
     ... I think IVAN has been ship-board, too long... and, his mind is a-wanderin'!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-X   
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 21, 2009, 01:31:52 PM
Oh these two werewolves are doing my head in,
If they keep on posting I'll soon be in the loony-bin,
Daily now I struggle with my evil side,
But because of my practise I can't afford to slide,
My good side wants to relax while my evil side keeps slippin.


Message from Mr Tv Horror:
 PLEASE IGNORE THE ABOVE RANT, HE'S A GOODY TWO SHOES WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHAT HE WANTS. AS MY FRIEND THE BARON SAYS POSTINGS ARE GOOOOOOD!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 21, 2009, 02:54:37 PM
 >:( ================================================>:(

        Another strangely conflicted note, from that Irish Fella,
        About his split-personality, and, how one don't smella,
        You see, if one stubs his toe,
        The other avenges POE,
        They're, both, RAVEN Mad, in Honour, of BORIS and BELA!

             ;) {And, that's, all, I'm gonna tell ya!} ;)
 >:( ================================================>:(
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-X 
        TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 21, 2009, 03:39:00 PM
                          raycastile writ:
       My brother is a cop and my dad is a retired cop.
       I have a cousin who is a cop.
       So it is a wonder I didn't become a cop.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Brother RAYMOND,
... Oh, NOOOOO! I FEEL A LIMERICK COMING ON!
Please, observe:
     :o ~~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~~  :-* ~~~~~~~~  ;D ~~~~~~~~  ;)

           I would, rather, cop a feel, than, feel a a cop,
           I'd rather cop a plea, than, say: "Please, stop!",
           These voices in my head,
           Are COFFIN RAY'S Undead,
           And, when the going gets tough, the Undead go, out, and, SHOP!

      :o ~~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~~  :-* ~~~~~~~~  ;D ~~~~~~~~  ;)   

... But, more, about Moi, later!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
                          ~~~ POST'S CRYPT ~~~
Mi apologetto, if'n ya'll read this before... but, it belongs, here, too, being a Limerick!
In the interest, of Art, I changed the last line... :-*         
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 22, 2009, 06:12:18 AM
 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

               We "sprung* forward", just, one week, ago,
               Wish Mother Nature would stop the snow,
               As blossoms uncurl,
               I cry, like, a girl,
               To see them, all, frozen; a heart-breaking blow.

 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                             *Springed? Sprang?
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 22, 2009, 09:40:01 AM
The Baron must be on a roll
He even writes poems about snow
His lyrical leisures
Must give the rest of us seizures
And that why he's stealing the show
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 22, 2009, 03:06:40 PM
 ;D ****************************************************** ;D
                         AHHH, SHOW BIZ...
                        ----------------------
       If, I'm "on a roll", then, I shan't throw, in the TOWEL,
       IVAN butters me up, like, my Limericks are "WOW!"
       "Stealing the show", by penning these lines,
       Is, like, the Grave Situation, of DR. FRANKENSTEIN,
       "*That special feeling, when you are stealing that extra" BOWEL!

 ;D ****************************************************** ;D
      * i.e., "Nowhere do you get..." Thank you, ETHEL MERMAN! { Get it?! ;) }
                         IRVING, "Ich been ein BERLINER!"
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: mike c on March 22, 2009, 09:51:59 PM
A tip of my hat to the Baron
For writing so much without swearin'
 He may not be keen
 If it's 'sprung', sprang' or 'spring'
But at this point I'm not really carin'!


Mike C.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 23, 2009, 08:02:17 PM
 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)

    Your generous response, MIKE C., is appreciated, and, duly NOTED!  ;D
    Why, to bravely post a Limerick, here, is, just, like, having VOTED.  ;)
    You SPRANG, into decisive Action,  ::)
    Which SPRUNG, from Satisfaction,  8)
    With SPRING, the Main Attraction, like, a 'GATOR, in the Bayou, that, has, by you, FLOATED!  :o

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 25, 2009, 03:14:35 AM
 :D ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ :D

                 With Spring's return, UMA fields bloom, to adorn,
                 With endless rows, their crops, of demented corn,
                 Limerick puns keep a-popping;
                 MONSTER Madness: Whopping!
                 Ripening, with each, new, morsel, this thread, never, to adjourn!

 :D ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ :D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 25, 2009, 01:11:25 PM
The Baron has spoken Mike C is officially floated,
Mike's limericks are here to be corroded,
With Spring on the air,
We here on the forum don't care,
For Mike has posted and our pride has made him bloated.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 25, 2009, 02:19:58 PM
I don't get all this talk of Spring, Out here it's still quite chilly
To speak thusly while shivering, I'd go running willy-nilly
Though I'll soon no longer be afloat
I know that I'll be needing a coat
When departing my boat with my clothing in tote all these words that I've wrote will seem silly
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 26, 2009, 03:31:57 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

              When Spring turns, into Summer, for CRAZY IVAN,
              He'll be doing, far, more, than, merely, survivin',
              His time, afloat, done,
              No more, "BOAT FUN"
              Our WEREWOLF Son-Of-A Gun, will be THRIVIN'!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 27, 2009, 03:14:26 AM
;) ************************************************************** ;)

           The Scene: a BAR, with olde Friends, FRANKIE, DRAC, and, LARRY, ;D
           Out, for an evening's festivities, to, simply, relax, and, tarry, :)
           FRANKIE stole the scene, ::)
           In his Shades, of GREEN; 8)
           DRAC flew the coop, as The Full Moon rose: Things got REALLY HAIRY!  :o

;) ************************************************************** ;)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                  TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 27, 2009, 06:57:57 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*

             Try, as he might, THE INVISIBLE MAN found, that, he couldn't tan;
             The Sunbeams, just, passed, through him, like, wind, through a fan,
             His impressive physique,
             Would be pale and bleak,
             So, he tried a fake tanning lotion, but, it sweat, off, when he ran.

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*
                                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                          TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 28, 2009, 06:13:37 PM
 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

                 COUNT DRACULA gave RENFIELD'S neck a TWEAK,
                 Which rendered him, unable, to breathe, or, SPEAK,
                 He'd botched DRAC'S vile PLAN,
                 With MINA, firmly, in HAND,
                 He died, as he fell, down CARFAX' steps, with, nary, a SQUEAK!

 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 29, 2009, 07:03:58 AM
Erik was commonly known as the Opera Ghost
A fan of the arts, he truly loved Christina the most
To perfect her voice he trained her
but when she got scared he restrained her
And in the end the Phantom, like his love, got burnt like toast
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 29, 2009, 08:12:57 AM
 :o ************************************************************ :o

            KHARIS shambled, about, following orders, on one good leg,
            To fulfill the wrath, of OSIRIS, when His Priests would beg,
            TANA Leaves, nine; steeped, at Full moon, as Tea,
            Was, all, it took, to set THE MUMMY PRINCE, free,
            That, he failed, so, often, proved, to be, upon his wrinkled face, an egg!

 :o ************************************************************ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 29, 2009, 08:23:21 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

           We're, now, broken TWELVE THOUSAND Readers, on this Limerick thread,
           Proving, that, the UMA Troops, are CRAZY{like, IVAN}, as well as UNDEAD!
           Today; we've infected This MONSTERS' ARMY,
           Tomorrow; The Whole World will go BARMY,
           As Limerick Monsters fill the Frightened Populace, with  Uncanny DREAD!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 29, 2009, 08:52:48 AM
Crikey, but that's a lot of readers
Luckily we host such competent leaders
Packy, Meek, and Terry brought this thread to life
while poets like Tim, Maurice, and Mike cut like a knife
with their sharp wits, they impress THIS bottom-feeder!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 29, 2009, 03:50:13 PM
DEAR UMA FANG-MILY,
... To dredge, up, an olde phrase, from the fabled '60's, as a Limerick Punch-line, to a Silent Era Film:

          ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~  :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D

               A Great CHANEY Make-Up, "THE MAN, IN THE BEAVER HAT",
               A Classic VAMPIRE; frozen, evil, leering smile; with eyes, that,
               Are dead, yet, alive, with malice;
               Inhabiting some spooky olde Palace,
               His film, lost; yet, photos, still, prove, that, LON knew "where it's at"!

          ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~  :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 29, 2009, 05:42:12 PM
Lugosi's Dracula had three beautiful brides,
As midnight chimed poor Renfield into sleep he slides,
Unaware of the danger he was to face,
Slowly they moved towards him with grace,
Saved only from their lustful thirst as the Count from the veranda glides.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 29, 2009, 05:52:47 PM
Renfield the solicitor with the brides was truly smitten
But only thanks to Dracula was he never bitten
The vampire drove him insane
and by the time it was done, he was slain
But at least he died back in Great Britain
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 30, 2009, 02:50:41 AM
 >:( ****************************************** >:(

              There, once, was a WEREWOLF who swore,
              That his Curse made him a social bore,
              Yet, try, as he might,
              To offset his plight,
              He tore his way, into more and more gore!

 >:( ****************************************** >:(
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 30, 2009, 08:31:02 AM
I am the monster but I should not be taken from a wagon on wood,
My hands and feet are bound up tight and good,
O.K I stalk about the forest on the lookout for a friend,
First there was that stupid shepardess who screamed no end,
Then I met my new friend the hermit and I lost him because I stayed for some food.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 30, 2009, 09:24:38 AM
A Werewolf named Wally Daninski
Was truly a hairy buttinsky
Many men has he slain
And their women he has... comforted
Not bad, for a wolf-man in his seventies
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 30, 2009, 08:12:29 PM
 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)

                      WEREWOLVES AND THE ART OF ZEN
                      ---------------------------------------
                   Olde WEREWOLVES, never, seem, to die,
                   But, it's, not, that, we're, not, willing, to try,
                   Our food is quite lean,
                   It makes us so mean;
                   Killing people, on diets, is one-third less filling.

 :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 31, 2009, 05:27:03 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                Time Marches, Onward, even, as March's Time runs, out,
                APRIL FIRST is Tomorrow, as we Fools, all, shout,
                A LON CHANEY BIRTHDAY,
                A Toast: HIP-HIP-HOORAY,
                With, WOLF MAN Full-Moonshine, and, Undead Sauerkraut!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 31, 2009, 08:31:56 PM
                      HAPPY BIRTHDAY, # 126, LON CHANEY, SR.
 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*

                QUASIMODO was crowned, as "The Lord of Misrule",
                LON SR., was born, on April 1st; The Festival of Fools,
                Man of a Thousand Faces,
                His Talents, multiple Aces,
                Face and voice, hands and heart, his Imagination's tools.

 :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*
      Google results, 19,500 for LON CHANEY, SR.'S BIRTHDAY. (0.19 seconds)
                    Lon Chaney, Sr. ó Date of Birth: April 1, 1883
              "LON CHANEY SHALL NOT DIE!" FORREST J. ACKERMAN
              ------------------------------------------------------------
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 01, 2009, 06:16:12 AM
Poetry wrote on April 1st
Is recognized as some of the worst
Not for actor Lon Chaney
am I being complainy;
it's these verses to which I'm adversed
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 02, 2009, 03:46:44 AM

                     To Borrow a Punch-Line, from THE ACKER-MONSTER!
 8) ************************************************************ 8)

                A MONSTER, Unstoppable! His Unearthly Visage, a SIGHT:  :o
                Pointed Teeth; Tall Hat; Eyes, that Devour, with FRIGHT!  :o
                Despite the loss, of the Film's Can,  :'(
                Like, the too early loss, of THE MAN,  :'(
                We, all, know the Span, of What LON DONE AFTER MIDNIGHT!  ;D

 8) ************************************************************ 8)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 03, 2009, 03:54:49 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

             Ahhh, that Glorious Era, which CLASSIC MONSTERS evoke;
             With my ability, of Creative reminiscing, I'm one lucky Bloke,
             Not, just, dead tradition,
             More, like, Nuclear Fission,
             To bring the delight, of LON, BORIS and BELA, to Today's folks!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.







Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 04, 2009, 02:41:03 AM
                        "Ahhh, GRASSHOPPER"
           ------------------------------------------------
                  {No relation, to DENNIS HOPPER}
 ::) `````````````````````````````````````````` ::)

             To let Thine essential "INNER-LIMERICK" flow,
             Thou must think, of SHELLEY; STOKER; POE,
             Just construct a phrase,
             That's sure, to amaze,
             And watch, as these verbal MONSTERS grow!

 ::) `````````````````````````````````````````` ::)
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 04, 2009, 11:18:31 AM
For these verbal monsters, we all are meet cattle
No matter which one of us is in the poet saddle
They consume all our time
till I must let flow rhyme
To the monsters, 'growing' is half the battle!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 05, 2009, 04:07:31 AM
                          A SIDE-EFFECT OF IRON-POE BLOOD?
 :( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :(

                 It is, fast, approaching Six A.M., on this April Sunday Morn,
                 Between sleep and, cyber-dreams, I am tossed and torn,
                 Asleep: I tend, to snore,  ::)
                 On-line: The Limerick chore;  :o
                 To Dream, of MONSTERS, or, be One  ;) : each, a choice, forlorn.  :'(

 :( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :( 
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 07, 2009, 03:23:49 AM
          POOR MR. SASQUATCH! What happened to him was, truly, ABOMINABLE!
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

           The YETI, with his NETI-POT, was cleaning, out, his sinuses,
           One howling winter day, pond'ring its pluses, and, minuses,
           The snow-drifts, round-about,
           Made him vacillate, "In, or, out?"
           Ahead, by a nose, yet, as he arose, he got "STONED", by local the MEDUSAS!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 07, 2009, 12:00:36 PM
When I buy my Uni monsters I love to get huge savings,
The smell of the vinyl leads to these cravings,
If the package has that rare model of Dynamo Dan,
What more can a fella ask only that it's in the can,
Thank you all for listening to my most recent ravings.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 07, 2009, 12:59:25 PM
Never trust an allergy medication from a demon
It just might turn your face to stone, or at best leave you screamin'
I'd rather have a plugged-up head
than have it 'cured' by being dead
I'll get my prescriptions from a PhD man
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 07, 2009, 01:01:39 PM
My first Universal monster toy
was a MEGO Frankie when I was a boy
he's now gone! I must wail,
long ago sold in a yard sale
I just hope he still brings someone joy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 07, 2009, 08:11:51 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :D

            I don't, really,  collect, much, except, DRACULA'S dust,
            Or, from my Friend, RICHARD SHEFFIELD, whom I trust,
            Is my rare DRACULA RING,
            My only Treasured BLING,
            Unless you count the sculpted 3-D ring, of ELVIRA'S Bust!

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :D
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 08, 2009, 03:06:15 PM
My friend the Baron is a person you can trust,
I know that in his hands this thread will never rust,
But I've noticed of late,
That he must long for a date,
Hence his healthy desires over Mistress Elvira's bust.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: mike c on April 08, 2009, 05:18:25 PM
With the love of that vampiric bust
Good Baron, I sympathize much
In fact I could say
A safe bet any day:
On THOSE subjects, we'd all like to... touch!

<ahem!>

Mike C.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: mike c on April 08, 2009, 05:22:01 PM
I probably shouldn't be rhyming
Twice in row; it's bad timing
But if 'a limerick a day
Keeps the Baron at bay',
Then two ought to send him into hiding!

Mike C.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 10, 2009, 04:13:50 AM
                 My friend the Baron is a person you can trust,
                 I know that in his hands this thread will never rust,
                 But I've noticed of late,
                 That he must long for a date,{* ;) *}
                 Hence his healthy desires over Mistress Elvira's bust.
            ---------------------------------------------------------
                          {* ;) * More, on this, soon.}

                                                 * PREFACE
                                                    ----------
                                                  SPLENDEAD:
                                                  -------------
   According, to the Von WOLFSTEIN DICTIONARY, SPLENEAD is the  Past Tense, of SPLENDID.
The Logic is simple, if not downright, non-existant:

               When you're PAST TENSE, you're most likely dead!

A Second Definition, for SPLENDEAD, is: "Overdosing, on a sugar substitute." Also, spelled: SPLENDAED.

A SECOND Definition, for "PAST TENSE", is "UTTERLY RELAXED".

As GROUCHO stated: "We're way past tents; we're living in bungalows, now."

As JETHRO TULL sang: "So, let's bungle{low}, in the jungle... well, it's alright, by me."}

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

         BR'ER MAURICE: Thy latest contribution, indeed, is most splendead!
         As fine a Limerick, as e'er, m'Lad, that I've encountered; writ, or, read;
         'Though my praise pours, forth,
         Like Fine Wine, south to north,
         This Limerick, from my entrails, I hope, won't go to your head!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 10, 2009, 05:03:53 PM
               With the love of that vampiric bust
               Good Baron, I sympathize much
               In fact I could say
               A safe bet any day:
               On THOSE subjects, we'd all like to... touch!
                                    <ahem!>
                                                                  ~ Mike C.
               --------------------------------------------------------

               ELVIRA, or, BUST; a concept, absent, of choice, ::)
               Not: "one, or, the other", do I, upon you, foist,  >:(
               She's a package deal,  ;D
               For which you feel,  :o
               In Braille, like a snail; your tongue, your voice!  ;)

              ----------------------------------------------------------
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 10, 2009, 06:08:04 PM
I am humbled by the Barons words, he is a great mentor and to be in his company an honour to be sure.

There's a mummy loose on the ground,
Lock all the windows and doors,
Make sure that you search all the floors,
Tread very carefully before a corner you go round,
If you are caught all is lost as your body will never be found.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 12, 2009, 05:53:53 AM

                  I probably shouldn't be rhyming
                  Twice in row; it's bad timing
                  But if 'a limerick a day
                  Keeps the Baron at bay',
                  Then two ought to send him into hiding!
                                                               ~ Mike C.
   8) --------------------------------------------------------------------  8)

             MIKE C., My BROTHER! Moi? "Go, into hiding"?! Au contraire!
             For two Limericks, writ, per day, my Friend, I'll go nowhere;
             True, this madness is an Art;
             To "put on airs", not, just, f*rt,
             Don't HECKLE, JEKYLL, nor, if you CROW, about HYDING, swear!

   8) --------------------------------------------------------------------  8)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 14, 2009, 05:36:31 AM
       :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

                           The MONSTERS know genuine pain,
                           They wish they were human, again,
                           They drink blood; tear out throats,
                           Mummies yearn, to sow wild oats,
                           Whilst Zombies make Lunch, out, of brains!

       :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 16, 2009, 03:51:37 AM

  :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                    GODZILLA made Tokyo "Toast",
                    With his bad breath, made it roast,
                    Nuke fire, from gizzard,
                    Unique claim, for a Lizard,
                    So, being KING of MONSTERS' his boast!

  :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 16, 2009, 01:16:11 PM
Godzilla is a wimp hear me roar,
I am the King of monsters I am Kong,
Japan may have been leveled which is wrong,
When I growl you'll run until your feet are sore,
The only downside is I cant be like Mothra and into the heavens soar.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 17, 2009, 03:47:39 AM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                On massive staircase, festooned, in cobwebs, I approached,
                This young Englishman, who, just alighted, from my coach,
                Sees the fiendish gleam, in my eyes,
                From 500 years, of Undead, devilish lies,
                I am DRACULA, Vampire King; upon his throat, I'll, soon, encroach.

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 18, 2009, 04:00:18 AM
My BELOVED UMA FANG-MILY,

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

            Amid recent heartaches, of a tempest-tossed life,
            I am, most amazed, to have found my wife,
            The past buries its evil dead,
            In October, we're to be wed,
            For, in her Christ-filled Love, I am healed, of strife.

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 19, 2009, 12:32:06 PM

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~;D

              The scary 1944 Poster read: "The Devil's Own Brood",
              No MYSTERY, in THE HOUSE, unlike, "EDWIN DROOD",
              With Icons, BORIS and LON,
              Meeting GLENN and JOHN,
              Plus, LEO and ELENA; WOW! Always, makes me FEEL GOOD!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 20, 2009, 04:40:43 AM
          ;D ~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ ;D

               In our LIFE'S MONSTER SALAD, The Ingredient List RUNS,
               So, to Laugh, 'til you cry, scoop on UNCLE FORRY ONIONS;
               For, 'tho', we, oft, make HASTE,
               We mustn't skimp, on the TASTE,
               Keep ladling, on, the savoured Flavour, of PERPETUAL PUNS!

          ;D ~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FJA & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 20, 2009, 11:57:28 PM
What's this? The Barons salad gives you the runs. Behave yourself Sir!


While it is great to hear the Baron's news,
I can't help but run to pinch my nose,
He has plans to rule the World with his onion dose,
I see the masses run for their lives from his vantage views,
People in general holding their noses from his foul phews.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: mike c on April 21, 2009, 01:09:25 AM
His recipe does sound quite dismal;
The depth of the gas pains abysmal.
But short of abstaining,
The only remaining
Solution is Pepto-Bismol!


Mike C.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 21, 2009, 09:09:29 PM
          ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::)

                BARON Von WOLFSTEIN is a MONSTER, most HAIRY,
                With MAURICE and MIKE C., a STOOGE, like LARRY,
                Three WILD'N'CRAZY Writer GUYS,
                Limerick puns, of the most truthful lies,
                Who amuse, via Nonsense, in GENERAL, like, TERRY!

          ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::)
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,   :-*
          TIMMY & THE BARON & CRAZY IVAN & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 23, 2009, 11:53:14 PM
In old Edinburgh town lived a man called Gray,
Nightly this fiend goes about his grisly task  to slay,
His delight is torturing Dr MacFarlaine over his dark past,
How much can a man take before he breaks at last,
With blood on his hands he meets his end as fear holds sway.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 24, 2009, 07:16:00 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                     In IRELAND, the Banshees do roam,
                     Mad, at the mouth, they do foam,
                     Your life they shall quell,
                     A wraith-like death-knell,
                     So, don't let one follow you home!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW, 
      TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 25, 2009, 03:29:18 AM

          :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                     COUNT DRACULA said, to His Vampire Bride,
                     Don't drink the Blood, from JEKYLL & HYDE,
                     Their blood has a taint,
                     They are what they ain't,
                     If you do, you might unleash a MONSTER inside!

          :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 26, 2009, 02:35:31 AM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

              LARRY TALBOT, into THE WOLF MAN, did CHANGE,  :-[
              'Neath the Full Moon's influence became DERANGED;  >:(
              He Lupinely loped, from the MOORS,   ;)
              Thru DR. NIEMANN'S Mad Lab DOORS,  ::)
              To MEET a FRANKENSTEIN, o' the GLENN, most STRANGE!  :o

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
         TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 26, 2009, 03:18:57 PM
Dear LURKING NON-MEMBERS,
... To catch the full effect, and meaning, of this Limerick, you must sign up, with The UMA! :-*
... 'Tis the TAG{You're-It}LINE, to a luvly thread!

            ------------------------------------------------------------------------
             :o ICON ;) TRANS :) FORM :D A ;D TION 8) Oooohhh! SCARY! ::)
            ------------------------------------------------------------------------

                  "REVENGE", Br'er MAURICE?! ... "TERRIBLE", you say?!
                  Why, you're, as guilty, as I, in writing our Limerick essays,
                  Poor DAVID might have become daft,
                  Worth it; if, even, once, he's laughed,
                  Proves, that, "he's worth his salt", in our MONSTER KID Ways!

             ------------------------------------------------------------------------
             :o ICON ;) TRANS :) FORM :D A ;D TION 8) Oooohhh! SCARY! ::)
            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, Like DAVID, GOOOOODDD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: LonChaney on April 26, 2009, 05:28:40 PM
                     To Borrow a Punch-Line, from THE ACKER-MONSTER!
 8) ************************************************************ 8)

                A MONSTER, Unstoppable! His Unearthly Visage, a SIGHT:  :o
                Pointed Teeth; Tall Hat; Eyes, that Devour, with FRIGHT!  :o
                Despite the loss, of the Film's Can,  :'(
                Like, the too early loss, of THE MAN,  :'(
                We, all, know the Span, of What LON DONE AFTER MIDNIGHT!  ;D

 8) ************************************************************ 8)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.



ROTFLMAO!!!!!!   ;D


(http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/92/l_c5c8df59c4344306a9bc13c9298de2a5.jpg)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 26, 2009, 06:14:15 PM
There was a horror director named Tod,
Who thought that carnie people were near to God,
He treated them with grace,
While others were a disgrace,
Even before they broke ranks and pitched into a sod.


I salute the cast of Freaks the real beautiful people. I have always found it to be a poignant love letter of a film. 


Welcome LonChaney to the Limerick thread
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 26, 2009, 08:31:38 PM
   :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

               Welcome, To LON CHANEY, THE MAN, Of VERSATILE FACE,
               THE UMA began, with Your Work; Now, quite, a Cyber-Place,
               Despite Multitudinous MONSTERS, galore,
               Their best origins were YOURS, of Yore,
               I believe, that, you're listed, amongst my Friends, on MySpace!

   :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & LON, SR. & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 27, 2009, 09:00:36 PM
            :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                   FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER awoke, and, "went, for a walk",
                   To help his Friend, YGOR, by "cleaning the Jury's clocks",
                   One, by one, "He done them in"
                   Murder, most foul; a Mortal Sin,
                   'Til WOLF saved his Son and gave the MONSTER his knocks!

            :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & BORIS & BELA & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 27, 2009, 10:23:16 PM
Junior wanted to follow his Father's dream,
But his time came as the Wolfman gathered steam,
Lon Sr may have created the Phantom and other strange roles,
So together they played a variety of great horror as likeminded souls,
What a World of monsters and fools they left this father and Son team.
 
Title: Irish Limericks & JOSEPH FOTINOS' BIRTHDAY Ahead!
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 29, 2009, 08:31:19 PM
   ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

... My Beloved BROTHER, &, Fellow HORROR HOST, ANTON JOSEPH, celebrates another Birthday!
... A Merlot Salute, to Thee, Great Soul!
... GOD Bless You, TAMMY & EDWARD!

      :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                   There, once, again, comes a NIGHT, called WALPURGIS,
                   When, wisely, we stay home, lest, evil should PURGE US,
                   Don't go, out, crazy, to SHOP,
                   Or, all, your money, you'll DROP,
                   No! Stay home, and, Pray, some, to calm the MALL URGES.

      :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & PROFESSOR GRIFFIN & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 29, 2009, 11:42:29 PM
I don't know how you do it, Baron you never miss a holiday. I have heard it whispered that you are a master of arcane practises, either that or you have a calendar. Personally I like the first reason better it adds an air of mystery.



Walpurgis night is celebrated in Germanic states,
Ghosts and ghouls haunt the night and it never abates,
Children laugh and dress up like the Halloween feast,
Roaring and screaming they roam the streets like some wild beast,
Theres fun to be had as well as the odd fright along the cemetery gates.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 30, 2009, 07:21:30 PM
     TV HORROR: "I have heard it whispered that you are a master of arcane practises,"
... Actually, Br'er MAURICE, I pass muster using an "R"-CANE and am a practicing Proctologist!
... After all, Practice makes perfect!

                         TV HORROR: "either that or you have a calendar."
... And, make Salads, in a colander ... in my Proctological practice, it's called a COLONDER!

           TV HORROR: "Personally I like the first reason better it adds an air of mystery."
... Yes, some "mysterious airs" are "circulating" ;) , about my personal space! :o
... Which inspired STING, to sing:
              "don't stand, so,
               don't stand, so,
               don't stand, so close, to me..."
... Which inspired me to quoth:
              "Oh, STING, where is Thy death?!"

     :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

                   A WEREWOLF, named IVAN, was, out, to sea,
                   A Brave Sailorman, vowing, to keep us, all, free,
                   POPEYE, with Spinach, he is, not,
                   Rather, ties Spinal Cords, in a knot,
                   But, we miss him, a lot, TV HORROR and me!

     :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & CRAZY IVAN & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 01, 2009, 09:15:05 AM
My BELOVED UMA FANG-MILY,

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

            Amid recent heartaches, of a tempest-tossed life,
            I am, most amazed, to have found my wife,
            The past buries its evil dead,
            In October, we're to be wed,
            For, in her Christ-filled Love, I am healed, of strife.

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

What's this? Do my old eyes deceive?
I hope not, or I'll have cause to greive
for this jouyous occasion
we'll all gain new relation
as a sister-in-law we are soon to receive!

Congrats and God Bless both of you! 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 01, 2009, 09:16:47 AM
Though I thought to simply lie down and expire
Maurice broke news to me of urgency most dire
Timothy weds this October
So I must become sober
And abandon this plot to retire!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 01, 2009, 09:19:54 AM
With no clear holiday for May 1st
You can expect this poem to be one of my worst
Hardly anyone celebrates Beltane
And running round May Poles can be a real pain
I shouldn't bother with rhyming, but I'm cursed
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 01, 2009, 07:15:36 PM
Our little shaver has returned from the Mediterranean,
Because of his sea bound voyage he never got much but a medium tan,
So I welcome him back with an open arm,
Various members noticed his  return for great harm,
Bogey, the Baron and myself are pleased for he is our man.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2009, 07:20:55 PM
     :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)

              IVAN hath returned, in this Merrie month, o' MAY,
              With more stories, to tell, than TURHAN BEY,
              He was evil, yes; but, no dummy;
              Other, than cheating THE MUMMY,
              4000 Year-olde Dirt, proves that, GRIME DOESN'T PAY!

     :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 01, 2009, 07:36:59 PM
Most recently I went to Walt Disney World
And dined at the decorated Planet Hollywood
Now I'm just happy to be here
Heck, I'm glad these days to be anywhere
Though I've yet to visit Universal Studios Orlando like I should
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on May 01, 2009, 08:19:38 PM
It's been a while I know
But rhyming to me comes slow
Yet this thread is so welcoming
Even a novice can feel like E.E. Cumming(s)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on May 01, 2009, 08:32:21 PM
Unsure of his pen, General Terry
Of writing a poem was wary--
He feared he'd be rotten--
But so good he's gotten
That his talent is now almost scary!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 02, 2009, 03:24:46 AM
              ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                      ROBERT, TERRY and IVAN are posting, gloriously, once, again,
                      This thread glows, with positive Life; filled, with Good Friends,
                      Creativity, anew, within our Ranks, soars,
                      Proves us, not, fossils, we, UMA Dinosaurs,
                      Distinction, not, extinction, our Creed; we, all, say: "AMEN!"

              ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                     TIMMY & THE BARON & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 03, 2009, 03:00:56 AM
CRAZY IVAN writ:
                             What's this? Do my old eyes deceive?
                             I hope not, or I'll have cause to grieve
                             for this joyous occasion
                             we'll all gain new relation
                             as a sister-in-law we are soon to receive!

                             Congrats and God Bless both of you!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D

                   My BELA-ted Thanks, to Br'er IVAN,
                   For no false emotions, connivin',
                   O'er the Wife, I'll be takin',
                   Who is, True; not, a fake 'n',
                   Come, to our Weddin'; we'll be High-5in'!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
 
            My Beloved Bride says, that, she wishes, to take,
             A new, and, second, Tattoo, for her Hubby's Sake;
             A Portrait, o' BARON Von WOLFSTEIN,
             My BARONESS' Love is, like, NEW WINE,
             I can hardly wait, to begin Our Life, of LOVE, that we'll make!
             
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 04, 2009, 06:22:47 AM
A tattoo of the Baron would be boss
And the perfect decor for Mrs Tmotheus
I know she'll feel much deared
if she acts like your mirror
Since your reflection is merely a loss
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 05, 2009, 02:13:51 AM
       ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

               A BARON Von WOLFSTEIN Tattoo, on Her BACK, would be "BOSS",  ;)
               LOVE'S Constant Reminder, of Her Luvin' WOLF/MAN, TIMOTHEUS, :-*
               To be fair; I'd rather find it, up, THERE,  ::)
               Than, if it be located, on her DERRIERE, :o
               "BUMMED-OUT", by the "Comparison", which is, too oft, Moi CROSS! :-[

       ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 07, 2009, 05:33:13 AM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::)

                  THE MUMMY, IM-HOTEP, by name,
                  Decided, to play his little arcane game,
                  To win, back, the love,
                  Of his long-lost Lover,
                  That, he failed, she should take the blame.

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::)
            "'Tis a woman's perogative, to change her mind."
          After so many Re-Incarnations, who could blame her?
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on May 07, 2009, 10:46:32 AM
Wolfstein and ladylove, who are datin'--
I'm curious--Are you in Dayton?
Or do you still be
In Ol' Tennessee?
To know your location I'm waitin'!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 07, 2009, 06:07:18 PM
      ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                     My Beloved Brother, TYPHOOFORME,
                     Remainin', we'll be, in TENNESSEE,
                     Yet, we love, to travel,
                     So, Ohio, we'll unravel,
                     As, long, as it's part, o' The Land o' The FREE!

      ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on May 07, 2009, 06:28:16 PM
Yet anon you will trek to Penn's Woods,
To delight in the Bash brotherhoods--
Then back South you will stray,
Where--I reckon--y'all say:
Good ol' Tennessee's got the goods!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 09, 2009, 07:59:53 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                    Dear ELDER ROBERT, is, y'all agree, a very Funny Man,
                    A distinct pleasure, to converse, with one, so sage, and,
                    'Tho', he makes the wisest, of cracks,
                    His caring has taken loads, off my back,
                    To MONSTER BASH, with you, again, Good Friend, my definite plan!

 ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 10, 2009, 06:17:00 AM
Would that I could get to WonderFest
Or Monster Bash, or any of the rest
But my ship is returning to sea
And it had better not go without me
Or I could wind up in the brig; no jest
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 10, 2009, 01:07:47 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

        CRAZY IVAN; in The BRIG? Like, LON, in the local jail, in HOD;
        DR. EDELMAN & MILITZA watched his Transformation, odd!
        LON "took a turn, for the Nurse";
        Broke EDELMAN'S Vampire curse...
        When the Full Moon arose, finally, kept his LARRY TALBOT Bod!

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 13, 2009, 03:03:24 AM
 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::)

                     The VAMPIRES arose, at nightfall,
                     In Tennessee, they suck blood, y'all;
                     They turn into BATS,
                     'Cos, "That's where it's at!",
                     But, the last line, I just don't recall!

 ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 13, 2009, 03:15:58 AM
Perhaps vampires have been buzzing the Baron
Into their eyes he's been starin'
His memory's fine
but he's forgotten the line
How unlike Brother Timothy Herron!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: The Drunken Severed Head on May 13, 2009, 03:51:05 AM
It's been a while I know
But rhyming to me comes slow
Yet this thread is so welcoming
Even a novice can feel like E.E. Cumming(s)


Terry, it's very plain to me
You're missing a line; where can it be?
They must total five--
Or else it is jive
And your limerick ISN'T one, you see.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 18, 2009, 05:44:31 AM
::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*

              WONDERFEST, DONE; The day, now, called: "MON",
              Of Tales, of UMA Delights, I've got, literally, a TON!
              Howe'er, due, to Limerick VERSE,
              Requiring Poetics, quite, TERSE,
              I'm adverse, to adding verse, so, I'll end, with a PUN!

::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 19, 2009, 02:32:49 AM
I'm sailing fast to Manhattan Isle
I won't be back home for quite a while
But if someone could post pix from WonderFest or a link
(he says with a nudge and a wink)
then I'm sure I'll handle being gone with a smile
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Uncula on May 19, 2009, 11:57:31 PM
:'(  The UMA Limericks are bad.
Their Rhyming and Syntax are sad.
I hear you say "NO"!
and "Say it's not so"!
But the Irish in me says "There's the Lad"!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Uncula on May 20, 2009, 07:36:51 AM
  Sorry to all about my limerick.  I was going on no sleep and just for fun, I dashed out a piece of doggerel.  Every one here does a great job and I didn't mean to offend anyone.  You all have my most serious apology.
  Uncula
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 20, 2009, 08:07:42 AM
Uncula you haven't offended
we knew that you only pretended
to label us lame
with your rhyme just the same
No apology needs to be sended
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on May 20, 2009, 12:56:41 PM
My Brother, Tim, I surely missed,
Having not attended Wonderfest,
Robert Taylor, too
New friends, who
I hope will soon make a trek out West!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 20, 2009, 07:53:25 PM
 
   ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

                    UNCULA is a most charming Soul, that's a fact,
                    Since his Niece is our own Poet, MISS DRAC,
                    We shared WONDERFEST FUN,
                    Three days, on the pun... er, Run,
                    His Limerick, funny & quaint; sans intent, to detract.

   ;D ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 21, 2009, 12:15:32 PM
 :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :-*

               A distinct pleasure, and, great Honour, to manifest UMA LOVE,
               For, all, of the CLASSIC MONSTERS, whether, here, or, Above,
               This WONDERFEST, COUNT DRACULA reigned,
               Said He, with toothy grin: "I vould do it, again!"
               "For, I represent UMA MONSTER-KID JOY, if push comes, to shove!"

 :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  :-*
                                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 21, 2009, 02:08:03 PM
I'm sorry I missed out on the show
I really had wanted to go
with the Uncle Forry tribute
and an Alien movie theme, to boot
I would have loved it, I know!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Uncula on May 21, 2009, 03:44:05 PM
:D My UMA friends are like kin
surely, in them is no sin.
When you do something dumb
and have started to run,
they reach out and bring you back in.



Thanks to all!, Uncula
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 23, 2009, 04:58:30 AM
  :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*

            We are, all, in this UMA ARMY, together,
            Despite many storms, we must weather,
            My FANG-MILY, you are;
            FORGIVENESS runs, far,
            To establish LOVE'S Freedom; not, ego's tether.

  :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 23, 2009, 05:56:31 AM
My poems lean towards the comical
But the Baron is quite philosphical
WE all are brothers in arms
In the UMA we do not cause harm
Unless you count that "accident" with the Necronomical
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 24, 2009, 08:18:50 PM
     :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*

               I'd hoped, to attend California's MONSTERPALOOZA,
               To be DRACULA, or, FRANKENSTEIN, I had, to choosa,
               Then, my BELOVED, BETH, came my way,
               So, my cash is reserved, for our WEDDING DAY,
               Mayhap, next year, we can ride, to CAL., on my APPALOOSA!

     :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :-*
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 26, 2009, 07:48:12 PM
   :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

               "NEVERMORE!" Quoth E. A. POE'S RAVEN,
               To the Man, victimized, and, quite, craven;
               That, the Bird never wert,
               Either, ERNIE or, BERT,
               On yon Bust of PALLAS; a hell-spawn Maven!

   :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 28, 2009, 01:34:29 PM
    :-[ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :( 

             MONSTERPALOOZA is Here; ALAS! OH, NOOOOOOOO!
             I wanted, to be, There, "BUT, ON, WITH THE SHOW!"
             I'll miss, out, on DANNY'S Dinner,
             Still, I won't grow any thinner,
             Next year, I'll be a WINNER, when BETH & I get, to go!

    :-[ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :(
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 30, 2009, 04:38:40 PM

    ;D ~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D

           A Great Weekend, for, a pretty nifty suit, of THREADS,
           MONSTERPALOOZA is The REASON; so well-read,
           DANNY ROEBUCK & MIKE C. SHINE;
           ELIOT B. hath Created a FRANKENSTEIN!
           Keep the photos/write-ups comin'; Sweet Dreams, when I go to BED!

    ;D ~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 31, 2009, 04:59:46 AM
Two great cons, back to back I missed.
Because I was afloat; man, was I... frustrated.
During Monsterpalooza and WonderFest
I couldn't avoid being sailor-dressed,
Lest anyone think they were dissed.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 01, 2009, 02:27:19 AM
      :o ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~  ;D ~~~  :o  

                  Our Dear Brother PERRY, as a Young JACK PIERCE,
                  Bore a resemblance, to our Hero, awesomely fierce,
                  'Neath foam latex and glue,
                  Kindred Spirits shine, through,
                  I give the Dude due praise, during my prayer-time, of TIERCE!  

      :o ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~  ;D ~~~  :o

                           THANK GOD, for a Monastic Back-ground!
... Rhyming PIERCE / Fierce... ?!... AMBROSE BIERCE?! Nadalottaoptions! ;)
... Turns, out, that the choice, of TIERCE had multiple, Cosmically-Comedic-Confluence!

            tierce  (tÓrs) n. 1. also Tierce (tÓrs) or terce or Terce (tŻrs) Ecclesiastical
            a. The third of the seven canonical hours. No longer in liturgical use.
            b. The time of day appointed for this service, usually the third hour after sunrise.

                                                     ALSO:
                                                    -------
2. A measure of liquid capacity, equal to a third of a pipe, or 42 gallons (159 liters).
 ;) What most MONSTER KIDS consume, in the Hotel Bar, during the Convention!  ;)

3. Games: A sequence of three cards of the same suit.
 ::) Like GROUCHO, HARPO & CHICO; or, LARRY, CURLY & MOE!  ::)
    
4. Sports: The third position from which a parry or thrust can be made in fencing.
 ;D SEE?! They referred, to PERRY, directly, by name... even, though it's misspelled!  ;D

5. Music: An interval of a third.

[Middle English, from Old French, from feminine of tiers, third, from Latin tertius; see trei- in Indo-European roots.]
Here, endeth the Epistle.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
BROTHER TIMOTHEUS, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 03, 2009, 02:51:24 AM
    ;) ~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-*

         So many UMA Threads, to read; they, truly, do, Suit us, so very well,
         Our MONSTER KID Warp and Woof, recorded, is, ever, clear, as a bell;
         Spanning the weave, of Time,
         So many subjects; sublime,
         Save, these LIMBURGER-ICKS; as you can tell, by your sense, of smell!

    ;) ~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-*
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 03, 2009, 06:02:04 AM
A rose, by any other name, doth still smell as sweet
So too does this thread of limericks remind me of old feet
Our poets have proven resourceful
no matter, our readers remorseful
But we're long passed the point of retreat.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 04, 2009, 12:56:02 PM
     :'( - "THE WAY - :'( - YOU WALKED - :'( - WAS THORNY" - :'(

    DAVID CARRADINE, may your tormented Soul, indeed,  Rest, in Peace,
    From the personal demons, that haunted you, may you, be Released.
    GOD'S Mercy, EVERNOW, Attend You,
    Immortal; Free, of, all, that tainted you,
    Your TRUE IDENTITY, Released; with your DAD, be HEAVEN-BLESSED!

     :'( - LOVE DIVINE - :'( - BE WITH YOU - :'( - IN PEACE, EVERNOW- :'(
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 05, 2009, 03:52:20 PM
   :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o

        From his Lab-Slab, THE FRANKENSTEIN MONSTER arose,
        Punched his Doctor-Creator, right, square, in the nose;
        When THE MONSTER landed his punch,
        It made the poor Doc "Blow Lunch",
        THE MONSTER laughed, then, said: "Ahoy! Thar he blows!"

   :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 07, 2009, 03:49:17 AM

   :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

              Amid moonlit ruins, the WOLF MAN is forced, to prowl,
              Chased, there, by angry villagers, he emits a fierce howl;
              The olde floor collapses,
              Ice Cavern entraps him;
              As LARRY TALBOT, finds FRANKENSTEIN; face, set, in a scowl!

     :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 07, 2009, 07:05:26 PM
    :o ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :'(

              THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA, at the organ, did bask,
              In Genius, playing DON JUAN TRIUMPHANT, his life's task,
              CHRISTINE, romantically, attracted,
              While ERIK was absorbed, distracted;
              His Artistic Dream ended, when she removed his mask!

    :o ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :'( 
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 09, 2009, 08:09:21 PM
        ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

              MAX'S Birthday, again; just, like, his head,
              The years roll, by, like, I roll, out, of bed!
              His playing TARZAN, to Wife, JANE,
              Is, like, DR. PRETORIOUS; INSANE;
              She loves his Brain, 'tho' his body, he shed!

        ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
                        HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MAX!!!
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 10, 2009, 01:06:49 AM
The Creature had a thing for the gals that were 'swimmy'
but he had a hard time, cause his face was all 'finny'
so he came up with a plan
to grab whoever he can
Wait; is this a poem not written by Timmy?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Perry S. on June 10, 2009, 04:14:52 PM
*****************************************

Universal's got a new "Creature" show,
For more monster fans, they hope to sow.
Should new fans it bring in,
For Universal, it's a win,
But for purists, it brings only woe!

******************************************
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 10, 2009, 06:33:58 PM
    :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ :-*

               THE CREATURE, and, Moi, we've run, long, "neck-to-neck",
               We, both, work, for SCALE, but, Hey! What the heck?!
               Brothers, CRAZY 1VAN & PERRY S.,
               Valiantly, try, to clean, up, my mess,
               Like, RODNEY DANGERFIELD, I say: "I don't get no respect!"

    :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ :-*
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 10, 2009, 09:34:26 PM
Brother Timmy's too modest to say
But he's all that keeps the wolves at bay
When the rest of us our slacking
his poetic whip is cracking
And this forum thread grows by him every day!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Uncula on June 13, 2009, 04:48:19 PM

  My daughter moved out,
  she's long gone.
  But to look in the garage you'd say I'm wrong.

  But She came today.
  took her things all away
  now we'll park in the garage e'er long.

  Uncula
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 13, 2009, 06:46:29 PM
    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

               Out, of my make-ups and costumes, I'm an average guy,
               To meet me, on the street, you'd never wonder: "Why?"
               But, inside my mind, a Classic Monster, I'm;
               Devising new performances, most o' the time;
              To fill you, with Childlike Wonder, Sublime, I'll, EVERNOW, try!

    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 15, 2009, 08:35:04 AM
My trip to New York and New Jersey is over
I avoided the swine flu by using 4-leaf clovers
All those diagnosed have returned to working
Though their movements are filled with creaking and jerking
I can't tell if they're zombies or simply sailors that are hungover
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 16, 2009, 04:20:02 PM
  :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)

          "IF PIGS HAD WINGS", why, then, surely, "SWINE FLU",
          I've seen it happen, like that, in my time, a time, or, two,
          But, Brother IVAN is well,
          At least, so, he do tell,
          "Bringin' Home The Bacon"; a prime-cut, in a UMA Ham-bone Stew!

  :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

   Seriously, Br'er IVAN, I pray, that, you {& we} continue, to evade this nasty contagion! ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 20, 2009, 08:14:21 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~ ::)

              A million new threads, again! But, never, you fear!
              For, UNDEAD, This MONSTER returns; I do re-appear,
              To LIMERICK MONSTERS:
              BELA, BORIS & LONSTER,
              To Venerate, in 5 lines, ALL, that, we hold, most dear!

 :o ~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~ ::)
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: typhooforme on June 20, 2009, 08:35:49 PM
Chuckled tall old Sir Christopher Lee:
"I hardly believe what I see!
Knighthood honors at last
Crown my movie-filled past
Since the Queen said, 'Sir Lee--yes-sir-ree!' "
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 23, 2009, 05:40:15 PM
      ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D

             When our ELDER ROBERT writes, 'tis, with serious aplomb,
             His style makes DRACULA BITE; he, never, delivers a bomb!
             The TAYLOR "couth" is, quite, neat,
             With his "Tongue-In-Cheek", replete,
             I marvel, at his proverbial feats; BEST, someday, on a UMA CD-ROM!

      ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 24, 2009, 05:06:19 PM
    :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~  :'( ~~~~~~~  :'(

                 THE MONSTER BASH, upon this Year's Horizon, looms,
                 Memories abound, for me, from each and every room,
                 Alas, this year is, not, mine,
                 Despite my FRANKENSTEIN,
                 Work & Wife take precedence, &, mayhap, a smidgen, of gloom.

    :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~  :'( ~~~~~~~  :'(
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 27, 2009, 06:17:00 PM
 ;D ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :'(~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~ :-*

             Dearest Brothers, E-GeORge and YGOR and RICHARD GORDON,
             My MONSTER BASH FRIENDS;, FANG-MILY, to whom I'm beholden,
             Whilst I miss them, 'tis true,
             Better, to rejoice, than, to rue,
             You, all, live, in my heart, in Memories & future Hopes, GOLDEN!

 ;D ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :'(~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~ :-*
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 27, 2009, 11:26:06 PM
It's been a while since I posted to this thread
But don't think that means that I'm (living) dead
Though my talent's run dry
Timmy's the real guy
that's the reason this topic's so well read!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 28, 2009, 03:58:22 PM
      :o ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :-*

              So, IVAN knows: "TIMMY'S the Real GUY FAWKES!";
              Smoking his PARLIAMENTS, straight, from the box;
              No VENDETTA, that, we know, of;
              His "V" is, all, "PEACE & SHOW LOVE",
              A VICTORIOUS VICTORIAN VAMPIRE, He Really, ROCKS!

      :o ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :-*
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 28, 2009, 07:21:47 PM
Guy Fawkes, a vampire?  I don't know if you're serious.
But Victorian?  No way!  Timmy must be delirious!
Guy was captured by the Brits and well tortured
His "victory" was dying before being drawn and quartered
Though 400 years later, his impact on culture is clear... ius.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 01, 2009, 01:53:55 AM
 ;D ~~~~~  :D ~~~~~  :) ~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  :o ~~~~~  :-*

                   HOORAY, I say, for our Beloved Brother, IVAN,
                   With him, I know, of no guile & very little connivin',
                   He picks up the slack,
                   In Limerick joyful attack,
                   His brain's out-of-whack, but, his Heart is a-thrivin'!

 ;D ~~~~~  :D ~~~~~  :) ~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  :o ~~~~~  :-*
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 01, 2009, 02:19:07 AM
                      BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG Sergeant ***** Posts: 932
     Re: New Sub-Forums; Reply #5 on: Weds, 1st, o' July. A.D. 2009 at 2:12:36 AM Ľ

    ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::)

                   I LOVE, all, the UMA FORUMS, even, the SUBS,
                   Please, kindly, pay us a visit; aye, there's the rub,
                   To forget our Off-4E-rings is sad,
                   LIMERICKS, misunderstood, not, bad,
                   Tucked, away, just, as Rad, off the main Hub, BUB.

    ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~  ::)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & BETH & IVAN & PAUL & ROBERT & TERRY  & YOU!, B.G.G.
                The Universal Monster Army TOYS IN THE ATTIC TOUR
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 03, 2009, 02:58:01 PM
    :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)

           My Beloved, BETH, and, I, on This INDEPENDENCE DAY, The 4th, of JULY,
           Wish, to our UMA TROOPS, this slice, of Gratefully Received APPLE PIE:
           We Pray, for a most Safe and Happy HOLIDAY,
           As AMERICANS, who enjoy the Right, to say,
           "GOD BLESS AMERICA"; Thanking Those, who, for our Country, have died.

    :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 03, 2009, 04:24:03 PM
Timmy and Beth, I return your salute!
Grab you own horn, and give it a toot!
No horn, but I do have a cowbell
and I don't really play it too well
But my patriotism, like yours, is resolute!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 05, 2009, 12:55:44 PM
    :o ~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~  :-[ ~~~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~~~  :'(

         Since our LIMERICK thread, now, resides, on "Games, Polls and Lists",
         Our readership hath dwindled, down, to a trickle; often, quite missed,
         IVAN, remain, we must, iron-willed and resolute,
         To make our dedicated few, laugh & hoot, to boot,
         Unable, to resist venturing, here; like, the VAMPIRE'S Kiss, too hard, to resist.

    :o ~~~~~~~  ::) ~~~~~~~  :-[ ~~~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~~~  ;) ~~~~~~~  :'(
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 05, 2009, 05:48:54 PM
To bolster our readership will be tough
We must be made of sterner stuff
With more poems posted we could
if we started making our poems good
I'm not sure I'm creative enough
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 05, 2009, 07:14:00 PM
           ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)

                  Dear IVAN; why imply, that our poems are, not, good?!
                  We don't rhyme, in Hip-Hop, like Da Boyz In Da Hood!
                  Mayhap, Brother, mine, if we did,
                  We'd snag the Younger UMA Kids,
                  Who'd think our word-skills, "TOP-NOTCH", like, FILM was, to ED WOOD!

           ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 06, 2009, 02:32:29 AM
I simply suggest, Brother Tim, that in Games, Polls, and Lists
We may be left alone here, shaking our fists
Not that we're worse than before
Or that our egos ought be sore
But better bait might catch more prey, get the gist?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 09, 2009, 03:19:29 AM
 :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~ ;)

                     COUNT DRACULA, unto his Brides, did remark:
                     "I loff it, ven de day fades, into night's dark!"
                     "Ve arise, from our coffins,
                     As we've done, quite, often,
                     Leafing Human-form, for dat, of a BAT; Vot a lark!"

 :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~~~ ;)
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 09, 2009, 04:09:45 AM
Kharis the Mummy wanted to travel
but the roads were all made of sand or gravel
He wanted to ride in an airplane
but he snagged his heel debarking Cairo's train
And his plans all began to unravel

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 10, 2009, 02:09:27 PM
         :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

               THE BANSHEE appeared; giving me a bad Fright;
               Worse, it happened, to be HALLOWEEN NIGHT!
               I said: "Am I dead?!"
               Said she: "No, just overfed!"
               So, I tossed her my candy & ran, swiftly, out of sight!

         :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.





Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 11, 2009, 02:14:44 AM
When my dryer makes klunks, thuds, and knocks,
it's cause a monster's in there, eating my socks
When I told him to quit it
he ate my sweater -- hand knitted!
That's why I keep it in chains with big locks
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 16, 2009, 07:28:12 PM
    :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o

        IVAN'S Dryer is a UMA WONDERLAND, schlock-full, of WHIMSY,
        His dirty Grime, ultra-slimed; a despicable crime, so GRIM... see?!
        The MONSTER, inside,
        Used, to reside,
        In a Fantastic Place, where the BOROGOVES, WERE, ALL, MIMSY!

    :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 16, 2009, 07:46:25 PM
Hey Abbott! I've been a very naughty boy,
I've not used my Limericks like a discarded toy,
So my punishment I'll take like cold gruel,
Yuck I say how can you be so cruel,
I'll kick my toes off the hard ground for I am really a bit coy.



So this is where the true fiends reside,
Both Ivan and the Baron are now by my side,
With my absence from this thread so long,
I'll just just have to make up a very sorry song,
But there you go I let my poor Limerick's slide.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 17, 2009, 12:31:43 AM
Just as Abbott relied on Costello
We're lucky to have you, my fine fellow
Even with limericks' sliding
Maurice could not go on hiding
Else there's just be Tim and I here to bellow
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on July 17, 2009, 07:07:09 AM
Oh my limerick friends I address you
And hope you know I'd never diss you
Just playing music so much
that I fall out of touch
Guess you'd call it a-BAND-onment issue!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 17, 2009, 09:25:59 PM
I should have known Packy'd still be around
He'd never let the thread get run to ground
we're now filed as a game
but we're poetically the same
Though I wouldn't mind if he played us a sound
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 17, 2009, 11:24:29 PM
It's been forty years since that great walk upon the Moon,
I raise my glass for a toast to those brave few who took on the boon,
Mike and Neil plus a man called Buzz ,
Left us with a legasy free from all that fuzz,
Unless it was Moon dust which was lunar and over to soon.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 18, 2009, 07:05:43 AM
Though some nay-sayers scream to the contrary
I believe they stepped foot on the Moon, which is scary
So far from the planet
They brought home lunar granite
And when I stand near those rocks, I get hairy!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 19, 2009, 06:03:24 AM
    :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)

            The phrases: "MOON-SHOT", and, "TO SHOOT THE MOON",
            Despite sounding, alike, are, quite, dissimilar "TUNES";
            TV HORROR and CRAZY IVAN,
            Both, of them, here, are thrivin',
            Even, PACKY PAUL joins our thrall, to create, with us LOONS!

    :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 19, 2009, 09:08:23 AM
Horror movies and toys are very hard to miss,
So what I do is collect as much as I can what bliss,
My shelves are filled and well lined,
But Heaven help me should I ever go blind,
As a hermit I too like the Bride would give a loud hiss. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 19, 2009, 09:16:42 AM
Blind monster collectors are tragic
Not able to watch the old silver screen magic
But they still can feel glee
as most toys are 3-D
So they can enjoy the well-crafted sculpted plastic
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 19, 2009, 02:45:20 PM
    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

             Your Limericks are GENIUS; Poetic, and, Bright;
             Makes me feel, like, a HACK; left, out, in the night,
             I'm, not, a Toy Collector,
             But, a Defender/Protector,
             For your 3-D enjoyment, I'm willing, to fight!

    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 19, 2009, 03:39:38 PM
I collect, but I have little dough
I have to limit my spending just so
I only buy swag
that comes in Happy Meal bags
So I can play with the toys on the go
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 19, 2009, 03:50:16 PM
That last poem was not really straight dope
I do buy certain collectibles; that's how I cope
But my collection is meager
though I'm always quite eager
to add a new statue or toy lycanthrope
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 19, 2009, 06:23:37 PM
Dracula needed to lie in his native soil,
Yet he had poor Renfield do all the toil,
Come on you lazy cur,
And don't forget to call me sir,
Or else my blood will come to a boil.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on July 19, 2009, 08:06:58 PM
There once was a tropic lagoon
Where a chick made a Creature swoon
He wanted to teach her
his mating procedure
But to his charms she was immune
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 20, 2009, 06:30:35 PM
The creature cannot be stopped by mere dolts,
So you had better try aiming your spear bolts,
If you can hit him instead of the fish,
Then his head would look good served up on a dish,
But watch out for the remains to see whatís left and floats.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 20, 2009, 07:26:56 PM
        :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D

                     A MUMMY escaped, from his Tomb, &, was free;
                     His desire, to imbibe some fresh Tana-leaf tea,
                     On that full-moon night,
                     He veered, out-of-sight,
                     In Modesty, to hide his privates, &, privately, pee.

        :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on July 20, 2009, 08:19:54 PM
The Mummy was too tightly wrapped
And neglected to leave a rear flap
When he crapped in his bandages
He found some advantages
When dung beetles cleaned him up STAT

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 20, 2009, 10:12:21 PM
I never thought that I would live to see the day when our limerick thread is reduced to toilet humour! For shame Scatter and the Baron, so on that theme I give you this:


The mummy thought he was hip,
But he so badly needed a little trip,
He held it in as much as he could,
But nature called and he let go as he should,
And his bandages balloned up causing him to flip.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 21, 2009, 08:28:20 AM
The mummy always gets a bad wrap
as if he has feces to get trapped
It's been a long time since he's fed
After all, he's undead
So the old boy don't need to go crap
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 21, 2009, 02:02:59 PM
     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~  :-*
 
          We WEREWOLVES appeared, in the series, HARRY POTTER,
          A WIZARD, Accursed, chased HERMIONE; nearly, got her!
          Bad events turned, out, all, right,
          They, all, got, through the night.
          Next up: Will HOGWARTS play Host, to DRACULA'S DAUGHTER?!

     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :-*
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 22, 2009, 02:17:41 AM
Though I have yet to see the new flick
I've read all the books; I think Harry Potter's kinda slick
Dumbledore once introduced Harry to a vampire
but I don't know if it was a shapeshifter or a flyer
Now a Mummy; that would do the trick
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 22, 2009, 12:38:02 PM
    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;)~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;)

               MUMMY LIMERICKS "hit the spot"; &, even, dust, do trap,
               Even Dancing, if the "Spot", is "Hot"; they take no crap,
               Their bandages may differ;
               Yet, clean, better, than a Swiffer,
               The Best Compliment, one can pay, is: "THAT'S A WRAP!"

    ;D ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;)~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;)
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on July 22, 2009, 02:45:25 PM
Enough about the Mummy, discuss the lycanthrope
whose movie's being ruined by some business-suited dope
that's trading off Rick Baker
for some CGI-bound faker
Poor Talbot's gone from killer to a joke



 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 22, 2009, 04:59:11 PM
I always tread with care and I'm not going to give up hope,
For years now I've wait for a half way decent lycanthrope,
Werewolves need their time in the Moon,
Not to be confused with the Sun which comes out to soon,
Let us attest to a new hairy hero with a great clawed grope.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 22, 2009, 10:23:55 PM
Larry Talbot returns to the silver silver screen soon
Universal's Wolf Man remake is making fans swoon
But the real buzz is about Ron Chaney
and House of the Wolf Man; black and white and grainy
Or I could just wait for the next full moon.

House of the Wolf Man thread
http://www.universalmonsterarmy.com/forum/index.php?topic=5271.new;topicseen#new (http://www.universalmonsterarmy.com/forum/index.php?topic=5271.new;topicseen#new)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 23, 2009, 07:06:14 PM
   >:( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ >:(

                WEREWOLVES are Humans, accursed; beset, by evil needs,
                Transforming, to Wolfish form, they commit heinous deeds,
                Suffering the Torture, damned,
                Into nocturnal hours, cramm'd,
                Fiendish delights, on a Full-Moon night, as their Humanity recedes.

   >:( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ >:(
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 24, 2009, 10:25:07 AM
I've seen a few werewolves that don't cave to instinct
Scott & Todd Howard are both good kids, I thinked
Doc Waggner's retreat could have worked
Had Eddie Quist not been a jerk
Then Timmy & I wouldn't have to see all those shrinks
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on July 26, 2009, 10:01:20 PM
The Creature is big on hygiene.
The Rita has a rotten latrine.
So when he's done fishin
Stops for recondition
At Madam Toussads Gill-A-Clean
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 27, 2009, 07:13:34 PM
    :o ~~~~~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~  ::)

             IM-HOTEP, as THE MUMMY, quite, by accident, returns -
             Limited, by his prospects; he's tied, to what he most yearns;
             "All wrapped, up, in Myself,
             After 3,700 years, 'on the shelf',
             My Undying Love, for Princess ANCK-ES-EN-AMON, still, burns!"

    :o ~~~~~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~~~~~  ::)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 28, 2009, 12:30:00 AM
The Phantom was in a real bind
Christine had become quite a find
But the Operahouse diva
Didn't know when to leave-a
So he sabotaged her, and left her behind
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 28, 2009, 08:28:27 AM
Forry may have been great at being a punster,
And always calling for us to call Chaney the Lonster,
Yet he achieved so much more,
By giving us a magazine we all adore,
Such was the genius of the Ackerrmonster
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on July 28, 2009, 02:41:17 PM
Poor Drac didn't know what to do
Couldn't nod off to sleep, now day two.
He'd been dining on teen
now he buzzed on caffeine
seemed he sucked up too much Mountain Dew
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 30, 2009, 01:19:57 AM
 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                  New Life, Breathed, in our LIMERICK Thread,
                  MAURICE, IVAN & PACKY PAUL; All, UNDEAD;
                  Their brains, wrought, in print,
                  Shows WIT, sharper, than flint,
                  Challenges me, to produce, MORE, 'ere I go, to bed!

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 30, 2009, 09:19:36 AM
While the Baron slips off for a quiet snooze,
We'll continue on until our fingers ooze,
Although he might find the odd chuckle,
It is up to us to tighten the buckle,
And let slip with the wit I may add without the booze.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 30, 2009, 12:16:54 PM
       ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)

                  Day-time, again, I return, to the fray,
                  A Hair-Raising Situation; not, a Toupee;
                  When I get "THE BUG",
                  To cut a LIMERICK "RUG",
                  My UMA Log-In is, where, I like, to PLAY!

       ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OOFY!, B.G.G.




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on July 30, 2009, 12:31:21 PM
Some Creatures moved in to my pool
and at first I though it was cool.
I put in some chlorine
now it's getting boring
they just float belly up as a rule
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 30, 2009, 09:23:37 PM
The big bad wolf went away in a huff,
Why because he was left without much puff,
Those little pigs had seen the Shining,
So with advanced notice they all went off singing,
But the wolf was undetered he still had the billy goat gruff. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 02, 2009, 04:29:43 AM
   ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;)

           CLASSIC MONSTER MOVIES, I COUNT, as Most SPECTACULAR,
           BORIS, BELA & LON, keep my VISION, impeccably MACULAR,
           We SEE, Eye-to-Eye;
           As their Films, fly, by,
          I Love, to watch THEM, as FRANKENSTEIN, THE WOLF MAN & DRACULAR.

   ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~~~~~~ ;)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 02, 2009, 05:53:23 AM
Ah, Baron those movies you feature
Are the best, but what of the Creature?
The Mummy & the Invisible Man are also loved Universally
But The Hunchback &  the Phantom, those two were precursory.
Sorry, didn't mean to sound like a teacher.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on August 02, 2009, 03:35:01 PM
;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                  New Life, Breathed, in our LIMERICK Thread,
                  MAURICE, IVAN & PACKY PAUL; All, UNDEAD;
                  Their brains, wrought, in print,
                  Shows WIT, sharper, than flint,
                  Challenges me, to produce, MORE, 'ere I go, to bed!

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


An egregious snub I've received from The Baron
Over the Monster verse that I've been sharin'
While lauding the verse of others
Among my Monster brothers
Is a mark of shame which I am wearin'
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 02, 2009, 06:19:15 PM
                                 TO SCATTER
    ;D ~~~~~ 2, 4 THE {VINCENT} PRICE, o' 1 ~~~~~ ;D

         My aggrieved, Beloved, Brother, SCATTER,
         What you inscribe, here, to me, doth matter!
         Amongst the BEST, Thy verse;
         Ne'er, relegated, to my worst,
         In this, 'tis my intent, to Praise Ye; not, merely, flatter.

         My olde eyes, sometimes, deceive me;
         And, metered rhyme doth, oft, relieve me,
         Of, all, the facts;
         Such loss, of tact,
         Leaves my SCATTERED WITS, nit-picked, believe me!

    ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 02, 2009, 07:17:05 PM
Poor Baron I feel your pain.
Remembering names is MY bane.
Now that Scatter's included
Let not you be deluded -
Soon you'll be sportin a new BALL AND CHAIN!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on August 02, 2009, 07:20:56 PM
It's too late to fix offending
and your ways are past amending
Ne'er my verse
For better or worse
Upon this thread shall be descending.

But I am open to bribes.  ;D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 02, 2009, 08:18:32 PM
Scat-Man, I have no bribe money
But I hear you can attract The Fly better with honey
If I throw you some praise
will that buy a few days?
I happen to find you quite funny
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on August 02, 2009, 08:30:40 PM
I'm really not truly offended
Nor do I want the thread upended
Just my sense of humor
Funny as a tumor
Look how low I have descended! LOL!!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 02, 2009, 11:00:10 PM
Oops the Baron's trod on someones toes,
Now we'll hear it all year the poor souls woes,
We've been threatened beat and even the odd stake,
Yet the wit has fled forgeting our friend Scatter was a mistake,
So lets all settle down for a friendly game of dominoes.


Tim have you set a date yet for the big day,
As I'll wish you the best come what may,
I know that I'm not alone showing interest,
As the day arrives for you and Beth with pride in my breast,
Let us hope for that first dance you both get to sway.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 03, 2009, 08:29:31 PM
SCATTER writ: "But I am open to bribes."
                       "Grin... It's my only weakness."

    ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)

                        My Dear Brother, The Inconsolable SCATTER,
                        I am sorry, if I've left your ego, in tatters,
                        I'm clued, into your Vibes,
                        Like DRACULA'S BRIBES,
                        Or, FRANKENSTEIN'S BRIDE, I reply, with snappy patter!

    ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 05, 2009, 08:27:06 PM
    :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

                 THE VAMPIRE arose, from his COFFIN,
                 Amid a vile fit, of sneezin' and coughin'
                 Allergic, to his Native Soil,
                 His UNDEAD blood did boil,
                 'Cos, "These symptoms happen, too often!"

    :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 05, 2009, 09:14:12 PM
Just think of the poor mummy all that sun and no tan,
He is so wrapped up in himself that he forgot his fan,
The bandages start to tighten,
Leaving a very grumpy mummy to frighten,
Why oh why could he not have been the invisible man.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on August 07, 2009, 09:45:14 PM
In the new remake of The Creech
He's given the power of speech
"Quit shootin' yer guns
I just want some fun
With the sexy broad on the beach!"
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 08, 2009, 05:58:29 AM
The Invisible Man was quite sleezy
Since he wore no clothes; it was easy
But his voyeurist life
was not devoid of strife
He caught colds every time it got breezy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 09, 2009, 10:41:00 AM
The Mystery men had their very own invisible boy,
But the only drawback was he so coy,
So he needed the crew to look away,
For his powers to come on persay,
And as we found out he never even got his own toy.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 09, 2009, 02:34:01 PM
           ;) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;)

                      MORE LIMERICKS; so, jovially Tongue-In-Cheek,
                      Despite their owners' having snouts, or, beaks,
                      Keen acuity, of sight and smell,
                      Provides GAMY Airs, of verbal hell,
                      Whiff the CARRION STENCH, as we play HYDE-AND-REEK!

           ;) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 10, 2009, 04:21:51 PM
Oh I'm going into a real foul mood,
Because the Baron has involved me within his brood,
Look he even used my  alter ego name Hyde,
Hyde and reek he cried looking all snide,
he had better watch out in case he finds himself sued.



Here's a foul joke for the Baron, Why was he not invited to Dracula's castle?   Because he kept on BARON-ing money. (Groan)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 10, 2009, 07:04:36 PM
"The Good Old Days" ( yes theme limericks)

When Mom would call "Packy time for bed..."
Dad said "Finish homework instead!"
I knew what he meant,
and with Mom now content,
whispered "Let's go glue on Frankenstein's head".

The lady at Kresge's was mean...
"You kids put back that bad magazine!"
And though I abhorred her
She still got my quarter
(if she owned the rubber spider machine)








Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on August 11, 2009, 06:35:19 AM
The man with the back of a camel
Quasimodo the Dromedary mammal
Tonight he will crush
that kid with the brush
that covered him in Testor's Enamel.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 11, 2009, 04:26:46 PM
Speaking of Quasimodo with a cheerful little song,
Of he went into the deepest part of the jungle then what a pong,
What's this he cried,
The stench of which he nearly died,
He had trod in the dung of an ape called Kong. 



Well you can't say that my limericks aren't kingsized.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 13, 2009, 03:23:46 AM
    ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~  :o

                   THESE TOPICS OF CAPRICE-CORN,
                   Star-studded LIMERICKS, sans porn,
                   Won't HYDE, 'cos, I LUV it;
                   Thy Brains, do I covet,
                   Reading them, on the verge, o' new morn!

    ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~~~~  :o
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 13, 2009, 08:07:23 PM
The baron's words hit me so deep,
For he knows that I'm not some creep,
Why writing these limericks are a release,
And a joy for some moderators to police,
Before I can get into a good nights sleep.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 14, 2009, 06:33:04 AM
I'd say we all suffer a sickness
To think up such odd limerick-ness
Monsters on the brain
That ain't really sane
But to make these lines rhyme; that's the trick-ness
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 15, 2009, 10:52:18 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o

          My LIMERICKS might strike you, as  verbose;
          Drag you, into sad moods, dour and morose,
          Of THE MONSTERS, I write,
          Ev'ry night; quite, a blight,
          'Tho', not, so much, of a fright, as GLENN CLOSE!

 :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 20, 2009, 03:39:08 PM
Frankenstein's Maria was our little flower,
Poor thing ended up drowned beyond  the tower,
Although he was misunderstood,
It was no reason for him to be torched with wood,
The monster's world had turned quite sour.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 20, 2009, 04:50:24 PM
When the Bride first met her would-be groom
She couldn't stand to be in the same room
Dejected, the Monster then said
to his maker, "We belong dead"
And turned the castle into their fiery tomb.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 20, 2009, 06:03:02 PM
The month is coming when the wolfsbane is in full bloom,
Poor Larry is at the end of his tether and filled with gloom,
What arcane secret can cure his plight,
No there is nothing for him only to take flight,
His answers may lie far afield before his very doom.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 22, 2009, 04:40:49 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o

               LARRY TALBOT'S Full-Moon "situation" gets very HAIRY;
               FRANKENSTEIN'S BRIDE refuses, her Suitor, to MARRY;
               COUNT DRACULA drove RENFIELD, quite, BATS;
               DR. VITUS WERDEGAST, afraid, of BLACK CATS;
               THE MUMMY, who'd kill, for TANA LEAF TEA, cannot stay BURIED!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~ :o
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 25, 2009, 07:42:03 PM
    :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'(

              Beloved Brother, MICHAEL THOMAS, has the Respect, of us, all,
              He will, never, be forgotten, by MONSTER KIDS, Great, or, small;
              To HEAVEN DIVINE, he's been Born,
              In LOVE, EVERNOW; so, do, not, mourn;
              Now, Complete, He dwells, in LOVE'S Perfection; as on Earth, 'twas His Call.

    :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~~~~~~ :'(
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2009, 01:12:46 PM
 :'( ~~~~~ :( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :(

           I don't know where everyone is,
           They've left me, alone, with this biz,
           I, bravely, write on,
           Muster ;) up GREY'S POU-PON,
           All this practice makes me a LIMERICK WIZ!

 :'( ~~~~~ :( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :(
                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on August 31, 2009, 07:20:26 AM
It's true; the limerick game's got a wiz
And the Baron is it, yes he is!
With a wave of his wand
he rhymes "Grey's Pou-Pon"
Even when the thread's lost some of its fizz
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on September 02, 2009, 02:40:42 PM
There once was an actor named Bela
Who was a Hungarian fella
He hated the rain
And often would deign
To use a bat as an umbrella
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on September 04, 2009, 04:11:11 PM
Alone I sit my factory empty
The clocks I stare at sorely tempt me.
"Vile minute-hand-
You'd get me canned!"
No leaving early on 4 Septemby.


I changed my mind GOODBYE!~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 04, 2009, 04:56:56 PM
Poor old Packy is waiting for his work to expire,
But what he did not know the clockface looked dire,
He was plotting Packy's demise,
What would happen to our friend we can but surmise,
Packy jumps with a start and pulls a gun bang goes the clock spire!

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 04, 2009, 06:36:25 PM
It's the start of a holiday weekend
Don't know if Packy's off Monday, but I can pretend
So he started it early
Perhaps wrong, but surely
the work day just needed to end.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 05, 2009, 05:56:44 AM
      ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :-*

                 As, again, this passing Summer season ceaseth,
                 So, in our brains, too, shalt Autumn increaseth,
                 ALL-HALLOW-E'EN'S approacheth,
                 CLASSIC MONSTERS encroacheth,
                 Eggs, unpoached; as our LIMERICKS do teaseth!

      ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :-*
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 05, 2009, 10:17:45 PM
Eggs, no no; that's for the Spring!
We're fixin' to celebrate a whole different thing!
In Autumn I wear wolf attire
Be it a wolf that is red, grey, or dire
And that Autumn moon just makes me sing.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 06, 2009, 06:42:52 PM
    :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

                 Br'er IVAN; I agree, this Season, before us,
                 Is time, to cite, in joyous Howling Chorus;
                 All colour, indeed, is, eerily, dire,
                 If lit, by JACK O' LANTERN'S Fire;
                 Caked, we, in muck & mire; not, neat & clean, like BORIS!

    :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: jerosaur on September 07, 2009, 06:40:43 AM
Even a man who's pure in heart
and says his prayers at night,
is probably a wimp.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 07, 2009, 11:11:37 AM
Jerosaur, welcome to the poetry thread
Like the title says, Limericks Ahead
your verse may not match
That's okay, but here's the catch;
Dis the Wolf Man, and you might wind up dead
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: LastOfTheV8Interceptors on September 08, 2009, 02:21:29 AM
Limericks!

There once was a fella named Larry
Who was really more gentle than scary
But when wolfsbane would bloom
Under light of the moon
He would get really creepy and hairy!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 08, 2009, 05:07:23 PM
Welcome to the Limerick thread,
Once bitten you'll now be full of dread.
From the greats of bygone Universal,
To the horrors of Hammer for your perusal,
The most fortunate thing is you're here to tread.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 12, 2009, 05:53:20 AM
     ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~  ::)

                        New LIMERICK Recruits, abound, like flies,
                        Writers, Old and New, establish firm ties,
                        Amid this variable thread,
                        We examine our heads,
                        Out-pouring our hearts, lest this thread dies!

     ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~  ::)
                   
                               THANKS, BROTHERS, IVAN & MAURICE,
                                   ... For Welcoming the Newbies!
... JEROSAUR, Glad, to have you, on-board! A Contributory Bon Mot, closer, to HAIKU, than LIMERICK; howe'er, Thou art welcome, to empty Thy brain, of such initial meanderings, as Ye warm-up, to the task, of producing LIMERICKS, like WOLF-BANE, in full Bloom!
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
        Jerosaur New Recruit * Posts: 8   Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
                 ę Reply #814 on: September 07, 2009, 06:40:43 AM Ľ

                                Even a man who's pure in heart
                                and says his prayers at night,
                                is probably a wimp.

www.associatedcontent.com/article/2136503/best_halloween_movies_universally_speaking.html (http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2136503/best_halloween_movies_universally_speaking.html)

                       .................................................................................

... Also, WELCOME, LastOfTheV8Interceptors!
                                       New Recruit  * Posts: 7
                         "What weird accident of science created it?!"
                ę Reply #816 on: September 08, 2009, 02:21:29 AM Ľ

                                                 Limericks!
                           There once was a fella named Larry
                           Who was really more gentle than scary
                           But when wolf's-bane would bloom
                           Under light of the moon
                           He would get really creepy and hairy!
"We shall see that at which dogs howl in the dark, and that at which cats prick up their ears after midnight." - H. P. Lovecraft

... A stunning array, of Classic Monster-Kid knowledge, Literary depth, and weird science! More, as Ye please.
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 13, 2009, 07:35:14 AM
Always good to see newcomers writing
Much better than when the Baron comes biting!
Wipe your feet on the doormat,
don't matter the format,
and stick around for more poetic frighting.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 15, 2009, 09:05:40 PM
    :o ~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

         What could be more telling, than THE AUTUMNAL EQUINOX,
         To miss its Meaning, is, to have BRAINS, like, a BOX, OF ROCKS,
         ALL-HALLOWS'-E'EN, the Reason,
         For our Spook-tacular Season,
         Wherein, our IMAGINATION, like, DRACULA'S Castle, is UNLOCKED!

    :o ~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 16, 2009, 05:56:08 PM
In honour of our late friend Meek,
We lost a friend and companion that week,
Yet we all agree it was her wit we miss,
As we always had to watch our P's and Q's what bliss,
Onwards we trod for limerick's witty and not too weak.

God bless Linda Miller you were truly one of us.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 20, 2009, 05:23:58 AM
   :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-*

        BELOVEDS, MEEK & MICHAEL THOMAS, of Our CLASSIC PUZZLE, MAJOR PIECES,
        Like UNCLE FORRY, Whose FABLED STORY, Our MONSTER-TRIBE, INCREASES,
        BEN CHAPMAN, Our Favourite CREATURE, "HOME, AT LAST!"
        Along, with SARA'S "SPARKY"; SOULS, of THE HIGHEST CLASS,
        With BORIS, BELA, LON & All, To Inhabit THE REALM-DIVINE, Where TRUE PEACE, IS!

   :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-*
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 26, 2009, 07:24:33 PM
      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

                In CASTLE DRACULA, THE COUNT spake, unto JONATHAN HARKER:
                "In my veins flows Great Blood; of ATTILA, the Hun, &, The Berserker!"
                "My Ancestry is War-like, of Olde,
                Prized, more, than riches or gold -
                With my Curse, I'm the Worst; yet, the best, of the devil's workers!"

      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 28, 2009, 02:27:10 AM
 ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :D

                        DRAC, FRANK, and, WOLFIE, became, quite, CHUMMY;
                        They met, at DRAC'S Castle, for a game, of GIN RUMMY,
                        If points, they hoped, to score, some,
                        They knew, they'd need a Foursome,
                        Who'd they enlist? You guessed it... THE MUMMY!

 ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :D
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 03, 2009, 06:48:52 AM
      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

               HALLOWEEN is, once, again, set, to APPROACH;
               THE MONSTERS arrive, by plane, or, by COACH,
               VAMPIRES Fly, by NIGHT,  ;)
               When Traffic is, quite, LIGHT,
               They stop, "FOR A BITE"; on Necks, Unsuspecting, ENCROACH!

      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 03, 2009, 12:26:13 PM
October is here at last
Though I hope the 31st ain't too fast
My planned celebration
Of this festive occasion
Is ideally a month-long repast
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 11, 2009, 12:18:16 AM
Tis the season to be jolly for our good Baron is going to marry,
We are all rejoicing even our friend depressedLarry,
May the day be joyous for both ,
As they take that marriage oath,
So come one come all and don't let anyone tarry.


When is the big day Tim, as I would like to wish both you and Elizabeth all the best for your forth coming marriage.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 11, 2009, 03:41:40 AM
BELOVED BROTHERS, IVAN & MAURICE, & UMA FANG-MILY,

         ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D
 
               My "Plate" has, of late, been, quite, "over-full",
               So many great People, and, Situations, to extol,
               Yes, sent, from ABOVE,
               My BETH, Life-long LOVE,
               To confess, all; my Time's Use, still, is beyond, my control!

         ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D

          A full "CATCH-UP", by ALL-HALLOW'S-E'EN!
          Stay Tuned! {'Cos, few, love you, when yer out o' tune!}
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.




 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 11, 2009, 08:45:49 PM
           ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;)

                   OCTOBER has, ever, been my Most Special Month,
                   Comprised, mainly, o' a varied, influential, Bunch,
                   A Kaleidoscope, o' Special days,
                   In colours, vibrant, lacking greys;
                   B'DAYS: BELA'S, ST. FRANCIS & mine, packs, quite, a Punch!

           ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
                   
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 12, 2009, 11:41:02 AM
If Halloween sees the Baron on-line,
I'll know he's not in his right mind
For that day in his life
best be spent with his WIFE!
No matter how he might norm'ly be inclined
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 15, 2009, 02:48:49 AM
 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                   DEAR BORIS always said: "HALLOWEEN is my busy Season";
                   Like, Our Hero, so, too, me, for the very same Reason,
                   My Wife is most understanding,
                   My 31st Celebration, demanding;
                   Devoid, of Conflict, of Interest, I shan't be shot, for Treason!

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 20, 2009, 01:18:08 PM
 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

                My LIMERICKS are bad, but, things could be worse, eh?
                Not, adverse, to adding verse, in making my curse pay!
                I'm, at least, a half-wit, with words,
                So, some, are bound, to be turds,
                Wot the hey! I'm old; still, bold, &, Friday is my 61st BIRTHDAY!

                HAPPY BIRTHDAY, #127, BELOVED, BELA LUGOSI!
                I Pray, that your EVERNOW, turned, out, to be ROSY,
                May the Gifted Talent, that you shared,
                Grant you, GOD'S Blessing, squared,
                From all evil, be spared, and, in HEAVEN, be cozy!

 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 21, 2009, 12:50:51 AM
Sixty-One!  Surely you jest!
You couldn't be over Forty... 45 at best!
Unless you've warped time and space
(remember, we've met face to face)
You must have drank the elixir vitae; no jest!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 23, 2009, 03:58:06 PM
A late Birthday wish for my friend,
(not paying attention - aGAIN!)
Of kindness a cup
I'll pour you - drink up!
I'll keep pouring til you say when.

Now lest we be fooling ourselves...
just eyeball the Halloween shelves.
What used to be scary
Now joyous and merry
and monsters have turned into elves.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 25, 2009, 10:34:50 AM
I went to Micheal's last night
hoping to find some cheap frights
The clearance rack was lame
I've just myself to blame
for not going before the 31st was in sight
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 25, 2009, 11:27:19 AM
Ivan just what did you have in mind
for frightening things you to find?
I won't pretend
I have much to send
But to help you I'd be much inclined.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 25, 2009, 11:40:21 AM
I was just looking for a set for my Halloween Village People
A new vampire castle or haunted church steeple
I won't be home on this month's 31st
so my decorum really couldn't be worse
No need for you to risk shipping costs so steep... el
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 27, 2009, 10:06:05 PM
         ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

                  Just a QUICK-LIME-rick note, o' BIRTHDAY THANKS;
                  I've been 'away', but, not, for my usual PRANKS,
                  My BELOVED BETH, is, EVERNOW, my BRIDE,
                  During Our WEDDING Ceremony, I CRIED;
                  The Day, prior, My BIRTHDAY, she gave me 62 SPANKS!

                                   {"& 1, to grow on!" She said!}

         ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 29, 2009, 02:42:16 AM
        :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)

                     ALL-HALLOW'S-E'EN; "Full Steam, Ahead!"
                     For our singular Celebration, of all things, Undead;
                     DRAC & FRANK & WOLFMAN, too,
                     MUMMY Dearest & Witch's Brew,
                     I feel the change - Oh, NOOOO! ARRRROOOOUUUUU!

        :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on October 29, 2009, 03:02:17 PM
Baron the Wolf, Beth the Bunny.
The glow of their Love warm and sunny.
So now Timothy,
repeat after me:
Yes Dear, Yes Dear, Coming Honey!

Please accept our lame e-congratulations to you both, comprised  of bytes from the heart.
The Kolocs
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 31, 2009, 11:13:46 PM
It's midnight now, All Saint's Day starts
My Halloween passed like a stale dry fart
While Tim and Beth became man and wife
I spent another long day of my life
on a ship; sometimes this Navy thing smarts.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 01, 2009, 07:32:04 AM
            ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

                 My Dear Brothers, PACKY PAUL & CRAZY IVAN,
                 HALLOWEEN'S passed, yet, we're, still, thrivin',
                 Services, of LOVE, truly, rendered,
                 Knits HEARTS, as ONE, Remembered,
                 No matter; time or distance; on boat or wivin'!

            ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 08, 2009, 04:09:23 PM
 :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o

                   THE HUNTER'S MOON rose, nights, ago,
                   Bathing the Earth, in her eerie glow,
                   Perplexed, like, your average Loon,
                   I flipped a coin: a} Howl, at the moon,
                   Or, b} As the Name implies, as a HUNTER, "grow"! ;)

 :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :o
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 09, 2009, 10:55:51 AM
Baron, your suggestion to 'grow'
made me think of two ways that could go;
Growing LARGE is reserved for Amore
but growing UP would be such a bore
If you meant the latter; say it ain't so!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 12, 2009, 03:38:45 AM
        :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ 8) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;D ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ 8) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;D

                 BR'ER IVAN has suggestively offered two main routes:
                 For "GROW"; "AMORE", or, "UP", which he touts,
                 The obvious third,
                 Unspoken, concurred:
                 As a HUNTING WEREWOLF, Fur, Claws and Fangs, is what I'm about!

        :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ 8) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;D ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ 8) ~~~ :o ~~~ ;D
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on November 12, 2009, 11:58:03 PM
I never think of a lycanthrope's change
as growth, or as anything strange
I may get somewhat bigger
but I'm still me, I figure
just so long as I never get mange
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on November 13, 2009, 07:43:46 PM
I am so pleased that the baron and Beth are all a swoon,
It must be rough staring at the November Moon,
While waiting for the hunters to past,
When given the all clear run until you are aghast,
So don't you worry it will be over soon,
Then you will be as light as air like a new balloon.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 16, 2009, 08:01:18 PM
 ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o

               Ah, our Brother, TV HORROR, Wise Sage o' IRELAND,
               Who contributes, mightily, ever willing, to TRY, AGAIN,
               Our LIMERICK Cause, marches on,
               Oft, with more Brain, than Brawn,
               Cheering, BORIS, BELA and LON, from AREA 51, or, FIRE ISLAND!

 ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on November 29, 2009, 06:41:25 AM
     ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)

                     Late November's Full Moon is waxing, once again,
                     Like Tummies, a-bustin', by Thanksgiving's end,
                     Our LIMERICK Gang is remiss,
                     For Obvious Puns; must be "off-List",
                     Howe'er, I persist, in HOWLLL-IDAY Sharing, wi' UMA FRIENDS!

     ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 11, 2009, 02:03:23 AM
 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

     "Whoever is bitten, by a WEREWOLF, & lives, becomes a WEREWOLF himself,"
       Whoever is bitten, by SANTA'S Little Helpers, becomes an ELF himself,
       The first option; Murderous,
       The second; most Virtuous,
    Since {Ahem - DRUMROLL, Please!} "the LORD ELFS those who ELFS themselves!"

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.  

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 19, 2009, 06:27:27 AM
     :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o

              Winter's deluge has hit us, covered us, with tons, of snow,
              Shifts shapes, familiar, now, lost, beneath their icy glow;
              Transformed trees; frosting bedecked,
              Images, by Currier and Ives, unchecked,
              We know, that, Spring awaits - a mere 150 Days, to go!

     :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o
                                    MERRIE CHRISTMAS
                  & a MOST HAPPY & SAFE HOLIDAY SEASON
              & NEW YEAR, A.D. 2010, to OUR UMA FANG-MILY!
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on December 20, 2009, 10:32:15 AM
Although some members may be five and dimers,
I can't help feeling that some may be mimer's,
However like the immortal Kong,
During this holiday season we can't go wrong,
Gathering at conventions and sharing stories like a bunch of old timers.


All the very best to the forum members and seasons greetings to you Baron Tim and Beth. No, I have not forgotten 1van and Packy and the rest of group of rhymers for you are the very model of the above five and dimers.     
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 22, 2009, 11:29:31 PM
      ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*

                         Whene'er  I am down, and, require a lift,
                         Through these Limericks, I, oft-times, sift,
                         My Beloved Friends, of the UMA,
                         Whose past puns, "make my day",
                         Spurring me, onward, to add just one more Gift!

      ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ;D ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*

      Nearing 20,000 Reads, Gang; let's keep on keepin' on! MERRIE CHRISTMAS!
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Scatter on December 22, 2009, 11:44:39 PM
Unwillingly absent I've been....
Haven't rhymed since I don't know when.

But now that I'm back
On my wife's nifty Mac

I'll be spinnin' bad poems again.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 25, 2009, 05:53:26 AM
      8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8)

             "MERRIE CHRISTMAS, To ALL", Moi UMA Greeting,  ;D
             Hope your Holiday's Glo-or-r-rious {albeit, quite, fleeting}; :'(
             And, Welcome Back, SCATTER, :o
             Both, Former, and, Latter, ::)
             Keep on Cyber-Limericking, 'til, in the flesh, we'll be meeting!  ;)

      8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8) YULE 8)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on December 30, 2009, 09:37:02 AM
Tis the season, to rejoin this thread
Though I'm sure most had hoped I'd be dead
I've been on the road all season
But that's not a good reason
To abandon my UMA friends
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on December 31, 2009, 03:57:57 AM
 ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;)

           We've arrived, once, again, at NEW YEAR'S EVE,
           Still, MONSTER KIDS, who REJOICE and BELIEVE,
           With LOVE, in the UNIVERSAL CLASSICS;
           BORIS, BELA & LON - Thanks, for The MAGIC!
           &, for SCATTER & IVAN, who give THIS Thread a REPRIEVE!

 ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;)
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 02, 2010, 04:51:06 PM
 ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

           WOWSERS! Now, Sirs {& Madams}, 'tis A.D. 2-Thousand & Ten!
           A Blue Moon blew, out, the olde year, but, not, all, our Friends!
           Celebrate & Cherish, our Legends, of Yore,
           Reminiscences, to remember, Forevermore,
           Their "Work" worked, for us, then, as well as, in this Millennium!

 ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 02, 2010, 08:24:02 PM
For this new year I wish you all happiness and health
This doesn't necessarily mean material means or wealth
Just give me more horror movies;
DEAD ALIVE (1992) was quite groovy --
The best film I've seen this year, if I say so myself
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 03, 2010, 03:57:44 PM
 :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;)

           Two WERE-WOLVES wrote Limericks, quite oft,
           With spry style, and, hats, which they doffed.
           Keep, on, writing, they will,
           Similar, to a VIAGRA Pill,
           To "get a rise", from UMA Troops' Mental Exhaust.

 :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;)
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 05, 2010, 07:19:46 AM
"Getting a Rise" could still be controversial
Even knowing the Baron isn't being perversal
Vampires and zombies may rise from their graves
The Frankenstein's monster might rise up on stage
They all seem to rise; in fact it looks quite Universal
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 08, 2010, 06:10:02 AM
      IN HONOUR, OF UNCLE FORRY, LINDA "MEEK" MILLER, & MIKE "YGOR" THOMAS

       ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

               Since 'twas begun, this Creatively Wacky Thread hath spun,
               From UMA Hearts & Bowels, LIMERICKS, of MONSTER PUNS,
               A smattering, of less, than 300, more, reads,
               Art needful, to make our Limericks succeed,
               To the 20,000 Mark, by ST. PADDY'S DAY; let's continue our run!

       ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 08, 2010, 07:44:00 AM
Two-Hundred and fifty more readers are needed
As the good Baron's has heart-felt pleaded
And it might be kinda nice
for some folks to visit us twice
Even so, it may take us a while, so please be seated
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 10, 2010, 04:16:39 AM
 ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D

             Brother IVAN, and, I, in reprise, will tell you no lies;
             In our faces, the multiple pies, of Limericks gone by,
             Fat-free, NUT-ricious; really, quite, Yummy,
             Like diet Tana-Leaf Tea, to KHARIS, THE MUMMY,
             Re-awaken your Pun-sense, with Ye Olde UMA College Try!

 ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 11, 2010, 07:52:08 AM
175 is the remainder to meet
So come by for the tea; stay for the meet-n-greet
Will have groovy snacks
like brains... by the sacks!
So who wants something yummy to eat?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 15, 2010, 08:37:35 PM
            :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o

                 Our Bizarre UMA Topic: WARNING: IRISH LIMERICKS AHEAD,
                 Nearing its 2nd Anniversary, has 19,904 times, been read,
                 'Tis a UMA FANG-MILY Thing,
                 So, go on, take a wild fling;
                 We'll be entranced, as if, by DRACULA'S Ring, or, Hypnotic Eyes, UNDEAD!

            :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o
                                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 17, 2010, 07:22:27 AM
The new Wolf Man movie is coming this February
We're all looking forward to it, though it ain't our 'classic' Larry
The story has been altered
I hope the changes haven't faltered
But I know I'll see it, so long as it's hairy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 22, 2010, 09:03:32 PM
   :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::)

             DRACULA told FRANK, why, he decided, not, to tarry,
             Lest, with full moon a'bloom, they "meet", with LARRY,
             "'Tvas, back, in 1948, ven, last, ve met;
             The trauma, of vich, remains, vith me, yet!
             It drove me, bats; but, I haf no regrets; that DEAL, BIG & HAIRY!"

   :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::)
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY & THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD-D!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 22, 2010, 09:22:10 PM
Magilla may be a gigantic gorilla,
But he ain't the size of Godzilla,
Now if only he took the odd wheat cake,
The crowds would be running for Pete's sake,
Instead he grossed out on ice cream filled with vanilla.


As for my werewolf friends keeping this thread alive.
I say well done for it could have taken a dive,
So feel glad to give a great big howl,
For us mere mortals have run somewhat fowl,
By missing our scratch of that irritating limerick hive
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Uncula on January 24, 2010, 06:46:32 AM


  The limericks at the Army are fun.
I try to read every one.
There are so many.
you could
 almost build a city,
there is l
there are plelent of  mud for cement



  Uncula
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 24, 2010, 04:47:26 PM
UMA Sun, Jan 24th, AD 2009 4:25 AM
Quote of the moment: My name's McDougal, now where are my shipments?
    ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

            A & C MEET FRANKENSTEIN is a "Quote of the moment":
            "My name's McDougal, now where are my shipments?"
            A serendipitous nod,
            To my previous Laud -
            Cosmically Confluent; both, odd, and, quite, trenchant!

    ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY THE BARON & BARONESS & FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 24, 2010, 04:51:05 PM
 ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D

                 WOWSERS - And, Thanks; 'tis, just, like Olde Times!
                 TV HORROR, our Irish MAURICE, adding his rhymes!
                 With UNCULA, &, IVAN,
                 We're cookin', again,
                 MARCH 17th is a-looming, so, I'm sure, will our Friends!

 ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 24, 2010, 08:18:06 PM
Thank you Baron for the mention,
Considering I don't come with a pension,
So now I'm all a fluster,
Sitting here at home in Ulster,
Watching the thread with clenched fist tension. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Wicked Lester on January 24, 2010, 08:26:45 PM
Can't say I am much of a fan of this thread. I'll try my hand anyway. Something I came u[ with a bit over 30 years ago.

You lie in bed
you shake with fear
You see it's eyes
It's coming near
You scream in terror
You dread for your life
because of the Doll
with the butcher knife
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 24, 2010, 08:39:50 PM
That's just what I needed Lester as I go to bed,
You making up such a scary poem filled with dread,
Now all I'll have to do is wait another thirty years,
Before your creative juices again reduce me to tears,
So from this moment all my doll's will leave my dog well fed.   
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 25, 2010, 07:14:51 PM
I don't only blame poor Lester's doll
Those creepy things sell in my local mall
All the toys are demonic
that you find at Hot Topic
So there's a plethora; we can't fight them all!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 26, 2010, 04:11:48 AM
          :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)

                       Your Poem was, exceptionally, WICKED, LESTER,
                       DOLLS, WITH KNIVES! - Oh, please, don't TEST 'ER!
                       Better, to BUTCHER LIMERICKS, instead,
                       To fill our UMA Barracks, with dread,
                       We'll turn the beds, from head to head, then, sleep, with UNCLE FESTER!

          :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on January 26, 2010, 03:24:42 PM
Though we Fester I'd rather not sleep with 'im
Call me crazy but I prefer the Addams women
Morticia's a hottie
And Wednesday's just naughty
But Grandmama's the one I'd most likely be given.

(Though let's be honest, sleeping with COUSIN IT would be great for those cold winter nights)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 27, 2010, 02:12:57 AM
               :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*

                          Who'da thunk, with Readership, of over 20,000-Plus,
                          That, this Thread would Re-Birth, with Poems & Pus!
                          That, we'd revert, to High Gear,
                          For which I proclaim: "Hear, Hear!",
                          As we add, new LIMERICK Discourses, Digests, of Disgust! 

               :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 27, 2010, 10:27:37 PM
While the Baron is going at it full steam,
With all this talk of pus and disgust I could scream,
Even while droolin at his foul limericks,
He has the touch of a master full of lame tricks,
Leaving us fiends to think that life is but a dream.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 29, 2010, 04:08:11 AM
      :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D

                     TV HORROR is a UMA LIMERICK POET, of note,
                     I love the way his thoughts and words float,
                     So IRISH, his written "Voice",
                     Reminds me, of JAMES JOYCE;
                     I GRANT you, "ULYSSES", is his work, which I, GENERAL LEE, quote.

      :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on January 29, 2010, 01:30:13 PM
To be compared to James Joyce,
All I can do is quietly rejoice,
The baron doth honour me,
And I say right back at thee,
Before finding my lost rhyming voice.


When Renfield did the Borgo pass approach,
He was met at midnight by a large black coach,
Altough he was wary as a fly,
he could not pin point the reason why,
Is this Dracula's carriage but the driver was beyond reproach.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on January 31, 2010, 11:31:23 PM
 :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'(

                QUASIMODO, The Hunchback, had his "ups, and, downs",
                Swinging, from gargoyle, to parapet, at Notre Dame,
                Yet, no Clown, he; rather, Lover, supreme,
                To win ESMERALDA'S Heart; Ah! His life's dream,
                When she died, his valiant heart broke; in tears, he drown.

 :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :'(
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 03, 2010, 02:04:50 PM
The largest, brightest full moon of the year
that will be seen in this hemisphere
was in the sky Saturday night
but the snow clouds obscured it from sight
and instead of a werewolf, I looked like a yeti, I fear!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 03, 2010, 08:11:05 PM
Poor Ivan missed his wolfish calling,
By the clouds filled with snow falling,
Not to be undone he proved ready,
By becoming instead a growling yeti,
Such is the UMA spirit to go a  mauling.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 05, 2010, 04:35:47 AM
 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o

                 The Full Moon, arising, fills me, with dread,
                 For, Change, I must, sure, as blood is red.
                 Yet, when, in Arctic climate,
                 I transform, into Primate,
                 With 6 months leeway, "Not, YET!" I Said!

 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 05, 2010, 04:46:20 AM
                                HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ROBERT TAYLOR!
                                -----------------------------------
      ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :)

              Herein, I salute, our Dear Brother, UMA ELDER, ROBERT TAYLOR,
              The greatest thing, since sliced white bread, or, e'en, NORMAN MAILER,
              Sage, of multiple talents, I know,
              Oft, with SARA KARLOFF, in tow,
              Their Bond is so strong, that, I know, he won't, ever, fail her!

      ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :)
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 05, 2010, 10:11:57 PM
Like all things uninvited I fear the ghost,
Creaking floorboards in an empty house the most,
While bumps in the night gives one a good fright,
I always end up searching first to the left and then to the right,
But nothing is there or is there unseen that I can fearfully boast.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 08, 2010, 02:54:11 AM
 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o

             We prevent the LIMERICK Thread's slide, too far, down this List,
             With HAUNTING refrains, replayed, a GHASTLY, Perpetual KISS;
             Whether, RENEVANT Instances, of Clever WIT,
             Or, Halved, unmitigated pieces, of s--t;
             Like the GHOST, mentioned, above, DOOMED, to, NEVERMORE, Quit!

 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 08, 2010, 10:58:01 PM
In honour of Lon Chaney junior.


Poor misbegotten canis Lupus beast,
Cry as you must at the moons feast,
Run free while your hairy feet can,
And don't blow a fuse as dynamo Dan.
Just sit back and let that change effect you least.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 10, 2010, 07:27:41 AM
Though a holiday weekend I'll grapple
with traffic as I hit the Big Apple
Already bought my ticket
For the MOMA Tim Burton Exhibit
which I suspect I'll like better than Snapple(tm)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 10, 2010, 08:58:22 PM
    ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::)

                 Br'er IVAN - TIM BURTON you say? I want my MOMA!
                 BEETLEGEUSE, A very enchanting Comedic Drama,
                 Which my Bride & I watched, tonight,
                 TIM directed; quite, the frightful sight!
                 His later DEPP-th, LEE-way, askew - a wonderful WONKA!

    ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::)
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 10, 2010, 11:00:12 PM
Tim Burton is a director those style I can follow,
Even when the Wonka child blew up like a large mallow,
Casting Christopher Lee yet again as somewhat sinister,
And giving us Beetlejuice in need of a wedding minister,
Yet my favorite by far is his brilliant Sleepy hollow.

Good luck on your trip Ivan and don't forget to buy a programme as a memento of this wondrous visit.







Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 16, 2010, 06:51:46 PM
         :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o

                 Poor DR. JEKYLL, alas, was, in, quite, a pickle,
                 His "experiment", Scientific, proved, quite, fickle;
                 With no one, to confide in,
                 Whilst, as HYDE, he was hidin',
                 When HYDE died, JEKYLL'S Genius wasn't worth a plugged Nickel!

         :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 16, 2010, 07:54:49 PM
While the baron has left my Hyde reeling,
Poor doctor Jekyll can't help feeling,
That there are more things in life than a potion,
Even though nightly it might lead to a motion,
Which could be embarrassing for a man sheding and peeling.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 16, 2010, 08:27:17 PM
I indeed enjoyed my Manhattan trip
Though the weekend was spent all in Newark, where I slept
On Monday we saw the MOMA exhibit
I thought the art and film props were exquisite!
Through Tim Burton's brain I now feel like I have crept!

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 16, 2010, 08:53:59 PM
And since Maurice brought up Mister Hyde
I'll jump on his bandwagon and ride
In Manhattan we were too late for brunch
But we ate at the JEKYLL & HYDE CLUB for Lunch
Not 4 blocks from the MOMA; what's to decide?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 23, 2010, 04:23:46 AM
      ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                  21,000 hits, to this thread, now, in sight,
                  Frivolous foolishness, the UMA'S blight,
                  LIMERICKS RULE,
                  As a Tool, for Fooles,
                  So, Ghosties and Ghoulies, please, write one, tonight!

      ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 23, 2010, 03:57:26 PM
I am not a ghostie nor a ghoulie but I am on site,
Now if you're talking about a Hyde or a seek  then sit tight,
Because my better evil half is full of sharp wit,
So just remember to avoid my tongue's remit,
And you'll be safe from my rather nasty bite. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 24, 2010, 05:44:51 PM
Maurice has a bite that's worse than his bark
That may be why I never hide in Hyde Park
The British Isles are featured
in many a movie with creatures
So beware if you're out after dark!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Wicked Lester on February 25, 2010, 07:32:35 PM
I knew a man who was a ghoul
The thought of dead flesh would make him drool
His eyes would light up,he'd shiver and shake.
And wonder whether to fry... or use Shake and Bake.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 25, 2010, 08:41:32 PM
My ghoul friends all prefer to eat
raw flesh; they think it savory meat
They say cooking kills the flavor
and it's the freshness they savor
Except when it comes to the feet
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Wicked Lester on February 25, 2010, 10:10:22 PM
Crack that bone ,break that head
Beat little brother til he's dead
Throw him in the oven and turn it to bake
Be sure to make room for, the fudge ripple cake
Poor little brother shore wuz sweet
The best little brother we ever did eat
The only sour part was a big red blister
Come the next holiday we'll have lil sister >:D

This was actually an entry in a childs magazine that we got back in 60's Catholic school.
Go figure. chain_saw ggege 8j68j68ju
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on February 27, 2010, 08:45:18 PM
I think that I have heard it all,
Lester was twisted in the school hall,
Even as a cute little nipper.
He found himself quite chipper,
Reciting this gore as I throw up against the nearest wall.


P.S Well done on the 900th post Ivan.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on February 28, 2010, 03:57:28 AM
           :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)


                             NINE HUNDRED Posts hath IVAN wrote;
                             Mostly, I suspect, whilst aboard a boat;
                             This Whipper-Snapper's MAD WIT is clipped,
                             {IVAN wrote them, on a CLIPPER-SHIP,}
                             So, I say, "HIP,HIP!", as I lock you, in our Asylum's coat!

                             NINE HUNDRED Posts hath IVAN writ,
                             Deftly, more, than doubled mine own Half-Wit;
                             He puts the "Loop", in Loupe Garou,
                             Dices up victims, for his nightly stew,
                             Similar, to his LIMERICK Hunger - He just won't quit!
 
           :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on February 28, 2010, 08:39:23 AM
I hadn't even noticed the count of the post
I just thought Maurice deserving a roast
so I called him by name
and I lent him the blame
For all of the Brittainy ghosts
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 02, 2010, 07:40:24 PM
                    ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)

                          'Tis, again, the month, o' EIRE'S Ghosts,
                          Good ST. PADDY'S DAY, and, all, it boasts,
                          Our LIMERICK Legend continues, on,
                          The UMA is filled, with LEPRECHAUNS,
                          So, to our Brother, MAURICE, I make this Toast!

                    ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::) ~~~ ::)
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 04, 2010, 04:39:23 AM
                             MY BELOVED BRIDE, BETH,
                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                      Heaven kissed Earth, when I met you,
           Because you Married me, I've found Love, that is True,
                  Your Birth, to me, is a Most Significant Day,
                  I Pray, that, You Be Blessed, in every way;
         May GOD, WHO IS HEAVEN, Breathe you JOY, EVERNOW,
                As We share our Lives, may HIS Bliss, Untold,
          Hold Us, and, Keep Us, in HIS State, of Wonderful WOW!  

                 HAPPY SIXTH BIRTHDAY, because 51 is 5+1!
In ALL LOVE,
Your 7-year old Husband,
TIMMY, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 04, 2010, 01:19:58 PM
I would like to add my birthday wishes to Beth,
Although Timmy broke the cardinal rule by her age say-th,
Now he will be in the doghouse,
sent to bed feeling like a lousy louse,
But not to worry it's not like his unwanted weekly bath.


Best wishes Beth on your special day and congratulations on finding such a loving husband. Tim I'll give you my address later for the money order, brownie points don't come cheap you know.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 05, 2010, 01:13:26 PM
Sadly I missed out on wishing Beth well
Her birthday has already passed; twice night fell
I cannot stress enough how much joy
I wish for her and her loving Tim-boy
As a couple I think they both are pretty darn swell
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 08, 2010, 08:38:47 PM
    ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

          To IVAN & MAURICE, our most gracious "THANKS",
          In our book, your Loving LIMERICKS, "First-Rate", ranks;
          So, to WEREWOLF, &, HYDE,
          With gentle pride, we confide,
          That, our LOVE shall abide, &, ne'er, deride, your poetic pranks!

    ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 10, 2010, 07:41:35 PM
                ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;)

                         COUNT DRACULA was wooing his latest Bride,
                         Kissing her neck, he pulled her, close, to his side,
                         "I'm bats, for you, girl!",
                         "You're my Priceless Pearl!",
                         "Throughout our UNDEAD World, I'll show you, off, with Pride!"

                ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~~~ ;)
                                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 11, 2010, 02:14:09 PM
The Mummy found a new woman, too
and her hand he now wanted to woo
So he wrote her a verse
That turned into a curse
because sadly, that's all that he knew
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 11, 2010, 08:29:12 PM
Brilliantly succinct, Br'er IVAN!
Another fine submission, as we near the LIMERICK Thread's 2nd Anniversary, as Inaugurated, by PACKY PAUL, on March 17, 2008, 06:30:32 AM!

           :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

                  IMHOTEP invited KHARIS, for a cup, of TANA LEAF TEA,
                  To recount, all, their trials, over what they'd hoped, to be;
                  As Ankh-es-en-amon's Lover,
                  ARDATH lost, to another,
                  Whilst KHARIS never succeeded, as Princess Anankaís "Honey"!

           :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 16, 2010, 04:10:57 PM
Even Godzilla is Irish on St Patrick's day with his wearing of the green,
All during the year he stomps poor Tokyo with many fleeing the scene,
Squash goes another victim under foot,
But do you think that the big guy gives a hoot,
No he is more worried about a monster sized pint with its frothy cream.


Happy St Patrick's day my fellow Limerick rhymers.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 17, 2010, 02:29:07 AM
             ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

             "BRAVO!" IRISH MAURICE, for your marvelous ST.PADDY'S DAY Quip;
             Combining GODZILLA, with It, shows, that, "You're Sharp, As A Whip!"
             Two years have gone, by,
             No sign, of our "running dry",
             UMA-ers, please, comply, as JERRY GARCIA said, in this "LONG, STRANGE, TRIP!"

             ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 17, 2010, 03:37:22 AM
A leprechaun bit me last year
And now I have much to fear
For I turn into an imp,
a rhyming green shrimp
every time that I drink a green beer
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 20, 2010, 04:04:01 AM
   ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                IVAN'S LIMERICK STREAK, never, QUITS,
                Impeccably MAD, he doth BLITZ;
                We're LUCKY, that IVAN is here,
                Even, with his Keg, o' Green Beer,
                Giving this THREAD Billions, of HITS!

   ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 22, 2010, 05:47:00 PM
 :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-*

                   SPRING is sprung, ST. PATRICK'S is done,
                   Howling late flurries, of snow, on my lawn,
                   One day melts, into another;
                   Better, with BETH, as my Lover,
                   Her Presence Blesses my Life; making it more FUN!

 :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-*
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on March 23, 2010, 06:49:32 PM
      ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ :-* ~~~ :'(

                     COUNT DRACULA encountered THE WOLF MAN;
                     Said, to HAIRY LARRY: "I'm your Biggest Fan!"
                     LARRY tried, to take a bite,
                     THE COUNT flew, out, of sight,
                     LIKE A BAT, OUT, OF HELL, The MEATLOAF was Grand!  :-[

      ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ :-* ~~~ :'(
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
 
  :-[  Is That a VAMPIRE, or just a FLYING NON-SEQUITOR - or, a savvy Marketing Ploy!?
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 23, 2010, 07:02:28 PM
Mob rule is an ugly thing and something I can't abide,
Why these people go along for a ride,
Haven't they heard that it's rude,
To bring their touches and intrude,
When the Frankenstein's monster is only after a spring bride.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on March 24, 2010, 05:13:45 AM
The Universal Monster Army is a bloody awful lot
And as one of its sergeants I'm a lousy drunken sot
But I'd rather be surfing to this place
than twitting the finest people of cyberspace
Just so long as we have Terry to call the shots
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on March 29, 2010, 09:42:49 PM
Renfield found the courage to break Dracula's choke,
However it cost him his life with his neck broke,
He defended Mina from his life sucking grasp,
By trying to grapple with a vampire with his last gasp,
With his life ended Renfield let go of the fiends dreaded cloak.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 01, 2010, 08:06:22 PM
 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o

                 'Tis, again,  my Friends, Ye Day, O' APRIL FOOLS,
                 Rung, in, by QUASIMODO, as The Lord, Of Misrule,
                 "Normal folks" rue this Day;
                 UMA-ers come, out, to play,
                 'Til April 30th becomes May 1st, for WALPURGIS Ghouls!

 :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~~~~~~  :o
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 01, 2010, 09:40:25 PM
When it comes to poetry surely I'm the worst
and that's why I should be crowned king of this April 1st
When I try to make jest
I'm always a pest
And I can't even write a good limerick!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 02, 2010, 07:11:23 PM
Being in the company of fellow rhymers I can emulate.
Both Ivan and the Baron I like to postulate,
As I thoroughly enjoyed the photo's from the convention,
And seeing the faces put to forum favorites  was a great intention,
So this little limerick is dedicated to the unknown primate.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Unknown Primate on April 02, 2010, 09:16:54 PM
The talent in this group won't cease
It brings me a kind of peace
I won't hesitate
That limerick was great
And I thank you so much, Maurice!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 04, 2010, 02:40:47 AM
        ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

            UNKNOWN PRIMATE, I, now, count you, amongst my oldest Fans,
            For, as a Wee Tyke, enjoying my Show, when it, originally, ran,
            When we met, at HORRORHOUND, in person,
            You offered praise, instead, of cursin',
            May our UMA Brotherhood continue, to deepen, for Honoured, I am!

        ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 04, 2010, 05:18:51 AM
Tis now the third day, and he arose from the grave
But he ain't no vampire, so try to behave
not some werewolf or zombie
in soiled Abercrombie
He's Jesus, back to ensure we get saved

HAPPY EASTER!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Unknown Primate on April 05, 2010, 11:45:22 AM
No limerick from me, this time, but just wanna say, thanks to the Baron!  That was very cool!  And to that ol' Craziest Of Ivans - that was AWESOME!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 05, 2010, 12:08:06 PM
No limerick from me, this time, but just wanna say, thanks to the Baron!  That was very cool!  And to that ol' Craziest Of Ivans - that was AWESOME!

Thank YOU, Prime Time!  Always glad to see our efforts are appreciated. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 05, 2010, 08:12:03 PM
UNKNOWN PRIMATE,
What IVAN said! DITTO!  ;)

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 09, 2010, 07:58:51 PM
    >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:(

                This Spring's weather is blustery and damp;
                Stifling, in my close quarters, quite, cramped,
                Drenched, like a Primeval Squid,
                I throw, open, my coffin lid,
                To wring, out, my soggy cape ruins this Vampire's vamp!

    >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:(
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 09, 2010, 09:03:08 PM
It is rumored that he is hundreds of years old,
but it is starting to tell with the Baron truth be told,
While he is quite free with his wit in fact,
I've noticed of late he is showing less tact,
Now it seems that I was right from wolf to vamp and now the cold.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 10, 2010, 07:10:48 AM
In many a folklore and mythology
What seperates wolf from vamp is frivolity
To most ancient to medieval peoples
they were so similar it gives me the creep-les
Distinguishing between the two breeds of monster is mostly ideology

*****
Seriously, check out this passage from Wikipedia's article on <A HREF="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vrykolakas/">Greek Vampires:</A>

Etymology

The very word vrykolakas is a cognate with a Lithuanian language word vilkolakis meaning the werewolf ('vilko-' means a wolf and 'lakis' means running). In Slavic languages it is variously occurring as , vǎrkolak, as in Bulgarian, vukodlak, as in Serbian, etc. The term is derived from вълк (v‚lk)/вук (vuk), meaning "wolf" and dlaka, meaning "fur", and originally meant "werewolf" (it still has that meaning in the modern Slavic literary languages, and a similar one in Romanian: see v‚rcolac). However, the same word (in the form vukodlak) has come to be used in the sense of "vampire" in the folklore of Western Serbia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, and Montenegro (while the term "vampir" is more common in Eastern Serbia, Republic of Macedonia and in Bulgaria). Apparently, the two concepts have become mixed.[1] Even in Bulgaria, original folklore generally describes the v‚rkolak as a sub-species of the vampire without any wolf-like features.[2] It may also be noted that the Sanskrit word for wolf is vṛ́k (commonly pronounced as vrik).

Crazily Ambiguous Ivan
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 10, 2010, 12:51:37 PM
It must be catching as Ivan too is confused,
He does not know whether to howl or be transfused,
What he can do is look up the net,
So while he is looking for a knowledge mindset,
He is left in two minds but for our Hyde club he is refused.


As president of the Two minds club, I could pass judgement for a fee.
hint hint! 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 11, 2010, 06:28:08 AM
         :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;)

                          Oh, NO! My horrible, ancient, secret is out!
                          TV HORROR revealed, I'm a two-faced lout!
                          He took, to task, IVAN,
                          For his VAMP/WEREWOLF Jivin',
                          I'd HYDE, too, but, if the FEE ain't FREE, I'll SHOUT!

         :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;)
                                       :-*  EXANIMO EVERNOW,   :-*
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 11, 2010, 07:26:57 AM
If having a split monster personality
Still leaves me out of the Hyde Club, then naturally
I'll add Frankenstein's Creature
For a mental Triple Feature
Maybe then I'll get invited, finally!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 20, 2010, 07:55:39 AM
In olden times it was all the rage to fill your purse,
So it was off to Egypt's fair land to loot,
At first there were experts before they got the boot,
They too had wounds that they could nurse,
But the tombs resident stubbed his toe and gave a loud mummy's curse.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 20, 2010, 08:52:21 AM
Maurice wrote about the Mummy's Curse
but he when he read the heiroglyphics
the effects were simply terrific
His newly composed limerick verse
had the whole rhyming scheme in reverse

That was harder that I thought it would be
There must be something perverse
about writing limericks in reverse
But on Bizarro-World it would be
A matter of fact; just too easy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 20, 2010, 06:26:14 PM
Me not mad Ivan, me too smart for own good. On Bizzarro World me called Joyce James.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 20, 2010, 06:44:39 PM
Now there's a word you don't hear often,
Ivan using ancient texts for my heart to soften,
Nay my lad you need to go into the high specifics,
Before I learn to use those hieroglyphics,
For even one as dumb as me knows don't rattle a mummy's coffin.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 21, 2010, 12:08:16 AM
Too true my friend, you're more cautious than that
You don't disturb mummies or vampire bats
But you did swallow a trickle
of that drink from Dr Jekyll
So you could probably stomp Kharis flat
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 22, 2010, 06:12:09 PM
          ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)

                       TV HORROR possesses wit, brains and brawn,
                       If Trouble comes, you'll, wisely, find him, gone;
                       No, never, not, out, of fear,
                       Just, to the Pub, to buy more beer,
                       To "liquor up" the onslaught, of ZOMBIE LEPRECHAWNS!

          ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)
                                       :-*  EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 24, 2010, 09:28:18 PM
Now I am as proud as a farmyard rooster,
Strutting my stuff from the baron's Limerick booster,
So while my head swims round and fills,
I can be found on the floor right under the bar's tills,
For I am an Irishman not a poor man's Bertie Wooster.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 25, 2010, 06:42:44 PM
        ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)

                      This UMA ARMY is Awesomely Great;
                      For, here, one can find so many Mates!
                      These Limericks are global,
                      And, not, unlike, a snowball,
                      Whose chances, in hell, are, best, left, to Fate! :-[

        ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)
                                 :-*   EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 25, 2010, 06:58:55 PM
Silence is golden and such a treat,
Yet writing these limericks is such a feat,
Onwards and upwards,
We are never short of words,
For it is my pleasure to meet and greet.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 26, 2010, 11:58:37 AM
I just watched two Paul Naschy movies
made in the 70s, their soundtracks were groovy
I saw him play werewolf, slasher, and the Devil
appearing with zombies, vampires, all quite evil
His filmography's comnparable to Chaney's... but with more boobies!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 26, 2010, 01:20:34 PM
Chaney may not have had the odd boob,
But his films made up for that on the TV tube,
Long gone are his phantom and hunchback,
Even during the afternoon as I munch from my lunchpack,
I took the time to enjoy his legacy via my living room cube.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Unknown Primate on April 26, 2010, 01:58:20 PM
        ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)

                      This UMA ARMY is Awesomely Great;
                      For, here, one can find so many Mates!
                      These Limericks are global,
                      And, not, unlike, a snowball,
                      Whose chances, in hell, are, best, left, to Fate! :-[

        ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;)
                                 :-*   EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

That was extra cool, Baron!  These are ALL so cool, I think they should all be in a special UMA Limerick Compilation book!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on April 26, 2010, 05:13:19 PM
I get so excited listening to our own hairy gorilla,
Thats why we are like boats in a flotilla,
We depend on each other,
For thats why we even bother,
And gather together under the UMA umbrella.


P.S
I'm all for the limerick's being published and the proceeds going into the UMA fund, great idea Unknown Primate. Although you might have some trouble from you know who? (Tim) I've heard that he can be a bit tight. In fact I don't know if this is true or not but I even heard it said that he even charges the moths for living in his wallet! 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 27, 2010, 07:27:08 PM
tv horror writ:
P.S. ~ I'm all for the limerick's being published and the proceeds going into the UMA fund!
Great idea, Unknown Primate.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear UP,
... Capital Idea, for raising additional TOY TOUR CAPITAL!
   If we sold copies, of our Limerick book, in Washington, it would be a CAPITOL IDEA!
   TV HORROR is a Genius...
`````````````````````````````````````

Although you might have some trouble from you know who? (Tim) I've heard that he can be a bit tight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   I'm TIGHT, only, when I drink... I mix OIL, into my Alcohol, so, that, I don't SQUEAK!
`````````````````````````````````````

In fact I don't know if this is true or not but I even heard it said that he even charges the moths for living in his wallet! 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   Oh, ENTIRELY TRUE! And, they are, only, too happy, to pay!
   Otherwise, they end up as MOTH SOUFFLE!
````````````````````````````````````````
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on April 27, 2010, 07:40:15 PM
        8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)

             I agree, with UP & TV: we should compile a book,
             Of our Limerick Madness, so, that, others may look,
             To see, that, the UMA,
             Is no work, &, all play;
             Creating, more, MONSTER KIDS, who'll "Give Us THE HOOK"!

        8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
        8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on April 28, 2010, 12:02:31 PM
Didn't we discuss this idea once before?
Picking the best poems; not too easy a chore
While the books probably wouldn't sell;
I'd try it anyway, what the hell.
But since all our efforts are this bad, we may need some more
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2010, 03:57:31 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

                  Amongst my most favourite, of modern inventions,
                  Is the concept, known, as HORROR CONVENTIONS,
                  Delighted, to attend them, since AD 2002,
                  By now, I've racked up, more, than a few;
                  Money, or, free time, might fail me, but, not, my intentions!

 ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 01, 2010, 07:33:25 PM
            :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~ :o

               It escaped my notice: WALPURGIS-NACHT!
               BORGO PASS, at sunset, we set our clocks;
               From April 30th, unto May 1st;
               When evil spirits do their worst -
               DRACULA'S DEMETER reaches England's docks.

            :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~ :o
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 01, 2010, 08:31:28 PM
I had the good fortune tonight,
Of witnessing a most wonderful sight,
It was late evening that I beset,
A mountain range's  Sunset,
What a fitting end to Walpurgis night.
     
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 01, 2010, 10:49:31 PM
I rather enjoyed this night of Walpurgis
For this year it marked the end of my service
No longer the villain
I'm now a civilian
Seems I made the military too nervous
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 03, 2010, 04:13:28 PM
    :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'(

                    A RASH LIMERICK, ABOUT...  A SHRUBBERY!
                   ------------------------------------------------
                   Ambushed, by a PLANT, in my own Backyard;
                   I'm BRANDED, with its POISONOUS "Calling-Card"!
                   No, not, BIT, by a nasty, Alien, TRIFFID,
                   Nor, even, *gasp* KATHY GIFFORD;
                   This CREEP, by Creeping IVY, was BIT, HARD!

    :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :o ~~~ >:( ~~~ :'(
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 03, 2010, 04:25:14 PM
     ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D

                      BR'ER IVAN: FROEHLICHE WALPURGIS-NACHT!
                      As, Over-Board, &, Ashore, E'ermore, Thou'lt WALK,
                      'Tis ADMIRABLE, to behold Thou, WILLIN',
                      To eschew Thy Career, o' Nautical SWILLIN',
                      &, Take, to LAND {1/3 less Fillin'}; We're glad you've DOCKED!

     ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D
                             Now, Thou art a LUBBER, not, a FIGHTER!
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 03, 2010, 05:47:22 PM
He decided to do something quite rash,
He flew into the garden in a flash,
Now he is suffering from a irritating itch,
Which I know never came from Hazel the witch,
So all's well and good so long as he keeps doing the monster mash.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 03, 2010, 08:00:32 PM
 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

              When DRACULA decides, to play a Fiendish Joke, >:D
              He embeds Poison Ivy oil, into his Great Cloak,  ;)
              Then, turning, into a mist,  ::)
              He wafts, by local Allergists,  :o
              Leaving them, scratching, as, into Hives, they've broke!  :'( 

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 04, 2010, 01:20:03 PM
                       BREAKING 23,000 Readership! Hip-Hip-HooCoffinRay!!!

             :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :-*

                       Having been read 22985 times, now, these 65 pages,
                       Have seen our UMA Troops, through so many stages,
                       LIMERICKS, literally, litter our year,
                       Leaking, out, of orifices: i.e., our ears,
                       Quelling our tears & fears, with cheers, sneers, jeers... & rages!

             :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :) have a nice day :-*
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 05, 2010, 02:48:51 AM
 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)

             23,000 and 10; we've done it, again!
             Onward and upwards, my UMA FRIENDS;
             These can't, all, be gems,
             Like FRANKIE, or, THEM!
             Our LIMERICK Thread seems, to be, without end!

 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 05, 2010, 11:31:39 AM
The Baron is right our limerick's hit the right tone,
I have often heard it mentioned without one groan,
However it has been compared to a trainwreck,
Try to look away but some are still pulled back,
So here's to a 23,000 more  although some members will moan. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 06, 2010, 06:59:40 PM
 :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D

                     This SUMMER'S Heat is a-comin' on;
                     Lounge, around, on CHANEY'S LON,
                     This Season's heat is COOL,
                     THE CREATURE ain't no Fool,
                     Diving, into THE BLACK LAGOON'S Pool, He's gone!

 :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 08, 2010, 12:15:50 PM
With Summer comes this year's Wonderfest
This Louisville show put the UMA to the test
When they set up next week's exhibit
I hope my schedule doesn't prohibit
me from popping up and wishing my best

(and lending a hand, like the rest)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 09, 2010, 03:09:16 PM
              :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)

                     HORRORHOUND was, such, a BLAST,  ;D
                     Now, WONDERFEST is a-comin', FAST!  ;)
                     Summer CONVENTIONS, underway;  :)
                     Looking, forward, night and day,   8)
                     They're "Future", now, yet, too, soon, "PAST"!  :'(

              :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 10, 2010, 11:39:14 PM
Hoping to send poor Stephen Orlac to his doom,
Lorre played doctor Gogol as a would be groom,
For even a wax statue failed to impress,
So he as the recently executed Rollo did dress,
He failed proving that the pen is mightier than the sword we assume.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 16, 2010, 03:19:13 AM
           :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o

                Wouldst, that, We'd been able, to Pilgrimage, to WONDERFEST,
                My Bride, BETH, and, I, should have counted, ourselves, Twice-Blest!
                Instead, a local Murder Mystery,
                Had us switch our usual History,
                Alas, We missed CREEPY JEFF & GENERAL TERRY, As Breakfast Guests!

           :o ~~~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~~~ :o
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 18, 2010, 07:58:01 PM
 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)

                    "Unconditionally replete, with Hideous Idiocy,
                     Malevolently rife, with Fiduciary Perfidies,"
                     COUNT DRACULA commented, to the Assembly,
                     O' MONSTERS, who required some assembly,
                     Makes this LIMERICK an Excruciating Oddity!

 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::)
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.






Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 22, 2010, 04:51:49 PM
               :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :)

                       WALPURGIS-NACHT is, once, again, over - BUMMER!
                       Now, we speed, onward, to the First Day, o' SUMMER;
                       I treasure the Summers, of Yore,
                       When I learned MONSTER-KID Lore,
                       Like THOREAU, I know, that, I March, To A Different Drummer.

               :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :) ~~~~~ :)
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 23, 2010, 03:57:10 PM
How can I have missed this thread?
Its the best thing since sliced bread!
Why moan about re-makes and sequels?
Write a daft poem instead.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 23, 2010, 11:48:12 PM
How can I have missed this thread?
Its the best thing since sliced bread!
Why moan about re-makes and sequels?
Write a daft poem instead.

         :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :P

                 At the Above  Offering- "NEW BLOOD!" Yelled DRAC;
                 Beside himself, with Sanguine Frenzy, at this fact;
                 "This new guy's a Brute,
                 But, Bloody Cute,
                 I'll pick up his scent... and, Hey! He leaves BIG TRACKS!"

         :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :P
                              A Formal Velcome, to LONG LIVE KONG!  ;D
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 24, 2010, 11:58:20 AM
Obie was a man who made a king, and a simian king was he
The king met a maiden and they hit it off, but it didn't end happily.
Someone said, as the king lay dead, "it was beauty killed the beast"
It wasn't the bullets, nor the planes or the fall, that gave poor Kong eternal peace.

~~~~~~~~~~~

You dont have to be a master of words,
Nor a descendant of Robert Burns,
To string some words, and make them rhyme,
Or some that dont from time to time.
It matters not if your young or old,
Man or woman, frog or toad.
Open your mind and reach inside,
The words are there for you to find!
 



 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on May 24, 2010, 06:25:56 PM
Quasimodo was so impressed you deserve a ding dong,
For it's not often we get fresh blood or I could be wrong,
It takes neither rhyme nor reason for a posting,
As the only thing you should care about is the odd roasting,
So welcome aboard and all together we proclaim long live Kong.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 25, 2010, 01:13:43 AM
To TV horror and Baron Timotheus,
Your hospitality has left me touched.
It's early morning and I'm late for work,
So my Poetry isn't up to much.
It's nice to feel that I belong
Unlike old Frankie, Wolfie and Kong.
So without further hesitation;
I humbly accept your invitation.
For letting me join your monstrous ranks,
I offer my sincerest thanks!                              thrhrt
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 25, 2010, 07:40:17 PM
        :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-*

               Not, only, is our New KONG a LONG LIVER;
               Possessing a GREAT HEART, He's a GIVER,
               Taking time, out, of his DAY,
               To create, with words, &, PLAY,
               Intuits our LIMERICK Truth: "Up the Paddle, without a RIVER!" *

              * Wot?! You mean this Dried-Up STREAM O' CONSCIOUSNESS?  ;)
                                     Are YOU CRAZY???!!! ::)

        :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :-*
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 26, 2010, 02:10:26 PM
My girlfriend is a lovely lass,
And pretty, I don't mind boasting.
But I've made a promise to take her out,
So I shouldn't really be posting.

But alas my friends I could not resist, 
So while she's in the bath,
I thought I'd sneak a crafty peek,
And risk her womanly wrath.
For it may lack the warmth of a human hand,
Where you cant meet face to face, 
But if your a fan of Ghost's and Ghoul's,
There is no better place!! ..............................................Long Live The UMA!!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 27, 2010, 07:55:33 AM
Your gal was bathing in the tub
And you chose to sneak a peek here, at the club?
I'm not endorsing porn
but beware a woman scorned
You may need to prioritize, bub!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 27, 2010, 03:32:29 PM
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
My beloved girl was in the bath,
But alas, was not alone.
Our baby daughter was with her too,
Enjoying the ducks and foam.
And though a child will bring you joy,
And happiness you cannot buy,
They tend to take up all your time,
And can even cause a sigh.
Of course Crazy1van, you are quite right,
And your words have taken root,
For too much time in the UMA,
And she may give me the boot.   :-\ :-\ :-\
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on May 28, 2010, 12:52:13 PM
I understand your quandry, I've two kids of my own
Of course it's different for me now; they both are fully grown
But yes they took up lots of time
back then I rarely stopped to rhyme
Now I watch monsters whenever I wish; they've moved out of my home!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 29, 2010, 02:25:38 AM
;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

             The Wit & Wisdom offered, here, I value, as being Real,  :-*
             My FANG-MILY'S Loving insights, of how they think & Feel;  :)
             Revealing their depth & scope, I'm glad,  ;D
             To enjoy My CLASSIC MONSTERS Comrades,  ;)
             & The Humour, that, as ICONS - We're a Bunch, of BIG, HAIRY, DEALS!  :D

;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 29, 2010, 07:23:30 AM
Well its Saturday and its began to rain,
And the weatherman says it will remain.
I wanted to have a barbecue,
But soggy sausage just will not do.
So what to do this afternoon?
A game of poker or a round of pool?
Well we didn't have to think for long,  
A monster movie marathon!
 8j68j68ju je7u6ker6 thrhrt u6juu  
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on May 30, 2010, 03:47:12 PM
   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

            I, now, present a LIMERICK, which might inspire a "GONG!"
            For I've wrapped it, in the Title, of a Popular '80's SONG;
            Woven, into it, an Honourable Reference,
            Of a Sr. Actor, who's my Preference...
            Imagine JOE COCKER, Singing: "LOVE LIFT US, UP, WHERE WE BE LON"!

   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on May 30, 2010, 04:56:52 PM


If the monsters where around today, and had a favourite sport,
I imagine Frankenstein shooting hoops, and tearing up the court.
In the boxing ring the Wolfman howls, and swings a padded claw,
The Mummy doesn't stand a chance, and the crowd lets out a roar.
Dracula is more refined, and is different from the rest,
He isn't fond of exorcise, but loves a game of chess!
     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 












Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 01, 2010, 07:44:15 PM
 ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;)

           COUNT DRACULA is a Poet, and, Poets love, to Rhyme;
           My fav quote, by DRAC: "So many necks; so little time!"
           Of course, his erudition,
           Set his path, to Perdition,
           Yet, that "Needful Art", of his, by others, would be called a crime!

 ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;)
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 03, 2010, 02:40:52 PM
If a Zombie outbreak came to be,
and the world was overrun,
I've often thought, in a twisted way,
that it might be lots of fun.
Where the law of the land is to survive,
With bat and gun and wit,
Where your best chance is to stay alert,
and keep your body fit.
Of course at times, it would be horrific,
And difficult to take,
to have a loved one die in your arms,
then suddenly awake.
But give me a world of undead hoards,
and redneck gang attacks,
than a life of work and shopping malls,
government and tax!!
 Zombie Grin Zombie Blush Zombie Confused Zombie LOL Zombie Nuetral Zombie No Smile Zombie Roll Eyes
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on June 03, 2010, 07:57:30 PM
Dracula's daughter was certainly no old bat,
For as soon as I witnessed her my heart she got,
Here was a natural beauty,
Who to woo was my sworn duty,
Never mind her fangs I wanted us to chew the fat.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 05, 2010, 05:27:35 AM
 ;D   BRILLIANT LIMERICK, MAURICE, OLDE FRIEND!

 ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)

         Our Resident IRISHMAN, TV HORROR, t'wouldst seem,
         Is a CLASSIC MONSTER-Man o' Very Bold Dreams;
         A Brave Heart, he's, unafraid, to dally,
         With VAMPIRE Ladies - Right up his Alley!
         Such an image left me, laughing, 'til I burst, at the seams!

 ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 05, 2010, 08:04:45 AM
I have spent the last hour reading this thread,
I laughed so hard I almost lost my head,
Nothing feels better when logging on,
Than seeing in 'posts unread'..
Warning: Irish Limericks ahead!
 
God bless you limericking fools!!!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 05, 2010, 10:02:00 PM
I have spent the last hour reading this thread,
I laughed so hard I almost lost my head,
Nothing feels better when logging on,
Than seeing in 'posts unread'..
Warning: Irish Limericks ahead!
 
God bless you limericking fools!!!

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                   True, to form, our Limerick Forum RULES,
                   24,000+ Readers, Goblins and Ghouls;
                   LONG LIVE KONG sums, up, Best,
                   What we'd hope, from the Rest,
                   That, our word-Play, creates a most tasty GRUEL!

 ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on June 05, 2010, 10:17:23 PM
Tis was beauty that killed the beast, so answer me this? Why is the Baron still posting Limericks! 2400+ there must be an awful lot of sick people about and I must confess that I am one of them, correction make that two seeing that I am in two minds.


Speaking of most comely wenches,
There is many to be found in the trenches,
Covered in mud or for matter blood,
You could always tell a bath from a flood,
But nothing beats those buttock clenches.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 06, 2010, 04:06:39 PM
:o TV HORROR Writ: "But nothing beats those buttock clenches."  ;)
Sounds, like, the answer, to a ZEN KOAN: " What's the sound, of one hand, clapping?"...

 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8)

         The VAMPIRE'S curse: unable, to enter, uninvited,  >:(
         He knocked, but, was turned, away; felt slighted;  :'(
         So, he tried his olde romantic charms,  >:D
         They brought him, no good, only, harm,  :o
         He escaped, withered, blighted; with Hopes, unrequited!  :-[

 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.







Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 06:03:12 PM
        :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D

                   THE MUMMY was maudlin, over losing his Love,
                   So many centuries, elapsed, with him, out, of the groove;
                   Still, no dummy, he,
                   To set her Mummy, free,
                   He'd kill her current incarnation, but, she didn't approve!

        :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ :D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:11:09 PM
        :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o

                                  Number  996
                                 ~~~~~~~~~
               Keeping, alive{?}, this LIMERICK Thread,
               Requires new material, about THE UNDEAD,
               Fresh BLOOD must be added,
               To quaff, what we've padded,
               With motifs, of re-cycled puns, previously, read!

        :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:14:39 PM
    ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

                                               Number  997
                                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~
                  COUNT DRACULA thought, that, our Limericks sucked;
                  "They're, no, kin, to me, their teeth are, too, bucked!"
                  Still, with appetite, hearty,
                  He read them, like, a party;
                  Declaring, as he finished: " That Von WOLFSTEIN is a schmuck!"

    ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:18:45 PM
 :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'(

                                  Number 998
                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
           The ELECTRODES breathed, into THE MONSTER, Life;
           Yet, in doing, so, bequeathed him, only, strife,
           His Face, and, his Form,
           So, reviled, and, forlorn,
           Turned, out, to be the reason, that, He "blew, up" his "Wife".

 :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'(

           --- Sounds, like, one, of those inflatable jobs.
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:22:35 PM
     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                                     Number 999
                                 ~~~~~~~~~~~
              Our Serendipitous Reign, as True MONSTER KIDS,
              Embraces a UNIVERSAL Network, of Various IDS,
              With, so much, Love, and, Talent,
              As well as Courage, quite, valiant,
              Keeps us Loving THE CLASSICS, as, much, as we, ever, did!

     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:28:32 PM
 ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

                             NUMBER 1000
                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
            LIMERICK 1000! As a Punster, I just couldn't resist;
            For my copping this Title, please, don't be pissed,
            Who'd have believed it, as "Inevitable",
            As PACKY PAUL grew our first "rotten vegetable",
            That, 999 Limericks, later, The MUSE, our Brains, still, kissed!

 ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 08, 2010, 07:44:07 PM
     :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[

                                          Number 1001
                                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~
                  LON CHANEY, SR., "THE MAN, OF A THOUSAND FACES"
                  Left, to Posterity,a Career, of Remarkable Graces;
                  Our LIMERICKS' Deformity,
                  Shows, off, our Enormity,
                  Of 1000 Bold Faces, of Remarks and Disgraces!

     :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :-[
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 09, 2010, 12:07:25 PM
Something awoke count Drac with a start,
It wasn't the sun,
Or a stake through the heart,
He'd dreampt of a man lurking in the mist,
Dr. Extactor, the great dentist!'
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 cl:)
 thrhrt
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 11, 2010, 07:32:25 PM
                LONG LIVE KONG writ: "Dr. Extactor, the great dentist!'"
                                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~
             :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X

                         The Arcane Tooth-Puller, above, mentioned,
                         Believed, that, with an ounce, of prevention,
                         He'd save any denture,
                         From untimely censure,
                         So, "YANK", 'E go, HOME, from MONSTER CONVENTIONS!

             :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-X
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on June 11, 2010, 08:43:27 PM
Timotheus is the man in the vault,
Why oh why is recycling our fault,
Do we not furnage the odd amusing limerick,
That distracts us from the dentists needle prick,
Teeth aside it's the old wounds that need the salt.


The Baron is in the thongs of boredom this day,
Going over the old and the dusty come what may,
Limerick's are built to last that is true,
However on this thread it is safe from the contents so blue,
So we make do with the humour instead and mix it into the fray.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 12, 2010, 11:43:40 AM
Don't assume that we've never used blue humor
These limericks grown on me; no, that's not a tumor
monster movies oft have sexual themes
the motives for many vexual schemes
Seems most mosnters just want love to be true, not a rumor.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 13, 2010, 05:37:53 PM
        :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D

                     SUPERMAN has an allergic reaction, to KRYPTONITE,
                     Exposed, to it, he'll become weak & lose the FIGHT;
                     On a Mission, to BATMAN'S CAVE,
                     He erred; entered my lavish GRAVE,
                     Ended up, as SUPPER-MAN, in my CRYPT, TONIGHT!

        :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 13, 2010, 06:52:21 PM
The Baron ate Superman?  Is that really the truth?
Check his bicuspids; has he broken a tooth?
A werewolf eating kryptonian meat
must beware, for you are what you eat
Now Tim must avoid changing everytime he uses a phone booth!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 14, 2010, 02:39:45 PM


There are those who suffer a most curious affliction,
When telling lies has become an addiction.
But as long as it's harmless and won't cause a tiff,
An elaborate lie can become a great myth.
Although 'the truth' they say, can be stranger than fiction.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 15, 2010, 10:35:04 AM
Oh Konged One, doubt you our tale is legit?
That the Baron could have roasted Kal El on a spit?
Since Supes has no defense against magic
a fight with Timotheus for him would be tragic
But wait, I just saw the Man of Steel fly by; guess I better quit!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 15, 2010, 08:45:23 PM
 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

                In my fervent Quest, at best, to be JOCULAR,
                I devised, in my mind, a JEST, SPECTACULAR;
                SUPPER-MAN, I did, NOT, really, EAT;
                To allay your grief;  NOT, I must REPEAT!
                That we don't see "Eye-To-Eye", I find, quite, OCULAR!

 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 17, 2010, 04:44:56 PM
 ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

                   MONSTER LIMERICKS rely, on one's ability, to be TERSE;
                   They dissolve, and, decay, from bad, to WORSE,
                   Caging PUNS, in RHYMES,
                   Is, akin, to jailing GREEN SLIME,
                   Can't stop these BLOBS, with Money, unless you pay PER VERSE!

 ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 17, 2010, 05:19:48 PM



Dearest Baron, this rhyme lacks innovation,
I am tired, and low on inspiration,
But before I give up the ghost,
I thought I'd write a post,
To honour your delegation.

~~~~~~~~~~

Goodnight and fare thee well for now!  ;)

ZZzzzzzzz
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 18, 2010, 05:56:56 PM
     ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

                    Dearest KONG, your Rhyme's Fluid Concentration,
                    Shows, that, you're devoid, o' Mental Constipation,
                    Too, you've no lack, of Innovation;
                    Fired, up, am I, by your Inspiration,
                    Therefore, I Boast, your post, with a Toast, of Adulation!

                                             ~~~~~~~~~~
                       Good Morrow, and, fare Thee, well, EVERNOW!   ;)
                                   Mua-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Et-Cetera!

     ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 18, 2010, 10:22:45 PM
This thread still exists, over one thousand posts strong?
I thought limericks appealed to a niche crowd; what went wrong?
Our think tank must be dry by now
yet the poems keep flowing somehow
I blame Tim and Maurice and Long Live Kong!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 19, 2010, 03:55:41 PM
                Posted, by CRAZY 1VAN: "I thought limericks appealed to a niche crowd"

         ;D ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~  :-*

                Ah, YES! The Puzzling Element: If LIMERICKS STINK;
                When Each New One appears, I DARE YOU, TO BLINK;
                We Need a NEEDLE, to SEW, with This THREAD;
                &, when, All, is Done, THERE'S, MORE, DONE, THAN SAID!
                I'd Say: We've got, more, SONS, OF A NICHE, than you THINK!

         ;D ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~  :-*
                                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 20, 2010, 08:08:23 PM
               Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin

                     There, once, was an UNDEAD, called a ZOMBIE,
                     I saw, one, as a Child, and, screamed: "MOMMIE!"
                     In the years, since I've grown,
                     Whene'er, I've heard their groans,
                     I've, simply, blown them, apart, with a BOMBIE!

               Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin ~~~ Zombie Grin
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 21, 2010, 07:09:25 PM
 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

                   There, once, was a VAMPIRE, named DRACULA;
                   Who liked, to bite folks, on their UVULA,
                   He bit a HAWAIIAN BOY,
                   But, choked, on his POI,
                   Now, DRAC wears a Grass Skirt, &, dances THE HULA!

 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 22, 2010, 10:10:22 AM
There once was a werewolf named Larry
Whose predicament had gotten quite scary
His new movie was panned
by the teen Twilight fans
So take heed monster remakes, and be-wary!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 23, 2010, 01:59:53 AM
    :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'(

                 Her Hissing Denial would drive FRANK, to TEARS;
                 Rather, than go, to drown his sorrow, in BEERS,
                 He pulled, down, the LEVER,
                 See Her, again?! NEVER!
                 From DR. PRETORIUS, that, did, not, elicit CHEERS!

    :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :'(
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 25, 2010, 12:52:44 AM
      ??? ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :'(

                     How well, I  remember, KHARIS, THE MUMMY;
                     Good head, on his shoulders; He was no Dummy;
                     'Til he lost it, in a Love, unfortunate,
                     It consumed him, in trials, importunate,
                     Haven't seen him, in years, for our weekly GIN RUMMY.

      ??? ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :-[ ~~~~~ :'(
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 25, 2010, 07:53:17 PM
     ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D

                 Stalking, out, of the Ancient, Primordial SOUP,
                 Evolved a FISH-MAN, who became the DUPE,
                 For a Beauty, in a SWIM-SUIT;
                 Losing, at Love, He became a RECRUIT,
                 In THE UMA'S Collection, of  *a-hem* UNIQUE TROOPS!

     ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: fmofmpls on June 25, 2010, 09:36:10 PM
This is the thread that never dies,
Limericks abound for lonely eyes,
Persistent poets toiling their pens,
With Baron and Ivan dueling here often,
I'm outta my league, but I don't care,
What good am I if I don't share?

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on June 26, 2010, 08:24:56 AM
As good as any General can be
and good for his troops in this monsters' army
You founded our feast
and let loose the beast
Now we 'honor' you with awful poetry!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on June 26, 2010, 02:02:06 PM

Mr. Grady had a wife and two kids,
But was prone to occasional fits,
One day he cracked,
And taking an axe,
He chopped up his family to bits.

 u6juu

~~~~~~~~~~~

On a rocky hill the building stands,
Made of timber, mortar and stone.
The perfect place to get away,
'A holiday home from home'.
But behind the cheery, grand veneer,
Lurks a sinister, murky past,
And a night spent at the Overlook,
May end up being your last.

~~~~~~~~~~~



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 26, 2010, 07:31:21 PM
                            fmofmpls writ:
                This is the thread that never dies,
                Limericks abound for lonely eyes,
                Persistent poets toiling their pens,
                With Baron and Ivan dueling here often,
                I'm outta my league, but I don't care,
                What good am I if I don't share?
               ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::)

               We're Blessed, with our GENERAL, TERRY,
               We're Honoured, that, here, he doth TARRY,
               When he pens us a Limerick line,
               He reminds us, of FRANKENSTEIN,
               The sight, of his Poem, alone, tends, to be *SCARY!

 :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::)

* And, I mean, that, as a compliment, in the Kindest UNIVERSAL CLASSIC MONSTER Way Possible!!!

                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,  :-*
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 28, 2010, 12:33:53 AM
 ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::)

               Well, of, all, of the MONSTERS, I know,
               Our King, BORIS, sure put, on a show,
               I, also, admit, I love BELA,
               {A most remarkable Fella!};
               Fond, o' LON, too, when he let his hair grow!

 ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ::)

                               EXANIMO EVERNOW, ;D
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 28, 2010, 06:29:12 PM
          thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

                 Attaining His Fame, He was a Dark and Stormy Knight;
                 The mere mention, of His Name, fills my Soul, with Fright;
                 Who is this cad?! Why, 'tis PRINCE VLAD!
                 I must say, I'm relieved, and, even, glad,
                 That VAN HELSING reduced him, to dust, so, He doesn't Bite!

          thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,  ;)
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on June 29, 2010, 06:00:38 PM
           >:( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ >:(

               Ancient Egypt's Tombs, tragically, come, to mind,
               Occult Lore, of deadly dealings, and, precious finds,
               Dark Magic spans several Millennium,
               Restores a semblance, of Life, to One,
               THE MUMMY returns, accursed, for, in Unholy Love, He pines.

           >:( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ >:(
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on June 29, 2010, 06:14:29 PM
What a wonder it is to discover this thread anew,
I have been somewhat busy and on a tight curfew,
Just as the World stood still,
My fingers got cramp from yet another household bill,
And I've found the time to converse with my most loyal motley crew.


I salute you for keeping this thread alive,
Ivan, Tim and Kong plus someone called Terry?
Never heard of him personally, he must be like Renfield another fly by night character.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 01, 2010, 07:36:36 PM
          :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :-*

                      We've conscripted a Chap, called TV HORROR,
                      And, this Thread woudst be, much, POORER,
                      Without him, &, his IRISH WIT,
                      Why, the rest, o' us, might QUIT,
                      Producing LIMERICK SLEEPERS! {O.K., mayhap, SNORERS!} ;)

          :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :-*
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 02, 2010, 01:56:58 PM
The werewolf fled the moors and the mud began to cake,
He ran for his life hunted for his own sake,
Over the hills they were coming closer he could not fail,
Faster and faster he ran although quite frail,
Until that fatal shot which ended with a sparkling Irish wake.


Thank you baron for the kind words, it it my honour to serve.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 02, 2010, 07:21:35 PM
            ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                     This WEREWOLF fled the moors, with less;
                     Ran, for my Life, in a state of "Undress"
                     Over hills, moors, fen and swamp,
                     I, nearly, caught cold; awfully damp,
                     I ran, 'tho', quite, frail; my Obit appeared, in THE DAILY MAIL!

                    { Only a dream, what a relief, to be free, of gall;
                       A Victim, of a sparkling Irish Wake-Up Call. }

            ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

                 Thank you baron for the kind words, it it my honour to serve.
                          ~ Brother MAURICE; the Pleasure, is OURS!

                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 03, 2010, 10:19:23 AM
The Moores fled the werewolf in fear
It was muddy and smelled of Irish beer
From Paris it's course had been altered
till it passed through the straits of Gibralter
Now he's AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN TANGIER
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 03, 2010, 10:18:12 PM
:-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~  GOD BLESS THE USA & THE UMA  :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-*

              I'm an AMERICAN WEREWOLF, on THE FOURTH, OF JULY;
              Like, FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND & MOM'S APPLE PIE,
              I Salute my GRAND-UNCLE SAM,
              Whilst eating CANNED SPAM,
              For a REAL TREAT, I'll EAT WHALE-MEAT, &, BLUBBER, not, CRY!

:-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~  GOD BLESS THE USA & THE UMA  :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-*

                                          And, THANK You, IVAN
  {&, other UMA SERVICE-MEN & WOMEN, for Your Valiant Contribution, to our Welfare!}

                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 04, 2010, 05:44:49 AM
       ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~~ Zombie LOL

             This Forbidden Topic, which, all, approach, with DREAD:
             Succinctly, put: "WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead"!
             This Mad List, of CRIMES,
             Now, (Read 25050 times),
             Requires the Stomach, of a ZOMBIE,&, The Heart, of an UNDEAD!

       ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~~ Zombie LOL
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 04, 2010, 05:51:51 AM
Frosty and Rudolph had high expectations
when they headed south for a family vacation
But they needed to get back up north
before the final firework fired on the Fourth
Even magickal snowmen in July come with an expiration
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 04, 2010, 12:34:01 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)

           Through the 4th, of July, Our Friend, FROSTY, didst MUDDLE,  :)
           Until, all, that remained, was his fast-evaporating PUDDLE,  :'(
           "No Sweat!" Saith HE;  ;D
           And, "Look, Ma!"... no BVD! :o
           At THE NORTH POLE, his Bride died, of FROST-BITE, with no-one, to CUDDLE! :-*

 ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ ::)
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 05, 2010, 07:54:47 PM
        :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'(

              THE WEREWOLF OF LONDON, they shot;
              Unsure, if it was DR. GLENDON, or, not,
              The Inspector aimed, true;
              What, else, could he do?
              The Good Doctor, now, rests, in His Family's Plot.

        :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'( ~~~ :'(
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on July 05, 2010, 08:18:22 PM
Poor Wilford the Werewolf was scary
but he was forgotten when viewers saw Larry
Even though he came first
Universal treated him worst
Probably 'cuz he wasn't as hairy
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 06, 2010, 04:28:34 AM
;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D

               WILFRED, The WEREWOLF, I remember, as being, mildly, SCARY,
               Nothing, compared, to our Incomparable LYCANTHROPE, LARRY,
               Our WILL was, howe'er, of a POP Musical Bent,
               More, Singing, than Howling, where'er, he went,
               Reminded me, of an early version, o' The BROTHER GIBB, named, BARRY!

;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~~~ ;D
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 06, 2010, 01:28:24 PM

Two zany Yankees went trotting the globe,
with little respect for the backpackers code.
The locals weren't nice,
but gave sound advice;
"Beware the moon, and stick to the road!!"


~~~~~~~~~~~


In murky waters true romance was made,
Gill-Man's love for the dame wouldn't fade.
This new girl was nice,
but she wouldn't suffice,
He missed his first love, the Fiji Mermaid!!



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 06, 2010, 04:52:11 PM
        ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

                    There, once, was a UMA TROOPER,
                    Who wasn't a PARTY POOPER;
                    Like, LAMOUR, in SARONG,
                    I say: "LONG LIVE KONG!",
                    For providing 2 LIMERICKS, so SUPER!

        ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 06, 2010, 10:53:46 PM
Glendon the werewolf is the one that I would pitch,
He seemed to play the creature without a hitch,
With being animalistic in his thespian approach,
From his gut came a growl that none could poach,
So it's a head's up which werewolf I would ditch.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 07, 2010, 01:54:27 PM
      8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)

              It bodes, this Seventh Month, on its Seventh Day,
              That, Summer's scorching heat, is, in full sway;
              Stand, still, and, swelter,
              Sweating, Helter-Skelter,
              Or, Join, in Cool-Crypt Shelter, The MONSTERS, of THE UMA!

      8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ 8)
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 08, 2010, 07:07:43 PM
      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

          These IRISH LIMERICKS are written, by A{Shriveled, Shrunken}Head!
          MAX'S nearest Cousin; the reason, why, 'tis 25,296 times, read;
          He, like, LON CHANEY, SR., is a Master, of Disguise,
          TIM, IVAN, TV HORROR, KONG, are, just, some, of his Lies,
          He rests, by day; by night, he bays, to fill your hearts, with DREAD!!!!

      :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 08, 2010, 08:06:30 PM
Oh no we've been discovered and outed,
He found out our secret and had it flouted,
Is there to be no peaceful rest,
From this limerick spouting pest,
Alas and alack the baron shouted.




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 09, 2010, 04:38:27 AM
 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

          Shame on me; a WEREWOLF, too unruly and old, to mind;
          Spilling MONSTERDOM'S Beast-kept Secrets; so unkind!
          Too late, now, this ruptured fence, to mend,
          Restoring, by means, Alchemical, Fiend, to Friend,
          How will these LIMERICKS end? I, too am, of TWO MINDS!

 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 10, 2010, 07:02:31 AM
Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~ Zombie In Luv ~~~ hmjfym ~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~ Zombie In Luv

            In continual effort, of trying, "to keep, up, with The JONESES",
            I'm, in MONSTERDOM'S Closet, rattling Skeleton's BONESES;
            From VAMPIRE, to GHOST, to MUMMY,
            {I confess, some, of them, are CRUMMY},
            Yet, I get, off my BUMMY, to ensure our LIMERICKS keep their THRONESES!

Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~ Zombie In Luv ~~~ hmjfym ~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~ Zombie In Luv
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 10, 2010, 07:21:44 PM
Yikes we just had a very close escape,
For the Baron has been doing swirling his cape,
He claims to be centuries old yet is on his toes,
Investigating our shrunken head one of many low blows,
However we'll forgive him has it was a very close scrape,

 
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 11, 2010, 06:34:03 PM
    ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

       I wouldn't have believed it; I consider it, NIFTY,
       I have the Honour, of posting, LIMERICK 1,050;
       Our UMA CREED,
       Only MONSTERS Bleed,
       We'll, never, concede, YOU BET YOUR BIPPY!

    ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 12, 2010, 02:45:49 PM
To my enthusiastic and esteemed Limericking comrades;

My posting habits have gotten quite lazy,
(this summer heat has been driving me crazy)
To keep our thread rolling along,
allow me to offer, Limerick 1,051,
But I regret, my creativity is somewhat hazy.
 
~~~ ???~~~ :P~~~ :-\~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 12, 2010, 07:42:19 PM
The Raven had a duel with known witchcraft,
And Dr Craven was in fear of the evil Scarabus' wrath,
Yet there were some funny moments,
From the Peter Lorre components,
Although by the end the castle was brought down in the aftermath.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 13, 2010, 04:38:54 AM
      Zombie In Luv ~~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~~~ Zombie Nuetral ~~~~~~ Zombie No Smile

             The legions, of ZOMBIES, dwelling, on-screen;  Zombie Cool
             Some, misunderstood; some, evil & mean,  Zombie Censored
             Some, became Cinematic Legends,  Zombie Roll Eyes
             Others, receive Honourable Mention,  Zombie Blush
             Whilst, a few, have been downright obscene!  Zombie Razz

      Zombie In Luv ~~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~~~ Zombie Nuetral ~~~~~~ Zombie No Smile
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 14, 2010, 01:02:20 PM
~~ cl:)~~ thrhrt~~ ededed~~

From castle ruins and Gothic towers,
and beasts of ancient lore,
to machete-wielding maniacs,
and ultra-violent gore.
From mad scientists playing God,
and tragic monsters in love,
to inbred mutant cannibal tribes,
and teenagers soaked in blood.
There was a time when horror was pure,
with timeless tales and themes,
when monster icons came to life,
and stalked the silver screen.

~~ je7u6ker6~~ hmjfym~~ 8j68j68ju~~








Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 14, 2010, 03:42:43 PM
Although the mummy had a leg that was lame,
He could always catch his victim all the same,
Beware the beat of the cloth wrapped feet,
Declared the Hammer poster on its one sheet,
My advice then is to relent yourself and play the game.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 15, 2010, 07:40:39 PM
FANTASTIC POEM, LLK! More, please, as they come, to you! ;D

                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 16, 2010, 06:15:34 PM
      :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o

             There, once, was a RIPPER, named JACK,
             For dismembering victims, had a KNACK,
             He'd flip, "HEADS, or, TAILS",
             And, as, for their ENTRAILS,
             He'd, often, take them, home, in a SACK!

      :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 16, 2010, 06:30:59 PM
His identity remains unknown,
Yet his legasy appears full blown,
He killed five women maybe more,
Although some suspect he left Britain's shore,
No one knows where he could have flown.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 16, 2010, 08:22:35 PM
     H46j7 ~~~~~~~ u6juu ~~~~~~~ chain_saw ~~~~~~~ 8j68j68ju

                   MR.HYDE, in like manner, to JACK, THE RIPPER,
                   Preferred a Break-fast Feast, of Salted KIPPER,
                   Then, out, into the NIGHT,
                   To savour one more BITE,
                   From the flesh, of a tawdry SOHO STRIPPER!

     H46j7 ~~~~~~~ u6juu ~~~~~~~ chain_saw ~~~~~~~ 8j68j68ju
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 17, 2010, 12:43:37 PM
 ::) ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ ::)  ~~~~~~~ :-X

            There, once, was a Flying Dinosaur, RHAMPHORHYNCHUS,
            Who evolved, into the modern-day jailbird, RAT-FINKUS,
            He, once, ruled the skies,
            Now, only, repeats lies,
            &, is responsible, for raising, up, too much Major STINKUS!

 ::) ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~~~ :-X ~~~~~~~ ::)  ~~~~~~~ :-X
                                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 18, 2010, 02:37:42 PM
There once was a master Barber, impeccably skillfull and neat,
who had a habit of making pies, with a dubious filling of meat,
you could have a close shave or a trim,
but your chance of survival was slim,
when visiting Sweeney Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for the kind words Baron!!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 18, 2010, 03:23:38 PM
LONG LIVE KONG,
You have, once, again, proven the reflective Truth, of my words.
Thanks, and... BRAVO!

EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 19, 2010, 04:55:46 PM
 :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~  :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o

            Once, whilst, in the Church loft, as I sang, in the choir,
            I noticed, outside, there appeared the start, of a fire,
            It arose, a smoky gray mist...
            After sundown... it did consist,
            Of the face & form, of a Blood-sucking VAMPIRE!

 :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~  :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 19, 2010, 09:44:58 PM
There was once was a guy by the name of Poe,
Who although a long time ago he was no ordinary Joe,
He wrote of mystery and of being buried alive,
But like his tell tale heart his madness did arrive,
Leaving us tales consisted of the Gothic and tales of woe.

Without Poe we would have no word for a poem, so rest easy on thy laurels great one and enjoy the genre you helped create.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 21, 2010, 03:03:26 AM
           ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;)

                     E. A. POE, was a REAL MAN, he ate Quiche,
                     His scary poems and stories established a Niche,
                     Despite his odd life,
                     Filled, with anguish & strife,
                     His greatest accomplishment was the *POE-BOY SANDWICH!

   *Spelled, on Menus, as THE PO'-BOY SANDWICH; Try one - Folks are RAVEN, about IT!

           ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;)
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 22, 2010, 04:39:33 PM
     thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt

            They exhumed the VAMPIRE, from his CRYPT,
            "Why, he, still, looks alive!" Someone Quipped.
            With night-fall descending,
            This has no happy ending,
            Except, for the Renevant, due, to the Jugulars he Ripped!

     thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ thrhrt
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 23, 2010, 02:18:04 PM
Tomorrow I go camping, to the Yorkshire Dales,
hoping for fine weather, free of rainfall and gales,
by day we'll go hiking,
at night drink like vikings,
 ;D Or toast marshmellows, and recite ghostly tales!!  :P

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Enjoy thy weekend, limericking cohorts!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 24, 2010, 06:17:10 AM
       8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8)

               The VAMPIRE slept, through the night,
               Dis-oriented, he awoke, in day-light,
               His last words were: "CRAP!"
               "I shouldn't have taken that nap!"
               I'm sure, we, all, can identify, with his plight.

       8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8)
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 24, 2010, 12:53:26 PM
    ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D

            FANG-MILY, Von WOLFSTEIN, I grant ye, is olde;
            Wealthy, yes; vast treasures, of jewels & gold,
            Yet, richer, beyond measure,
            Is Moi absolute pleasure,
            Of the knowledge, of FRIENDS, my Heart holds!

    ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 25, 2010, 04:43:25 PM
 Zombie Roll Eyes ~~ thrhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ Zombie Razz ~~ tynhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ Zombie Roll Eyes

              This Summer month is called, JULY;
              ... I, still, haven't figured, out, WHY,
              Howe'er, I'll attempt, to get SOBER,
              By that month, called, SEPTOBER,
              Yet, it, too, like, a VAMPIRE, will FLY!

 Zombie Roll Eyes ~~ thrhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ Zombie Razz ~~ tynhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ Zombie Roll Eyes
                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 26, 2010, 03:11:19 AM
       :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :-[

              My Wit and Wisdom, seem, reduced, to half,
              My brain needs washed! Ah, Yes! A Bubble-Bath;
              These zany topics drive me, mad,
              - Short trip; for which, I'm glad;
              My only reward: your reply, or, silent laugh!

       :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :-[
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 26, 2010, 12:05:26 PM
Double, double toil and trouble,
Goes the Baron's mind in a bubble,
Although squeaky clean,
There is still a chance of it being mean,
But in a nice way of course that goes double.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 27, 2010, 02:35:05 AM
        :o ~~~  thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~  thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ::)

              There, once, was a VAMPIRE, from Scranton;
              Limericks, about Blood, were his constant rantin'!
              No ifs, ands, or, buts,
              Ev'ryone thought him nuts,
              Yet, he'd rhyme, with no time, for recantin'!

        :o ~~~  thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~  thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ::)
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 28, 2010, 04:21:52 PM

There was a scientist with an audacious notion,
who created a miraculous and ingenious potion,
his uncanny home brew,
turned him see-through,
but filled him with arrogance, and twisted emotion.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 29, 2010, 03:14:47 AM
    :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ Zombie LOL

         There, once, was a MUMMY, named, BOB,
         Who was, unfortunately, known, as a SLOB;
         Female MUMMIES avoid him,
         Since his bandages weren't trim...
         He was last seen, all wrapped up, in THE BLOB!

    :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ ;) ~~~ Zombie LOL
                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 29, 2010, 07:27:26 PM
   :-[ ~~~~ :( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-*

              There, once, was a WEREWOLF, named, FRED;
              Who woke, up, to find himself, DEAD;
              He reached, into his GULLET,
              &, extracted a SILVER BULLET,
              "Eureka! Now, I'm a RICH MAN!"  He SAID.

   :-[ ~~~~ :( ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :-X ~~~~ :-*
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 30, 2010, 07:20:49 PM
 thrhrt  ~~~ je7u6ker6 ~~~  ededed ~~~ hmjfym ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie LOL

         Moste Faire, is our WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead,
         A UMA Topic, which hath, 25,976 times, been Read;
         We've adapted, quite, popularly, to this Plight,
         Ent'ring another season, o' Laughable Fright,
         In 24, our WEB o' SIGHTS, 26,000 Readers' brains hath Bled!

 thrhrt  ~~~ je7u6ker6 ~~~  ededed ~~~ hmjfym ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie LOL
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 30, 2010, 07:40:35 PM

In honor of your rhyming determination,
I defy my chronic, Limerick constipation,
and offer this rap,
albeit - rather crap,
with gibberish glee, and profound celebration!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Wicked Lester on July 30, 2010, 08:32:43 PM
OK,I'm game again. I remember this as a poem back 40 years ago in one of my mags we could order as kids thru the school.

Crack that bone , break that head
Beat little brother , til he's dead.
Throw him in the oven and turn it to bake
Remember to make room for the fudge ripple cake
Poor little brother shore wuz sweet.
The best little brother we ever did eat.
The ONLY sour part wuz a big red blister.
Next month on X-mas we'll have little sister. chain_saw

Pretty bizarre for a 1970? entry in a mag sold at a Catholic grammer school. But.... IIII like it and got in HUGE trouble when my P's found it. >:D
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 31, 2010, 03:34:20 AM
         ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D

               I honor, KONG, your rhyming determination,
               With gibberish glee and profound celebration!!!
               Your offered rap,
               Altho', hardly crap,
               Defies the essence, of chronic Limerick constipation!

         ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 31, 2010, 03:45:36 AM
WICKED LESTER,
   I recall that little epic... can't remember the mag, however, thanks, for your ghoulish input!
# 26,000 - BINGO!
Now, Onward!... to # 27,000!
MUA-HA-HA-HA-HA-ET-CE-TE-RA!!!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on July 31, 2010, 12:43:09 PM
So while we continue to serve this limerick slop,
There are those that can't wait for us to drop,
So we'll keep putting them out,
And in the course we will shout,
Hurrah for the limerick thread it will never stop.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on July 31, 2010, 03:24:13 PM
 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

            YUM! LIMERICK SLOP! Can I have another HELPING?!
            It occurs, to me; this is, rather, much, like, WHELPING!
            We give "Birth", to these li'l CRITTERS;
            Which, spawns, in our Brethren, JITTERS!
            These DOGS won't hunt; they're just MUTTS, A-YELPING!

 ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on July 31, 2010, 03:48:03 PM

So while we continue to serve this limerick slop,
There are those that can't wait for us to drop,

Is there really an element who are against our thread??
well to any naysayers I say "look elsewhere instead",
and to those who object,
take time to reflect,
we have given you fair warning: Irish Limericks lie ahead!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 01, 2010, 05:09:39 AM
         "we have given you fair warning: Irish Limericks lie ahead!"

          SPLENDID LLK Another sterling example, of circuitous logic!

   ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

        LONG LIVE KONG is a GOOD EGG & Subtly WITTY BLOKE,
        He turns a phrase, with the Elegance, o' the most WELL-SPOKE;
        Deftly, conjures images, TRUE,
        Nary, a syllable, doth he RUE,
        Punctuates, wisely, as he cracks jokes; leaving undisturbed YOKE!

   ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on August 01, 2010, 03:24:20 PM
Baron, with your daily input, this thread, you enliven,
and good old tv horror, my inspiration, you widen,
and completing my list,
is someone we've missed,
Whatever happened to Crazy1Ivan???

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 02, 2010, 12:13:13 AM
1van might be crazy,
But he sure ain't lazy,
He is just having break,
It's like slamming on a brake,
Sometimes the creative juices make us hazy.

As for you Mister Kong,
I thank you for the bong,
Singing my limerick praises,
Has made my head swell like the blazes,
And now I am in a swirl admitting that something is quite wrong.

As for our dear mentor the Baron,
He is like the watchful eye of Sauron,
Guiding us to creative pastures new,
That others fear to tread but a brave few,
We should elect him instead of Chancellor Gowron.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Dr.Teufel Geist on August 02, 2010, 01:22:12 AM
I once knew a fella named creepy
who by the life of me, was always so weepy
when asked why he's so deeply
he spun a tale that made me sleepy....


I once knew a painter named Scatter
who laughed ever so  like a mad hatter
he laughed so hard,that he lost control of his bladder
and sprinkled all those who walked under his ladder.....

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 02, 2010, 05:44:42 PM
   And, now, for a completely incongruent flying non-sequitor... ahhh, That's REFRESHMENT!  ;)

      :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-*

            There, once, was a Bloke, named BORIS,
            Who sang TENOR, in the UMA CHORUS,
            He hit the high notes, they say,
            Beside his Baritone partner, FJA,
            But, you couldn't see the Trees, for the FORREST!

      :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-* ~~~ :-*
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 02, 2010, 05:59:43 PM
There once was a creature from the old lagoon,
Who took it upon himself to mate with a balloon,
Easy does it now he growled,
But when it burst he could have howled,
For deprived of his new love he headed for the nearby saloon.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on August 03, 2010, 12:53:58 PM

Wolfman was a beast of cantankerous, moody ways,
prone to vexatious fits, of wild, tempestuous rage,
this latest full-moon hitch,
was a common canine itch,
those bloodsucking ticks had given him mange!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 03, 2010, 07:14:35 PM
BRAVO, LLK! I winced, as I can Identify, with his plight!

 >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:(

              My CASTLE is over-run, with Noisy GHOSTS,  tynhrt
              Each one, GHOST-WRITING "my" LIMERICK POSTS,  >:D
              So, any odd THREAD,  Zombie Censored
              About THE UNDEAD,  chain_saw
              Might be THEIRS, so, alas, I cannot BOAST...  :'(

 >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ >:(
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 04, 2010, 03:29:41 AM
          :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o

              There was a VAMPIRE, named, COUNT JIMMY-BOB;
              Noted, by the other UNDEAD, as a total SLOB,
              In a Nocturnal Dance Contest,
              He was, less, than the Best,
              Out-done, by DRAC & His Bride, in THE DANSE-MACABRE!

          :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 04, 2010, 05:45:14 PM
      :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o

               "GUILTY! We'll hang you!" They said, to YGOR.
               First time failed; they weren't allowed, to do more.
               Well, old YGOR found a new "FRIEND";
               The Jury member's lives, to end,
               They'd have Hanged him, again, if they knew, what was, in store!

      :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ >:( ~~~~~ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
          TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 05, 2010, 08:17:26 PM
 ededed ~~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed

              FRANKENSTEIN'S New BRIDE, wouldn't kiss Her Mate,
              She didn't know, much, save, she'd, not, accept this Fate;
              A Victim, of innocent Distortion,
              She blew the Issue, out, of Proportion,
              So, did Her sad GROOM - BOOM! Change Her mind? TOO LATE!

 ededed ~~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 06, 2010, 06:35:48 PM
    ::) ~~~ thrhrt   ~~~ ::) ~~~  thrhrt  ~~~ ::) ~~~  thrhrt  ~~~ ::)

                    She, really, didn't like being a VAMPIRE;
                    The lust, for Blood, made her perspire,
                    DRACULA'S DAUGHTER,
                    Really burnt her Father;
                    Ashes-to-ashes, on a FUNERAL PYRE!

    ::) ~~~ thrhrt   ~~~ ::) ~~~  thrhrt  ~~~ ::) ~~~  thrhrt  ~~~ ::)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 08, 2010, 07:23:52 PM
   thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ Zombie Alien ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt

            A weekend, away; to find, that, down the list, we've fallen,
            Arrived home, moments, ago; I hear the computer callin',
            2 days, we wandered fossil shops,
            Viewing Trilobites, to Triceratops;
            Back, now, to: FRANKENSTEIN, VAMPIRES & WEREWOLVES Maulin'!

   thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ Zombie Alien ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 08, 2010, 10:55:21 PM
The Baron has a limerick pang,
That won't go away dang,
So with this one as a pun,
He'll feel at home what fun,
Well it sure beats him with a broken fang.
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 08, 2010, 11:01:03 PM
I might be a bit of a bore,
But at least I don't snore,
While writing the odd rhyme,
As it sure beats the daily grime,
And makes it hard for others to ignore.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 09, 2010, 08:40:18 PM
My indubitably, Dubliny, double-trouble, toiling bubble, tolling Brother, TV HORROR:
... THANKS, for ye royal input!

        ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::)

                 I tuned, in, tonight, as : (Read 26262 times),
                 Which, in & of itself, is quite a melodic rhyme,
                 WARNING: Irish Limericks A-borning;
                 In Knighty-night, or mourning morning,
                 This Topic, to pick, a peck, o' trouble, always, Blows, up, MIMES!

        ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::)

                                                INSCRUTABLE!
                                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
               TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 09, 2010, 11:48:11 PM
The Baron comes off with some great vocabulary,
And one of these days arrested by the constabulary,
Kicking and screaming he will go,
While I laugh at his great show,
Making the number one werewolf a Talbot called larry.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 10, 2010, 06:35:41 PM
   :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o

              There, once, was a nasty Fellow, named HYDE,
              Who took his "Better Half", on a Wild Ride;
              He murdered DR. JEKYLL, then,
              Which brought, about his own end,
              ... So, much, for the Blind, Raging, evil, of PRIDE!

   :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 10, 2010, 06:52:34 PM
Although my Mister Hyde side may reek,
I have been told my good side is very sleek,
So if you should approach me,
It will be courteous to you I'll be,
While on bathnight you should hear me shriek.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 12, 2010, 02:18:41 AM
         :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :'(

                 A SWAMP-MONSTER crawled, onto LAND,
                 Saying, that, ITS name was FERDINAND,
                 HOLLYWOOD made the Movie,
                 Of Its Life Story, quite, GROOVY,
                 Yet, I read, that, the sequel was CANNED.

         :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :'(
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 12, 2010, 03:13:59 PM
        Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool

              There, once, was a GHOUL, named RASTUS,
              And, we'd answer whatever he'd asked us;
              With FANGS and CLAWS, MEAN,
              He'd eat, up, your SPLEEN,
              Of, all, MONSTERS, ol' RASTUS was FASTEST!

        Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Cool
                             EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 12, 2010, 05:55:26 PM
 ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed

                    FRANKENSTEIN'S BRIDE was "born" no BIMBO,
                    'Tho' she stood, tall, with her arms, all, akimbo,
                    She wouldn't, ever, "put out",
                    For that green-skinned Lout,
                    'Cos Her DOC, had a lock, on her Heart; ONLY, HIM, BRO!

 ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
            TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 13, 2010, 04:38:55 PM
      :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o

           THE MUMMY lisped: "You can run, but, you cannot hide!"
           Shame, on me, for re-awakening him; 'twas due, to my pride,
           I cannot, now, undo the evil, of the Mystic Spell;
           Vile Incantation, which hath wrought a living hell,
           So, I appealed, to ISIS: as he melted, into dust, he cried!

      :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 14, 2010, 05:59:16 AM
 8) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :)

          There, once, was SHERLOCK, a most famous Detective;
          He'd investigate clues, to discover what was defective,
          DR. WATSON, his droll sidekick,
          Oft, seemed, thick, as a brick.
          Was it, only, an "elementary" trick, to gain better perspective?

 8) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :D ~~~~~ ;) ~~~~~ :)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 14, 2010, 12:30:55 PM
An actor has a lot of fine tricks to hone,
Thats why his agent gets called on the phone,
So if they need those fine chiseled features,
They'll ask around the acting teachers,
But in the end they all want Basil Rathbone.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 14, 2010, 09:04:56 PM
      :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-* ~~~~   ededed   ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*

               Some Actors earn respect; whilst, at others, some scoff,
               Talent vs. Personality, an Issue debated, by learned Profs.,
               Some actors, superbly, have both,
               Some, have neither, which we loathe,
               Howe'er, the Thespic Breed's Best, was BORIS KARLOFF!

      :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-* ~~~~   ededed   ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 15, 2010, 12:37:03 PM
 8) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-*

          This is the 75th page, that, we're on;  ;D
          MONSTER Limericks adorn every one, thrhrt  ededed

          There appears, to be no end, in sight,  8)

          {Doesn't that give you frights?!} tynhrt

          Share your insights, with olde BARON Von!  ::)

 8) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ 8) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-*
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 16, 2010, 02:42:59 AM
   Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Confused

          There was a Limerick, about CLASSIC MONSTERS;
          It drove the UNIVERSAL MONSTER ARMY BONKERS!
          GENERAL TERRY went so MAD,
          He left his MINNESOTA PAD;
          Last seen, snockered, in a HARD ROCK Bar, in YONKERS!

   Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Confused
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 16, 2010, 02:31:15 PM
One of our members is under the weather,
And I know from reports he's as light as a feather,
The unknown primate is his UMA name,
Let us all wish him a great recovery all the same,
one way or the other he will rise out of his cushy leather.

Get well soon, my friend
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 16, 2010, 05:43:21 PM
     :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-*

             There's a UMA Soldier, named, UNKNOWN PRIMATE,  C:)
             Who, truth be told, has been miserable, of late,  :'(
             But, like, the Phoenix, arising, from ashes,  :o
             Or, most ape-ropo, yer Fadder's moustaches,  8)
             He's, now, on the mend, and, shall, soon, feel great!  ;D

     :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :-*
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 17, 2010, 03:32:22 AM
       :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'(

              A BELA-ted HAPPY HEAVEN-BIRTH, MASTER LUGOSI!
             ---------------------------------------------------

              'Twas the Death-day, #54, of the Late BELA LUGOSI,
              Who's Film Career, We have followed, most closely,
              From COUNT DRACULA, on,
              {He was called, "POPS", by LON},
              This Wine-glass, I raise, to his Memory, in Honourable Toast, LEE!

       :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'(

      As I was about to sign out, after this LIMERICK, I noticed the uncanny synchronicity, of the ever-changing Banner:
                                          Quote of the moment:
      The spider spinning his web for the unwary fly. The blood is the life, Mr. Renfield. - Dracula

   So, I just had to include it, in this serendipitous remembrance... and, yes, LEE is CHRISTOPHER LEE, who assumed the DRACULA Mantle, in the same year, as BELA'S Mortal Departure, from The Stage Terrestrial... ;)  thrhrt

                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on August 17, 2010, 04:49:59 PM
The doctor's creation longed for a bride,
to bring him peace, only love could provide,
but his romantic ambition,
would end in attrition,
a manmade broken heart, and a monsters hurt pride.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On being nosy, I have learned some information,
that TV horror has a unique, Irish limerick qualification,
an interesting fact,
that I find rather apt,
his profile states that Belfast, is his current location!








Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 17, 2010, 07:44:11 PM
Long live Kong is right,
It would take a very long flight,
To view me in my habitat,
Limerick's abound this and that,
On the Emerald isle I now take plight.

P.S
You're not nosy, you've just come up smelling like a posy, and in my book that's just rosy! 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 18, 2010, 07:11:46 PM
           :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ::)

              The CREATURE, from, out, yon BLACK LAGOON, didst spring;
              To capture yon Human female; to Mate - 'twas his thing;
              This story may seem fishy,
              As gossip, 'tis, still, dishy,
              He was, not, washy-wishy, too bad, he didn't offer her a ring!

           :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ ::)
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 19, 2010, 07:07:04 PM
 tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt

               There, once, was a GHOST, named, VISCOUS LOUIE,
               Whose ECTOPLASM, 'tis said, is, unbelievably, GOOEY;
               So, at the stroke of MID-NIGHT,
               You'd best get, out, of SIGHT,
               Lest, you be SLIMED, at that time, by this sound: "KER-PLOOIE!!!"

 tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt ~~~~ tynhrt
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
              TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 20, 2010, 03:19:18 AM
      :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-*

            I sing, a sad ODE, to this hot day, of AUGUST 20,
            Of SUMMERTIME'S Number, remaining, not, MANY;
            In Memory, from my "PERSONAL STASH",
            I prized, most, THE MONSTER BASH,
            Most Memorable, that CHAPMAN; our own, UNCLE BENNY!

      :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-*
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 21, 2010, 03:43:33 PM
        :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)

               I read, about a devilish GIANT CRAB, that invaded ALASKA,
               Whose vile RAMPAGE, took that poor State, to TASK-A!
               Those folks' Moms didn't raise no FOOLS,
               They heated, up, an OLYMPIC-SIZED POOL;
               Boiled IT, into CRAB-CAKES; saved ITS SHELL, to make MASK-A!

        :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::)
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 21, 2010, 09:09:36 PM
The wicked witch of the West,
Was far scarier to that I can attest,
Than that pink floozy Glenda,
At times she was more like Glen than Glenda,
However Ed Wood would win hands down without a vest.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 22, 2010, 06:18:10 AM
         ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

               We've seen, how, The WICKED WITCH, OF THE EAST,
               On DOROTHY & TOTO, wished, that, she could FEAST,
               To DOROTHY'S House, she tried, to DROP, IN,
               But, The HOUSE, pinned her, down, for The WIN,
               Curled her, into Oblivion; her RUBY SLIPPERS, Proof, of DE-FEET!

         ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                        EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 23, 2010, 04:13:46 AM
      :-* ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

                 We keep plugging, on, without much activity,
                 This niche, of threads, unmoved, since yesterday,
                 'Twas a late Summer's Sunday,
                 Too lazy, to research PUN-PLAY,
                 So, onward, we plow, with our LIMERICK Proclivity!

      :-* ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 23, 2010, 06:17:59 PM
What about the insidious Dr Fu Manchu,
There was not much that he could not do,
So while I was being tortured on his rack,
I tackled  the subject of a limerick attack,
He was very polite until another turn made him go blue.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 24, 2010, 05:28:35 PM
 >:D~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D

     Topic: WARNING: Irish Limericks Ahead  (Read 26656 times)
         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
             This Topic has, only, ten more Readers, to go,
             'Til 26,666 times, the Post-Counter will show;
             Arcane, and, vile,
             It's taken, awhile;
            GOD save the poor devil, who has that mark beastowed!

 >:D~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D ~~~~ >:D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 25, 2010, 03:09:43 PM
 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

             COUNT DRACULA decided, to take a new VAMPIRE BRIDE,
             From the Mid-West U.S., so, He chose KENTUCKY FRIED;
             A Real Beauty, was she - HOT DANG!
             Alas, she was sans teeth, so, NO FANGS;
             Arising, UNDEAD; her dentures fell, out! Embarrassed, she CRIED!

 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
             TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 26, 2010, 03:16:39 AM
    :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :o

             The MONSTER lumbered, on, through the gloomy FOREST,
             'Til he ended, up, in the Funeral Vault, with DR. PRETORIUS,
             Wanting, only, a BRIDE; FRIEND; MATE;
             One little catch - She'd, always, be LATE,
             A DEATH, worse, than FATE, she'd know, at the Hand, of BORIS!

    :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ :o
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.


Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 26, 2010, 07:20:06 PM
 Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ :-*

               There, once, was a GHOUL, named SAM,
               Who reduced, all, of his victims, to SPAM,
               Not, like, The SPAM, on COMPUTERS;
               He, also, kept Ads, from HOOTERS,
               & FRANKENSTEIN pics, of the EXPLODING DAM!

 Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ ededed ~~~ :-*
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 26, 2010, 09:27:44 PM
The baron is beginning to look like a shaggy dog,
But bless his werewolf hide he is the limericks main cog,
Without his continued rhyming thrust,
This thread would end up in the dust,
Leaving us mere mortals feeling about in the UMA fog.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 27, 2010, 04:26:51 AM

             SPECIAL THANKS, to OUR BROTHER, MAURICE!

 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :-*

        There, once, was an evil MONSTER, MOE,
        Who, if you'd catch him, by the TOE,
        Down, in ol' Hoot 'n' HOLLER,
        Would throw you a silver DOLLAR,
        If you'd let him go... once released, he'd GLOW!

       { He was born, in the '70's, where he modeled, for AURORA! ;) }

 :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :-*
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 27, 2010, 04:47:37 PM
 :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :'(

               There, once, was a MEDIUM, renowned, for telepathy,
               Who knew when his friends would be struck, with leprosy,
               His own nose blew, off,
               When he started, to cough,
               Now, he's pushing up daisies, as well as, other sweet posies.

 :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :'(
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 28, 2010, 06:45:58 AM
     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o

          It's, just, another typical SATURDAY IN THE PARK;
          I'm being chased, by JASON VOORHEES; what a LARK!
          That Big Guy, with the mean MACHETE,
          Wants, to chop, me, into SPAGHETTI,
          I'd rather kiss a YETI, than be filled, with TERROR, STARK!

     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 28, 2010, 12:45:31 PM
A Pleasure as always Tim, I live to serve.


The creature fought them all because he was mean,
From foot soldiers to tanks but none could make it lean,
However there was one brave soul with some mercy,
It was a little girl whom the town knew as Marcy,
She went to the creatures feet and shouted it's to early for Halloween,
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 29, 2010, 02:43:19 AM
  :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o

              QUASIMODO announced, that, he had had, enough;
              His misshapen appearance had made his life, too rough,
              With the operation's success,
              He was, rather, perplexed,
              To be jeered, as THE HUNCH-LACK, OF NO-MORE FAME!

  :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :'( ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 29, 2010, 04:37:00 PM
 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

          COUNT DRACULA, swirled, out, of the mist, in the bog;
          Misjudging his footing, he slipped, on a leaping bullfrog,
          Into the swamp, DRAC went "KER-SPLAT!"
          Amidst mud, goop, and, slime, He sat;
          In fuming frustration, The VAMPIRE howled, like, a dog!

 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2010, 01:04:08 AM
    ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~  :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D

         The Month, of AUGUST, now, spirals, to an August CLOSE,
         September, soon, will be A-HEAD, by Ye Proverbial NOSE,
         The JACK-O'-LANTERN'S SMILE and EYES,
         Will be, for UMA-ers, OCTOBER'S SURPRISE,
         Then, again, on, to DECEMBER'S End; that's how, A.D. 2010, GOES!

    ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~  :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 30, 2010, 06:52:42 PM
 :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o

                There, once, was an Italian VAMPIRE, PASQUALE,
                Who'd attack his victims, in Medieval BACK ALLEYS,
                Even, GARLIC suited His Noble Epicurean TASTE,
                He'd slurp BLOOD, like, it was TOMATO PASTE,
                SO, AVOID HIM, LIKE, THE PLAGUE, BY GOLLY!

 :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ :o
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
    TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 31, 2010, 08:44:05 AM
Igor decided to go it alone,
Firstly he needed the plans on loan,
He would impress his old master,
With a creature made of plaster,
The rain came and melted his prize with a groan.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on August 31, 2010, 12:14:18 PM
There was a machine, that in the blink of an eye,
could teleport a man from New York to Shanghai,
whilst testing his device,
the inventor paid a price,
behold the beast with the trunk of a man, and the head of a FLY!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on August 31, 2010, 01:24:17 PM
The vampire was eyeing the man's throat,
Maybe I'll get him when he sleeps I hope,
Oh I can't wait my tongue it burns,
Wait he begins to close his eyes as he turns,
Drat I just remembered who's going to row the boat.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on August 31, 2010, 06:19:13 PM
     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

        A pleasure, to be joined, by TV HORROR & LONG LIVE KONG,
        Adding their TWO LIMERICK CENTS, as we move, along,
        To see our readership reach one + Million, strong,
        What Bliss, to have our names, enshrined, among,
        Why, just, the raw potential, fills my MONSTER-KID Heart, with Song!

     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on August 31, 2010, 07:33:13 PM
  In vast, abysmal trenches,
  too deep for human eyes,
  where net or camera cannot reach,
  where serpents surely hide,
  where every dive reveals new creatures,
  of fantastic, uncanny design,
  I wait with childlike wonder,
  at what secrets we may find.
  For those who dream of alien worlds,
  they could look closer to home,
  at the murky depths of our open seas,
  the original twilight zone!
  
  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 01, 2010, 03:11:31 AM
LLK,
   A LIMBER-KICK, of beautiful, wise Thought, depicted, rather, than a LIMERICK; yet{i}, EXQUISITE,  and, MOST WELCOME, None-the-less, my BROTHER!
EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 01, 2010, 03:18:46 AM
 tynhrt ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie In Luv ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ tynhrt

             There, once, was a UMA LIMERICK THREAD,
             Impossible, to kill, 'cos it is UNDEAD,
             'Tis a MONSTER you can't FIGHT,
             'Cos it has FANGS, that BITE,
             Happily, this, is another one, BLOOD-READ!

 tynhrt ~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie In Luv ~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~ tynhrt
                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 01, 2010, 03:45:56 PM
                Topic: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead  (Read 26933 times)
Only 67 readers needed, to induce the birth, of 27,000! THANK YOU, ALL, BELOVED UMA READERS!

 8) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ 8) ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*

               We've arrived, at a WHOPPING PAGE, SEVENTY-SEVEN,
               Indeed, all, of our LIMERICKS are reminiscent, of HEAVEN,
               Wholesome CLASSIC MONSTER FUN,
               Forget the gun, if you run, with a PUN,
               Our visceral weapon, to make your brain-salad LEAVEN!

 8) ~~~ ;D ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :) ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;D ~~~ 8) ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on September 01, 2010, 04:10:35 PM
A dutiful sheriff, by the name of Brody, set sail with a wily old skipper,
to rid his island of a troublesome fish, a most ravenous, beastly critter,
a shark with a grisly favourite food,
of bikini babes and surfer dudes,
but alas, blown to smithereens, like a rocket-propelled kipper!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




~~~~ Dear Baron, I thank you, for your kind, encouraging words! ~~~~

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 01, 2010, 04:46:39 PM

        ~~~~ Dear Baron, I thank you, for your kind, encouraging words! ~~~~

Dear Brother, LONG LIVE KONG,
   You remind me, of my old friend, HANNIBAL LECTER. H46j7
   His MOTTO: "STAND AND DE-LIVER!"
   You did, again, in your JAWS LIMERICK Tribute!

    Cannily devised, with descriptive insight, throughout; HOWEVER, your Punch-Line ROCKED!
 "but alas, blown to smithereens, like a rocket-propelled kipper!!" left me, in a fit, of laughter!
THANK YOU!!!!
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
         TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 01, 2010, 06:54:50 PM
With a Hell bent shriek,
She left others feeling meek,
Who could this be to make the grade,
I'll give you a clue she played a famous maid,
She was Una O'Connor with a nose for a beak.

In honour of a fellow Belfast native.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on September 02, 2010, 02:38:54 PM

Norman Bates was a troubled boy, with a complex like no other,
if Sigmund Freud were to pick his brain, he'd quickly run for cover,
without any friends or a spouse,
he lived in an old spooky house,
with the withered stuffed remains, of his late tyrannical mother!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~








Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 02, 2010, 07:27:27 PM
Spiffily splendiforous! LLK! You master BATES' lore, like, a Trooper!

        thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ :o

                    On a Picnic, went RENFIELD & FRITZ, that odd, rare, PAIR,
                    French Flies & Fire-roasted foot-longs, their chosen FARE,
                    Renfield drank BLOOD,
                    Fritz, the usual SUDS,
                    DRAC & FRANKIE appeared & gave them a GHOULISHLY GOOD SCARE!

        thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ :o
                                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
                TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 03, 2010, 05:10:51 PM
 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

            MINA was no dog; she was loved, by JONATHAN HARKER,
            Under DRACULA'S thrall, she became a Wolfish BARKER,
            Van HELSING remedied the SITUATION;
            Took MINA, on a TRANSYLVANIA VACATION,
            Treated DRACULA, to a STAKE Dinner, lest, he go BERSERKER!

 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 04, 2010, 09:33:13 PM
         :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o

               There, once, was a MUMMY, whose fiendish wrath,
               Was, to drown, all, of his foes, in a boiling bath,
               As his next victim, I was no fool,
               When I saw his "mystic pool",
               I tossed him, in, instead - "instant mud-pie!" I laughed!

         :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 05, 2010, 06:18:59 AM
   :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :(

         Giant Reptiles have, always, gotten the short end, of the stick,
         The Silver Screen has used them, to provide kids, with kicks,
         We marvel, at their atrocious power,
         At their jaws and claws, we cower;
         They prove no match, for humans, as they were thick, as a brick.

   :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ??? ~~~~~ :(
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 05, 2010, 07:44:17 PM
 Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~  Zombie Razz

           There once was a ZOMBIE, unnamed,
           Who's appetite was, likewise, untamed,
           He would devour your spleen
           With ravenous hunger, mean,
           But, his favourite portion was brain - duh!

 Zombie Razz ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~  Zombie Razz
                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 06, 2010, 01:57:45 PM
    ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*

              Me Most Favourite 'Oliday is ALL-HALLOWS'-E'EN,
              Dressed, up, for It, long, before I was a Teen,
              Been ev'ry FAMOUS MONSTER, in the Book,
              'Ad I pictures, you could, all, 'ave a Look;
              Oft-times, I'm me Clown-self: LUCKY OLDE BEANE!

    ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :-*
                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 08, 2010, 01:57:14 AM
    ::) ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :( ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :( ~~~~ :o

              There was, once, a very odd Witch, named Mitch,
              Who's magickal potions, always, gave him an itch,
              Hideous allergies, so, severe,
              That, rash spread, ear-to-ear,
              An atypical glitch, which forced him, to live, in a ditch.

    ::) ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :( ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ >:( ~~~~ :( ~~~~ :o
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 08, 2010, 10:10:18 PM
At long last he was caught the notorious Fly,
Saved from the pressing machine he didn't die,
The authorities threw the book at him,
And sentenced him to death at a whim,
There was some good news his cellmate was Dwight Frye!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 09, 2010, 03:44:00 AM
     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o

            There, once, was a MONSTROUS, SLIMY, TOAD,
            Whose HORRID SALIVA, solid steel could corrode,
            He dissolved Infrastructures,
            An Electrical System, he punctured...
            A Great CONDUCTOR, he discovered his fate, ill-bode!

     :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o
                          EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 09, 2010, 07:56:47 AM
That Jennifer was something of a hottie
But she ate her friends' organs, and acted naughty
So her BFF became a real hater
and decided to eviscerate her.
Now you don't need to waste time watching JENNIFER'S BODY
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 09, 2010, 08:02:38 AM
When Rabbi Lowe created his Homonculus
he never intended it to be one of us
He just wanted to save the Jews
from the emperor's bigoted views
But Der Golem rampaged and raised quite a fuss
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 09, 2010, 08:19:33 AM
Rhoda Penmark was really a BAD SEED
The charming child lived only for greed
She killed a classmate and at least two others
till she was poisoned by her own sweet dear mother
But all she wanted was for Claude Daigle to concede
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 09, 2010, 07:50:27 PM
                  HEX-CELLENT CONTRIBUTIONS, DEAR FELLOW!

     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D

              There has, now, returned, our Brother, CRAZY IVAN,
              We'll, no longer, be sad, nor, tears, will we be CRYIN';
              We've missed him, DREADFULLY,
              And, all, of his LIMERICK MEDLEY,
              WELCOME HOME, My BROTHER, Your Colours, we're FLYIN'!!!

     ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 09, 2010, 09:54:52 PM
Gaston Morrell's puppet shows were quite thrillin'
But his paintings were haunting, and chillin'
Not because he was weird
did they call him BLUEBEARD
Rather, it was habit of lady killin'
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 09, 2010, 10:04:27 PM
Thanks, Baron; good to be back 
I thank you and others for taking up my slack
This is just one of my stops
whilest I'm on the run from the cops
At least till the next full moon I'll be harder to track
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 10, 2010, 03:03:25 AM
     ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)

           There, once, was an ACTOR, named BELA,
           Who rings a bell, as a most remarkable fella;
           No desire, to be, out-classed,
           By TV HORROR, from BELFAST,
           The BATS, in BELA'S Belfry, made him a great story-tella!

     ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)
                                EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 10, 2010, 06:04:15 PM
I've now made it into prose,
What an honour my chest grows,
Thank you oh great and mighty Tim,
And even better news the return of Ivan all trim,
As Stan Lee once exclaimed excelsior our fair wind also blows.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 11, 2010, 01:53:03 PM
          :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'(

                 Hatred is the MONSTER, of deformed proportion,
                 September 11th, a day, of most tragic distortion,
                 9 years, it has ruled our Psyche;
                 We've coped, & grown, most likely,
                 Beyond the fear, that plays, upon sympathetic extortion.

          :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'(
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 12, 2010, 07:02:51 PM
To Kevin McCarthy I would like to sing his praise,
What a great performer and so full of grace,
His iconic yell they're comin,
Would have heartrates strummin,
God rest ye merry gentleman all glasses raise.

Rest in peace Kevin and I thank you for all the times I've enjoyed your work.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 12, 2010, 07:05:01 PM
 tynhrt ~~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~~ tynhrt

        There, once, was a MONSTER, named TERRIBLE TOMMY,
        Who lived, in a CYBER-PIT, which drove Him, quite, BALMY,
        This WRAITH proved, to be, THE EPITOME,
        As He engaged, in a WILD HAUNTING SPREE;
        He attacked me, and, I cried, "EEEEEEEEE! PITY ME, TOMMY!"

 tynhrt ~~~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie Cool ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie Roll Eyes ~~~~~ tynhrt
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 13, 2010, 04:10:52 AM
   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D

          There was an Abominable CREATURE, called SLUDGE,
          A Nasty-Tempered Critter, who carried a GRUDGE;
          He sought, to give Folks a WHOPPING,
          Instead, they started SLUDGE-CHOPPING,
          Turns, out, he yielded a half-ton, of really tasty FUDGE!

   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 13, 2010, 05:25:33 PM
 Zombie Cool ~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~~ Zombie Shocked

       There, once, was a Ravenous ZOMBIE, named FRED,
       Who, whence awakening, in his cheap coffin, UNDEAD,
       Watched, as the local Blue-Bloods, all, ran,
       Lest, he proved, to them, that, he can,
       Demonstrate, that, their Noble Blood wasn't Blue, but, RED!

 Zombie Cool ~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~ Zombie LOL ~~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~~ Zombie Razz ~~~~ Zombie Shocked
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 14, 2010, 04:43:57 AM
   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :-*

        There, once, was a Dangerous GIANT COMET,
        Composed, entirely, of residue, of ALIEN VOMIT,
        It HURLED, through SPACE,
        With remarkable GRACE;
        On crash-landing, was reduced, so much, you could PALM IT!

   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ 8) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :-*
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 14, 2010, 05:58:01 PM
    thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

             The lone VAMPIRE flew, out, of his darkened CRYPT,
             In search, of warm Blood, a Treat, to be sipped,
             Traveling, through the night air,
             With, nary, concern, nor, care...
             'Til he realized: "I forgot my dentures!" He felt ill-equipped!

    thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt
                                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.  



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 15, 2010, 06:54:57 PM
      8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8)

             There, once, was a STORYLINE GAME,  ;D
             To bring our dear olde UMA FAME,  :o
             The Scripting is FREE-FORM,  :-[
             Improvisation is the NORM,  >:D
             Composing a LIMERICK is, just, the SAME!  :-*  ;)

      8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8) ~~~ 8)
                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 16, 2010, 05:47:57 PM
 :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;)

          THE WOLF MAN had finished his grisly meal,
          It's, now, known, as "KEEPIN' IT REAL";
          Although, Gory, as hell,
          Tickets didn't sell, well;
          Beautiful Ladies upped the film's sex appeal.

 :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;)
                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 17, 2010, 06:36:24 PM
    ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)

           There, once, was a Throw-back CREATURE, Prehistoric,
           Who swam, in the Black Lagoon, poetically, stoic,
           Humans, with a Female, suddenly, invaded,
           He realized his desire, to her, to be Mated,
           Until they cured him, with a strong dose, of Paragoric!

    ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 18, 2010, 08:58:08 AM
 tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt

           There, once, was an ADDAMS, named, FESTER,
           Who, as a BANE, to normal folk, would PESTER,
           He'd jump, out, and, yell "BOO!",
           At people, like, YOU;
           Am I HE? So CLEVER! You GUESSED 'ER, CHESTER!

                                    BOO! ;)

 tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt ~~ tynhrt
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 19, 2010, 08:28:59 AM
 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

             There, once, was a VAMPIRE, IVAN, from KURSK,
             Who, to find Victims, the Internet, would LURK,
             When he'd spot likely Prey,
             He'd type: "Have a nice DAY!"
             But, he meet them, after sundown, then, go BERSERK!

                 HAVE A NICE DAY! MUA-HA-HA-HA-ET-CETERA!

 thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ thrhrt

                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 19, 2010, 03:51:52 PM
      ;D ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ tynhrt

           This LIMERICK Thread slides, down the Line, really, fast;
           As if, Its Days, of Importance, were a Thing, of the Past,
           We'll keep soldiering, on,
           Less brain, &, more brawn,
           Until a Readership, of One Million, we've achieved, at last!

      ;D ~~~ :-* ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ tynhrt
                                  EXANIMO EVERNOW,
   TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 19, 2010, 07:45:51 PM
   :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o

          There, once, was a GIANT ALLIGATOR;
          Ate People, like FRENCH-FRIED POTATERS,
          The Ketch-up, was BLOOD,
          It poured, like, a FLOOD,
          He devoured my entire ALMA MATER!

   :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o ~~~ :o
                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Unknown Primate on September 19, 2010, 07:53:40 PM
Really diggin' your latest lims, good Baron!  Awesome!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 20, 2010, 02:10:06 AM
Really diggin' your latest lims, good Baron!  Awesome!

         THANKS, UP; For your kind remark, I've woven you, into one, as well! ;)

          ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*

                Our Brother, UNKNOWN PRIMATE, really "digs my LIMS",
                I keep them, Pumped & Exercised, in my MENTAL GYM,
                You can see my Bulging BRAINS,
                And, Say:"That's just INSANE!",
                A Typical Refrain, for LIMS, built, on a Moment's WHIM!

          ;D ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.  
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on September 20, 2010, 05:07:46 PM
There once was a limerick planet
Whose best poet ate half a pomegranate
Now they're suffering a dearth
cause he spends time on Earth
They shouldn't have taken the Baron for granted
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 20, 2010, 05:48:05 PM
     :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o

              The MUMMY was wrapped, up, in a dubious ENIGMA,
              Was his CURSE, real, or, of his Imagination, a FIGMA,
              3,000 years, of no chance, to PEE,
              Until, he smelled TANA LEAF TEA;
              Left his SARCOPHAGUS, in the Dust, in a Hurry, BIG, MA!

     :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 21, 2010, 04:21:16 AM
There once was a limerick planet
Whose best poet ate half a pomegranate
Now they're suffering a dearth
cause he spends time on Earth
They shouldn't have taken the Baron for granted

BROTHER IVAN,
   My Apologies! I missed the fact, that, you graced page 79, with the final LIMERICK Input...
So, I am presuming, that, our millions, of other Readers, might have might missed it, too... Therefore, I've taken the liberty, of bringing it, foreward, onto PAGE # 80...
... A Landmark Achievement... Never, have so few, done so much, with so little, for so many!
                                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 21, 2010, 06:15:08 PM
 :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o

          There, once, was a GHOST, of a CHANCE,
          Who said, that, his name was ROSENCRANTZ,
          He appeared, during the day,
          Of an olde SHAKESPEARE Play,
          In a small HAMLET, in DENMARK, to DANCE!

 :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ :o
                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 22, 2010, 07:00:11 PM
          ;) ~~ :) ~~ :D ~~ ;D ~~ ::) ~~ ;D ~~ :D ~~ ;) ~~ :)

              There, once, was a JAZZ SINGER, named SCAT,
              Who was, undoubtedly, one HIP, COOL, CAT,
              His SPOOKY LYRICS were TERSE,
              Ranging, from BAT, to VERSE,
              He rehearsed, in a Hearse, &, "HE'S WHERE IT'S AT!"

          ;) ~~ :) ~~ :D ~~ ;D ~~ ::) ~~ ;D ~~ :D ~~ ;) ~~ :)
                              EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 

 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 22, 2010, 10:42:14 PM
Who is that fiend with the hairy face,
He seems to grace our limerick thread at a pace,
The beast is a work horse,
But he keeps plowing until he's hoarse,
Why it's the baron no less and no one can take his place.


If this keeps up we'll have to rename the thread the Baron's brogue!
well done my friend.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 22, 2010, 10:56:50 PM
There once were two kid's named Flora and Miles,
Their governess scolded them to keep off the tiles,
Why you naughty kid's oh I'm so cross,
Now the Master will be at a loss,
First it was Jessel and Quint filling you with their venomous bile's.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 23, 2010, 04:53:41 PM
Who could forget the great Lugosi stare,
And those spidery fingers pointed with his glare,
Poor Mr Renfield was absolutely terrified,
As he explored below deck it left him petrified,
His only defence was madness as he stood upon the stair.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on September 23, 2010, 06:58:59 PM
A ghost sometimes misconstrues
the meanings of words that we use.
One time in a frolic
tried to scare an alcoholic,
But was welcomed for bringing him "BOO's"!
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 23, 2010, 07:24:39 PM
     :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o

             OMIGOD! A Verifiable LIMERICK, from Bro. PACKY!
             GHOST-POSTIE, quite TASTY; Definitely, SNACKY!
             Still, PAUL'S, all, the RAGE,
             Freed, from His RIB-CAGE,
             Now, after STRETCHING, we'll release him, from THE RACKY!

     :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ :o
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.  
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 23, 2010, 07:37:10 PM
 u6juu ~~~ chain_saw ~~~ ggege sfsrefs ~~~ 8j68j68ju ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie In Luv

            A Triple-Header, giv'n, by our young IRISH WONDER,
            Created, by TV HORROR/MAURICE, with, nary, a BLUNDER;
            Luv, Luv Them, DO,
            They, always, ring, TRUE,
            We're Grateful, to have him, here, 'tho' he tear us, ASUNDER!

 u6juu ~~~ chain_saw ~~~ ggege sfsrefs ~~~ 8j68j68ju ~~~ Zombie Shocked ~~~ Zombie In Luv
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 



 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 24, 2010, 08:27:01 PM
     :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-*

          With Our EIGHTIETH LIMERICK PAGE, filling, up, very FAST,
          Our TOPIC: IRISH LIMERICKS AHEAD, won't run, out, of GAS;
          27,608 times, hath IT been READ,
          By, both, THE LIVING, &, THE UNDEAD,
          Before Ye know it, this number will ha'e been Double-SURPASSED!

     :o ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ;D ~~~~~ ::) ~~~~~ :o ~~~~~ :-*
                                      EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 25, 2010, 06:06:53 PM
 :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ Zombie Razz

                     THE Von WOLFSTEIN CURSE!
                     -------------------------------

               A million Limericks run, through my BRAIN,
               Echoes, of MONSTER PUNS, in sweet REFRAIN;
               They "jig-saw puzzle", THROUGH,
               I make sense, of them, for YOU,
               As I print another, the Process begins, AGAIN!

 :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ Zombie Razz
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.  

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: packy120353 on September 25, 2010, 07:01:00 PM
And I admit that I've reticent
with the Limericks I've never sent.
I await for the time
I again think in Rhyme
and my funny thoughts won't go unspent!
 
(Thank you Bennett Cerf for the folllowing)
 
Every Limericker is a poet
Sometimes you just wouldn't know it.
The joy we derive
from this thread staying alive
Our feet our Longfellow's and we show it!



Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 25, 2010, 07:32:32 PM
My friend Scottie gave me a warning call,
Keep watching the skies he had some gall,
What's got under your skin to give me a ring,
Believe me friend it was a terrifying Thing,
Just scan the skies and prepare for the coming squall.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 26, 2010, 02:38:28 PM
 :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-*

         There, once, were some VAMPIRES, from MŁnchen,
         Who set a NETTE, by opening a LUNCHEON,
         What helped them, by DAY, to COPE,
         Was their Lustful, UNDYING, HOPE,
         Of wrapping their FANGS, 'round the throat, of GISELE BUNDCHEN!

 :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ thrhrt ~~~~~ :-*
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
           TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 26, 2010, 07:09:34 PM
And I admit that I've been reticent
with the Limericks I've never sent.
I await for the time
I again think in Rhyme
and my funny thoughts won't go unspent!

 
                   (Thank you Bennett Cerf)
             MICHAEL, ROW THE BOAT, ASHORE,
             BENNETT, CERF/SURF THE INTERNET!

          I admit, your Limerick is an inducement, ;D
          To keep my brain, on its Limerick bent, ;)
          I'm glad, you took the time, :D
          To risk the thought, to rhyme, :-[
          For that, you've nothing, to repent! :-*

                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 

Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 26, 2010, 07:20:45 PM
 ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D

         12 Hundred replies, in 81 pages,
         Learned & Wise-Guys; UMA SAGES;
         So, onward, we go,
         More minds, to blow,
         Our little Thread, is THE TALK, OF AGES!

 ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D ~~~ ;D
                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 27, 2010, 06:10:51 PM
 thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt

           COUNT DRACULA arose, from the dead,
           A wicked agenda roiling, within his head:
           "I'll coat this olde mud,
            With my enemies' blood;
            I love it, when they make me see red!"

 thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt ~~ thrhrt
                       EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 27, 2010, 06:51:44 PM
 :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'(

     GLORIA STUART, at 100 years, has completed her last Chore,
     Passed, away, into THE LIGHT, through Earth's Final Door,
     Her Spirit, EVERNOW, soaring, aloft,
     Re-united, I pray, with BORIS KARLOFF;
     A UMA Favourite, we are, all, now, lamentably, more, poor.

 :'( ~~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~~ :'(
                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.  
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on September 28, 2010, 01:56:55 PM

The limericking Baron keeps running amok,
showing no sign of his words getting stuck,
refusing, with each post,
to give up the ghost,
like a movie bad guy that keeps getting up!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a man named Quasimodo,
who made a rather unflattering photo,
in a large cathedral in France,
he had a hopeless romance,
then ended up, as dead as a Dodo!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Poor old Quasimodo.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 28, 2010, 08:14:23 PM
 :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*

           A most reliable fellow, LONG LIVE KONG,
           His turn, at bat, turned, out, very strong;
           He pitched a Double-Header,
           And, what could be better...
           It keeps our LIMERICK Score rolling, along!

 :-* ~~~~ ;D ~~~ ;) ~~~ :D ~~~ ;) ~~~ ;D ~~~~ :-*
       LLK, I LOVED your QUASIMODO LIMERICK! THANKS!
                         EXANIMO EVERNOW,
TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on September 28, 2010, 11:09:55 PM
There was once a robotrix Played by a gal named Helm,
Her beauty was a joy to behold within her realm,
Tall and statuesque with her silver skin,
She flirted with the workers and bosses akin,
Leading the revolt so that they could over whelm.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 29, 2010, 04:59:18 PM
 :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o

         DR JEKYLL was, by all accounts, one Cool DUDE,
         'Tho' MR. HYDE thought him, too much, a PRUDE;
         He reached the end, of Sanity's TETHER,
         They expired, still, mired & stuck TOGETHER,
         On that note, this LIMERICK, I'll, wisely, CONCLUDE.

 :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o ~~~ Zombie Mad ~~~ :o
                           EXANIMO EVERNOW,
     TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on September 30, 2010, 02:59:45 AM
 thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt

         There, once, was a VAMPIRE-SLAYER, named BUFFY,
         She dispatched the UNDEAD, whether refined, or SCRUFFY,
         Her life, filled, with such DRAMA,
         Wounded her, with much TRAUMA,
         Yet, she triumphed, at last, because she was a TUFFY!

 thrhrt ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)~~~~ :'( ~~~~ :-* ~~~~ :o ~~~~ thrhrt
                               EXANIMO EVERNOW,
 TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 01, 2010, 07:08:27 PM
 tynhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ cl:)

              So, UMA, here, we are, at OCTOBER, the First,
              'Tis The Gentle Season {Oh, it could be worse};
              Nestled, 'tween Summer's Heat,
              And, Winter's Relentless Beat,
              HALLOWEEN is a Tricky Treat, rather, than a Curse.

 tynhrt ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ tynhrt ~~~ cl:)
                                 EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 02, 2010, 03:16:22 PM
         ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o

                 OCTOBER 3rd, so, we continue our STORY,
                 Of a MAN, whom I met, via Dear Olde FORRY,
                 HUNGARIAN, by BIRTH,
                 An ARTIST, of GREAT WORTH,
                 BELA LUGOSI, born, this Day, to the UMA's GLORY!

         ;D ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ :o ~~~~ ;D ~~~~ :o
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
      TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 02, 2010, 06:09:12 PM
We could write limericks by the reams,
And spilt the UMA into separate teams,
First there would be the haters,
Followed by the debaters,
But the one thing no one can take from us is our dreams.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 03, 2010, 07:59:11 AM
        ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)

                Being {almost} Human, I make mistakes, a-plenty,
                'Twas, not, the 3rd, for BELA; rather, 'tis, on day 20,
                Old Brain facts, sometimes, get switched,
                ST. FRANCIS' Passing occurred; I glitched,
                BELA'S Birth, 3 day, 'ere mine, is what I meant-y!

        ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ ::)
                                     EXANIMO EVERNOW,
        TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 04, 2010, 03:01:15 AM
   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)

                 The PUMPKIN SEASON hath, again, arrived,
                 Time, for them, to be bought, and, knived,
                 Scooped, out, then, faced,
                 With candle, lit, and, placed,
                 So, HALLOWEEN Goblins know, that, I've survived!

   :o ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ededed ~~~~ ::) ~~~~ :o ~~~~ ::)
                                   EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 04, 2010, 10:49:43 PM
On Saturday the weather was decent
so I attended the Monster Fest most recent
and met some more UMA'ers
(one had more gear than most vampire slayers)
A good start to my favorite season(t)
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 05, 2010, 04:51:18 PM
 ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed

                Job, and, Marriage, lessen my available time,
                Currently, to spend my beleaguered dime,
                On Preps, for Conventions;
                Yet, my Comprehension,
                Is, that, soon, enough, I'll return, in Forms, most fine!

 ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed ~~~ thrhrt ~~~ ededed
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: tv horror on October 05, 2010, 05:47:04 PM
With the draconian measures that he has used,
Our dear Baron cannot be defused,
So if he takes a rest,
Then it is for the best,
Leaving us all the more confused.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 06, 2010, 04:12:25 AM
        Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused

             A LIMERICK a day keeps the Baron off E-Bay,
             Such treasures, they don't sell, by night or day,
             Instead, he robs the Candy Store,
             To sweetly spin his tales, of Gore;
             It rots the Brains, of ZOMBIES, so, he can dine some more!

         Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused ~~~~~~~ Zombie Confused
                                    EXANIMO EVERNOW,
       TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G. 
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 06, 2010, 05:53:03 AM
If eBay's your poison, you are not alone
Many times I spent paychecks on swag for my home
But it must be avoided
Now that I'm unemployed
So I just browse through stuff I already own
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: long live kong on October 06, 2010, 01:10:21 PM



  Ebay is a place that breeds temptation,
  I've spent more pounds than I care to mention,
  on nostalgic treasures,
  and guilty pleasures,
  hoarded safely 'til I reach my pension!

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: BARON TIMOTHEUS BGG on October 07, 2010, 07:42:00 PM
     :-* ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*

            There, once, was a WEREWOLF, named IVAN,
            Who, by all reports, is, as CRAZY, as I am,
            He'd add LIMERICKS, on occasion,
            Most consider them, "home invasion",
            To add, to the equation, they, all, taste, like SPAM!

     :-* ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :o ~~~ ::) ~~~ :-*
                            EXANIMO EVERNOW,
  TIMMY, THE BARON & BARONESS, &, FRIENDS, GOO-O-OODD!, B.G.G.
Title: Re: WARNING:Irish Limericks Ahead
Post by: Crazy1van on October 08, 2010, 12:05:10 PM
Yes my poems are like home invasion
Maybe its best I take so many vacati